Asgard
by Ioik
Summary: Kari, a very messy waitress from london, gets a bit of a shock when she accidentally collides with asgard, discovers a grandfather she never knew existed and is forced to defend herself from gods and a trickster. If only the right man would come along and rescue her or at least her cat-husband remain faithful. Oh well, maybe a girl can save herself. OCxWhoever-will-put-up-with-her
1. Chapter 1: I'm late, I'm late

Warm buttery toast audibly crunched as a woman force fed a corner into her mouth and left the rest to dangle between teeth. She was late, oh so late, for work and didn't even have time to iron her waitressing uniform. Absentminded, the woman rushed about her tip-site of a living room hunting down keys, bag, phone and whatever else was needed – huffing and cursing all the while. A large tawny-eyed cat surveyed his human with feline amusement from the top of a faded and clawed sofa - tail swishing left to right and back again on loop. As the woman passed him for the fifth time, she suddenly stopped, lifting the cat above her head to his delighted purr and her intake-outtake of sighing relief.

"There it is!" She placed the cat down on the floor, retrieving the butt warmed note-pad and pen. "Silly Griffin." She admonished the feline - now watching her expectantly, from the old-take-out covered dining table, for one of the three f's – fuss, food or fun.

With a quick kiss atop Griffins head, the woman suddenly pivoted mid-hum and skittered towards her front door armed with coat and bag over one arm, keys in the other. It was a bit of a struggle to get out passed the several boxes of recently ordered practical shoes, but with enough kicking, tripping and swearing she was finally out and on her way to the restaurant. Being late was never a good idea, but at least the boss had gotten used to it after all the years she'd worked for him. As she scuttled into the main office, dropping her unworn coat and bag, the manager didn't even bother to look around, he could tell who it was just by the sheer aura of apologetic awkward radiating off the mass behind him – besides, he needed to finish his accounting.

"There's a childrens party in the function room on its way in about an hour."

"Oh please god no." The flustered waitress, trying desperately to pin a smiley-faced nametag to her shirt, visibly shrank. "Anything but that. I'll clean all the baby highchairs."

"Someone already switched for that duty." The manager shrugged, turning to frown at his employee's clothing-creased state and finally leaned forward to do up several buttons on her shirt that had come open or were never shut in the first place. "If you were here on time-"

"I know, I know. Sorry." She sighed, pulling away from his casual fussing of her appearance. "It's not just me is it?"

"Sarah too. She volunteered."

"Brave girl." She sulked towards the office door, picking up a till key on her way out.

Darting through the kitchen, minding not to get burnt by hot plates and overly animated caterers, she plastered on a too big smile as she walked through the restaurant trying her best to seem like she couldn't possibly hear anyone on table six trying to call her over to refill their drink. The function room was wonderfully quiet for the time being, another waitress sat on the edge of a decorated table between clumps of multi-coloured balloons, sharpening pencils.

"Hey Sarah." She ushered over to her colleague and pulled out a half-sized child's chair to sit on awkwardly.

"Hey Kari." Sarah rolled her eyes as she shook a pot of pencils. "Little brats from the last lot."

"I… don't want to know what any of those stains are." Kari grimaced as she took the offered un-sharpened container. "I see you've done pretty much everything."

"Yeah."

"Oh god, eight year olds." She pouted, reading the happy birthday banner spread across the far wall. "I can't believe you volunteered for this."

"I just wanted to leave early today." Sarah shrugged, plopping a clean and pointy implement of childish-horror into a pink pot. "This group is done at three and we can leave as soon as we've cleared up."

"Somewhere to be?"

"There's this exhibition at the history museum." Sarah suddenly looked excited, filtering through her piney to retrieve a brochure. "It's only on till Friday and I can't get off till Saturday."

"And… I was hoping this was going to be about a boy." Kari tutted, giving the pictures on the leaflet a scrutinizing once over. "You need to get out more. Go to places where men are."

"Men go to museums."

"Not any datable ones."

"Well, you'd certainly know about that, Kari. Where did you find that last guy from again? Oh right, pizza hut." Sarah slipped off the table; pencils discarded to the centre and stomped in the direction of the kitchen. "I'll start bringing up the platters."  
"Least I got free chicken wings." She muttered under her breath and gave the exhibition brochure a pout before shoving it into a pocket whilst retrieving her phone.

Flicking through the list of contacts, Kari finally paused at one name in particular – Paul BarGuy – and etched out a cryptic looking text message full of kitten's, love hearts and numbers in place of vowels. Moments after the message was sent, her phone buzzed shocking her into dropping sharpernings all over the floor. With a curse, she knelt down to collect up the itty-bitty pieces of wood shavings and thumbed through the text message in her inbox before hastily typing out a response one handed.

"What are you doing?" Sarah enquired, having returned to the room balancing four platters of kiddie nibbles across two arms like a pro.

"I just dropped the pot aaaaaaand…"

"Hmm?"

"I have a date."

"Who is it this time?" Sarah sighed, placing the food on a clown covered table with random abandon.

"Some guy I met at Yates last weekend." Kari shrugged as she returned to standing and flashed her colleague a picture of a drunk guy pointing at his beer whilst standing on top of a bar with his shirt hanging around his elbows on her phone.

"Nice?" Sarah cringed; glad she was too busy with schoolwork to go out with the other waitresses most nights. "He looks, really, really, nice. A real catch."

"I wouldn't go that far." Kari scoffed. "But he has nice abs. He's meeting me in town at six to catch a movie."

"Hmm. You going to help me bring the rest of this stuff up or squat on the chair pretending to wipe down pencils for the next thirty minutes?"

"Let me enjoy the quiet before the storm." She pouted, beginning to fiddle with balloons now.  
"Whatever."

Three thirty pm, birthday party over, function room cleaned up enough for nobody to notice the stains on the carpet and chewed nature of blunt pencils. Sarah had already vacated the premises, needing to catch her bus to the museum and having taken care of the pre-party set-up. Kari speed walked home, idly trying to tug various sticky clumps from her hair and clothes – she had just enough time for a shower and full-monty-shave. No point in lying about it to herself now, it had been a tough day and Paul-nice-abs BarGuy needed to appreciate the smooth nature of her everywhere tonight.

Arriving home, Griffin stretched his body like an accordion and purred his deep seductive greeting with the lick of his lips. Kari on the other-hand hardly seemed to notice the tabby-terror as she began throwing pieces of clothing onto the floor until naked. Tonight was serious business, the shower needed to be scolding to make sure nothing of that horrendous childrens party was left on her person, her hair needed to be just right, her clothes-

"Shit!" She screeched, mid-leg shave, waving the intense steam from the shower out of her eyes as she thought hard.

When had she done the laundry last? A week? A month? Two months? Yeah, that sounded about right, the washing machine had broken down and started leaking about two months back and she couldn't remember getting around to calling the plumber.

"No, no, no, no!" Kari, ran around her room draped in a mould smelling towel and began throwing piles of clothes too and fro giving the occasional outfit a sniff to check for cleanliness.

Nothing but frumpy old t-shirts and unused gym clothes left in her wardrobe. Maybe she could wear her waitressing outfit, he might think that was kinky, then again he might think she was an incredible loser as well. Now that she thought about it more, that pile of parcels down stairs by the door, it hadn't just been practical shoe's she'd ordered had it? One way to find out.

Skittering down the stairs, trailing water droplets and soggy footprints as she went, Kari began dismantling the boxes by the door, tossing wrapping, tissue paper and unusable items into the ever-increasing mess in her living room. Griffin hovered, perched like a watchful gargoyle on top of an overlooking bookshelf and began to clean a paw. There was a shriek of excitement from his human, a sound worthy of a responding question-mark meow.

Kari held a collection of several workable items in front of her eyes for a pride-filled giggle then jogged back up stairs to get ready. It wouldn't be as cute as one of her slinky, short skirt numbers but with enough accessories and maybe letting her hair down and curled she could pull off the jeggings and purple eighties big shirt thing she'd bought on a whim. Yeah, if she let it hang off the shoulder, one of those gym tank tops she never wore underneath and that weird chunky necklace she bought at that hippie fair – it could still work.

"Oh Griffin, tell me I'm fabulous." She gave herself a wink in the mirror as the tabby cat rolled to show her his belly. "I know right. Ok, let's you and me get laid tonight."

She turned almost tripping on a pile of underwear and lifted the eager-for-attention cat under one arm before making her way down stairs. The kitchen was – well, let's not talk about the kitchen. Kari dropped her fluffy burden on the only free space along the worktop – the cat in question following his human with an expectant gaze as a vaguely clean cereal bowl was produced and then filled with fish smelling food.

"I'll see you later big boy." She leaned in, planting a kiss and ignored scratch behind the ear on the felines head.

With a snort of amusement, Kari wandered away from the munching puss-cat and collected up her bag. As if an after thought on her way out, she paused, bending down to pick up the first pair of shoes her fingers came into contact with and walked out onto the street pulling them on. Practical and sort of went with the outfit – the man wouldn't be looking at her feet anyway.


	2. Chapter 2: Stupid museums

Leaning up against a glass panel, Kari huffed strands of hair out of her face as the bus tussled her about. It was just coming up to six in the evening, rush-hour hitting its full swing and along with it sweaty smelling men rubbing up against her one too many times to just be coincidence. Maybe she shouldn't have worn the push-up-bra with the tank top she'd obviously bought when thinner and expecting to stay that way – there was whore level cleavage on display every time she leaned a little forward. Whatever, Paul would like it.

Reaching between the arms of a giant moustache with a grinning man attached to it, she hit the button to warn the driver she wanted off his cheap and dreary ride just as her phone began buzzing against her hip – where she'd lodged it after discovering the jeggings had no pockets. It shocked her at first then made her laugh in a peculiar manner that actually deterred the leering moustache from his come-hither looks. As she skipped off the bus, phone in hand and not paying attention, Kari narrowly missed walking into a lamppost as the message made her stop mid-step and frown.

"Fuck you too, Paul." She rolled her eyes, slamming her thumb on the reply keys in the throws of sending her would-be-date a heartless, kittenless but vowel included response.

What was she supposed to do now? Moving out the line of pedestrian traffic, she slumped against a wall and filtered through her phone without expectation. She couldn't go to the cinema on her own, that'd just be too pathetic. Shops were shutting around her like beacons of hope blinking out. Maybe Sarah was still at that museum thing, it was only a few minutes walk away and maybe she could drag her to the cinema and dinner afterwards. Could even be boys in it for them both and she sure as hell wasn't going to waste a clean shave day.

"Stupid museum." She filtered through her bag, hoping to find that brochure Sarah had left her with earlier. "Stupid men too. Ah-hah! Found you."

Weaving the sea of city-folks, Kari made her way up to the large, unmistakable, history museum and jogged up the stairs. They were still open for a couple more hours - long enough to find a waitress and convince her to stop being boring. As she ushered through the quiet entrance she was rather surprised to find there wasn't so much a price to get in but a noncommittal "donation" to enter. Did they really expect people to pay if they didn't have too? That was just weird, even so, Kari could feel the pangs of guilt as she tried to walk on past pretending not to see the sign and slipped some random change she found at the bottom of her bag into the box – also an accidental stick of gum.

Sarah would probably be around the new exhibition - according to the brochure it had something to do with Aztec's. At least it was sign-posted nicely, and with so few visitors it didn't take long for her to find it. The whole exhibition was huge, filling what felt like a stadium-sized room with strange carvings and what she assumed were replica buildings. The history buffs sure seemed to be into old stuff.

Walking around, trying not to touch anything – as it all looked expensive – Kari searched for her colleague to no avail. She supposed it was probably a long shot Sarah would even still be here, having most probably arrived three hours before hand. What was there to captivate for three hours?

Huffing with annoyance, Kari, leaned up against a weird pillar looking thing and started flicking through her phone until she found Sarah's name and sent her a quick message. A few minutes passed with no response making Kari tut at the situation and kick off the priceless antique – luckily without damaging it. She paused, placing her phone between her jeggings and hip and turned to give her leaning post a critical look. There was something embedded in the stone that caught her eye, a seed shaped dark gem about half the size of her fist sitting in the centre of a tree looking symbol.

Kari hummed, leaning in closer and closer until her nose was practically against the gem. It was swirling – or at least its insides were swirling like ink coloured oil being turned in water.

"Miss, please don't touch the exhibits." An aggravated man called from across the walk way – his fingers pointing at a sign by the pillar that read 'Please do not touch.'

"Oh, sorry." Kari grinned her too big waitress smile as she curved her head away from inspection. "I didn't mean to-" she paused as her hand just barely grazed the symbol on the pillar and the guard's eyes flew wide in shock.

She was glowing, or the pillar was glowing? No, something was glowing around her. Kari swallowed, managing to glimpse at her hand just long enough to note the way the gem was now no longer black but every colour of the rainbow, and then everything got really, really weird. Like, no sound, then every sound, then possibly flying but standing still with stuff flying at her face. It was worse than the time she went to that theme park, way, way worse but the ending was exactly the same so at least she had a point of reference for this experience.

As everything stopped, or she stopped and hit the ground there was a lot of noise and shouting echoing everywhere at once. Kari pushed herself up onto shaking knees from the uncomfortable position she'd body planked into and slapped her ears a couple of times to dislodge the ringing. Everything was gold, including the very tall armor wearing man being angry at her.

"I'm sorry what?" She slurred out as her mind tried to catch up with what was going on.

"How. Did. You. Get. Here?" Heimdall repeated slow and angry enough to hopefully get through to the pale looking creature kneeling at his feet.

"I um… I- Oh god!" Kari suddenly dived forward onto hands and knees, all the kiddie nibbles she'd been pilfering from the children's birthday party making a second appearance all over the nice man's gold boots.


	3. Chapter 3: Everything is golden

The cold of the floor was really nice beneath her palm, though the arguing wasn't quite as pleasant. Having gotten over the initial embarrassment of puking on a huge guys golden shoes, Kari, was treated to some rather ungentle tossing over a shoulder followed by a sideways horsie ride that made her feel increasingly sea sick – horses not being her most favourite of beast either – and finally dragged across a very expensive looking floor to be bellowed at by a guy with a spear that made her cry. By that point, however, even she wasn't sure which part of the days events had driven her off the edge – eight year olds, laundry, moustache-men, getting stood-up, rainbow-puke-rollercoaster, all the gourde gold?

Having tried to explain herself several times and getting no where, Kari had instead elected to puke for a second time on a guard before finally being allowed to sit on the floor and bury her face between her knees. That's when the arguing had started. The big gold wearing guy – Heimdall – was rumbling deeply about having seen stuff he couldn't of possibly seen because she was sure she saw nothing as big and gold as he anywhere near her before today. Then the shouty king guy – Odin – was apparently confused or just tired of repeating something and got into an argument with a tall blond.

Having been drowning the world out like a well-practiced hangover-ee, Kari, wasn't aware she was being spoken to again until someone lightly squeezed her shoulder and offered her a hand to stand with. It was a woman this time, with a much friendlier disposition than everyone else in the hall glaring daggers of suspicion at her. Mesmerized by her smile, she took the offered appendage and regained her feet somewhat shakily and blinked in the room for a second time. There were a few more people in here than she previously noted before, mostly standing around the tall smug looking blond but her attention was quickly redirected to the woman once again.

"Are you feeling a little better, dear?"

"Whut?" Kari blinked in the words rather than hearing them.

"You aren't going to be, unwell, again are you?" The woman repeated.

"No, no. I'm fine. I just really don't like rollercoaster's."

"I see." The woman continued with a slight nod and clearing of her throat as the blond crew began to chuckle before stopped dead. "I am Frigga and this my husband Odin, king of Asgard, as you have well met." There was something of a look exchanged between the married couple but it's meaning far to well masked to decipher. "Our sons, princes Thor and Loki. Lady Sif and-"

"The warriors three!" A fat looking redhead burst out before issuing apologies to the queen for his enthusiasm.

"The warrior's three," Frigga continued, pointing out the mostly grinning and one moody looking warriors, "Fandral, Hogun and Volstagg."

"Oh." Kari nodded, swallowing down saliva as if it were information to process. "I'm er… I'm…"

"Have you forgotten your own name, midgardian?"

"Thor." Odin's tone was neutral but filled with authority enough to halt his son's joviality.

"It's Karian Motter, but, er, people just call me Kari." Kari looked away, a slight blush etching on her cheeks at the sheer amount of eyes penetrating her.

"I don't recognize the name." Fandral shrugged. "Are you absolutely sure?"

"Positive." Heimdall said, not taking his eyes off Odin for a second.

"Tell me, Kari, of your parents names." Odin nodded his belief to the guardian.

"What? Why?"

"Humor an old man."

"Um…?" She scrunched her brow, not sure what was going on at this point or any other. "My mother was Darlene Motter and I have no idea who my father was. I think he was Canadian." She shrugged, all eyes flickering back to the shorter blond.

"I do not recognize that name either." Fandral shook his head. "You must have been mistaken Heimdall."

"Further back." Heimdall continued to stare directly at Odin, whom was now pausing for thought.

"I don't know anyone further back." Kari groaned. "Apart from a grandmother maybe called Fran. What's this all about?"

"Francesca?" Fandral's eyes were suddenly alight.

"You recognize that name?" Sif's arms momentarily slipped to her sides before returning to folded as she watched the stranger.

"I do." He came forward, closely followed by Sif, Thor and the other two warriors, until looming down on the terrified looking midgardian. "Let me see you more closely."

"Why are you touching me?" Kari visibly shuddered at the hands suddenly lifting her arms as if she might have a strange tattoo and pulling her chin from one side to the other.

"Hah! Those are definitely your eyes." Thor exclaimed with a laugh and clap on the other blonds shoulder.

"And your nose." Sif commented initiating Fandral into a profile pose touching the tip of his nose with index finger.

"Is it so?"

"Sadly yes, my condolences." Loki had appeared as if by magic to Kari's left making her jump at first and then get somewhat annoyed as she realized what was just said.

"What's wrong with my nose?" She frowned at the green-eyed prince causing him to shake his head with a playful smile.

"That's definitely Francesca's hair." Fandral appeared caught in a moment, fingers entwined in Kari's now messy curls.

"Please stop touching me."

"Enough." Odin commanded, the group scattering back several paces from their previous interest. "It seems we have some answer."

"No! I don't have any answers!" Kari clung to herself now feeling somewhat violated on top of everything else. "I have had a really tough day to day with children's birthday parties, a stood-up date. Rush hour! Museums that guilt you into donating! Roller coasters, horses, shouting people and someone insulted my nose!" She paused to wipe away the prickling of tears. "So will you all stop being so bloody cryptic and touchy feely and tell me what the heck is going on?!"

"Come here." Frigga was suddenly all over her like a pleasant rash - with the added bonus of some back rubbing - whilst she had a bit of a cry on her shoulder.

It took a minute or two for Kari to fully compose herself again, though the others seemed more interested with a discussion of "What's rush hour?" As Frigga stepped back again, reclaiming her space next to Odin, there was a general hush as the king explained as much of the details as he thought the girl could understand. Apparently she'd been touching some sort of asgardian – which is what they called themselves - artifact in the museum that used dark energy to connect with a tree-rainbow-bridge – or at least that was what she took from the explanation and filed under 'lunatic conspiracies' in her brain. The reason he and Heimdall had been so shouty before hand turned out to be because only an asgardian should have been able to use such a device but she was human – except for the fact of Fandrall.

"You are kidding me." Kari's head swung like a demonic pendulum to stare at the blond haired, moustache wielding, hands in her hair creeper. "No!" Her mouth went wide, grimaced and then clicked shut as she stomped over to give him a feeling up now. "No! No! That is my nose. Oh god. No!"

"I do not wish to worry you friend, but I do not think this maiden cares for your inclusion in her ancestry." Thor laughed.

"I would be upset too." Sif added with a snort.

"Do not judge her too harshly, friends. Once she's got a hot meal in her I'm sure she'll come around." Volstagg began to shake the melancholy out of Fandral.

Kari had already scuttled away again, somewhere closer to Frigga's direct line of sight, and was now refusing to meet anyone's gaze. This was a lot to take in and worse still; her grandfather was better looking than her.

"Can I go home now?" she queried, the instinct to run beginning to kick in.

"No." Odin shook his head, leaning back into his throne with a regrettable sigh.

"But-"

"It would be best for both your realm and ours if someone able to open portals between the two were not so vulnerable." He gave her a somewhat weary look, as if he could taste war on the winds. "Who knows what forces watch. I am sure you will come to like it here."

"No I wont! I have a life! A job! Griffin!"

"You have a griffin?" Sif raised an eyebrow.

"Don't be stupid. It's my cat!"

"An easy mistake to make." Thor chuckled, coming towards the now wide-eyed midgardian – he was a lot taller than she'd previously noticed. "Welcome to asgard!" He bellowed happily, slamming his palm into her shoulder as some sort of greeting but failing to recall how fragile a creature she was.

Kari was unaware of the next few minutes. She knew he had smacked her quite hard on the shoulder and things had moved but was completely unaware of whose eyes she was looking into when she regained consciousness.

"You are beautiful." She blurted out.

Loki looked up at the others hovering above himself and the woman in his arms with an apologetic look for Fandral who was now pulling his kin away from the silver-tongued princes grasps.

"She doesn't know what she is saying." He re-adjusted the concussed girl over his shoulder and headed off towards a healing room.


	4. Chapter 4: Hope

A day and a half of sitting alone in a small, sparsely furnished, room had done nothing to shake the sorry-for-herself mentality Kari currently harbored. Fandral had dropped by to say something but she hadn't really listened and instead said some rather hurtful things until he'd walked away mutely. Two other women – or aliens, as she'd come to think of them - had poked there heads in but did little more than drop off some clothing and fruit with pointed stares of misgiving. She'd ignored the clothing, eaten some of the recognizable fruit and tried not to sniff her two day worn clothing with vomit stains.

By the increase of light streaming in through the solo window behind her, Kari was reasonably sure it was somewhere around the afternoon time. Things did look rather nice outside, if a bit over-dramatically sparkly. She wondered how long they were going to keep her imprisoned here, her memory filling in that answer with a mock Odin voice of 'forever'. She groaned, knees rising to meet her forehead on the bed and thumped the mattress out of frustration. Poor Griffin, he was probably mewling at the front door by now wondering where she was.

"Stupid asgard." Kari growled, hopping off the bed with some enthusiasm and moving with some determination towards the door.

On the other side, in the ridiculously over-sized corridor, was the same guard that had been hovering outside her door since yesterday. He eyed her; weary and dismissive at the same instance, assuming she was going to use the toilet again -her plans, however, were not about to meet his expectation anytime soon. Breaking out into a run, Kari partially skidded along the overly polished floor thinking she was going to make some sort of daring escape back to earth. The guard was barely two steps behind, jogging at a long-legged and comfortable pace – this was much more interesting than waiting to watch her go to pee during the night.

Not being the most athletic creature on planet earth, it hadn't taken Kari long to finally stop, collapse to her knees and wheeze at the floor for oxygen. The guard came to a halt somewhere behind her, unfazed by the exercise and gave a questioning look behind them to the spot they had come from and finally finished – she hadn't even made it to the end of the corridor.

"Are you going to take me back now?" Kari glared at the guard acting as if he didn't see her. "I just want to go home, why can't you people understand that!" She was standing now, shouting at someone who didn't care. "Why aren't you saying anything? Hello?" she began waving a hand in front of his face, finally getting a response in the form of a dangerous and pointed look. "Well, I'm just going to- to go over here then. If you're not stopping me."

Still unsure, she kept her gaze fixed on him and took several steps towards the end of the corridor – he continuing to follow two steps behind. He just seemed to be stalking her - in a very intimidating manner – and saying nothing about her choice of direction. Perhaps he thought she couldn't possibly make it out of such a convoluted twist of corridors and rooms?

Having found a particularly ornate looking door, Kari gave the guard another questioning look before tentatively pushing it open. It lead to what looked like an old library, though a bigger collection of paper-shaped things she'd never seen before. Tiptoeing inside – trying to be as quiet as she recalled libraries were supposed to be – she worked her way along a bookshelf much to high for her to ever reach the top of without a ladder. She thought of asking the guard if he'd let her stand on his shoulders to get a better look but looking behind her, discovered he was still standing out in the corridor and looking bored. Maybe he was allergic to paper.

Kari hummed curiously as she peered at text she couldn't read and delved deeper into the labyrinth of books. There was an open space towards what seemed to be the centre of the room and someone wandering around drawing on the ground with chalk. She frowned at the scene, coming closer with folded arms ready.

"Should you be doing that?" She whispered in an accusing tone.

The man stopped what he was doing, looking up at her with a caught-in-the-act look on his face then went right back to his graffiti art.

"Hey! Stop that!" She tried again.

"Why are you whispering?" Loki, mimicking her quietness, finally responded.

"This is a library, you're supposed to whisper." She whispered angrily. "And you're not supposed to do that."

"Who told you that?"

"There's signs."

"I do not see any signs."

"Well… why are you whispering then?"

"I thought we were conspiring." He shrugged finishing his floor design and stepping into the centre. "I suggest you stand back." He swatted a hand in her direction, voice returned to a normal level.

"Why? What are yo-" Kari froze as the drawing on the floor lit up and Loki snapped out of reality with a 'pop'. "The hell?"

Stumbling forward – wrapped in a blanket of shock and disbelief – she curved her neck, torso following the movement, until she was bent over and blinking at where a Loki and his artwork had once been. Her brain had almost completely shut down on her by this point, this was not right, libraries were supposed to transport you to otherworld's figuratively not literally. That puking feeling was beginning to settle in her stomach again as she turned and high-tailed it out of there.

Her knees were against her chest as she precariously balanced on a bench and watched the shadows of a tree – rocked by the wind – on the path below. She'd managed to find an archway, leading to a large walled in garden, after fleeing the library at another run. Somewhere over to her left, the hounding guard had taken up residence on another bench enjoying the sun like a dosing cat.

Kari let out a deep, despondent, sigh as she stretched her legs out to meet the floor and readjusted into a not so uncomfortable position. A delicate hand suddenly appeared on her shoulder, her eyes fixed on the appendage until a voice accompanied the scene with a sense of relief.

"I had wondered when we would see you again." Frigga walked around the bench until able to sit besides the woman. "Here, for you."

A long stem was placed within Kari's uncertain grip, the end of which topped with a cluster of small star shaped white flowers. She frowned, humming her curiosity as her arm guided the offering to her nose for a sniff.

"A flower of hope." Frigga smiled at the way the other woman held the gift at the base much like a child with a wooden sword. "I thought you could use a little."

"Thank you." Kari nodded. "But I'd much rather go home."

"I know, dear." She nodded giving the girls free hand a squeeze. "But you must learn to trust in the allfather's judgment. He is usually right."

"Hmm." Kari chewed her lip then looked sidelong at the guard snoring gently on his perch. "Why… why is he following me?"

"To keep you from harm. There are dangers here you are not used to."

"Then it isn't safe here for me."

"The danger is from ignorance not others." Frigga chuckled. "Once you have acclimatized to our ways here, your companion," she inclined her head towards the guard, "will no longer be needed."

"What if I don't want to acclimatize?" She scowled at her thighs, plucking at loose threads and dirt. "My life, my home, my friends, it… it's me. It's everything that makes me, me. And you want me to dress like you, talk like you, do whatever it is you do here and that's just not who I am."

"I understand." Frigga nodded wrapping her arm around Kari's shoulder for a reassuring hold. "Perhaps you should speak to Odin, request to bring a few things from your old life to bridge the gap between the new."

"I can do that?"

"You are proclaimed a citizen of Asgard and he your king."

"I-hmmm." She cringed a little at that answer already having a queen to look up to back home in England but before she could think on it further, Frigga, had already risen, woken the guard from his slumber and indicated he should take Kari to the throne room for an audience.


	5. Chapter 5: Hey Gramps

Kari leaned against the wall, then slid down the wall and finally banged the back of her head against it a few times. She'd been waiting outside the throne room to talk to Odin for two, maybe three, hours. Yes, he was a busy man, that was obvious, but weren't there other people to deal with some of the queue she was stuck in.

Finally the doors opened again and Kari jumped up expectantly, having finally made it to the head of the line. A disappointed cloak swished by, slapping her across the face with its fluttering before the exiting man wearing it stomped out of sight. Her guard soon ushered her forward, into the throne room and across the polished floor she'd previously been dragged along.

Odin was leaning back in his chair looking a lot older than she remembered him, his one good eye following her silently as she watched her guard get to his knees, fist to heart. Raising an eyebrow at the display of obedience she suddenly recalled something similar was expected on her own world too – in regards to the queen - and instead did a wobbly curtsy in place of bruising her knees. If Odin was annoyed or appreciative of her demonstration he showed no signs and instead ordered the guard to rise and leave them.

"What have you too say, Fandralkin?"

"Fandralkin?" Kari blurted out before really thinking. Right, they liked to give themselves surnames about parentage and stuff. "Er, well, the thing is…"

"My time is not so free." He spurred her on.

"Yes, yes, I know. I just… how do I put this? I um, I want to ask you to let me go back to earth-"

"No."

"I haven't finished."

"Very well." He made himself a bit more comfortable, ready to listen to more dawdling speech. "Continue."

"I want to go back to pick up some of my things to, uh," What had his wife said again? "bridge the gap between my old life and new one. And maybe tell my friends I'm going away so they don't think I'm just dead and hold a funeral. That would be really morbid."

"I have heard your request and the answer is as it was before." He paused for dramatics. "No."

"Oh, come on don't be like that!" She was starting to get really flustered now. "Just this one thing and I'll willingly stay and stop thinking of you as a kidnapper." Odin laughed at her accusation, which only added embarrassment to her list of issues today. "Your wife just gave me hope, but I suppose you can just take that as well." She gritted her teeth, tossing the flower she still held at the king's feet.

Odin went suddenly quiet, his gaze hard and heavy like a mountain as he stood and retrieved the stem. Moving one foot in front of the other, turning the flower round and round between forefinger and thumb, the king descended the steps of his throne to the girl shaking with mutual fear and anger. As they came face to face, he reached down taking her hand and placing the discarded gift back in her palm.

"Hope is never a gift you should so idly throw away, or, allow others to take from you." He commented, closing her fingers around the stem and simultaneously slamming his spear on the ground. "Go, bring me Fandral." He commanded of a guard and returned to his seat.

Chewing on her lip, Kari fidgeted uncomfortably as they waited for her grandfather to appear – she supposed Odin wanted to have him chastise her as well. As the man in question finally arrived, flashing her a worried look, he took to his knees at the allfathers feet and waited to be commanded to stand.

"Fandral," Odin began, indicating for him to reclaim his feet, "a request has been made for your kin to return to midgard and retrieve items of a personal nature. I cannot allow her to go alone, but, if a warrior volunteered as escort…"

"You know I, my king. I could never turn my back on a maiden in need." Kari visibly blanched, shocked at Fandral's words - she had been sure he'd never even speak to her again, let alone help her, after the array of names she had called him yesterday.

"Then I will allow it on the condition that you both return within the day and you, Fandralkin," he turned his attention back to the woman, "may only bring what you can carry. If there is any hope of your integration then you cannot be weighed down by the past."

"Yes, ok." She nodded, mentally trying to calculate just how many shoe's she could actually carry in one go. "I accept."

Earth! Oh gods was it good to see earth again, she thought between violent up chucking all over the grass. Grass, real, lovely green – also yellow with chunks of orange – grass.

"Are you alright?" Fandral tried desperately not to notice, for her sake as well as his, all the puking.

"Yes." Kari responded, spitting the taste from her mouth. "Oh smell that air!"

"It smells foul."

"I know!" She laughed whipping the asgardian into the humor with her. "I've missed good ole, London air. It's too flowery and clean up there." She pointed randomly upwards at the sky only to have her arm position moved a little to the left.

"Actually, asgard is over there."

"Oh." She looked directly along the line of her finger at the clouds, coming to the realization that this all really wasn't just a bizarre cheese induced dream. "We should uh, I… I live… I used to live, down that way." She inclined her head as her feet began to follow the route.

After an awkward filled and silent walk, the pair made it to a row of houses and stopped at a blue door. She fished about in her bag for the keys, finding them caught at the bottom on some thread and began to fiddle the door open.

"Maybe you should… it's a mess."

"I do not mind. Besides I am curious to see your home." Fandral flashed one of his more dashing smiles.

"Yeah, uh, ok but… I warned you." Kari rolled her eyes, pushing the door open to the unsurprising catastrophe inside.

There was a deafening level of silence as they both carefully made there way into the house. Kari's cheeks flushed with embarrassment, as he said nothing, only surveying the destruction sight with a blank facade. This was why she hated having people over, the silent judging cataloging of her life followed by a sarcastic 'nice place'.

"Make yourself at home…" She shrugged, as he still seemed to in shock to reach the verbal stage of first time viewers. "Take a look around and whatever."

She scuttled upstairs before he could find words to respond and headed straight for the bedroom. A suitcase, that's what she needed, there was one under the bed but first she had to move several piles of clothing out of the way. That was another thing, all her clothes reeked.

"Hey, gramps!" She called down the stairs, the blond in questions head popping into view over the railing. "I need to go to a launderette to get my clothes washed."

"Very well, but only if you never call me 'gramps' again."

"Oh, I thought it would be endearing." Kari snorted, disappearing back into her room to collect up some laundry.


	6. Chapter 6: Electricity

Sitting in a launderette with an asgardian dressed as Robin Hood, that was also your long lost and much better looking grandfather, was truly a bizarre situation to be left in. They were waiting for the clothes to finish a wash cycle, Kari tapping out a rhythm on the plastic chair below her and trying her best not to keep making eye contact with Fandral. After several minutes had past, he started to clear his throat in a very attention seeking sort of way and she realized she couldn't put off the impending bonding about to transpire.

"You mentioned before you know not of your father?"

"Nope." Kari visibly shrank, head delving as far into her neck and shoulders as possible.

"And your mother?"

"Do we-" she paused, not wanting to dredge up the past but also realizing her mother was his daughter after all. "She died in a car crash when I was six. She used to work as a nurse here in London at one of the hospitals."

"Ah, a healer." Fandral seemed somewhat pleased with himself. "And yourself?"

"I'm a waitress. I take peoples orders and smile big until they leave happy with their meal."

"Ah, a serving wenc- girl." The disappointment in his tone wasn't quite as well concealed as he probably thought it was.

"Is that it?" Kari frowned, annoyed that was all he was going to ask and his blank expression didn't help matters either. "You know, nobody ever came to claim me when my mother died. I had a really shitty time getting pushed through the foster care system and you don't want to know what kind of sick fucks are infesting that. Then low and behold I find out that YOU exist all this time later and all you have to say is "Ah, a serving wench?""

"Where are you going?" He stood, his words pausing her hand on the door handle.

"I'm going to work to tell my boss that some guy that fucked my grandmother is taking me away so I won't be able to cover my shifts." She responded darkly.

"Come back before this," he pointed at the washing-machine, "finishes."

"Whatever." Kari was out the door and unable to slam it due to the fire-safety features, which meant she had to kick a can on the pavement instead.

This was all too much, to many things happening at once. She was happy with her heading-nowhere-fast life and now they were taking it all away and handing her a shiny new one. Well, she didn't need Christmas presents so late in life, they would have been better received when she was a little girl and actually needed them. And what was Fandral's problem? Why was he being so calm and just taking it? He should shout back or something. No, that was just her being stupid as usual, blowing up at a guy that was probably just as shocked as she was to find out about her.

"Kari?"

"Hey boss." She walked into the restaurant office, awkward, apologetic grin and all. "I know I was supposed to come in yesterday and… today but something's kind of sort of come up."

"You look a little worse for wear." He was standing now, his eyes running up and down her creased and messy appearance.

"Yeah I… look the thing is. I have this grandpa guy that just sort of turned up out of the blue from uh, china, and… I have to- I want to go back with him and… he's…"

"Family, I get it." He nodded solemnly, though also calculating ways to alter the waitressess shifts to fill the gap. "When are you leaving exactly?"

"Tonight."

"Well, that's a bit short noticed."

"I know, look, I'm really sorry you can keep my wages for the week to make up for it yeah?"

"Don't be silly."

"No, really I don't need it."

"This grandfather of yours must be rich."

"Uh, sort of." She shrugged, how exactly do you explain asgard and alien palaces without getting a trip to the mental ward?

"We're gonna miss you." He nodded, not sure what else to really say.

"Could you tell the others?"

"Sure."

"I uh…" Kari stood there, looking at her feet then looking at him looking at his feet until she grabbed the end, of all this, like a thread slipping between her fingers and reeled it in.

Her fingers grasped the top of his shirt yanking him forward until he half fell against her - their lips mashed in a surprised kiss. She'd wanted to do that ever since she started working for him but he was her boss and that kind of relationship always got messy. Who knew quitting would be such a fun thing to do.

As they parted, each panting for air, he blinked at her in a hazed confusion before his eyes flickered towards the open door. He needed to remedy that quickly, and lock it for good measure.

As Kari returned to the launderette, a new bag in hand and increasingly untidy hair and clothing, she frowned at Fandral's back with some added disdain. She had actually planned to apologies and try to make it up to him when she got back but that was all ruined now. The blond in question was giggling with a woman about her age, the aura of flirtation around the pair reeking with pheromones and detergent.

"Hey granddad." Kari smirked as the man in question turned surprised to see her.

"Granddad?" The woman of his affections repeated Kari's words and gave a questioning look between the two kin - obviously thinking it was some sort of joke. "You don't look old enough to be her grandfather."

"You are too kind, my lady." Fandral bowed leaving a tender kiss on the back of the woman's hand. "But it is as she calls me."

"What? I-"

"He's older than he looks." Kari came closer to the pair and turned her head to show her profile. "See, I have his nose."

"That's very nice." The woman was increasingly confused, looking between the pair several times until finally stepping away to claim her finished laundry. "Well it was nice to meet you, Fandral."

"And you, my lady." He smiled after the hurriedly retreating woman.

"I don't need aunts and uncles to deal with too right now." Kari rolled her eyes at her laughing grandfather. "Besides, she was about my age! Do you have no boundaries?"

"I promise you, my dear, I had no intentions of courting that woman." He pointed towards the drier, now filled with her clothes. "She was helping me to work this machine in your absence. You took a rather long time." He eyed her critically now, noting the increasing disheveledness of her being and the bag in her hand. "What is this?"

"It's… a solar charger for my iPod." She sighed, he giving her a blank look. "So I can listen to music stored on a machine without having to worry about it running out of magical power stuff."

"You mean electricity." He nodded. "I have been to this world many times before."

"Oh." She was somewhat surprised and worried – he probably had other grandchildren running around earth unknown and along with them removing that feeling of being 'special' to someone for the first time in years. "Well, thanks for sorting out the clothes."

Along came that awkward silence again as they both watched the timer on the drier tick down, both relieved when they could finally remove the items and take them back to the house. Then of course came the ordeal of having to choose which items to take and which to discard. There was definitely no point in taking anything more than the iPod in the electronics department – she couldn't imagine asgard having internet. Some casual clothes, some work clothes – for whatever job she could find around a land of gods – and two or three or ten party outfits. No wait, two party outfits, she needed room for shoes in the increasingly full suitcase.

Working her way through draws and cupboards now, picking up a few random things of use, she came across an old envelope filled with photos long since seen the light of day. Kari scowled, at the yellowing paper, then sighed as she started to thumb through the pictures within. Before she could come to a conclusion about this particular dilemma there was a sudden expression of hissing fury and smashing.

Tossing the envelop onto the bed, Kari took the stairs two at a time as she skidded into the hallway and jumped a selection of obstacles into the kitchen. Fandral was backed up against the wall nursing a bleeding arm as a tabby cat – hairs all along his body and tail puffed up – growled with determination at him.

"It scratched me!" Fandral sounded more impressed than upset as he looked up at her in the doorway.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes I-" He paused realizing she wasn't speaking to him but the cat now purring happily in her worried arms. "You know this beast?"

"He's my husband." Kari started making kissy noises at her big soppy fluff ball. "Or at least the only man that will ever put up with me. This is Griffin, my cat."

"I see." He nodded his approval of the creature.

"Hey, do me a favour, I need to get him into a b. a. s. k. e. t. quickly before he knows what's going on."

"A bas-"

"Shhh, he knows English."

"Just not how to spell?"

"Exactly." Kari nodded as if this was completely plausible and made her way into the living room with a casual head-flick towards a pet carrier on top of a fireplace.

Making sure Griffin was in no way facing the basket - and completely at her whim in under-chin-scratching-bliss – she soothed the purring feline with cooing sounds as Fandral readied the trap. It was one of those swift motion things where Fandral – being a novice to the procedure – fared rather better than expected. Door was opened, Kari turned grabbing the scruff of the cat's neck and before he'd even realized what was happening, Griffin was hissing at the back of the carrier with no escape. Fandral held on tight as the basket flung in every direction at the felines displeasure, claws reaching out of the ventilation holes at random timings until finally things settled down to a low wailing sound of self-pity within.

"Odin's beard!" Fandral exclaimed as he was finally able to place the carrier down on the sofa.

"And that's why I call him Griffin." Kari chuckled as she headed back upstairs. "I'm about ready to go, but, uh, there's something maybe you'd like upstairs."

"Me?"

He followed her up into the bedroom, unsure what she could possibly have that he'd require. She was sitting on the bed when he came in, trying to force her suitcase shut though over stuffed.

"It's just there, on the bed." She nodded towards a yellow package now climbing on top of the suitcase to try a new tactic of shutting.

Following her direction he picked up the object, taking a seat on the bed as he looked through the inner-contents. It was a series of small paintings- no photo's. He didn't recognize the people within them, not at first anyway, until he came upon a picture of a proud looking, curly haired woman standing by a tree. Francesca, he outwardly smiled, mimicking the woman in the photo then continued through the collection.

"Mostly mother, a few of grandma and the ugly looking baby," Kari leaned in closer, having shut her case, and pointed out a wrinkly looking bald infant being held up to the camera, "was me. Bald was not a good look."

"You look charming." He laughed at her cringing expression. "May I keep a few of these?"

"You can keep them all, I never look at them anyway."

"Thank you." He pocketed the stash somewhere inside his tunic and stood to admire her suitcase shutting handiwork. "Can you carry that?"

"Sure I can." She tried to lift the case and almost gave herself a hernia. "Gods, why is it so heavy I have hardly anything in it? Give me a second, I'll meet you outside."

"Do not dawdle, we need to be back at the transport point in less than an hour."

"So no pressure then…" She sighed, reopening the so hard to close case. What more of her life could she cast away?


	7. Chapter 7: Over the rainbow

The third time travelling through the bifrost was certainly better than the first two times. Kari groaned contemplating throwing up, as Heimdall stood a good distance away from the green-tinted midgardian, but managed to keep her pride intact this time. Griffin on the other hand was 'raowing' loudly in his carrier, eyes wide in fear and equal viciousness at the asgardians hovering around him.

"The allfather allowed you to bring this creature to our realm?" Heimdall stared, red eyes meeting gold in a battle of wills.

"Yeah, sure." She grunted, Fandral swooping in to take her suitcase from her. "Hey, I thought you said I had to carry it myself?"

"Only too asgard, my dear." Her grandfather held the back crippling weight as if it were nothing.

"Thank god, my back is killing me."

"If I might suggest, you should probably discontinue throwing the word 'god' around so casually in asgard."

"Hmmm." Kari frowned, following him across the in-need-of-health-and-safety rainbow bridge towards the palace.

The moment they arrived back at 'her room', Fandral propping the case on the bed, she sat the pet carrier down on the floor and released the latch. Nothing happened at first, Griffin staring up at them both with equal annoyance but without warning there was a streak of fur that whizzed out into the room and dived straight under the bed. Kari bent over, looking at the golden glowing eyes peering back at her like some children's storybook monster then straightened herself with a sigh.

"He's going to be mad at me for a few days."

"He will come around when he sees the gardens." Fandral consoled with a smile.

"Yeah, probably. Look…" She suddenly looked uncomfortable, eyes trailing from left to right and downwards suspiciously as he raised an eyebrow at the display. "I uh…" Biting her lip, she moved two steps forwards, wrapping her arms around his surprised torso.

It was very awkward, the pair of them frozen in that position for a moment or two before Fandral released the breath caught in his throat and mimicked her action. A slight blush trailed over her cheeks as he gave her a light squeeze – it felt a lot nicer than she thought it would, to be held in this manner by family again. Feeling suddenly embarrassed by the prolonged hug, Kari cleared her throat and pushed away from her grandfather – quick to conceal the watery nature of her eyes by turning her back to him and wiping them surreptitiously.

"I uh, I better start unpacking." She moved towards the bed and unclasped the lid to reveal half the amount of items that were first placed within.

"Yes, of course." Fandral excused himself with a nod.

Almost instantly, as the sound of the door clicked shut, she turned, slumping onto the bed next to her old life and began to cry. So many things running through her head at high speed, she couldn't tell which of them she was crying about and lifted her knees up till she was in a ball shape. Something warm and fluffy brushed against her side, followed by a diligent and soothing purr. She sniffled, looking down at the tawny-eyed cat and returned his affection with a slow motion of back length strokes.

"You and me and a bunch of gold obsessed gods, Griffin." She giggled as he answered her with a curt 'meow'. "I bet they have huge rats here for you too eat." He meowed again, slipping onto her lap and plucking at her overly worn clothes.

As several days went by, Kari finding her way around the winding corridors of the palace with greater ease, she began to find herself with friends – or at least friends of friends. The moment she let Griffin out of their room, he'd instantly began charming the flowing skirts off all the women in the servants quarters with his seductive cat ways. Every time she went down a corridor, seeing a crowd of women cooing over something, it was almost always the flirtatious feline rolling on his back giving kitty eyes and purrs for the giggling fan-girls. At least it made the number of suspicious looks she had been receiving decrease, as people had actually started to talk to her now – if only about what an adorable pussy-cat she had. Whatever, she'd take it over death glares any day.

She hadn't seen much of Fandral about, apparently he and a bunch of his warrior friends had gone out on some wild adventure but that was just fine. After so much contact and bonding all in one go it felt nice to have a break from pretending to know how to be part of a family again – she got the feeling he wasn't much good at it himself either. A lot of time had been spent hanging around the gardens, Frigga giving her a lesson in gardening now and then but she apparently lacked a green thumb. Her guard had finally been dismissed after he'd made several complaints to higher-ups about having to listen to her truly awful singing-along, worse still her attempts at rap, to her iPod during the evenings – the solar charger had been working well with asgard sunlight, if a little slow to recharge.

Really, nothing interesting had been happening of late, which was certainly a good change of pace after the whirlwind of activity previous. Though, walking through the palace, on her way back to her room a sense of anticipation filled her about what awaited in the morning.

"Fandralkin!"

"Kari! My name is Kari!" She turned on her heels to face her accuser.

"I know your name quite well." Thor slapped her across both shoulders, effectively pinning her between his hands so she couldn't go flying in either direction for a second round concussion. "I have been informed you will be officially joining the palace as a server in the morrow."

"Yeaaaah?" She was suspicious and achy from his friendly attack. What did the bimbo want?

"Then you shall bring my midday refreshments to the training ground tomorrow."

"What? Why?"

"Fandral, my friend, has requested I keep an eye on you." Thor laughed at her terrified expression. "And I wish to see how the kin of the greatest swordsman in all asgard fares with a blade."

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Good, tomorrow then." He swished past, cloak trailing behind him carried by a dismissive air, and care-freely neglected to register the woman's questions and worried noises.

"Oh… goodness." Kari squeaked, he couldn't be serious – what was she supposed to do with a weapon?


	8. Chapter 8: A flash of thunder

Morning came with a very annoying ringing sound, the culprit of such noise continued with the added use of a vibrate feature until Karian could take it no more and reached a hand out to find her phone and drag it back to her under blanket lair. Groaning, rubbing her eyes and finally throwing the covers off her she sat up pausing for a loud yawn and scratched behind the ears of a snoozing cat. At least Griffin could sleep in but today was the first day of her new job as an asgardian waitress – she refused to think of it by the title 'server' or 'serving wench' or whatever other names the stupid gods had for it – and that luxury was not a good idea to take. It wouldn't be like back home, her old boss agreeable enough to let her wander in late whenever.

She wasn't really sure what she was supposed to wear in asgard for this job, nobody had actually given her a uniform or anything and the quick training she'd received last night hadn't clarified the matter. Fumbling through a chest of draws, she searched through her 'professional' clothes selection she'd brought with her, finally deciding on some smart looking suit trousers in a black and blue pinstripe, matched with a white blouse with matching blue flower pattern. She should probably tie her hair up as well - without straighteners it was getting increasingly bushy and afro-esk - and throw on some smart looking loafers. Yeah, she looked presentable for earth standards and at least she could run around with ease unlike the other serv- waitresses around the palace in their floor length skirts.

When she arrived in the kitchens, proud of the fact she was early for once in her life, the place was a loud, clattering war zone of cooks and servers piling food onto platters. Not really knowing what to do with herself, by this point, Kari slipped into a corner trying to keep out of everyone's way. Maybe being early was a bad thing after all.

"You!" A woman wearing a splatter covered apron barked from the opposite end of a long wooden table. "New girl! Stop standing around and get these to the dining hall."

"Right!" Kari squeaked back, another server taking pity on her for a moment and handing her a heavy platter of cold meats.

"Follow me." She inclined her head towards the door, Kari obediently following after the redhead like a lifeline. "You are the midgardian are you not?"

"Yup."

"You are not as strange as I thought you would be. But your clothes…" The woman gave her a critical run down. "I am Prue."

"Prue? Uh, Kari."

"When you enter, put the platter down in the centre. Say nothing unless spoken to, even then keep the conversation to a minimum." Prue warned as they came towards the hall entrance. "Someone will try and grab you, the louts like to grope. Try not to react, it only spurs them on. Give them a discreet slap on the hand if they get carried away."

"Woah…" Kari grimaced at the thought of some sweaty hairy man groping her. Sounded like this job was going to be just as bad as children's parties.

Prue was first to the table, placing her platter in the centre in one fluid motion and turning on the spot to fast for any of the bragging men around the table to catch a glimpse of her long enough. Kari's turn, in quickly, platter down, turn and…

"Fandralkin!"

Her eyes went wide as she heard her sort of name being blasted in her ear by a fat and very happy looking Volstagg. There was a high pitched ringing in her head now, followed by a burst of adrenaline focused annoyance as someone gave her rear a good hard slap.

"Is it really?" An equally burly looking man, attached to the hand currently giving her right buttock a good squeeze, gave Volstagg a disbelieving look. "Ah-haha, I recognize that nose! It must be!"

"Yes it is I." Kari gritted out, trying to pull her way out of the iron grip holding her against the table. "But I need to-"

"I told you so, it is true!" Volstagg gave a great belly laugh.

"Come! Sit with us! Eat!" Ass-grabber patted his lap with his free hand. "You are much better to look at than Fandrall."

"No I really need to-"

"Uh-hmmm." Prue was standing behind them now, arms folded with a great effort of annoyance causing the two men to go quiet and start muttering under their breaths.

"Another time, lass." Volstagg became suddenly interested in the meats in front of him.

Finally free from the clutches of asgardian gropers, Kari speed walked after Prue back towards the kitchens. The other woman shook her head with several tutts, finally arcing her head to give her a hard look.

"I told you to give them a slap if they went too far." Prue admonished. "You need to get tough if you plan to remain here."

"Right." Kari shuddered at the thought of that sort of behavior being normal and it was so early in the morning, what would they be like later on when they started drinking? "I'll try harder next time. Ugh, why are they so… like that anyway?"

"They are warriors." She shrugged as if that were answer enough.

The rest of the morning meal went much better, hardly any of the other warriors paid her mind with Prue always just behind her. Apparently, they knew better than to tempt fate with the lip-pursing redhead. She imagined most of the men had been at the receiving end of a good hard slap, from Prue, at some point and soon learned to mind their manners.

After breakfast was over, it was then clean-up time and an early lunch for the kitchen staff. She didn't know how she'd ever get used to her eating schedule being an hour behind for every meal, her stomach already didn't like having to eat lunch when she'd normally wake up late to eat breakfast. The food wasn't quite right either and after living in asgard for the past week and a bit, Kari was really starting to crave a McChicken sandwich.

Griffin had appeared for lunch as well, she had been wandering why he was starting to look a bit fat and now she knew. The tabby-tom had strolled in like he owned the place, hopping up onto a wooden table and been immediately set upon by cooing kitchen staff with offers of various meat. She couldn't help but feel cheated on; he didn't even pay her any mind as his fan-girls swarmed around him giggling at his feline hi-jinks. Whatever, she needed to go and wait hand and foot on a bimbo.

Working along a row of pre-prepared items, she collected up a selection on a tray not really knowing what the prince was into anyway. She was sure he'd like something or everything as asgardian men just seemed to wolf-down whatever was in front of them without regard. Without anyone even noticing she was leaving, too caught up with dangling ribbon for Griffin, Kari slipped out of the kitchens and began the walk down to the training yard. It was just past the stables, a place she dared not visit due to her mild horse-phobia but this time she had to have a good pause and gawk.

A woman with light-brown hair was standing outside brushing down an eight-legged horse. Eight legs. Hallucination or just asgard? Kari swallowed, feeling eyes trained on her and looked back towards the woman, now giving her a bemused frown. She blushed; feeling embarrassed at getting caught staring and tried a friendly smile. The other woman raised an eyebrow at the gesture before turning back to her duty and without anymore incentive Kari rushed on past the stable and into the training yard.

Thor was standing in the centre of the wide-open space, his hammer twirling at an incredible speed in his hand kicking up dust around him. She didn't dare go any closer, least she got sand in her eyes and on his lunch. Just as the swirling dust wall reached the point she could no longer see him through it, he tossed his hammer across the yard and laughed as it collided with a stone target completely destroying it. As he stalked over to retrieve the hammer, Kari took her chance and scuttled across the yard towards the bimbo.

"Oi, Thor?" she called out just as he reached down for his weapon and turned about to face her.

"Fandralkin!" He grinned like a small boy trapped in a man's body. "Is it midday so soon?"

"Kari."

"I know your name." He brushed her annoyance off with a shield of not caring and came over for a closer inspection of what she had brought. "This is fine enough." He took the tray, lifting a hunk of meat and devouring it messily with his hands.

"Oh god…" Kari tried not to puke, then gave a confused look as Thor turned, placing the tray down on a chunk of stone rubble and proceeded to remove his shirt.

He was sweaty, well chiseled abs glistening in the sunlight as he took to wiping his bare skin down with his removed clothing. Kari was wide-eyed in appreciation, refusing to blink for a second as she admired the lovely way his body dipped and curved in just the right places. Damn, even better than that Paul guy.

"Do you see something you like?" Thor's face was a mirror of pure smug as he practically posed for her now, mug of ale held to his lips as he drank giving her ample opportunity to stare at the whole package in one go.

"You have nice abs." She shrugged, her face suddenly portraying an air of disinterest.

"You like me, Fandralkin." He chuckled. "Admit it."

"I appreciate the work you've put in to your physique." She trailed a hand up and down to indicate what he had on display. "You personally? Eh…"

"Eh?" He repeated, smile dropping a fraction at the apparent rejection. "I think you lie."

He turned back to his tray of food and got back to eating like a wild animal. Whatever, she didn't care, or hardly notice, as her eyes remained locked on the well-defined line working down towards his pants. She wasn't sure just how long she had been standing their, practically drooling but there was certainly a change in the prince's body language that became increasingly apparent until he finally cleared his throat to get her to look him in the eyes again.

"I wish you to cease your staring. You look at me like I were a common serving wench." Thor seemed a little annoyed and possibly embarrassed.

"You put it on display." Kari rolled her eyes.

"I care not for your excuses, mortal. I am a prince of asgard and you take care to look at me with some respect."

"Oh gods… alright, you want to feel sorry for yourself then here." She groaned, unbuttoning her blouse and flashing the god of thunder.

He stared, eyebrows raised in some sort of confused, stupefied shock with a chicken leg held in one hand hovering haphazardly near his mouth. That was somewhat unexpected. Out of the blue, Kari pulled her blouse shut again and started crying like a deeply troubled maid just wronged by a prince.

"You… you looked at me… like some common serving wench." She racked out between sobbing shudders.

"You disrobed!" Thor shot back, annoyed at the accusation but also panged with some guilt.

"You didn't have to look!" She broke down into a louder wail. "How could you?"

"I… I…" He opened his mouth several times to say something then finally opted on the better approach. Fandral was going to try and kill him. "Please accept my humblest apologies, Karian Fandralkin. I behaved shamefully. Please, you may look upon me as you wish."

"Really?" She sniffled, wiping away tears on the back of her hands.

"Yes, please, forgive my actions."

"Alright." She looked up, grinning like the Cheshire cat and immediately started laughing at the dumbfounded expression on the bimbo's face.

Oh he was angry at her rouse, but that quickly mutated into a level of impressed annoyance as he shook his head putting his tray of mostly devoured food back on the rubble.

"You are as devious as my brother." He commented with an irritated smirk and headed over to a rack of weapons pulling free two swords. "Now, we shall see how long you remain in such good humor, Frandalkin." He shot her a look that reeked of up-coming payback.


	9. Chapter 9: Cockroach

Body bruised and sore all over, even days after the sparring session with Thor and yet he had been humoring her the entire time mostly letting her knock herself to the ground. She was truly awful with a sword, hardly even able to hold the blade up let alone swing it and block incoming attacks. He had laughed at her profusely, of course, finally letting her go only after he'd gotten bored with teasing the puny midgardian. Really, it shouldn't have surprised her that the gods could be cruel.

Kari spent the next few weeks keeping out of Thor's way, hoping not to get dragged to the training yard again and instead focused on getting to grips with being an asgardian waitress. She was hardly groped anymore, even when Prue was not around, due to her increasing skill at twirling just out of reach and discreetly kicking drunks in just the right way. They really were a wild bunch at dinner time, food would be plastered literally everywhere – up the curtains, on the ceiling, you name it – after they were done and on numerous times she had found herself almost caught in between a pair of playfully wrestling giants. Asgardians knew how to have a strangely good time.

Her clothing had started to somewhat change, becoming a hybrid of both realms as she began to adopt some of the layered tops the other women wore – the floor length skirts were still a no-no. Overall, things were going well enough, she still didn't feel like a real member of asgardian society but perhaps closer to someone on a work visa taking a gap year before returning home. It was an experience, if a little on the boring side when work was over – having no cinema or bar-crawls to go on.

During one of the evening meals, she found herself embarrassingly called down to the head of the table – where Odin, his family and more notable warriors dined. She hadn't been to serve at so high a level before; apparently it was some sort of prestigious position for maidens of some kind of higher birth – and she was definitely getting a death glare or two from the servers in question.

Thor and Odin were enraptured in an animated tale of some horrendously gory sounding battle as she reached them, paying her absolutely no mind, which was fine by her. She was still clutching a jug of ale in her hands, wondering what she was supposed to do or who had called her over when finally Frigga indicated she should come closer. Kari obliged, curving her neck downwards to meet the queen's conspirative whispering.

"I have not seen you in some time." Frigga gave her a reassuring smile. "You look well, dear."

"Uh, yes, thank you." Kari nodded, not sure if this was a social visit or work related one now. "Is there something I can get for you?"

"Yes, I need to ask you to do something for me."

"Anything."

"My youngest son, Loki, has been skipping his meals. Locking himself away in the library again." There was a hint of annoyance mixed with the worry in her tone. "Could you please take him something to eat and tell him he makes his mother sick with worry?"

"I…" She tried not to snort at the last part of the request, instead taking a bite of her lower lip to steady her voice. "Of course. Right away."

"Thank you, Kari." Frigga flashed her another smile then turned back to give her husband and eldest son a perfectly feigned look of deep interest in a story she had heard many times before.

Kari straightened up, walking back across the room towards her usual end of the long dinner table. Prue shot her a worried look, mid-pour of a swaying warriors drink, then placed her jug down and immediately bee-lined for her.

"What happened?" She queried, looking her up and down for signs of something not quite right.

"Frigga wants me to take Loki something to eat."

"The queen asked you too… never mind, some people get all the luck." Prue shook her frown away. "Go easy on the meat, prince Loki does not like to be weighed down."

"Right, thanks." Kari nodded her gratitude for the advice.

The two women parted, the redhead heading back for her jug and Kari heading towards the kitchen. Much like with Thor's tray, she moved along a line of pre-prepared foods about to leave for the warriors seconds but this time took her time to carefully select less stogie foods. All the food groups were taken care of at least and it certainly looked a lot nicer than what she had eaten for her own dinner – though that was not hard when the warriors tended to get more premium provisions than the staff.

Tray of delicacies in hand, Kari wound her way out of the busy kitchen and began the trek towards the library. When she entered, Loki was indeed there milling his way through a book and taking notes on its contents. He didn't even look up as she came closer, pausing besides him and finally placed the tray to his left.

"Your mother says you are making her sick with worry." Kari added a bit of chastising to her tone but couldn't fight the grin spreading across her lips, as he looked up at her with a somewhat befuddled expression.

"Is that not the job of mothers?" He commented darkly, looking over to the tray of snack-sized edibles.

"She wants you to eat something and stop skipping meals."

"Should you not be whispering? This is a library after all."

"Don't be rude."

"Rude? Rude is interrupting someone obviously very busy with their studies to tell them the mundane worries of a mother who has long since seen a babe attached to her breast."

She scowled, what a rude brat this one was, not even grateful in the least that – for some unknown reason – he was actually cared about. There was a rebellious need brewing in the pit of her stomach, their eyes still locked on one another as she turned her gaze down towards the tray of food then looked back at him. He didn't catch on at first, only continuing to glare at her until a movement caught his attention and his eyes widened minutely at the hand heading towards his dinner. Eyes flickering from fingertips and back to her eyes on repeated loop until she paused barely a centre meter from a sausage roll looking item. He watched her, daringly, she wouldn't do it, wouldn't dare pinch a son of Odin's dinner. He was shaking from the anticipation, her grin widening until her cheeks could bare no more and then she striked – a vultures opportunity.

Loki's mouth formed a hard line as he watched her giggling away from him waving the morsel above her shoulder and moved to take a bite. There was a sudden scream as Kari threw the item to the floor and started spitting out what was in her mouth. Loki laughed from his chair, watching with absolute amusement as the would-be-thief kicked out at the pile of transformed cockroaches skidding across the ground after her. A simple spell to frighten a simple creature.


	10. Chapter 10: Another bimbo

Oh he was cruel, god of mischief, she was sure it had been he who shrunk all of her knickers. Kari grimaced as she filtered through a drawer filled with children sized underwear and finally gave up looking for a wearable pair. She'd have to go commando until something could be sorted out – did asgardian women even wear underwear?

All in all, this latest trick probably was closer to her fault than his. She should have let it go after the cockroach incident but he had been so rude about his mother and that just didn't sit well with her. It had taken her a few days to finally convince Prue to help her, directing her towards the prince's rooms and standing guard as she snuck about within. He had looked particularly furious at breakfast the next day with his luscious golden hair – bleach worked quite well on gods and mortals. How he had figured out it was her doing she knew not but the air stank of treachery.

Now the choice was left to her, retaliate or drop it before things got serious. He was playing with her now, she knew that much but things could turn ugly very quickly if the stories the other staff had told her were true. Whatever, she had the next couple of days off, plenty of time to plot her next move.

Going for a wander about the palace, to stretch her legs out, Kari stopped in the garden for a sniff of flowers. Frigga wasn't about today, or at least for the time being but the garden had certainly been tended to recently. She wondered how the queen managed to keep the place looking so attractive at all times. It seemed like there was never a time when the garden wasn't filled with perfect blooms.

Sitting on the bench, beneath a tree, she took out her iPod to listen to a little music. The way her jeans dug into her naked nether-regions made her continually fidget as she sort out a more comfortable way to sit and with that brought up mental imagery of Loki in her room sifting through her underwear. She couldn't help but laugh at the thought; it was creepy, weird but hilarious all in the same instance. What if he'd even stopped to try a lacey number on?

There was a noise barely audible over her headphones, accompanied by a shadow looming over her and an aura of irritation. Kari quit fidgeting; tugging her headphones from her ears and looked up at the green-eyed prince of asgard. How had he known she was thinking about him?

"I asked you a question." His eyes were narrowed, hair black again but the telltale signs of the occasional blond strand still meshed in like highlights. "Where is the queen?"

"Frigga? I don't know." She shrugged.

"How dare you be so familiar." Oh, he was definitely still fuming about the blond locks. "You are aware this is the queen's, personal," he made sure to take his time pronouncing that word, "gardens. It is not a place for the likes of you to come and go as you please."

"Frigga doesn't mind." She rolled her eyes at him, and then yelped as a hand flew across her face knocking her down to her knees.

Kari stared up at him, shocked and held her reddened cheek trying to remember to breathe. He hit her, he actually hit her, was that even allowed? She really didn't like the way he was looking down at her, like scum, a piece of unwanted gum stuck to his boot.

"Go." His voice was low and dangerous, controlled but hinting at a layer of something a kin to mercy.

She got up, unsure of what to say, if there was even anything too say. All she could think about was getting away from him, the pain she was feeling and the utmost desire not to cry in front of him. Something told her, he'd probably like that last bit on some level.

She made her way back to the servant's quarters, dazed, confused and shaking like a leaf. Upon entering her room Griffin looked up from his mid-morning bath and gave a welcoming 'meow' that she couldn't hear. Her ears buzzed with static, her heart thumping loudly as the tears began to roll down her cheeks. She sunk onto the floor, not even having left the door and finally came to the realization there was no way of ever winning a game against Loki.

_

Having felt sorry for herself enough for one day, Kari finally left her room and slinked into the kitchens with a trailing feline friend. She was hungry and lunchtime had been over for a while. Upon entering she noted Prue wiping down some platters in a corner and soon caught the red-haired woman's eyes. She was frowned at, and then the other woman looked deeply troubled and rushed over to the pale looking midgardian.

"Who did that?" Prue was very cross, grabbing Kari's chin and turning her head to the side to get a better look at the hand shaped bruising.

"It's nothing." Kari lied, shaking out of her grip and immediately started to look uncomfortable.

Prue's eyes narrowed but finally relented to the other woman's vow of silence. There was no point in pushing against stubbornness and expecting to win.

"Come with me. We shall put a steak on it." She dragged her across the kitchen, forcing Kari to sit on the edge of a table while she retrieved some raw meat. "This would be better if you came right away. There will be a mark for a few days now."

"Hmmm." Kari looked away apologetically and cringed, as the meat was draped across her cheek. At least it was cool and strangely soothing. "Prue?"

"Yes?"

"Are there places I'm not supposed to go in the palace?"

"Of course." The redhead nodded.

"Like where?"

"You do not know?" Prue frowned then shook her head with a 'tut'. "Of course you do not. Well, the library, the throne room, the observation room, the royal gardens, the training yard, the guards q-"

"Ok, ok, I get it. Nowhere but the servants quarters." She sighed as Prue flipped the steak on her face as if she were a McDonalds grill. "Where exactly am I supposed to go to relax and have some fun then?"

"Outside the palace? The city is full of entertainment."

"I… I can go outside?"

"You are no prisoner, girl." Prue huffed; how could she be so stupid?

After a late lunch, and almost an hour of facing a steak, Kari left the palace for a look around the outside world. The main city was rather busy and terrifying, she didn't know what most of the shops she saw were even selling. Everyone seemed to be a foot or more taller than her, which made for unpleasantness as she kept being bumped into. After a few hours of getting lost and knocked off her feet she finally gave up and walked back towards the palace dusting herself down all the way. Next time she should probably ask Prue or someone else, not that she really knew anyone else, to go with her.

Climbing up the stone steps towards home, she suddenly paused as she neared the entrance to the Bifrost Bridge. There was someone else she kind of sort of knew, she realized and began walking across the dangerous rainbow road. It was beautiful out here, space, stars, and nebulas all above and below her at once. All the other times she had come across the bridge had been in times of stress and she hadn't gotten a proper view of it all before but now…

"Why have you come?" Heimdall, not even looking at her, asked in his deep rumbling voice.

"Just… you know… to say hi." She smiled awkwardly, her lower lip getting a good chewing as he said nothing. "It's really nice out here. Pretty view." She tried again but he just continued to stand there like a statue staring out into space. "You out here on your own all the time? Must be kind of lonely."

"It is my duty." He responded, perhaps in the hope she would give up and go away.

Kari nodded several times, he really wasn't giving away much but maybe it was just a lack of practice thing? She followed his line of sight, looking towards a cluster of lights between two swirls of colour and etched forward to squint at them better. An arm suddenly pressed against her chest, blocking her from taking a further step as she realized – upon looking down – she had been about to step off the side of the bridge.

"Oh…" She hopped back a couple of paces. "I'm guessing falling off the side isn't a good idea then?"

"No."

"Well…uh, thanks for the catch." She chuckled, still as awkward as ever and went right back to chewing her lip. "You don't talk much do you?"

He said nothing; she wasn't really surprised by the fact but had been perhaps a little hopeful. With a questioning look she came closer again, admiring the gold nature of his armor and wondered if it was the real thing. It must be horrendously heavy and he incredibly strong. As she worked her way from his boots to his helmet Kari came to another new realization about her sort of friend – he had very pretty eyes.

"Have your eyes always been that colour?" She asked, this time he turned to look at her giving her a better look and with it a sudden rush of heat to her treacherous cheeks.

"You should return. Fandral looks for you." He spoke the words in his usual monotonous tone then returned to gaze out at the universe.

"I uh…uh…" She trailed off lamely deciding it would be better to just leave now dismissed.


	11. Chapter 11: Green eyes

Heading back towards her room, Kari was suddenly set upon and snatched up by a pair of strong arms twirling her around in a circle. She gasped, feet desperate to find purchase again and squealed until put down.

"Kari, my dear!" Fandral laughed, taking a step back but keeping his hands held to her shoulders. "I have been looking for you."

"Gran- Fandral?" She blinked, surprised and dizzy from all the spinning. So Heimdall hadn't just been trying to get rid of her, how exactly had he even known?

"Come with me, the others are waiting."

"What? Where are we going?" She looked horrified, Fandral about to respond with some glee filled answer but soon frowning into a concerned mask.

"What is this?" He ran calloused fingers, light and gentle along the hand shaped bruise. "Tell me all."

"It's nothing." She tried to pull away but his grip only tightened. "Honestly, it's nothing. Just a stupid accident. It's fine, sorted. Don't worry about it."

His eyes narrowed, fire filled then softened into a layer of sadness before bright and sparkly once more. The transformation was really quite something to witness, perhaps there was a deeper level to her grandfather behind his dashing façade. Without another word on the subject he began coaxing her back through the corridors of the palace with him, heading right towards a forbidden area which made her squirm.

"I can't go in there gramps." She tried to wriggle out of his clutches.

"I thought we agreed there would be no 'gramps'."

"Yes well. I can't go in there, that's one of the observation rooms."

"I am Fandral the dashing and you my kin. Where ever Thor so invites me, he invites you." Fandral laughed, pushing her inside the large immaculately decorated room.

"Fandralkin!" Oh god, it was Thor and he was happy to see her. "Where have you been hiding?"

"Kari! My name is-"

"I know your name." He was on his feet, pouring something into a large mug before handing it to her. "Here! Drink!"

She accepted the mug, if only because he had forced it into her hands and she lacked the choice. The rest of the warriors three and Lady Sif were about the room as well, watching her take a deep swig from her drink before laughing in unison as she coughed and spluttered at the alcoholic strength.

"Too strong for you, lass?" Volstagg hammered his thigh at the amusement.

"I begin to worry if this truly is your kin, Fandral." Thor jabbed the other blond playfully before slumping back into his chair.

"You forget you were too a child once, Thor." Fandral commented, giving his granddaughter a pat on the back for the attempt to drink at least.

"I say he is still such." Sif waded in, Volstagg now turning purple from loud bellowing mirth.

"Laugh all you can, Volstagg. At least I am no old man as you." Thor leaned over, grabbing the man in question in a headlock and proceeding to have a little wrestle.

Kari groaned, muttering something under her breath as she turned to place her mug down on a wooden table. This was exactly the same as all the behavior in the dining hall. Feeling eyes trained on her, she looked to her left noting for the first time a final figure in the room. Loki was there too, sitting on the edge of a balcony and watching her with a look of something unrecognizable – perhaps she was now graduated to an insignificant pebble caught between treads in his under shoes?

"Is this true, Kari?" Fandral asked, she having missed the entirety of the conversation going on between he and the others.

"Huh? Is what true?" She blinked, perplexed.

"It is as I say." Thor gesticulated. "We sparred, blade against blade. She would have made you proud, Fandral."

"Liar! I lost."

"The victory was in the trying." He turned his attention towards her grandfather. "No matter how many times she fell, she kept getting up. Such fierce bravery must be celebrated. By the end I had to forfeit or end her."

"Wait… wait! You're telling me I could have left at any point?" Kari was wide eyed, livid, embarrassed and mildly proud all in one go.

"Of course, I would not force you to fight against your will." He laughed, as if she were telling a strange joke.

"Well, you could have told me that!"

"Thor…" Sif gave him a chastising headshake.

"How was I too know?" Thor shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "The maid was more than able to rebuke I moments before we sparred."

"Yes well." Kari, flushing a light pink as she recalled just what he was speaking about, speedily trying to change the subject.

"Fandralkin put you to shame brother with her twist of words."

"Really?" Loki looked at his brother, unbelieving.

"Uh but enough about that-" Kari gave a huge waitress smile.

"I believe there is something in this story that are friend here is embarrassed to have told." Volstagg began chuckling at the increasing depth of her blush.

"I know not what that could be, Volstagg." Thor creased his brow thinking back on that day's events. "Though perhaps when she-"

"Here, have a drink." Kari pushed her mostly full mug into Thor's reactive hands.

"Ah, thank you Frandalkin, you are too kind." He knocked the beverage back draining the mug in one go. "We should spar again some time."

"Whatever you want." She watched him wiping his mouth dry across the back of his hand, silently praying he'd remain silent.

"You were telling us something, Thor?" Volstagg broke in again.

"I am afraid I have forgotten, my friend." Thor shrugged as if he truly could not remember.

"Stop being so cruel." Sif rolled her eyes at the rabble of men and indicated for Kari to join her towards the back of the room.

Eager to get away, she jumped at the offer and skittered over to sit on a selection of large cushions with the female warrior. The whole day was starting to give her a massive headache and the alcohol in her stomach felt like it was burning the lining away with some gusto. Sif gave her a long curious and knowing look before turning her attention to the gaggle of now arm wrestling boys across the room.

"You are in love. I can tell."

"I'm sorry what?" Kari gave her a wide-eyed look of 'please let me have misheard that'.

"Fear not, most whom meet the prince find themselves infatuated."

"The prince?" She was still lost. "Thor or Loki, are we talking about?"

"Loki?" Sif shot her a wide-eyed, stupefied, 'are you crazy girl' stare. "I am speaking of Thor."

"Oh." She nodded, now understanding what they were talking about. "Oh! No, no, no! Not me!" She really understood what they were talking about. "I promise you, I have absolutely no interest in that bimbo."

"Bimbo?"

"Uh… never mind." She giggled at Sif's lip-pursing expression.

"Then… you are interested in Loki?" The lady warrior gave her a pity filled expression.

"What? No, really I am not interested in either of the princes."

"But there is someone… Volstagg?" She tried again, grabbing at straws now.

"You seriously need to get out and meet other men, girl." Kari was the one to give her the pitiful look now. "There are plenty more fish in the sea besides what's in this room."

"You are no doubt right." Sif began to chuckle. "Then tell me of your love?"

"Uh… well… I wouldn't say he was my love. But… there is this guy I am sort of kind of um… interested in." Kari rolled onto her side, leaning in closer to the other woman so they could conspire without being heard. "Do you know Heimdall?"

"Heimdall? Yes I know him well."

"Oh, that's great. Do you know if he's seeing anyone?"

"I am not aware of anyone, no." Sif's face was a mirror of well practiced neutral. "You are interested in the guardian?"

"Hmmm, yeah. I was talking to him today and… he has really pretty eyes."

"Really pretty eyes?" She nodded, thinking about those words a little harder. "I have not heard those words used when describing my brother before."

"You hav- uh… your… your? Your brother?" Kari's whole body from ears to toes flashed bright red in an instant. "Oh god… please pretend you didn't hear any of that."

"You are embarrassed? You should not be." Sif chuckled at the flustered state of her companion. "It would be good to see my brother forget his duty to pursue other things for a while. Not many show interest."

"Er, that's er…" Kari began chewing her lips in alternating fashion. "I really wouldn't get your hopes up."

"Nonsense. You are young, attractive, you have captured Thor's attention." She indicated the god of thunder, currently tossing Fandral over his shoulder, with her elbow. "My brother would have to be stupid not to show some interest."

"He certainly didn't show much interest today. Barely got three words out of him."

"That is just his way. Keep trying, Fandralkin."

"Not you too. Kari, my name is Kari."

Embarrassment aside, the two women continued to chat longer on other subjects until rudely interrupted by Thor attempting to win a bet by lifting both the women above his head at once. He'd lost, obviously, because Sif didn't take too kindly to the manhandling and ended up getting into a fistfight with him. Kari had tried drinking some of the alcohol again, this time taking it slowly and managing to finish a whole mug as the others recounted tales of daring adventures for her pleasure. It wasn't so bad really, they were a fun lot when not poking at her but it still wasn't the same kind of fun as getting crazy at a nightclub. Yeah, she really missed earth still.

The gathering had gone on pretty late into the night, at some point she had finally fallen asleep from a mixture of exhaustion and drunken bliss and awoken against her grandfather's shoulder. Fandral was having a somewhat dull conversation with Hogun, the grumpy one of the warriors three, about dwarves and weapon smithing. It was a pretty one sided conversation with Hogun only grunting now and then at what Fandral was saying but the bit about dwarves sounded interesting. There were dwarves? Actual living breathing, 'hi-ho' dwarves in asgard? Why had she not seen them before?

Sif retired to bed first, followed by a laughing Volstagg and Thor until finally Fandral and Hogun were done speaking metallurgy. The two men rose, Fandral pausing to help his half asleep granddaughter to her feet with a stretch and yawn. The three were leaving when something made Kari and Fandral pause their escape.

"Kari?" Loki called out, striding from the balcony into the main room. "May I speak with you a moment?" He looked suddenly to her wary grandfather. "I promise, there is no trick in this."

"If you say, Loki." Fandral studied him, then looked down to Kari for her nod of agreement. "Very well. Behave yourself trickster."

Fandral took his time leaving the room with an added look back at the pair before finally exiting. Loki waited for the warrior's footsteps to fade in the corridor before he moved closer until barely a foot away from the apprehensive midgardian. There was a layer of silence, punctuated by their stares – green and blue meeting with a mutual mistrust and mystification.

"You told them not what I did?" He finally asked, gaze now following the outer line of bruising on her cheek before snapping back to her eyes.

"No." she whispered, looking to the side in hurt embarrassment before snapping back to green much as he had done.

"You could have." He paused. "You should have." He continued, a hand reaching out to greet the mark he had left on her skin. "May I?"

"What? Slap me again?"

"No." He chuckled; eyes alight with a genuine humor mixed with something else almost wild. "May I remove this stain?"

His hand began to spark and glow dimly as he neared her face, finally his palm sliding across the perfect copy with a gentle persuasion. His touch tingled, heating the skin and cooling the dull ache of the bruise, as their eyes remained locked. When he finally pulled away she almost wished that he hadn't, swallowing back the built up saliva in her mouth and palming the side of her face no longer feeling any pain.

"Gone." He smirked at her wonder.

"Thank you." She blinked in the realization that this was perhaps an apology of sorts. "While you're at it, fixing what you broke, could you please make my underwear the same size again?"

"Your… undergarments?" He gave her a perfect façade of mystified innocence. "I am afraid I know not what you speak of."

"Hmm, oh I think you do."

"I promise you, honestly, I know nothing of what may have transpired involving your personal garments."

"Liar."

"That is quite the accusation." His smile had returned. "Tell me, do you perchance know how my hair was altered recently?"

"No, I can't say that I do." Kari mimicked his earlier look of innocence – though in her opinion she did it better.

"Very well. I bid you good night, Fandralkin." Loki brushed past her, leaving her knowingly seething at her asgardian title.

That night, Kari went to bed mildly drunk and aggravated at the final note of the evening. The god of mischief never seemed to stop even when he sort of, kind of, seemed to be apologizing for something, maybe. She finally fell asleep - purring ball of fluff draped over her hip above blankets – and drifted into a truly pleasant dream about Heimdall. Except, something about the dream was a little confusing, the hue of his pretty eyes. Why had they been green?


	12. Chapter 12: I won't say I'm in love

Waking up the next afternoon, eyes blurred and dry, Kari had a magnificent hangover that seemed to be residing mostly in her stomach. Groaning, she kicked the knotted covers off and stumbled onto the cold floor pausing to hold back a prison break from her innards. She needed to get to the bathroom and quickly before she made a post-asgardian ale mess all over the place.

The communal washroom had been empty when she finally made her way within – the perfect time for a long, soul-scrubbing soak in a tub. The warm water was really nice, soothing the general ache and turmoil throughout mind and body. Her thoughts wandered around without rhyme or reason, pausing at peculiar stops and retrieving pieces of conversation for sorting. Kari frowned as she recalled something she hadn't taken notice of the night before – had Sif really said Thor had taken an interest in her? In what way? They were discussing romance so…

"Oh god." She ducked under the water as if drowning was the only way to escape such a cringe worthy turn of events. She shouldn't have flashed him in the training yard.

Breaking out from the surface of the water, she gasped for air having held her breath a little longer than was necessary. There was no point in wallowing anymore; she was starting to get pruny and who knew where her thoughts would lead her to next.

She got out of the tub, searching for her towel before trekking back toward her room and ignoring the way a passing asgardian followed her with his eyes. There wasn't usually any men hanging around the servants quarters, most males that worked within the palace residing in the barracks or private rooms, so she'd never thought twice about just walking through the corridor in nothing but a towel before. The way he was looking at her certainly made her think twice about it now, though it was amusing when he walked into a suit of armor and collapsed under its weight. She shouldn't have laughed, it was cruel and he looked so shamefully embarrassed but what was done was done, she thought as she slipped back into her room for clothes.

Another day off to do what she wanted. What did she want to do? Throwing on a pair of grey leggings and a green tunic, she began wondering about the rest of her conversation with Sif – the bit before Thor. Heimdall, she practically swooned on the spot at the thought of his pretty eyes. His sister had suggested continuing to try but she needed an excuse to go visit him, one besides the lame excuse from yesterday.

Looking in the mirror, trying to sort out her damp curly hair into something other than a mess, an idea came to mind. She recalled packing a few art supplies before leaving earth, another of her whims from a left over pile of birthday presents she'd received years ago. At some point in her life, probably closer to pre-pubescence, she vaguely recalled receiving gold stars on several occasions for her 'imaginative' pictures of multi-coloured stuff that may or may not have been various animals. It had been something she thought about a few times over the years, getting back to drawing as it had probably been the only class at school she hadn't out right failed.

It was worth a shot, two birds, one stone. Dragging her case out from under the bed, she searched the compartment on the side for a sketchpad, pencils and oil pastels – they'd do for drawing that amazing view from the bifrost. Items under arm, Kari, trekked down to Heimdall's lookout, he hardly seemed to notice her upon arrival but that had been expected. He was watching a different spot from yesterday, a great big swirling blue patch with freaky looking black bits. She inhaled, exhaled her dislike of the area as it gave her the creeps for some unknown reason.

"You really like looking at the view, huh?" She grinned at the golden guardian, he saying absolutely nothing and so she took a seat on the ground placing her items around her. "Sif says you're her brother?" She continued trying to make small talk. "You don't seem very alike though. I mean… she talks a lot more and… is a woman." Ok that was a stupid thing to say.

Suddenly mortified of her own, running away mouth, she decided to stop talking for the moment and instead concentrate on her art. How did this all work again? Pick a spot and drawn, she thought, searching the sky for a nice bit of starry, colour-filled wonder. Focusing on a pinkish-red nebula, Kari opened up the first page of the sketchpad and plucked up a wine coloured pastel from the pack. It really wasn't as easy as she remembered it being, her lip getting a brutal chewing as she tried desperately to work the colours into something pseudo-nebula-esk.

"What are you doing?" The low rumbling voice startled her into dropping the pad into her lap.

"Oh, uh… trying to, you know… draw the scenery." She waved a haphazard arm toward her point of interest.

"That is midgard." He was staring at the mess of colours, upside down, on her lap.

"It is?" She tilted her head one way and then the other trying to figure out how he was seeing her home world in possibly the worse piece of art she'd ever seen in her life. "Well that's good to know, I thought it was just a really bad mess."

He went silent again, his gaze returned to the stars and possibly now looking at midgard if her calculations were right. Maybe he knew what was going on back home? She should probably ask him but… damn did he have pretty eyes.

Flipping the page in her book over, she placed the pastels back in their pack and this time selected a pencil. He was standing so still, his expression a perfect mirror of stony wonder – or so she liked to think. He was so close and yet so far away; her hand started to react to her line of sight, a head forming on the page, a nose, his mouth - those eyes. She was biting her lip again, but this time it wasn't in concentration; Heimdall captured in graphite was flowing out of her fingertips with such ease she found herself lost sketching him one after the other with steady improvement. It wasn't until he spoke again that she even realized he was looking at her once more.

"It is late." He commented; his eyes focused on her as if for once seeing nothing else around him. "You should return."

"But I just got here?" She gave him a confused look.

"You arrived hours ago." He gave a short burst of laughter, it was like music to her ears that made her blush a bashful crimson until disappointed when he turned to watch the universe.

She closed her sketchpad, collecting up her things and stood stiff and sore from having sat on the ground so long. Now she thought about it, she was pretty hungry; perhaps it had been hours as he said. With a shy farewell, Kari turned on her heels and began the long trek across the bridge and back to the palace. Oh, that had been a fun day and a wonderful excuse to spend time with Heimdall.

Entering her room, she giggled at a miss mash of thoughts involving the guardian and placed her art supplies on her bed. An idea had occurred to her as she searched her room for something sticky but in the end resorting to pins in order to post her Heimdall sketches on her wall. It was the beginning of a beautiful wall collage - a reasonable alternative when unable to buy posters or take super secret photos of her hearts desire.

As she pulled away to admire the images, there was a curt 'meow' from the open window that shocked her from her reverie. Griffin stared at her, a knowing look flashing across his gaze as he washed his face. She scowled at the cat, 'tuting' at his opinion and rolled her eyes putting her things away.

"It's not like that." She remarked." Don't give me that look. It's just a harmless crush."

Griffin paused his cleaning, tongue sticking out between his teeth as he blinked his confusion at her. What had he said to make her so upset? She looked up at him, sticking her own tongue out in a rude gesture and followed it with a pulled face. He mewed softly his accusation, which only made her roll her eyes.

"I'm not lying." She retorted to her feline husband. "I'm going to get some dinner, why don't you come and see your fancy women?"

She moved towards the door, Griffin pouncing down from the windowsill with an excited response. She couldn't help but laugh at the way their communication seemed to work, scratching the tabby-terror behind an ear before walking out into the corridor.


	13. Chapter 13: Does everybody know?

Back at work the next day there was a pair of eyes following her every move over breakfast. It was disconcerting to say the least but certainly not the first time one of the warriors had enjoyed looking – though to a lesser intensity. It continued through lunch, dinner and for several days until finally she had no choice but to pour the man a drink one night. He hadn't said a word, only stared at her longingly in a shy manner, his cheeks a heated colour no doubt from the alcohol. She brushed past his arm, his pupils dilated dangerously like a lovesick puppy and she knew she had to get away from this man very quickly indeed.

Walking back towards the kitchens she heard her sort of name being called from somewhere behind and paused looking over her shoulder. A frown soon creased her brow as the asgardian swayed towards her, having built up enough liquid courage no doubt.

"Fandralkin? That is you, yes?"

"Hmmm?" She was wary, trying to catch Prue's eye as the other woman passed them in the corridor.

"Egill, I am Egill." He was rocking on his feet, cheeks dangerously purple but his eyes trained and focused with precision. "We have met before. You were wet."

"Right." She bit her lip then stared at him disbelieving. "Oh, you're that guy that walked into the armor!"

"Yes!" He laughed, clearly relieved that she recalled him. "My gaze was so enraptured by your garment I am afraid I made a fool of myself."

"Hmmm." She nodded through a rapidly draining chuckle. "Is there… something I can do for you, Egill? More ale?"

"No! No. I," he was flustered again, was he really a warrior? "only wished to speak with you, Fandralkin."

"Kari. My name is Kari."

"Kari." He practically sighed in the name as if savoring it for later. She'd only given it because she hated being called after her grandfather but Egill had some how taken it another way.

"I… should be going." She gave a worry filled laugh hoping he'd catch the gist and go away. "Work to do."

"Yes, of course, Kari." Oh god, now he was going to be saying her name around as if waving a trophy.

Scampering away she inwardly cringed at her inner prey mentality picking up the static shock of eyes continuing to watch her. She made sure to take her time in the kitchen, filling up her jug of ale before returning with another server to the dining hall. Egill was sitting back in his seat, a pleased look on his face as he merrily ate taking occasion to look up over his meal for a loving stare. Right, this was all she needed, an asgardian warrior crushing on her whilst she crushed on a workaholic mute.

As the days wore on, turning into weeks and even a couple of months, she was really starting to get tired of all the courting. Gifts kept appearing outside her room, strange, asgardian gifts. At first she had returned them to Egill but he only seem to take this as a sign she did not like what he had sent and would leave instead something bigger and better the following day. Next she tried accepting the gifts which then spurred him into thinking she was interested. At another point she tried asking Heimdall his opinion, hoping her crush would suddenly man up and go protect her from the big bad stalker but he had instead politely suggested she tell the warrior her lack of interest in him. Kari reluctantly agreed with his idea, though the pang of hurt at the guardian's dismissiveness had caused her to begin questioning what was or could ever be between them.

She staked out her own room, waiting for the point Egill arrived with a bouquet of ridiculously nice looking flowers. He looked so happy; it broke her heart to do what she did next. Jumping out on him, he was momentarily surprised then grinning like a teenager as he presented the aromatic selection to her. She accepted them, reluctantly, if only to be polite.

"Egill… we need to talk." She began in her best, it's not you, it's me, voice.

"Kari." He whispered her name, caressing her ears with his intense affections.

"Look, you seem like a nice guy but… I'm not interested."

"There is another?"

"Nooooo…" She shrugged, trying to be as truthful as possible. "Not really anyone, I'm just not interested in this."

"The gifts?"

"The gifts and any of it." She was chewing her lip; break ups were always the worse things in the world, especially when the one getting dumped looked so damn depressed about it. "I'm sure there's someone else who would gladly love to have your attentions."

"No, I…" He trailed off, apparently thinking harder about her words. "I believe I understand. No more gifts."

"No more gifts." She smiled; relieved he was finally getting it.

"You are a hard maid to win, but Egill likes a challenge." His face broke out into a chipper grin. He hadn't got it.

What was she supposed to do with an asgardian that couldn't take no for an answer? Run seemed like the best option, as fighting him wasn't really a choice. Currently her worst fear wasn't going into work and having him make goo-goo eyes at her or attempt to fight any of the other warriors that showed an interest but that at some point he'd no doubt wear her down. It had happened before back on earth, a customer at the restaurant that came every other day for weeks, sitting at the same table, tipping her like crazy and asking her out until she had finally said yes. That had not ended well; the moment he got what he wanted he became instantly disinterested and no longer returned her calls. She'd been heartbroken – how could he? Was Egill the same level of cruel?

Having just returned from the bifrost, a satchel filled with her latest Heimdall pictures now in colour, she hadn't been expecting her unwanted suitor to discover her so soon. She was tired, too tired for this and so immediately began running through the palace corridors the moment he'd shouted out her name. Oh how he loved to use her name at every given chance. She could hear his footfalls behind her, catching up slowly but surely but at least all the running away had began to increase her cardiovascular abilities – she could keep up a faster pace for longer periods now. She had to find somewhere to hide and upon rounding a corner a somewhat unexpected place of sorts made itself apparent.

"Fandralkin!" Thor exclaimed as she ran towards him and then stopped suddenly with a desperate disheveled appearance.

"Hide me!" She begged, ducking under his long red cloak and trying desperately to remain very still.

The prince was about to question, his face a curious assortment of intrigued amusement but the answer made himself apparent before another word could be uttered.

"Kari, my love!" Egill appeared, eyes longingly searching out his missing quest item. "Odinson! Thor! Tell me, have you seen a fair maiden pass this way?" He was desperate, pleading; it was almost pitiful if Thor didn't find the entire situation hilarious.

"That I have friend." The god of thunder scratched his beard, worrying Kari into thoughts of treachery. "A particularly fine looking maid turned and passed down that way," his finger pointed down an adjacent corridor, "towards the gardens not a moment ago."

"Thank you friend." Egill clapped his fellow warrior stoutly on the shoulder then took off at another run calling for his love.

The moment she could no longer here his shouts, Kari appeared from under the smug looking bimbo's cloak with a deeply relieved sigh. She could tell she'd end up owing him something, like a spar or back rub.

"A friend of yours?" His tone reeked of cheekiness.

"What do you think?" Kari muttered. "He won't leave me alone. I've tried dissuading him every way I can possibly think but he just won't let up… or stop groping my butt." She subconsciously rubbed her behind at the memory.

"Ah, but what man would not wish to feel such a pleasant looking posterior in his grip." He laughed at her mortified expression then clapped her over the shoulder reeling her in with a friendly tug. "Come now, be not so grey faced. Tell me how your courting of Heimdall goes?"

"What? How did you… Sif?" She was wide-eyed, her mortified expression now petrified.

"Do not blame the lady, it was not she who told your secret." Thor's face was more wolfish grin than features. "It was not difficult to notice your many visits to the guardian. I also here tell of a great wall of paintings in his honor."

"Oh god…" She palmed her face, trying to hide from the truth, the collage information was probably Prue's doing – nothing ever stayed quiet for long with her. "Everybody knows?"

"Of course."

"Does Heimdall know?"

"He would have to be blind and Heimdall can see to the end of time and back." Thor chuckled as her face reddened; she was definitely not going to see the guardian for a few days now she knew he knew.


	14. Chapter 14: Horrible

Admirer still in tow, Kari searched out her grandfather to see if he could be of help – that's what family was for, right? Her hope was, perhaps, Fandral would challenge the lovesick idiot to a duel or some other noble rubbish to protect his granddaughter's honour. They were into that sort of thing in asgard she assumed, what with all the bragging and songs of dead ancestors. Her last chance savior was not so much a white knight, however, Kari having finally located the overly slippery and much to pretty for his own good, cad. She'd walked in on him, with someone, or two someone's, she wasn't really sure it was a tangle of limbs and her eyes immediately began to burn.

"Oh my god, granddad!" She screamed, covering her eyes. "Lock the door!"

There was squealing, followed by giggling and rushed apologies within but she was already out the door trying to rub the image out of her pupils. She wasn't even sure why she was surprised, he was a playboy and she hardly ever saw him even when he wasn't off on some ludicrous quest. What had her grandmother ever seen in him? Maybe it was the moustache – god did she hate moustaches!

The door besides her scraped open, Fandral draped in a bed sheet closing it behind him as he watched her desperately trying to wipe the telltale signs of tears from her eyes. She refused to look at him at first, trying to reason out in her head what she was actually upset about and finally settled on one of two things.

"Kari, my dear." He reached out a hand to place on her shoulder, not really sure whether to chastise her lack of knocking or not.

"Don't you "my dear" me!" She shrank out of his touch. "Your horrible! You're all horrible but especially you! How many children have you even fathered? With how many god damn women? I don't know even if the next person I speak to is my cousin or aunt or some shit! Do you even know?"

"This is not the place for this conversation." He was looking somewhat fierce but that was more the hurt he was receiving with every word blow.

"I don't give a fuck!" She screamed at him, angry but then as suddenly deeply sad; her arms rising up to meet the tilt of her head as she sobbed through a cascade of tears. "I don't even know who you are. Did my grandmother even know who you were? My mother sure as hell didn't know who you were. Was it all just a notch on your belt? Did you care? Did you even look back? Do you know how much you hurt them? What did it mean? What do they in that room mean? What are any of us too you? What am I to you?"

She found herself slipping, the inner turmoil catching up like an unpaid loan and crippling her. Before she reached the ground arms were around her, strong safe arms pulling her back up to her feet and folding her close against him. She cried, hard, unable to stop herself from covering his chest in a stream of salty tears but he only squeezed her tighter as she shook against a childhood deep sorrow working its way out.

"I lied."

"What?" He was surprised when she finally spoke again, not really registering what she initially said.

"I did know my father."

"Was he like myself?"

"No." Her grip tightened on his chest, digging into the skin roughly. "My mother wasn't a nurse either. She just used to say… say she was 'taking care' of people." She closed her eyes fighting back a new rush of misery as her mothers voice replayed in her mind, 'Not now baby, I'm taking care of someone'. "I used to think it was strange that she only ever took care of men," it was his turn to tighten his grip now, "but my father would get so mad at her if she wasn't 'taking care' of them. They were always fighting." She bit her lip as a new memory flashed behind her eyelids – colouring in a picture of a giraffe that she'd get a gold star for next day at school, pretending not to hear or see daddy smacking mummy around. "Then one day, mother says we're going away somewhere. "Be a good girl and put on your coat. Don't wake daddy he's sleeping." And we're in the car; I'm showing her my picture that I got a gold star on. I was so proud but she was busy trying to start the engine. Then he's standing there in his underwear, I remember laughing because I thought it was so funny not even noticing he was holding a hunting rifle and pointing it straight at mother. He kept telling her to stop playing stupid and get out the car but it was like she was frozen. I called to her, she breathed and slammed her foot on the accelerator. I couldn't stop staring at her, even when we hit the wall. There was blood, so much blood, all over me, her, everything. I don't remember screaming or moving. I think I just sat there looking at her until they cut me out the car."

Fandral shuddered, she wasn't sure if it was the angry or sad kind, she couldn't look him in the eyes. They were both silent, contemplative, Kari wondering if she should have even told him that. The lie would have made him happy forever, but on the same token a part of her wanted to hurt him and give him a piece of the misery he'd left behind. Was she evil for wanting that? Maybe it was just what being family meant, sharing burdens and being honest.

"Is he dead?" His words were icy, filled with a vengeful promise.

"Very dead." She croaked having to swallow several times to remoisten her parched throat. "It's not easy to survive having your head cracked open and a car impaling you."

"Good." He stated matter-of-factly, pulling back from her long enough to plant a kiss on her forehead before reeling her in once more. "As for Francesca, all that I can say is, I am truly sorry."

"Hmmm." Kari pushed away from him, realizing for the first time it was not her apology to hear. "I… I should go. It's late. Sorry I… Next time I'll knock."

Another day, another game of hide and seek from Egill but at least today – despite the depressive nature of the night before – it felt as if a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She almost didn't mind at first, when her suitor had come up behind her with a morning greeting and buttock pat. That was short lived, however, especially when he started talking about marriage. Oh was she running for her life now.

Round a corner, through a storeroom, up a pillar to the next floor balcony. She was getting really quite good at surprising feats of athleticism. Thor had bellowed with laughter as she climbed into a room he was occupying, hair somewhat of a mess and stopping to drink his cup of wine to show him who was boss. So in the know he didn't even require explanation to her activities, promising to tell her suitor she had flown away back to midgard if asked. There was a nagging sensation, somewhere toward the conspirative side of her brain, which was slowly starting to believe Thor was possibly stirring things at either end but such deviousness was more commonly associated with his brother. She was sure Loki wouldn't have gotten involved though, to beneath his radar, and dually hopefully wasn't in the library.

Ducking inside the god of mischief's favourite lair, having heard Egill on her tail again, she tiptoed discreetly into the maze of bookshelves. It wasn't hard finding a good hiding place, tucked away into an alcove and blocked from view by a collection of horribly dusty looking tomes. She sat on the ground, pulling her knees tight against her as she caught her breath and tried to be very quiet. Hopefully Egill wouldn't come in, head straight pass thinking she wouldn't dare go inside and perhaps search for her in the dining hall during dinner like he usually did.

The library was silent, except for a distant sounding whispering of a conspirative nature. Kari creased her brow, removing a book from the shelf behind her to remove an obstacle between herself and the words she was half hearing. It sounded like Loki, he was speaking to someone but that someone didn't seem to be speaking back. She strained her ears harder, desperately trying to pick up every little sound until more began to ring clear.

"-not too big." He was saying. "It will look accidental I assure you… Perhaps… Just coax it toward the spot and let nature run its course… No… You are as wonderful as ever… Yes… Very well…"

There was a light pop, a static noise she hadn't even been aware of at first, sucked out of the air as the conversation ended. He must have been using some sort of magic, perhaps, creating something like a telephone to communicate? But with whom and about what? Realizing she was suddenly very vulnerable, trapped in the library with a plotting Loki, Kari rapidly replaced the books she had removed onto the shelf and went rigid trying to even keep her breathing to a minimum in order to avoid detection.

He was walking around now, the tap, tap, tap of his boots going down a row of shelves before pausing to retrieve a book. She could hear him flicking through the pages, clearly not having found what he needed and sliding the tome back into place before the tap, tap, tap began again, inching closer to her location. He stopped several times along his way, each time retrieving a book then replacing it moments later. What was he looking for? She certainly hoped he'd find it sooner rather than later.

Finally, he turned into her line of shelves with that tap, tap, tap, of doom inching closer and closer. Her heart was thudding in her ears, face turning a reddish blue colour as she refused to breathe. He paused, a book was removed from the shelf to her left, pages turned and then put back. He should have started to leave at this point, like the other times, should have began to tap, tap, tap, away but there was only silence. She needed to breathe, was desperate to take in some oxygen before she passed out. In a final bid for hope of escape she looked up hoping to see him round the edge of her hiding place about to leave but gasped greedily at the air instead.

He was standing there, looking down at her with a new expression she had not seen before. Apparently she had lost her graduation cap and completely de-evolved down to poop under his shoe now.

"I know I'm not supposed to be in here." She was talking faster than she thought capable. "And I wasn't eavesdropping I swear!" He continued to stare at her saying nothing; it was easier to have her incriminate herself. "Look I have a perfectly reasonable excuse. You see there's this guy and he won't stop chasing me around so I ran in here hoping to-"

"Enough of your petulant whining." He hadn't even said it loudly but her ears felt his words like a level 10 shockwave. "I care not of your insipid plight."

"I'll just go then." She got to her feet, hoping to make a speedy retreat around the green-eyed monster.

"Will you?" He was standing in her way, his tone so cold she could feel the air around her freezing from his will alone.

He was going to kill her. That feeling rang true in every bone throughout her body like the inescapable clutches of death his or her self.

"My love?" Egill burst into the library calling for her, she in turn instinctively pressing herself back into her hidey-hole. "Ah, Loki, my friend, have you seen a maiden pass this way?"

"Very few enter the library, as you well know, even less are of the maiden variety." Loki sounded pleasant, a stark difference from only a moment a go and he was hiding her too. Suspicious.

"Of course, of course." Egill laughed, the general air of sexism was hardly new to her ears in asgard. "I shall leave you to your studies."

"That would be greatly appreciated. I have much t-"

"Egill! I'm here!" Kari dashed out from her hiding place, brushing past a now scowling Loki and into the warriors eagerly waiting arms.

"My love! You have come to me at last!" Egill was so ridiculously happy he began shedding tears of joy as he lifted her above his head much to her horror. "What trick was this Loki?"

"No trick." The prince falsely grinned. "The lady wished not to be found. Or so she claimed."

"You lie." Egill was annoyed, pulling his love protectively to his side.

"Oh I think not." That iciness was back again, but he was also amused, she could tell by the twinkle of mischief in his eye.

"Whatever, I need to get out of here." Kari muttered, trying desperately to get out of Egill too eager clutches and away from Loki's wrath.

All in all, this wasn't going to end well no matter what she did.


	15. Chapter 15: This family thing

Of course she'd chosen life, though when forcibly attached at the hip to a smoochy-faced asgardian it hardly seemed better – a fate worse than death. He was rattling on, something about how he wanted more children than she could possibly bare without exploding, but she wasn't really listening. Oh how she wished Heimdall would come and rescue her from this – and stop playing hard to get. As he dragged her through the palace, not even caring where they were headed, she looked up just in time to give a dejected wet kitten face at Prue who was waiting by the kitchens looking rather cross at her. An exchange of predicament, the redhead's brow softening, as she comprehended the situation and dropped folded arms to storm like only Prue could towards them.

"Egill!" There was a head turning 'thwack' that stunned both the warrior and his prize - though only one of them had received the strike. "How many times does that child have to tell you 'no' before it will get through that thick skull of yours? And now you make her late for service. That reflects on the rest of us, on me. Now listen here, you gelatinous oaf, put her down or by Odin's great burly beard I will feed you too the frost giants myself!"

Kari was unceremoniously dropped, her knees blocking the fall with a teeth chattering hiss of discomfort. Oh, Prue was so her hero. How had that even worked? The answer to her question becoming suddenly very apparent as she peered up, noting the look of love in the warrior's eyes but now directed at the furious looking server. It would have upset her, his wandering affections, had she not wanted so desperately to get away from it.

"Come, girl." Prue helped her back onto her feet, turning sharply and dragging the other woman towards the kitchens without so much as a backwards look.

After that, Egill never so much as thanked her for pouring his ale, eyes constantly focused on the lip pursing female menace of asgard. He'd even started leaving strange asgardian gifts for his new interest, though unlike her, Prue genuinely seemed to be enjoying the attention and took every instance to show off her latest bauble around the kitchen. It was a match made in heaven – or asgard – and with it came such a tremendous relief Kari had almost forgotten completely about Loki and his plotting. Would the god of mischief retaliate?

She was suddenly a lot more wary, jumping at the slightest sounds of an unusual nature and constantly checking her underwear draw for signs of tampering. Days went by and nothing. The waiting felt crueler than the act could ever possibly be, though maybe that was Loki's point – let her stew in it before finally releasing his surprise. Opposite side of the same coin, what had he been plotting in the library that day? Maybe his other plans should have been of more concern to her and dually why he hadn't pranked her yet – too caught up in other mischief.

It was just after lunch, Kari busily sweeping up shards of smashed cups and glassware from the floors of the dining hall when Thor had began looming over her. She thought she was in trouble for something at first, perhaps Loki related but that turned out not to be the case – at least not entirely. The bimbo was frowning, worried with arms held tight on his hips as he sort out words to say. Righting herself, a pan full of debris in her hand she gave him a questioning look as if to spur his wits into a greater fervor.

"Thor?" she tried, he wasn't actually looking at her but instead staring thoughtfully at the walls. "Odinson?" She tried again, this time his head swiveling to meet her gaze.

"I am deeply troubled, Fandralkin." He finally began then stopped once more.

"It's Kari." She muttered to herself then slipped on her too big waitress smile. "Is there something I can do to help with that?"

"I believe so, friend." There it was, the shoulder slap of friendship and along with it her lurching to the side and dropping her dustpan of fragments. "I need for you too speak with your kin and convince him to give up his fool errand."

"My kin? Fandral?" she wasn't really sure what the prince was going on about but he did seem genuinely affected. "What's he up to?"

"He has forsworn his philandering ways and declared a vow of celibacy." Thor was scowling; apparently this was a ridiculously bad thing. "I have been inundated with maids from all over the nine realms begging to have this wrong put right." That definitely sounded like an over-exaggeration. "I may be a god but I am still only one man. How can I possibly restore such balance to all the women of the realms alone? He is Fandral the dashing, not Fandral the dull. Help me talk some sense into him, Fandralkin. For Asgard and all that weep for his return to glory."

"Sooo… what you're telling me is," Kari's face was a mirror image of the words, 'not buying it' by this point, "your wingman has gone and gotten morals and now you don't have anybody to score chicks with on the weekend."

"I do not understand your analogy, mortal." But he did seem to understand her tone if his mild embarrassment was anything to go by. "Will you help me or not?"

"I don't know what you think I can do?"

"He thinks very highly of you, Fandralkin. Also, he had mentioned some disagreement you two were engaged in just before his vow."

"Oh, so you think this is my fault now?"

"I did not say that."

"But you implied it." Why was she so annoyed? It probably actually was her fault after that bombshell she just detonated on the poor guy the other night. "Ugh, fine. But I have work to do right now so later."

"I am indebted to you, friend." He was beaming like a small child, practically bursting at the seams with hope filled joy as he gave her another whack on the shoulder and strode away leaving her to clean up the mess he'd helped create.

The next conversation she had with Fandral had started better than any of the previous others – now there were no more secrets between them, she supposed. He was drunk when she arrived at his rooms and his lips were very loose indeed as he recounted tales of a wife he had once had called Marian. The entire story had sounded suspiciously like the tale of Robin Hood, as he laid out all the details, but something in it still rang of truth so she saw no reason to question it.

As she moved onto her second glass of wine, her own lips began to loosen as somewhat similar tales began to surface from her past. A string of boyfriends that for the most part had deserved better from her, the odd occurrence of one night stands and finally a drunken tear filled realization the only one she'd ever loved being her cat. He'd laughed at that confession, his sense of humour returning to him swiftly as they talked through the night.

"I believe you have inherited more than just my eyes, my dear." Fandral leaned forward from his chair, refilling her cup despite her less than enthusiastic headshake at the offer.

"Who could forget the nose?" She turned her head to the side and pointed at the appendage, he mimicking the same before they both burst out laughing.

"It is a curse to so easily fall in love." He sighed whimsically.

"Hmmm." She nodded, sipping on her fourth or fifth drink of the evening. "Better than the curse of being constantly in a bit of a mood like Loki."

"Loki?" He was puzzled how the conversation had moved from love to Loki in such a short leap. The two hardly seemed compatible. "The trickster. What is between you two, Kari?"

"Between us?" She paused to choke on wine caught in her throat. "Nothing between us I assure you! I'm interested in Heimdall."

"I had heard tell of that. You know his duty will always be his first love, my dear. I would forget about the guardian if I were you."

"But… Hmmm." She left her comment hanging in purgatory, eyes glued to her distorted reflection at the bottom of her cup; her grandfather was right, it was a going-no-where-fast relationship just like the ones she'd pursue in her old life. Maybe that was it, he was the guardian of the bifrost, a link between her birthplace and asgard – no wonder he was so appealing. "Thor wants his wing man back. He looked a right state earlier when we spoke. You need to cheer him up, gramps, go do whatever it is you do in asgard that involves alcohol and women."

"I have taken a vow-"

"I know, I know. Sorry if I had anything to do with that." She paused to down the last of her wine, liquid courage fueling the relaxation of her mind. "Besides, it might be nice to have some aunts and uncles. Your not so bad, this family thing's not so bad."

"Your approval of me is most cherished." He laughed, the jug of wine held up in his grip inviting her to have another.

"Oh… just one more, but this is the last, I have work tomorrow." She offered up her cup accepting the crimson aroma he poured.


	16. Chapter 16: Monster

Loki was swaggering around the place, all teeth on display as he grinned his pride at all the decorations adorning the palace. It was the festival of Ostara or Easter as Kari knew it and everyone was acting like it was a massive deal in asgard. The fact Loki was so chipper actually worried her though; what did the god of mischief have to do with a holiday about fertility and renewal? He didn't seem the type into bunnies and painting eggs to give to love ones. At least with all that posturing he made a highly visible target for her to hide from whenever he approached.

It almost seemed as if, the happier Loki was the more miserable she was as if they were a set of weighing scales. Kari had spent most of the day with the other servers balancing precariously on ladders to get all the gaudy decorations up and having a really good whine with Prue about wanting a real chocolate egg for easter – or just anything chocolate. The whining had been pretty one sided however, Kari wasn't even sure the other woman was listening but the venting was helpful at least.

When evening finally approached, the dining hall was the loudest and brightest she'd ever seen it. The singing and ballads didn't quit for a moment; even everyone's laughter was several decibels above the norm. Her ears were ringing every time she exited the room to fetch something else from the kitchens and at one point she even believed she had succumbed to deafness. That's why it was a huge surprise when everyone in the dining hall somehow heard the screaming from the corridor.

The whole room had gone dead silent when the first voice, a woman by the pitch, shrieked. Gazes turned sharply to follow the sound until a man's voice yelled out in pain and all present began to mutter and head towards the sound in unison. Thor had taken lead of the charge, followed by Odin and Loki hanging back just enough to be out of the way but still get a good look of what they'd find.

"What is this?" Thor growled out as he came upon a set of bodies, two guards crippled on the floor as they shook from a burning pain.

"Be watchful, my son." Odin pulled him back from touching the men. "This is a potent poison."

There was a set of screams now, several women's voices calling out as one giving the group another direction to follow. Thor was at the front again, his strides taking him several paces in front of the others as he readied his hammer for battle. A serving girl almost collided with him as she stumbled round the corner at a run, breathless and panic stricken but still able to tell him to hurry.

At the far end of the corridor was a spider, a huge fifteen foot spider in all its hissing furious glory and its current mission involved chasing down a couple of maidens running for their lives. One of the women, a redhead, slipped on her skirt as she tried to get away. He would have thrown his hammer at that point but instead the second woman had gotten in his way before he could get a good aim without hitting the civilians.

Kari hadn't thought about it, just reacted; Prue was down and caught up in her flowing skirts. All that hide and seek training with Egill had come in handy as she rolled to the side, effectively shielding Prue with her body as the spider began spitting its poison again. There was a tray still in her hand, one she had been taking back to the kitchens when the spider had set upon them and boy did it come useful as a shield.

"Fandralkin!"

She could hear Thor's voice but he was too far away, he wouldn't make it in time to stop the looming, pincer mouth filled monster about to stomp and crunch out their too short lives – well at least her too short life, Prue was probably a million years old. The stupid tray wasn't going to hold that goliath back now was it? Or could it? There was no harm in trying; she was going to die anyway.

Kari stood to her full height, lifting the tray over her head as the spider lunged into to take a bite out of her. She smacked it in the side of its face with a loud 'clang'; the spider tittered a step across with the blows force and seemed confused for a fraction of a second before trying again. 'Clang', she struck it again, this time over the top of its ugly head causing the creature to hiss in annoyance before receiving its third smack.

"Bad spider!" She was shouting at it now, the monster taking a step back every time she hit it. "That's it, you get back there!" Oh was she annoyed with this thing and boy did it know. "Go on!" She backed it up against the wall until it had nowhere else to move and simply started cowering every time she raised the tray. "Sit!" 'Clang' "Sit!" 'Clang' "I said, sit!" It finally sat, or at least did the spider equivalent of sitting. "Good spider." She grinned; that had been a lot easier than training Griffin when she first got him.

"Er, Fandralkin?"

She turned, hearing her sort of name for the second time, to see Thor with a look of intimidated amusement staring at her as he helped Prue to her feet. She soon flushed a crimson colour when she realized what appeared to be most of asgard right behind him shoving for room to see in the corridor. Had they really been watching the whole time and not bothered to come rescue them? And she had been under the impression they were the heroic type too.

"That was…" The god of thunder was lost for words, a hand rubbing the back of his neck as he looked to the others around him to fill in the blanks.

"Do you think you could get it to follow you outside?" Odin, having had enough of a ponder, came fearlessly toward the midgardian and her new pet spider.

"I dunno." She shrugged. "Could try. Aren't you going to kill it?"

"I am more interested in the how as to it got here." He indicated for her to try to lead the frightened goliath out of his palace. "To the yard if you would."

Kari let out a great sigh, and then turned back to the spider, lifting the tray and fanning it in the direction she wanted the creature to head in. It only coward into a tighter ball, legs curled inwards as if it were trying to will itself into death rather than get hit again.

"Shhh, it's ok." She tried the soft approach, her free hand stroking a hairy leg to soothe it until it responded. "That's it, come on."

It wasn't such a hard thing to coax it along, once she finally got it out of the ball and started down the adjoining corridor. The moment he was sure she, apparently, had everything under control Odin had started bellowing loudly for Heimdall and ordering people around to clean up the mess.

The celebration had been ruined and something - a sensation of being watched - kept poking its accusing fingers in the direction of mister mischief himself. Could this have been what he was planning? Somehow coax a giant poisonous spider into the palace to cause havoc and disrupt the festival? No wonder he had been in such a good mood.


	17. Chapter 17: The art of persuation

She was sitting outside, next to the stables, with a chittering spider doing something web related behind her. Was she supposed to just wait here with it? Odin had not ordered her to return after taking it outside and even if she had wanted to leave it kept shadowing her now as if a duckling following its mother. It was certainly a good thing she wasn't frightened of spiders – many weird and wonderful specimens having lived with her back home on earth for years, taking care of the flies, that hung out around all the mess in her house. Horses on the other hand.

Kari cringed as she heard another neighing sound coming from the stables – horrible biting beasts that loved nothing better than to throw people off their backs and kick threatening to stomp. It was a teenage trauma; a high school trip to the country where they had camped in a field, sailed small pico boats and lastly went horse back riding across several fields. She had been being mouthy and back talking the teacher for the last few days so he'd decided to punish her by talking the stable owners into giving her their biggest horse. He was called Billy and seemed like a gentle beast at first; she too cocky hadn't thought twice about mounting the docile creature. Then everything had changed. Something had spooked him whilst they were walking painfully slowly in a single line down the side of a hill. He'd whinnied loudly, thrown his head back and reared to her horror. What was she supposed to do but hang on? Hang on whilst the horse flew out of her control, bucking and rolling onto the ground until she'd fallen off and screamed at the weight of his body on her leg. It hadn't even ended there, he'd come back for seconds the moment he was back on his feet, hooves stomping around her crippling her into a silent fear until an instructor had managed to calm him.

Her leg had been broken in two places, a helicopter had even had to come and get her from the field because they were in such a remote area. That had been fun at least, though she was pretty high on pain meds when they were actually flying. A couple of months off school hadn't been as good as she first thought it would be. Her current foster mother had been furious, having to take long breaks at work during the day to come check on her at home. Soon as she'd recovered she was sent packing to a new foster home, a new school and just after she'd gotten used to the old set too. All because of a stupid horse called Billy.

"What are you doing here?"

Kari looked up at the voice, it was a woman she vaguely recognized by her light brown hair and bemused frown. This was the woman from months ago, the one that had been grooming that eight-legged horse when Kari had been waiting on Thor.

"Watching a spider?" Kari shrugged.

"I have eyes to see that." The other woman responded dryly, arms folding as she scrutinized the newest eight-legged creature to the area with her gaze.

"Odin said to bring it here."

"Very well." She nodded, still eyeing up the spider even as she was turning to leave.

"Hey, what's with that deformed horse I saw you with before?"

"Defor- Do you imply Sleipnir?" Apparently this woman was pretty hot-tempered. "Son of Loki and Odin's most noble steed?"

"Wait what?" Kari had to back it up a moment there and was thankfully already sitting otherwise she probably would have tripped at the stable hands words. "Loki fucked a horse? And it had a baby?" Oh this was seriously sick, even for Loki. "Dude…" she had to take a moment, least she vomited in front of yet another person at the mental image of Loki raping a mare. "How is that even possible?"

"Loki is his mother."

"No… No?... No way!" Oh this was too sickeningly hilarious. "See, now I know you're messing with my head, whoever you are."

"Ryder."

"Uh-huh." Kari was awkwardly chuckling, a disbelieving tone fluctuating through her voice even as the woman clarified her name. If she began with such intense lies and stories then who knew where the truth began. "It's not possible for a man to have a baby. Let alone with a horse. There's DNA no meshingness and stuff."

"You must be that midgardian mortal I heard had come to our realm." Ryder, arms so tightly folded against her chest she almost appeared to be hugging herself, was now eyeing her with more scrutiny than she'd reserved for the spider. "You have a great deal to learn about the differences between gods and humans."

"Whatever darling."

"I am not your darling." Ryder flashed her a dangerous look that emitted the words 'go to hell' without them ever needing saying before she turned sharply and stomped back into the stables.

"Fuck you too." Kari muttered under her breath and couldn't help but laugh at the story she'd been told.

Settling into her second hour of waiting outside in the chilly evening air, Kari had finished teaching the spider a third trick – to shake hands – when Odin had finally graced them both with his presence. He was alone, tired but determined faced as he approached the unlikely pair shaking hand to hairy leg. He'd stopped to admire the display with a quiver of a smile before thudding his spear on the ground for undivided attention.

"You cannot keep this creature, Fandralkin. Do not break its will any further than you already have." He raised a hand to hush her before her open mouth could emit sounds of a denying manner. "It is understood the nature of your power to be unrecognized, tamer of man and beast both. I had not thought to witness such from you so openly before."

"I don-" He hushed her again with another gesture of his palm.

"I had thought it better you not know, that we may keep a watchful eye within reaching distance but you have grown if only from necessity and fear. Your persuasion is a primal magic, difficult to control and best not developed." He paused, letting his words sinking in as she stared at him confused by the second fantasy story of the night. "You still do not understand." He was disappointed, relieved and worried at once. "When you triggered the portal from midgard to this realm, what were you thinking at the time?"

"I don't know. Get me away from this horrible museum?" She shrugged.

"You persuaded the will of dark magic to aid you in escape."

"No I-" She was laughing but halted once again by another hand signal.

"In my throne room, when you came to make the request of me to allow your passage to midgard, I refused you twice before you became angered and persuaded me. I thought myself immune to such things but not as strongly as I believed, an error on my part to let my guard down for that moment." There was a flash of anger, blame for them both equally shared in the glint of his one good eye for the barest of moments. "This creature, in your desperation, you broke its conviction and though it can not understand your words it understands well your persuasion to perform tricks."

"You're really freaking me out now."

"Good." Odin came closer, lifting her chin till their eyes were leveled and her full attention was set on remembering his next words. "You will learn to control this, Fandralkin, and you will not use it for frivolous gain any longer. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes." She breathed, shocked at what she had heard, and she was hearing but well aware of the look of danger in his eye.

"This creature belongs to Niflheim." Odin had brushed past her, as if the previous conversation were no more than a bad dream, and began an inspection of the chittering spider. "You will take it to the bifrost bridge where Heimdall will return it."

"Yes." She swallowed, shaking, dazed and desperate to cling to something. "How… how did it get here?"

"A small dimensional breach, most likely an accidental occurrence but sealed now."

She suddenly blanched at his words, the memory of Loki in the library springing to mind 'It will look accidental I assure you'. Should she say something? Tell Odin about her eavesdropping on his son in a place she shouldn't have been just after he'd given her such a terrifying lecture?

"Do not worry yourself on this, Fandralkin." He rested his arm on her shoulder, sensing her unease and assuming it to be of a slightly different nature than it truly was. "Do your duty and return swiftly for rest." He walked back inside the palace, not giving her a second glance.


	18. Chapter 18: Man-cat

When she finally got back to her room, Kari lay in the dark thinking about her life through a lens. Odin had accused of using a primal magic to 'persuade' those around her and the thought alone made her feel sick to her stomach. Whenever she'd gone out looking to pull a guy, she'd never come home alone that was for sure but was that really tricking them? Had she somehow forced men into her bed? What about boyfriends? All the relationships she had pursued had ended when she dumped them, never the other way around. Was that it again? What about Griffin?

"Do you stay because you want to, Griffin?" She rolled onto her side, tabby-cat purring on the pillow beside her head as she lingered inches from touching him – to afraid to follow through incase it were true.

What about Egill? Had that entire mess been her fault? Did she somehow make him believe she was interested with voodoo? She suddenly remembered Prue, the heroine that came to save her and the realization of having strongly wished to be rescued at that time directed at the woman. Oh god, what was real?

She hardly slept that night, stuck on loop crying and thinking until exhaustion had claimed her unwillingly. Morning had come much to quickly, her alarm going off to wake her for work but her mind still moping and tired from only a couple of hours sleep filled with terrifying nightmares. She lay there, staring up at the ceiling and ignoring the buzz of her phone even as it stopped and began its chimes every five minutes on the automatic snooze function. She didn't want to get up, fearful, tired and horribly aware of being an unknowingly horrible person.

It wasn't until the warmth behind her grunted and rolled onto her that she'd even come to notice something was very wrong indeed. Her eyes went wide, alarm ringing for the eighth time and a man's arm draped across her breasts. She followed the patches of hair on his arm along, slowly, until a mess of dirty blond hair was visibly snoring against the mattress. Oh and he was naked.

She screamed, he woke with a start, she rolled out from under him and threw herself at the wall covered in Heimdall as the man leapt into the opposite corner. She was staring at him, she couldn't stop staring at him, wide mouthed, slack jawed, disbelieving. Oh my, did he have nice abs – no, she couldn't think about that now. He in turn was looking around the room wildly, as if only seeing it for the first time and attempting to taste the air with his tongue. What was he doing? Why was he in her bed? Who was he?

As his gaze finally made its way to her, her breathing hitched, unable to continue its usual journey in and out of her eager lungs. His eyes, she knew those eyes, as human as they looked now the tawny feline nature of those eyes were still unmistakable.

"G-Griffin?" She blurted out.

"Meow?" He said, the question mark obvious in the tone of his voice.

"Oh god, I've not done this to you have I?" She was shocked, unable to think clearly as she scrambled forward to meet the cat-man in the centre of the room as he approached making a choking sound as if trying to purr. "I am so sorry. I… I don't know how I… I'm so sorry!" She held him, he in turn trying to climb onto her lap but far too big.

There was a knock at the door, startling Kari into a surprised yelp. She began looking around the small room for something to help her. A hiding spot! She needed to hide him, who knew what Odin would do to them both if he found out.

"Come on Griffin." She began making kissy noises and coaxing him onto the bed. "That's it, you stay there ok."

"Meow." He continued trying to purr as she covered him with a bed sheet with the hopes of pretending he was just a normal guy in her bed – people could think she was a whore all they wanted.

Holding her hand up to get him to stay she slowly made her way to the door, golden eyes training her every movement. As the third knock resounding against the door she finally opened it a fraction and peered around at the unwanted visitor. It was Prue, concerned and suspicious at her behaviour.

"We heard screaming from the kitchens." The redhead frowned, having been worried but now just annoyed she had come all the way down the corridor to check.

"Sorry, yeah I uh… fell out of bed. Weird dream." Kari laughed unconvincingly.

"Is that so." Prue rolled her eyes. "Well hurry up and get dressed, morning meal is starting."

"Oh uh… yeah could you cover for me? For just a bit? I kind of need to… do something important."

"Can it wait till after?"

"No. Not… really. I have to deal with this now." Her face was pleading, Prue attempting to read more into her expression before suddenly coming to an opinion.

"I understand. The spider terrified us all and you forced to be with it for so long on your own." Her tone was sincere in its sympathy. "Just change your sheets, go take a bath and forget about it. Could happen to anyone."

"What? I… uh… yeah. Thanks, Prue." Kari nodded a confused gratitude as the redhead gave her a quick smile and finally left.

As she closed the door, still thinking on what had just been said, Kari suddenly grasped the other woman's words with a face palming action. She thought she wet the bed. She actually thought a grown woman had wet the bed because of a fifteen-foot spider that spat poison. Ok, that didn't sound quite as implausible now she put it in that context but still. She was never going to be able to look Prue in the eyes again after this. First things first, she needed to deal with Griffin but how?

Maybe someone would help her? Her grandfather? No, she had the perfect idea. Loki – he understood magic, he probably knew of a way to reverse this and she had perfect blackmail to hold over him via the spider that disrupted easter. How was she going to do this though? She couldn't just leave Griffin in a man's body alone in her room whilst she went to get Loki - most likely in his library. Maybe she could take Griffin with her? Drape him in a sheet, take him down to the library with her – it was still early so most would be waking up, in the dining hall or still asleep. The servers would start taking the platters in soon as well; they had to go now.

"Griffin? Hello my big soppy tomcat." She cooed to the flirtatious man currently stretching himself in odd contortions all over her bed and flashing her everything he had to display.

Getting a man-cat down three corridors, unseen and keeping his sheet on was possibly worse than getting him into a pet carrier. He had been acting as if he were going to the vets the entire way; she'd even attempted to 'persuade' him a few times but had no idea how that really worked. In the end she had, had to somehow get the sheet over his head so he was blind and confused and push him the entire way as he made hissing noises.

Getting into the library was a relief, a ridiculously weight lifting release of purest pleasure. Loki was not there however, the best explanation for that being he was probably at breakfast where her growling stomach wished she could go to as well. She let Griffin out of his bed sheet trap, the naked man-cat instantly running off down a row of book shelves and disappearing into what seemed to be a section on cookery. Nobody came here accept Loki that she had ever noticed; so letting him loose didn't seem too big a deal – until he pee'd on something. Nothing she could do about it now, the book of dumplings would just have to dry out and never be spoken of again.

Kari moved to the centre of the library, taking a seat behind Loki's desk and began the arduous task of waiting to blackmail a god of mischief into aiding her cat-issues. It wasn't until she began plucking idly at bits of loose thread on her clothing that she even noticed what she had hastily thrown on – inside out grey leggings, flip-flops with socks and that purple eighties big shirt thing without a bra. She had to laugh; she looked ridiculous but quickly tried to amend the issue by putting the leggings on the right way and removing the socks. As she was trying to figure out what to do with the worrying amount of boob on display from higher angles there was an aggravated clearing of someone's throat somewhere behind her.

It was Loki, staring at her with a blank expression only a few feet away. When had he got here? She hadn't heard his footsteps, the loud 'tap, tap, tap' ones he usually strolled around the library with. She jumped up out of his seat, the bouncing motion of which he did not visually miss though at least when he continued to look down at her from his higher vantage he at least had the courtesy to only look her in the eyes.

"My, my are you a glutton for punishment." He began, his tone amused, icy and sickened. "Perhaps it is time to put a lock on the door, or maybe a curse of some kind to keep unwanted vermin in their place."

"Bitch, bitch, bitch." She rolled her eyes at him, she didn't have time to listen to his insults and cower in fear this morning. "Look, yes, I know, we both know, library for me is bad. I'm a bad girl. But whatever, I need something from you."

"Another slap?" He looked eager to supply that demand.

"No." She inhaled heavily through her nostrils attempting to steady her patience. "I think I accidentally turned my cat into a man last night."

He was silent; stone faced the moment her words reached his ears. It was like a transformation was taking place right in front of her, starting from his eyes and working its way down into his body like a flowing wave of mirth. He was laughing; more importantly he was laughing at her.

"You really believe yourself capable of such magic?" His toothy grin was horrendously big, like a hungry wolf ready to eat her alive.

"Whatever! Just help me turn him back."

"What reasons have I to help a trespassing, spying, offensive mortal such as yourself?"

"Because I'll tell your dad the spider was your fault." She was feeling pretty damn smug at that point, but the feeling was short lived.

"And you believe the king of Asgard, my father, will trust the word of some less than half-breed, common serving wench, over his own son?" He was laughing again, coming closer to her position until she could feel the edge of his breath hitting her temple. "Your feeble minded delusions are of no importance to anyone in this realm, Karian Motter."

"You have a pretty bad reputation you know."

"Oh I know. I've spent a life time crafting that reputation." He said as if dealing with a small child that didn't know any better. "Do you have proof to substantiate your would be claims to my father?"

"I heard you talking about it." She steadied herself, willing more conviction than she truly felt into her posture and tone.

"So you will admit, to your king, that first you trespassed into a forbidden area and then you began to eavesdrop and spy, like a roach in the wall, on his son just so happening to over hear a private conversation, between myself and my daughter, about sneaking a highly venomous arachnid into the palace." His eyebrows were raised, wolfish grin returned to its place of pride across the horizon of his face. "Do you not see how absurd your accusations truly are? What would be your plan after attempting to blackmail the son of Odin? Seduce me? Dress in this revealing manner and hope I might take pity enough to repay a favor for a favor?"

Her hand shot up at his suggestion, swiping in an arc to slap him as hard as she could but he was a lot speedier than she would have expected. Her wrist was restrained in his iron tight grip, squeezing on her hard enough to let her know just how powerless she was – he could do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, if he so wanted. She wanted to scream, she should have been screaming but she was terrified into a stunned silence even as he pinned her against the desk.

"Harlot. Moving your affections from man to man, desperate to be loved just like your grandfather. But unlike Fandral, it is the only skill you truly possess and from what I hear you are not even that good at it."

"Get off of me." She was staring him right in the eyes, if she really could persuade, damn did she need to trick him off her. "Please."

Loki blinked, suddenly looking bored of this game and released her from under him. Kari shakily righted herself, readjusting her attire as he stood with his back to her apparently thinking about something. Her wrist hurt, another hand shaped bruise reddening into life – gifts from Loki were never pleasant.

"I will help you." He finally spoke again, turning on his heel just in time to witness her hiding tears. "No need to weep with joy, my reputation as a giving god is legendary."

"Liar." She spat back at him only making him chuckle.

"Or perhaps that is the virtue I am best known for." He shrugged as if genuinely not sure. "Your animal," he started doing some sort of motion with his hands towards the far side of the library, "is as he once was."

"And that's it?" She was trying to be angry but the cold sensation of fear still had its grips on her spine making her just sound chilled to the bone.

"Not quite." She didn't like the sounds of that. "I may require something of you in the future." He quickly noted the look of horror on her face as she tried to cover herself up some more. "Not that." He rolled his eyes, a sigh leaving his lips at the absurdity of her assumption.

"While we're on the subject of 'that'," she was still holding herself covered, a liars lies were often believable, "who has been talking about me behind my back saying I'm a 'harlot'?"

"That would be me." Loki laughed, thoroughly enjoying her appalled expression.


	19. Chapter 19: Getting down with bubbles

With Griffin back and the heavy weight of an impending favor looming above her head, Kari was finding it difficult to concentrate at work for the rest of the day. In the end Prue had stopped her, too distracted to notice she was pouring ale into a warriors helmet and not his mug, and felt her forehead several times for signs of illness. She was quite well however, but that did not stop her from being sent to her room to rest like a small child. Really she should have been grateful for the time off but it only allowed room for more thinking.

That morning in the library was like a horrifying blur. Streams of words, insults and physicality that she was slowly coming to grips with being Loki's personality. He was the god of mischief, sure, but why did that mischief move so swiftly from playful to evil like a revolving door? Was he bad? Would Odin allow his son to be bad?

She was sitting on the floor in the centre of her room by now, sketching a picture of Heimdall to try and steady her thoughts. A nowhere crush as the guardian was, there was something comforting in that knowledge especially when tied with this 'persuasion' thing. She hadn't managed to accidentally 'persuade' Heimdall into anything over the past few months; not even talking more than a handful of syllables when she visited and boy did she want him to pay her attention.

Maybe it didn't work the way she thought it did? People had been using persuasion to accomplish all sorts of things for millennia in various manners - dressing sexy, presenting facts and bribery to name a few. Odin certainly did not seem any different from the time she first met him to post-persuasion or Prue. If she had managed to use it on Loki that morning then wouldn't he have been different after he got off her? He was definitely still a dick and all three seemed to have thought it was there idea with reasonably thought out plans during and after; whether they were good for her or not.

No, the more she thought about it, the less likely it seemed she was actually changing these people. It was more like she had focused their attention on a single path already within their mind and they had then found how best to follow it. When she had attempted to do the same to Griffin, getting him through the corridors, he knew not where he was going and so there was no path for her to persuade him to take. Like a sultry vixen strolling up to a man at the bar, on some level he has to want it for the persuasion to work. Still, it was cruel to coax out of someone what he or she may not truly desire; Odin was right on the account it was a power that should never be cultivated.

That aside, how had she managed to alter her cat into a man? Even Loki had been surprised when she made the claim; she was incapable in his opinion and also her own. On the flipside of the same coin, how had he known so quickly what the counter would be without ever having looked at the original magic? He was always studying those damn books before he did flashy things. Had he had something to do with it? The possibility was certainly available what with her having eaves dropped on him and disrupted his spider fun prematurely. He had plenty of reason to prank her but again he had also helped her turn the man back to a cat as a favor with a price. What was real in this whole mess?

"Urgh." She groaned, pushing her latest Heimdall drawing away from her.

Over the next few weeks, Loki had begun ordering her around like his personal slave. He would stop her in the corridors and make her carry items, even small ones like a button he'd remove from his own clothing, to wherever he was heading – taking the longest route. She brought him lunch every afternoon to the library, though he never so much as looked at her let alone thanked her for the service. It was as if he was letting her know how much he already owned her and just how more degrading the favor would be. Whatever, she was making sure to lick something random on his plate before it ever reached him as a silent protest.

When what she knew as June finally reared its head around Kari was at least starting to get used to the oddities her life was surrounded by. Then again her good mood could also be justified by the fact she had a day off. Oh and it was her birthday.

She was up early today, despite not needing to be awake for anything important, but Fandral had been filling her head for the last couple of days with grand plans. She was excited, she couldn't help it; a real birthday with real family and she was going to get to eat in the dining hall tonight instead of serving. Finally a chance to openly eat that premium cuisine instead of sneaking the odd bit now and then.

When someone started knocking on her door, she did not think twice about opening it – it was probably her grandfather or Prue after all. Oh how she wished she had pretended not to be in. It was a steward; more importantly it was Loki's steward, mostly in charge of keeping his rooms in order as she had come to understand. The man was mostly deaf and often wore the expression of someone long since seen reality – either why Loki trusted him touching his things or the reason for his ailments. What did the god of mischief want so early and when she wasn't even working?

She kind of had to go, just in case but more importantly because the steward was blanking her over pronunciation of 'no'. A sense of guilt lead her in step behind the servant, he would probably get in trouble if she did not come with him – also, getting the chance to tell Loki to politely go fuck himself was not worth missing. Still, it was strange when they passed the library and kept going all the way to the prince's rooms. Hopefully he wasn't going to ask her to dress him or worse.

They entered the too big main room; exactly the same as she had last seen it when previously sneaking in to prank the mischief-maker and went passed the bedroom towards the bathroom. Why were they heading there? Oh god, he didn't want to make her wash him did he? She was grimacing when the steward paused, indicating she enter before he turned tail and left on other business. Should she? Perhaps, she surmised, he was plotting a prank in there.

Taking a deep breath to steady her nerves, Kari knocked on the door and waited for a response to enter. Steam billowed out at her the instant she opened the door, momentarily blinding her from what lay within. She entered, closed the door behind her and began wafting the stench of whatever he was bathing in away from her nose. Oh yes, he was bathing but at least he had the courtesy to be lying up to his chin in a misty grey colored water.

He paid her no mind at first, lying there in a pool big enough to take on two or three more people at once – lucky bastard. It almost appeared he had dosed off, eyes shut and features perfectly relaxed but it was not the case.

"I am not having a bath with you if that's what this is." Kari broke the silence.

Loki cracked open an eye, giving her an un-amused glance before suddenly moving. At first she was sure he was getting out, her gaze flickering in a swinging motion around the room and back to him again not knowing whether to avert her gaze. As the water around him subsided he was now sitting, torso on display but nothing more as he ran his hands through his hair several times to keep it from his eyes. She was allowed to look at this right? Not as good as shirtless Thor but wet Loki was nothing to scoff at either.

"I have a task for you." He indicated for her to pass him something, on the counter besides her, she obliging by tossing him a cloth and soap.

"Was that it?" This really was one of his wind-ups.

"No." Cloth foamed he had started rubbing himself down with it causing her to believe for a strange moment that this was possibly some sort of bizarre Loki-peep-show birthday present.

"Ok… what are you doing?"

"You are aware of what bathing is?"

"Yes, but why am I here whilst you're getting down with the bubbles?"

"Must I really repeat myself?" He shook his head, disbelieving before smirking – possibly noting the way she was now an interesting shade of pink. "I have a task for you. You owe me after all and I always collect on what is owed me."

He was done with his sudding and now pointing at a large jug just behind him. She obliged him again; muttering to herself as she walked across the room to retrieve the item then tittered closer to the bath to hold the jug out to him. He ignored it, eyebrows raised as if the suggestion he rinse himself were preposterous. Whatever, all she had to do was throw some water over him a few times and that would be the end of it – no more looming favor. She got in closer, crouching slightly as she dipped the jug at the far end of the bath then lifted it out of the water and poured it over him not managing to look him in the eyes. This was so degrading, even for Loki, but at least he was enjoying it – his expression was one of amusement.

"Alright fine, we're done no more favor ok." She shuddered slightly as she finally got to put the jug back in its spot.

"That was not my task." He was laughing, at her, as usual.

"I really hope you-" She caught herself before adding the drowning part to that sentence. "-get to the point soon, it's my day off."

"I am informed you are dining with us tonight." He stood, climbing out of the bath to grab a towel as she squeaked and threw herself to face the wall so as not to see anything more than the flash of butt just glimpsed. "I want you to get close to my brother during the evening, sit with him if you can and then you will slip this," he was next to her now, wrapped in a towel and pushing a vial into her hand, "into his drink. If you can convince him to drink it in one go that would be best. Thor will gladly accept any challenge if presented with the opportunity."

"Are you…" She couldn't stop staring at the tiny vial in her hand, so small, so dangerous looking. "Are you asking me to poison your own brother?"

"A sleeping remedy, I assure you."

"Uh-huh." She followed him out of the bathroom, heading towards his bedroom now. "Why do I find that so hard to believe, liar? Why would you even want to drug your own brother anyway?"

"It will be fun." He shrugged – as in shrugged off his towel.

"Oh god…" Kari turned suddenly more embarrassed than she had been in a very long time indeed. "Stop doing that, you're going to give me a heart attack."


	20. Chapter 20: I'll cry if I want to

At least the rest of her birthday was going pretty well. Kari was currently riding on Fandral's back as the warriors three were guiding her around the city; her feet having grown tired from a mixture of walking and drinking. The excitable men, and Hogun, had shown her around just about every tavern and place of fun filled interest they could find; including several they had not yet discovered. It was almost like being back on earth again, going on a mega bar crawl, except this one was during the afternoon and filled with bizarre medieval looking games. Whatever, she was having fun and had even taught the group a song – abba: take a chance on me – which they were currently performing a very interesting version of on there way back to the palace.

With dinner rapidly approaching, Kari had decided to have a power nap back in her room to try and sober up a little before more drinking later. The rest had been somewhat disturbed, not only by her snoring which kept shocking her awake at its loudest points but also the sickening sensation settling in her stomach as Loki's request moved back into the forefront of her mind. What was she going to do? What would Loki do if she did not do it? Why did he want to sedate his brother anyway? Fun? Really? What fun was there in drugging Thor? There had to be more to this than meets the eye or why else would the god of mischief be poking his nose into so pitiful a prank. She needed a bath and change of clothes to get the stench of sweaty men and sin off her.

When Fandral finally came to collect her he was obviously greatly distressed by her appearance. She was wearing one of the two party outfits she'd been able to pack before leaving earth for the last time and it was very short skirted and lacking in the back. She couldn't believe the words she was hearing from him, the kind an overprotective father might say to a fourteen-year-old girl on her way to school dressed like a hooker.

"You are not wearing that." His hands were on his hips, mouth a hard line, as he stared her down meaning business.

"Don't be such an old man." She rolled her eyes at him. "I haven't been able to wear something nice in months."

"Try wearing something nice that leaves room for the imagination." He closed her door as he went to wait outside.

Was he serious? The playboy of asgard wanted her to dress more conservatively? The situation just screamed of hypocritical thinking but what was she to do. Muttering and sighing back over to her wardrobe she started pulling out other items trying to find an ensemble that would meet both their high expectations finally deciding on a pairing between high waist denim shorts and her white blouse with blue flowery pattern coupled with her push-up bra to accentuate the cleavage on display. She had just shaved her legs so there was no way in hell he was going to make her cover those up but at least she was a lot more covered than she had been previously.

She exited her room pulling on a pair of red flats, vial stashed in a convenient lipstick pocket on her shorts, and gave her grandfather a determined look that simply stated this was the best he was getting. He was frowning considerably as he gave her a once over, obviously displeased about the amount of thigh on display but soon shrugged it off with a smile as he offered her his arm.

"If you are set upon by hordes of men I will simply say I told you so." He commented, a smug expression uplifting his moustache as if on some level proud his genetics had miraculously created a nice pair of legs.

"Not as if we're going to be sitting with anyone that isn't your friend, granddad." She chuckled. "Besides, haven't you all been to midgard heaps? Girls wear a lot less than this there."

"This is not midgard." Fandral pointed towards a gaggle of women as they passed, all of which were so heavily dressed all you could do was imagine.

Still, she was far too excited to have debbie-downer Fandral ruin the evening for her with his over exaggerated opinions on her attire. Grandfathers were supposed to say such crazy 'in my day' dribble about 'young people today' not understanding how to do anything as good as back then. As they entered the hall, however, the volume did lower ever so noticeably as eyes focused in on the pair walking towards the head of the table. Was it because of what she was wearing or because a midgardian server was about to eat at a table reserved for the most distinguished guests of the king?

"Fandralkin!" Thor had exclaimed the moment he noticed her looking nervous on her grandfather's arm. "Come, sit! The god of thunder welcomes you to our feast!"

He was certainly jovial, pushing the person next to him down the bench to make room for her and Fandral. As she sat, awkwardly having to pivot over the bench because of it's height that left her feet just barely touching the ground, she noticed for a moment Odin giving her a peculiar look further down the table before turning back to a man who was more a mess of hair than flesh and bone. Perhaps he hadn't been told she was dining with them? Or thought she had persuaded someone into inviting her.

"Seeing as it's my birthday, Thor, could you please stop calling me Fandralkin?" She gave the bimbo a slight smile; not missing the way Loki was pretending not to notice her existence opposite him in her peripheral.

"But Fandralkin is such nobler a name than, 'Kari'." His tone was of one that did not like the feel of her name on his tongue. "It is as if I am asking you too 'carry' some mundane item." He was perplexed; a sudden memory flashing in her head of the way Loki would simply say, "carry" before handing her something in the corridors.

"Fine, then Karian?" She tried for a compromise.

"If it is all the same to you, friend, I would prefer you remain as Fandralkin."

"Oh, you're all infuriating." Kari crossed her arms in a grump and turned to look at her grandfather besides her trying his best to hold back a laugh at her expense.

"Have a drink, my dear." Fandral signaled a server to come and fill their mugs. "Let Thor tease you not."

As the evening progressed the level of merriment too increased. Volstagg had humored her with an arm wrestle, which he had allowed her win at the last moment, much to everyone's entertainment and several embarrassing stories had surfaced about her grandfather and Thor chasing women in different realms. She was somewhat shocked to find out there were a lot more realms than she knew about, all with vast differences of environment and life forms. When dragons had been mentioned she was all over that like a bad rash.

"Real, honest, dragons?" Kari was wide-eyed and excited like a child at a toy store. "Are they like puff the magic dragon?"

"I am not aware of 'Puff the magic dragon'." Thor shrugged at the others who in turn looked confused. "Is this dragon a resident of midgard?"

"You seriously don't know who puff the magic dragon is?" She was stunned, shocked, her childhood had just been kicked in the nuts; she had to sing the song. "Puff the magic dragon lived by the sea and frolicked in the autumn mist in a land called Hona Lee. Little Jackie Paper, loved that rascal puff, and brought him strings and ceiling wax and other fancy stuff."

The others had broken into a chorus of laughter; obviously dragons the asgardians knew were not the kind to let small children ride on their backs. Once the table hammering assault on her childhood had finally started to die down, Kari feeling rather upset at a mixture of their teasing and dragons not being nice magical creatures as she believed, Thor had begun poking her for the rest of the lyrics. As horrible as having your dreams shattered on your birthday was, hearing a band of drunken asgardians singing 'Puff the magic dragon' from start to finish three times really made up for it. Even Loki had deemed it amusing enough to join in on the last round but that may have also been his attempt to seem among the crowd as he kept flashing her looks of impatience – he really wanted her to drop the vial in his brothers drink.

Kari swallowed, her hand brushing over the vial several times and her face growing grim. She looked up at Thor, his smiling stupid face only making her skin turn greyer at the overwhelming guilt blossoming into life like a tree in the pits of her bowels. The god of thunder suddenly looked at her, concerned by her expression as she hurriedly looked away.

"What ails you, friend?" He asked, his tone quiet so as not to be easily overheard.

"Nothing." She lied, a too obvious lie that kept his attention hooked on her until she felt the need to add more. "Really, nothing. I just started thinking about, uh, dragons and it uh, reminded me that I'm not a child anymore."

"You need not worry, Fandralkin, your prime is still upon you and your heart is still so young."

"Yeah right." She rolled her eyes. "I'm nearly thirty. I'm supposed to have my life together by now."

"I am much older than you and most say I am little more than a child."

"That's because you are." She chuckled, he in turn laughing it off and slapping her across the shoulder into a friendly embrace.

"I see you are against me too." He raised his mug, downing the contents before flinging it across the room. "Another!" He bellowed as a server came rushing over with a new beverage.

"Such a waste." Kari shook her head at him, his smile ridiculously cheeky as he chuckled into his new drink.

Really, how was she supposed to drug the giant oath? He was too silly, childish and sweet. It was like plotting tricks on a puppy knowing all too well the big sad eyes of betrayal that would await when he discovered her involvement; knowing herself so well, she was acutely aware of how the guilt would rise until swallowing her whole. She really was not a good accomplice for a mischief-maker.

Fiddling with the vial again, she decided upon her next move with a strong fore knowledge that the result would be unpleasant. She looked over at Loki, busying himself with listening to another guest and bit her lip as she leaned a little further under the table and kicked him. His attention was immediate, green orbs consuming her in their wild nature but his expression so casual and in opposition to the depths within him. Their eyes were locked, an unspoken conversation that indicated a no go for his plans by the shake of her head. His brow twitched, a disappointed annoyance etched into his forehead just visible enough for her to distinguish but give others the impression he were bored. Oh, there was payback written in his eyes tonight but would he really dare do anything at the dinner table?

She looked away, leaning her chin on Fandral's shoulder and receiving a pat on the head in turn. She was sleepy, merrily drunk and oh so sigh full. Closing her eyes for a moment, she yawned and slipped into a moment of restful peace as the overly rich and fatty food digested in her stomach. It really was very nice, almost as good as late night curry on the way home from an evening of clubbing.

Enraptured in the moment, she hardly noticed the woman shrieking across the hall but instead was alerted to the sense something was wrong via her grandfathers stiffening body. Opening her eyes she gasped as the problem came into focus and sat bolt up right at the bewildered mess of dirty blond hair streaking through the dining room as if not knowing where he was.

"Who is this fool?" Thor was standing, amused by the naked nature of their guest.

"Griffin!" Kari was on her feet circling the table to reach her man-cat.

"Your cat?" Exclaimed a mystified Fandral followed by loud muttering along the dining table.

"Loki! What the hell?" She was torn between the two men though the cat one was soon at her side rubbing his cheek against her arm.

"I know not what-" He began but was quickly silenced as a loud 'thwack' reverberated through the room – she shouldn't have hit him.

"THAT IS ENOUGH!" Odin was furious, his voice was so loud for a moment she thought she might wet her pants but being the stubborn type…

"Why are you always such a dick?" She was shouting at Loki as he looked around the room as if to suggest she were mad. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Fandralkin, remove your pet from the dinner hall." Odin was talking again but more than a little ignored by the midgardian.

"Just stop it already! You can't even be nice on my goddamn birthday!" Oh god she was crying, she couldn't help it, Loki was probably laughing his ass off on the inside – even if he did pretend to be so cool and calm sipping his wine. "Turn him back and stop it!"

"As your king I hereby order yo-"

"You are not my king!" She bellowed back at the allfather before fully knowing what she was saying.

The whole room suddenly went very quiet as if people were pretending not to exist in case caught up in the storm that was about to hit. Odin was staring at her, the colour in her cheeks visibly draining from the one-eyed look of silent fury building within him. His next words were so low, almost whispered but carried by the room's acoustics to her ears.

"Ungrateful child." She blanched at his statement suddenly wanting to run very far away. "Guards, escort the midgardian to her room and make sure she stays there until further notice."

Wait, was he grounding her? This had to be a sick joke, the entire day a horrible joke. Maybe this was Loki's plan of mischief all along. He knew she wouldn't go through with it, couldn't go through with it; why else would he give her such a guilt ridden task?


	21. Chapter 21: Kiss it better

Here she was, in her room, yet again crying herself to sleep like some washed up soap actress. The melodrama of it all was actually adding to her internal frustration and venting outward as yet more tears. Fandral had stopped by, moments after she was escorted into her room by several disinterested guards, with a handful of condolences and equal lashings of 'I told you so' in context of Loki. It was not as if she could keep away from the prince, she worked in the palace and even if she didn't he was still a prince of asgard and could bother her anywhere he so pleased. All right, maybe she spurred on his interest in teasing her via retaliation pranks and getting knowingly underfoot; but could she really help how her personality was?

Now she was locked in her room, like a small child that's just got caught with her fingers in the cookie jar and it wasn't even her fault – sort of, she did say something not so good to the king after all. Griffin wasn't even with her, who knew where they had taken the man-cat too. She was desperately worried for her feline's safety on top of everything.

Lying on her bed, above sheets and sniffling as another wave of tears had finally ceased for the time being, Kari stared up at the odd shapes the nighttime light cascaded across her ceiling. It was strangely soothing watching the swell, almost relaxing enough to finally push her towards sleep if it had not been for a second knock of the night on her door. Maybe it was Odin summoning her for execution? Or better, maybe he was going to send her back to earth.

She got up, clothes now wrinkled and blouse untucked, making her way over to the door. She had to blink several times, and then wipe the blurriness from her eyes before it truly registered what she was seeing.

"May I enter?" Loki asked as she held the door open wider before shutting it behind him.

There was an odd pause as Loki looked around the dark room, a purring coming from under one arm that turned out to be a tabby cat of the Griffin persuasion. Facing her once again he deposited the unharmed feline in her eager arms and smirked at the instantaneous cooing she began smothering her fluffy menace with. It was like watching a mother fussing over a newborn until the child in question had his fill and loped away over to the bed.

"The queen, my mother, has sent me with a flower of apology." He was holding out a flower she recognized as being a white tulip.

"An apology from your mother?" She ignored the stem between his fingers. "What has she got to apologise for? You're the one wh-" She bit her tongue, letting her mouth run got her grounded after all and he with the power to mutate her cat again. "The only one who should be apologizing is you, Loki."

"Then I am truly, deeply sorry for whatever offence I may have caused you." His tone, his face was sincere but his eyes were definitely not.

"Liar." She scowled at him, the accusation causing him to chuckle and stroll from left to right as he calmed again.

"You cannot expect me to ever be sincere or trustworthy, I am the god of mischief and lies after all." He sighed as if it were a noble burden he had to carry alone. "Is the return of your animal not satisfactory enough?"

"How could you possibly, come to the conclusion, in that warped and twisted mind of yours, that returning my cat would some how make up for everything? You'll probably just turn him into something else the next time you get a bit bored and want to tease me. It's never ending with you and don't think I don't know it was you the first time either!"

"The first time?" He looked genuinely shocked. "But I thought you had mistakenly transformed the animal-"

"Don't." She was in no mood for his games now. "Just don't."

"Very well." He shrugged, his expression bored and indifferent. "I did not come here to play with you further, though you make it so easy."

"Is that why you're so obsessed with humiliating me?"

"Humiliating you." He stated; his eyes locked on hers with a level of fierceness. "I recall my hair becoming as golden as a wheat field."

"Yes well… you deserved that."

"Did I now? Did I also deserve to be made look a fool in front of your would-be-lover in the library after I so gallantly helped to hide you from him?"

"Oh we both know you'd of probably killed me if I hadn't of done that."

"I am more subtle than murder." He sniffed as if it were a point of pride. "Your slights against my person run redder than what I have done to you."

"You slapped me."

"And you slapped me."

They both went silent, eyes locked – blue on green – as the moonlight painted patterns over each faces. He definitely had her on that last one at least, a battle in his favor perhaps but the war was still undecided.

"I…" She faltered, swallowing back pride for a moment as he continued to hold her gaze. "I'm sorry I hit you in front of uh… everyone."

"I thought it was I who owed the apology." He smirked, finding it irresistible a jab to make. "It is a shame you can not heal my infliction as I did yours."

"I don't see a mark." She frowned, knowing all too well he was teasing her again and she hadn't hit him that hard anyway.

"Oh, the pain." His tone was so seductively low it made her shiver a little inside before getting a grip on her body once more.

"If that's what you really want, we have a midgardian version of healing bumps and bruises." She came closer; his position unchanged as she leaned upwards and lightly kissed his cheek. "Feel better?"

"No." He shook his head, unaffected by the occurrence and held the flower in his hand out to her once more. "Take it, pretend it is an apology from whomever you like."

She snorted accepting the tulip this time and finally letting him leave - now having accomplished his task.


	22. Chapter 22: Honeyed words

One day, two days, three days, four days, five days. That was how long she had been locked in her room staring at the ceiling, tidying up any messes she could find – which there were always plenty of – and trying to draw pictures of various things. She was bored, oh so bored and nobody stopped by to visit except Prue who brought her something to eat occasionally. The redhead's visits, though brief, were longingly awaited as with them came news of the outside world.

Apparently, Fandral had coerced the rest of the warriors three, lady Sif and Thor into asking the allfather for leniency a few days back. Egill had even gone on his own little mission, which was a surprise to Kari as she had assumed the asgardian had completely forgotten about her by now – Prue's involvement seemed plausible in his decision making however. People really seemed to be worried about her; tear jerkingly sweet as it was though it also brought up the question of just how bad her offence had been. Would the king really execute her? She knew she had joked about the idea at her lowest points but was it a genuine possibility?

Day five, that's where she was at and having a jolly good sigh as she fussed on a purring fur ball. It was relaxing, stress relieving, she had heard rumor that owning cats extended the life expectancy of owners and by the stroke induced tranquility Griffin was causing she could see that theory very possibly being true. It was a good thing too, as her door burst open allowing the passage of guards to escort her, Kari desperately needed all the internal calm she could muster.

Straightening her clothing, feline friend dispersed in fright to the windowsill, she rose from the bed and followed the armed men out into the corridor. It was a long walk, though not by actual distance but more so the metaphoric. She caught Prue's eye, as the woman passed them on her way back from clearing the dining hall after lunch, the two women exchanging a reassuring smile each. This could not be an end to her journey; it hardly even felt started.

"Karian Motter of midgard." Odin left the latest version of her name hanging in the air as he stared down at her from his throne. "You have disgraced yourself, the good name of your grandfather, the warrior Fandral the dashing, and you have publicly denied and offended the king of Asgard at his own table." He paused again, either letting his accusations sink in or just to prolong the discomfort in her knees from having to kneel on the hard floor. "Despite your arrogance and pride, it seems you are still in the possession of allies, even among my own house. It is with their pleas that I have decided to fore go harsher punishment, their reminder that you are a child and as such should be judged."

Did everyone really think she was a little girl? That probably shouldn't have annoyed her as much as it did but she needed something to bury a chunk of her mind in, least she dampen the floor in a matching golden shower from the kings pure intimidation.

"It is with great deliberation I have decided upon your penance. An adequate reprimand for a child is no simple determination; it must be trying, demanding and fit the lesson that must be learned. As such, I, Odin, King of Asgard, have come to the decision that you, Karian Motter of midgard, will prove yourself a true citizen of this realm by the completion of three of its societies most fundamental studies; the development of a warriors skill, a demonstration of the knowledge of magic and finally the recounting of the tales of our people and king." Oh god, he was making her go to school – perhaps the harsh punishment would have been the better option. "In order to complete these tasks, you will have to call upon those around you, humble yourself to their goodwill and by this same day, one year from now, demonstrate what you have learned. If I am not satisfied, in any way by what I see, then I hereby decree the original punishment for your actions will be reinstated and you shall be sent forth to the farthest reaches of the realm to live alone and unaided until such time as I allow your return." OK, the harsh punishment really was worse than school – it was horrible outside the city from what stories the others had told her. "I have spoken my judgment." He made a booming noise with his spear as it walloped the floor shocking her into almost standing. "Go, return to your duties."

She was dissed and dismissed but at least he had not used his pimp hand on her – it would have no doubt really hurt though probably not as much as her knees right now. Kari carefully rose, her legs stiff as she tried to straighten them and bow before scuttling away like an albino hermit crab. A feeling of possibly going down with something was circulating its way through her system though it was probably just a mixture of shock, terror and overwhelming trepidation. She had a lot to do in a year and he even expected it to be perfect – from a girl that failed most of her classes at high school that was a pretty tall order.

Not even a foot out of the throne room, she was instantly set upon by an anxious set of hands turning her on the spot before dragging her into a forceful embrace. Fandral appeared somewhat distraught, his grip around her like knotted iron and refusing to let go until he was sure she were still real. She blinked in the moment then tentatively mirrored his action, letting her forehead rest on his shoulder with a deep exhale. This was nice, she could feel blood returning to her extremities again as he held her in his safety.

"Tell of everything." His voice was flat, the joviality knocked out and replaced with concern.

She was sitting in one of the observation rooms, a giant fire in the centre of the room keeping her toasty on the outside whilst whatever was in her cup kept her warm on the inside. Fandral was busy discussing with the others about her plight, she had not been listening but instead trying to get very drunk and forget the world for the time being. Could she do this? Could she learn things? Weren't you practically incapable of learning new skills after a certain age? She was sure she had heard that said before, most likely to her face when discussing with a colleague about maybe, possibly, going to college or university one day. She had always regretted missing the opportunity of higher education but with her lack of high school qualifications, barely scraping a pass in art and surprisingly wood work – the bird house she had made was wonky but the teacher said it had style – it had always been one of those fanciful dreams people got.

She groaned into her cup as she finished its contents then leaned towards the jug for another refill. The liquid tasted like some sort of fruity, honey infused mead unlike anything she had tried before – a shame she was drinking it with such abandon instead of savouring the flavour.

"What do you think, my dear?" Fandral was staring at her; she merely blinked back, her cheeks flushed from the alcohol.

"Huh?" She was finding it hard to focus on his face.

"Learn swordsmanship from myself to complete your warriors task. I am sure you carry within you an affinity for the weapon." He was not dismayed by her snort of 'oh really'.

"And we shall all recite tales of heroics until you know them by heart." Volstagg looked eager at the thought of boasting.

"And no one knows better than I the stories of the king, my father." Thor laughed, seeming to be happy the knowledge he'd been hammered over the head with was finally going to prove itself useful for something other than making him want to out do them.

"Though I think not tonight." Volstagg was staring right at her. "It appears our young student has been suckling on the mead too long."

"Huh?" She mumbled again, not entirely sure who was talking anymore but having the inkling it was about her.

"Her tolerance has become impressive." Thor was looming over her now, turning the once full jug upside down to show the others its emptiness. "Well done, friend!"

He slapped her on the back, not even particular hard this time, but as drunk as she was Kari soon found herself off balance, whilst sitting down, before greeting the floor much to everyone's amusement.


	23. Chapter 23: Don't lick

Next morning, Kari was rudely awoken by her phone ringing much too loudly, the resulting noise metaphorically puncturing her skull and splitting her brain in half. Never had she achieved a hangover quite as magnificently out of the nine realms as this one was. She was also unaware how she had gotten home but her last memories of being with her grandfather quelled further worry on the subject.

"Shhh already." She sobbed and groaned at her phone, desperately trying to take aim at the off button but foiled several times by the sheer brightness of the world.

It was quite a feat, managing to crawl her way into the communal bathroom and somehow not drown herself in a bath tub but she desperately needed the wash – not only to wake up but jointly wash the alcohol from her pores. Back to work today, plenty of time to feel sorry for herself after breakfast was over and boy did she feel sorry for herself. Her head hurt, her pride hurt, pretty much everything just kind of hurt all at once. Memories of the night before were coming back slowly as she hovered around the dining hall like a zombie haphazardly filling cups and tittering back and forth with platters that felt a lot heavier than usual. Nobody said anything to her, even Prue was just acting as if everything was normal but the sense that people had been gossiping certainly reddened her ears. She had caught wind of a few snippets here and there when entering the kitchens but nothing lengthy enough to fully gather what it was about.

When lunchtime finally arrived she assumed her role, from the last several weeks once more, and filled a tray for Odin's youngest son. He was indeed in the library when she got there, messing around with something on his desk until he noticed her approach and made it disappear. Oh good, he was up to more mischief. She ignored the action and his staring, placing the tray down next to him as he gave the contents a bewildered look.

"I did not request this." His response was immediately irritated.

"You didn't tell me to stop bringing you lunch." She countered.

"I have been without such services for several days."

"Um, because I was locked in my room by your father. You were there that night."

"Indeed I was." Loki looked away, placing his quill back on the desk in order to free his hand for a dismissing wave. "You may leave now."

Kari rolled her eyes as soon as her back was turned and began walking towards the exit. Still unthankful, still rude and still up to no good. Had she really expected him to be a different person? Why did she even care? Breaking ties completely with the god of lies and mischief, ending the war of retaliation, would be so easy but on some level she kind of enjoyed it – if she was being honest with herself.

As she reached the door, her hand gripping the handle, Kari stopped as if a robot out of batteries. Her hangover was still in effect, if clearing, and so her brain was still trying to get up to speed with thinking. She turned, determined and began the walk back to the centre of the library; though this time with added haste. Loki's shoulders slumped as he heard her coming back, head turned to the heavens as if requesting the universe for patience whilst he again hid his work from view.

She didn't have time for whatever he had opened his mouth about to say. It wouldn't of mattered anyway, most likely a riddled insult and equal dashings of plausible threats.

"I need you." Her words caught him noticeably off guard as he froze mid syllable then shut his mouth for a communication restart.

"You, need me?" Oh this was grand, he was staring right at her amused by something he hadn't even heard explained yet. "Pray tell."

"You're basically the only person around here that seems to be into all this magic stuff." She flailed her hands around at several bookshelves to indicate the magical tomes on display. "And I need to learn something about it but I can't read any of these stupid books. So, I need you."

He was laughing, at her of course, but she had expected this reaction to some degree. Let him laugh it up all he wanted, Odin had said she would have to humble herself but at least the end result would hopefully not be her getting exiled. Still, it was a long shot, the mischief-maker not being the helpful kind of nice guy as his brother was but perhaps he would do it if only to tease and humiliate her in a newer way.

"Repeat that again." He smirked, elbow resting on his desk with chin on top of his palm to give her his full attention.

"I need you." She sighed.

"Again."

"I… need you." She was looking away now, this humbling stuff was really rather embarrassing.

"Once more."

"I. Need. You." She gave her words a little more conviction this time, eyes locked on his with the hope this would be the last time he would ask.

"No."

The word, his rejection hung in the air like a wandering apparition. He was watching her with a muted expression of aversion, until bored of her paling countenance, and leaned back into his chair, straightening his attire. Was he really going to say no after making her jump hoops? Of course he was, Loki was the biggest dick in all asgard.

"Leave, I have work to do." He dismissed her for a second time.

"But…" Her mind was whirling, desperately clawing for any strands of hope. "I- I'll never lick food on your plate again, I swear."

Loki jolted at her confession, his face forming an angry scowl as he stared down at the plate to his right then over to her petrified expression. Oh he was seriously angry, madder than the time she had been eavesdropping or dyed his hair blond. Maybe running away would have been the better option but she did still rather need him.

"It was only the grapes this time." She reached out towards his plate and removed the offending article.

"Leave. Now. Before I change my mind about the subtleties of murder."

She didn't need telling twice; or four times in this case. Without another word, Kari turned on her heels and scampered out of the library all too well aware of the eyes practically boring holes in her back.


	24. Chapter 24: Boy you know you want to

What was she going to do now? There had to be other people in asgard who studied magic; it was a bit farfetched for only one person out of an entire race to know the skill especially when there were so many books in the library. Someone had to have written them and it was unlikely to be Loki or he wouldn't search them so diligently for wisdom.

There was no point in crying about it now, she needed to finish clearing up the dining hall after the mess the men had left it in as usual. At some point she needed to make her way over to visit Thor as well for a recounting of Odin's heroics. Hopefully he wouldn't be too drunk by the time she reached him as he had been downing a rather large quantity of ale last she saw of him.

"Prue?"

"What is it?" The redhead answered, not pausing for a second her wiping down of the table.

"Are there… other people in asgard that do magic like Loki?"

"Like Loki?" Prue repeated the other woman's last words as if trying to fathom what the child was going on about. "Dark magic and trickery?"

"Well… uh… just magic in general?"

"Everybody has a little magic in them naturally." She shrugged as if this were common knowledge. "But if you mean a master of sorcery, then there are a few but none you should seek out."

"Why not?"

"Because," Prue seemed irritated, or simply fretful, pausing her wiping in order to give Kari a stern look, "power corrupts absolutely."

"So… they're all bad people?"

"Hungry for power. Users. Untrustworthy." She was back to her cleaning again. "Why are you suddenly interested?"

"I uh… Odin says I have to learn of magic as one of my penances."

"I will not speak badly of the allfather," Prue groaned, frowning at a stubborn fatty stain that eluded her scrubbing, "but sometimes he has more brawn than brain."

She had, had to laugh at that statement; Prue was often times unknowingly amusing in her opinions and what a great mound of them she had. They talked no more on the subject, neither woman having any further ideas on how best to appease the king's demand but there was certainly plenty of room to discuss love lives.

Egill was still keenly interested in the redhead, she in turn feigning only mild like of the warrior but the way she kept placing her hand over a gifted necklace told a different story. Woman was smitten and in serious denial. She even got into a particularly grumpy huff when Kari pointed out the subconscious actions and finally managed to dislodge the greasy stain from the table with the extra annoyance. There would be wedding bells, maybe Kari could be a bridesmaid – or whatever the asgardian equivalent was – and everything would be alright again for a change.

Kari snorted at the thought as she exited Thor's rooms. Oh had that been strange. The bimbo mostly had wanted to play games, of the board variety and kept stop starting his recounting of how Odin and his brothers forged the universe or something. From what little she had gathered, it sounded like the allfather had a serious god complex and they had not even reached the end of the tale before she needed to head back to her room for bed. Was this really going to work out?

Entering her room, Kari released a deep sigh that had felt caught in her chest for several months. She was a little hungry, having not eaten much all day due to the lingering hangover but it was too late now to grab a snack from the closed kitchens. A huge breakfast tomorrow would cheer her up and a big cuddle with Griffin now.

She smiled over at the tawny-eyed terror, curled on the windowsill with his tail tucked under his chin. He looked so peaceful, so happy and adorable all at once. She couldn't disturb him when he was like that, no doubt he would turn up on the bed during the night anyway so she decided to leave him be and get undressed. There was a knock at the door, however, catching her mid-unbuttoning of her blouse.

"One moment." She called out to her would-be-guest, clothes put back in place as she hovered to the door and opened it. "H-Heimdall?"

She was shocked, surprised, did he actually leave his post at any time other than when Odin ordered him? What was he doing here anyway? Oh my, did he have pretty eyes. Whatever, she didn't care, he was here now and her door opened wide for him to enter.

"You have failed to visit me." His deep rumbling tone filled her room as she closed the door behind him.

"Oh, right, uh… yeah I've been busy and uh…" Where was her brain when she needed it to formulate coherent sentences? "I didn't think you'd… you know… notice anyway." She shrugged, apologetic as he looked down at her from his full height taking in her words.

"I noticed your absence." There was such an oddness to his stare, as if he were looking right inside her and caressing her innocent feelings into full blown love.

"Oh." Was all she could muster up to say, her cheeks turning a violent red as he leaned a little lower.

"Never before have I longed f-" He began but his words were forced to a halt as she threw herself at him.

Their lips met, tangled and fought one another for dominance. Oh was he a good kisser, better than her imagination had dared believe anyway. She was desperate for air, the little she could inhale through her nose not quite adequate for the current task being performed but she didn't care; the lightheadedness only added to the buzz she felt throughout her body. Her arms were wrapped around his neck, standing on tippy-toes to reach a semblance of his height as he clung to her waist and back; lifting her slightly. A victory, his tongue slipping into her mouth as his bid for dominance finally consumed her and claimed the sweet prize of her inner taste.

Was this really happening? After so long of wanting this, was Heimdall actually in her room making out with her with some of the best kissing action she had ever received? One thing for sure, it better not be a ridiculously hot dream she was having.

He was walking her backwards now, heading towards the bed as he bit her lower lip and unfastened the buttons holding her blouse together. Was she supposed to try and remove his armor now? She didn't know how too but his control over her felt absolute as he peeled the blouse from her shoulders and admired the contents beneath.

She was about to say something, ask a silly question no doubt but was caught dumb by the loud banging on her door.


	25. Chapter 25: Sword play

Kari looked around Heimdall's shoulder at the door wondering who it could possibly be this time. As she looked back up at the guardian he was smirking, an unusual occurrence in all the time she had known him, which mutated the curiosity on her face into confusion. There was a second banging, whoever it was certainly seemed desperate for attention. She was about to head towards the door, leaving the comforting embrace of Heimdall's arms but he beat her too the gesture and turned away from her.

"I did not expect Heimdall to come so quickly." It was Loki's voice but coming from Heimdall's body.

Kari inhaled, suddenly, pulling her blouse closed around her as she watched the golden armored man stroll towards the door with some purpose. As he moved, his appearance shifted and morphed around him until he was in a very familiar shape that was indeed not Heimdall. She would have said something, made some noise but was glued to the spot clinging to her clothing with bulging eyes.

Without turning back once, Loki reached the door and opened it to be greeted by an angry looking Heimdall – probably the real one. Bewildered by what was happening she blinked several times to let the vision in front of her fully sink in. The pair were talking but she could not hear the words; her insides full of an overwhelming array of static. The guardian looked at her, an apologetic spark in his too pretty eyes before he followed after Loki as a man who means business.

What had just happened? Her feet began moving first, carefully bringing her to her open door, followed by an arm that shut out the world. Her love interest had just showed up and… They were kissing, he was undressing her, and they were about too… Loki was about too… She was about too… with Loki…

She suddenly felt very ill, the desire to vomit searching her stomach for contents but finding none. Dry heaving several times she sunk to her knees on the floor, one arm holding her up from the ground whilst the other clung to her chest holding the blouse closed. She felt horribly violated. He had played on her sketchy-love of another man and tried to use her. That was no simple prank, it wasn't just cruel, it was closer in kin to the sexual assault persuasion - a step too far, even for him.

Would he have actually gone through with it? Her stomach lurched again at the thought until smothered over from the chest squeezing racking of tears that soon crippled her body. She hated him. She really truly hated him now. The thought of poisoning his food came to mind as a serious option but she was in trouble enough because of him.

A soft mewing caught her attention as she looked up through blurry eyes. Griffin was watching her, worried golden orbs that blinked at her expectantly. She sat up on her knees, pulling the compliant cat up into her arms as he began to purr a reassuring sound. It was not enough though, her cheek buried in his fur as the flow of tears still came accompanied with sounds of a wounded nature.

Apparently Loki had actually gotten into a little trouble after his stunt. Heimdall had been very annoyed and Odin even more so at the guardian's discomfort – Kari's feelings on the matter were of little interest to anyone it seemed. The imposter had been sent off to work for an alchemist in the city as punishment but as annoyed as he looked leaving the palace, the whole situation still stank of favoritism. Perhaps Odin had sensed her murder vibes towards the prince and sent him to chill in the city until she calmed down?

What of Heimdall? She could hardly ever go to see him ever again – ever – now. The memory of his apologetic look made her cringe on the inside. He felt sorry for her and she wasn't even sure in what way. It was too embarrassing and she too much a coward to walk all the way down to his lair and say something.

"Lift your arms." Fandral tapped her elbow with the side of his blade, causing her to lift it once again.

"Right, sorry." She started the practice stance again, a wooden sword held in her right hand.

"Slower, let your body memorize the movement and learn to adjust your weight accordingly."

Her grandfather was watching her like a hawk, occasionally correcting her misplaced limbs. Learning swordsmanship was a lot like pilates with a stick so far. She thought she was getting quite good at it now in her third lesson but the look on Fandral's face, that she sporadically glimpsed, said otherwise. He had made several comments about her floppy arms this session alone and the frustration between them was certainly not improving things. The problem was, the sword was heavy and her arms tired from working all day lifting full jugs and things. She probably should have biceps of steel from her job alone but the muscle use was entirely different when holding a sword. Different parts of her arms not as used, weaker parts, were being forced into action whilst more frequently used ones were feeling the fatigue of the day.

"Again." Fandral ordered, this time standing opposite her and joining in with the stance she was practicing.

It put her to shame watching him, his whole body moved in an elegant, honed dance with the blade. Kari, on the other hand, looked more like a potato trying to peel itself. Frustrated, shown up, she groaned letting her stick drop to the ground so she could lean upon it like an old woman.

"Why have you stopped, my dear?" Fandral questioned, continuing his own practice with ease.

"I'm no good at this." She rubbed her sore sword arm, trying to give herself a massage.

"You are improving."

"Really? You keep giving me a disappointed look when you think I can't see."

"That is fanciful talk." He frowned then smiled while coming to a halt at the end of his stance. "I had expected to much perhaps, a protégé of the blade in my foolishness. I have to remind myself you are also Francesca's descendant and what a tumble of limbs that woman was. It was a chore to keep her upright and not twisting her ankles."

"I'm not that much of a klutz." Kari chuckled at the thought of a bumbling grandmother. "I got pretty good ankles too, never twisted them once. Broke my leg though… well it was the horse that broke my leg when he drop his whole weight on it." She cringed at the sudden memory of pain.

"Which leg?" Fandral was suddenly interested, looking between her two legs as if trying to find the culprit through the product of elimination.

"Uh, this one." She lifted her left leg slightly and followed through with a point.

Fandral squatted down, lifting her foot onto his knee as he felt along the bone. She wasn't sure whether to ask him what he was doing or not; her grandfather deep in thought as his thumb traced her calf bone then halted suddenly.

"Here?" He pushed lightly on a slight dent.

"Yeah, and below it a little further down too." She raised an eyebrow at the odd concern – it wasn't as if he could do anything about it now.

"This changes things." He placed her foot back down and stood eyeing her awkward stance. "Try adjusting some of your weight to the other leg and turn your left foot in a fraction."

He was studying her footwork now, indicating she start her practice stance again with the added changes. At first she hardly noticed the difference but as she neared the middle of the routine there was an obvious improvement in her footwork. It felt easier, her leg ached less as she moved into the turn but it still did nothing for her arms other than to remove one annoyance so she could concentrate on getting through the other. The arm strength would come in time she assumed, for now she was doing much better if Fandral's prideful grin was anything to go by.


	26. Chapter 26: Balder the Brave

"I still don't quite get this. So… Your great-grandfather is THE Mr whippy-frost giant god of everything teeth chattering cold and your grandfather ran off with his little girl." Kari was trying desperately to get to grips with a lackluster retelling of Ymir the frosty king and Bor the prom-night virgin thief, Thor had been telling her over a lot of wine. "Then, Ymir, got daddy with a shotgun angry but your grandfather kicked his butt and somehow your grandmother was ok with that?"

"You twist and turn such interesting fables from my words." Thor was torn between laughing and thinking too deeply.

"No, I think I just see through the wool over your eyes and-" She was cut off as a knock came from the door.

"In!" Thor declared so as to get whatever nuisance waited over quickly.

"It is I, Balder the brave, returned." A man, Balder, entered with an intimidating level of assurance.

"Balder, my friend!" Thor was on his feet, greeting the man in the centre of the room with a colossal amount of bromantic hug and patting. "Come, sit! Join us and recount your wanderings."

"I shall if it so please." He followed the god of thunder back towards the sitting area but paused before taking his own seat with a nod to Kari. "But who is this? I recognize her not from the courtiers."

"That is Fandralkin." Thor was grinning, waiting knowingly for the look of surprise that would befall the warriors features.

"Fandralkin?" Unable to disappoint Thor, Balder's eyes trailed her like a confused penguin.

"Fandral's granddaughter."

"Kari. My name is Kari." She was feeling exacerbated by the name-calling and visual judging by the newcomer.

"I was unaware Fandral the dashing had children." Balder was now deeply curious, having missed something important during his adventures.

"So was he, my friend, until his daughters daughter appeared in our realm from midgard."

"Midgard?"

"Aye, she is of that realm." Thor shrugged as if her mystery were a long lost interest now grown stale and boring. "The allfather decrees her stay and so here she is."

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Kari Fandralkin." His fist was too his chest, head inclined in a polite bow before Balder took a chair between the two.

"Love the outfit." She blurted out, not entirely sure what to say but having come to the realization when he sat that their clothing oddly matched – purple, blue and grey.

"Thank you." He snorted, noting the same as the god of thunder poured him a drink. "It would appear we are of a similar mind."

"That is true." Thor was suddenly animated with pending tales to tell. "Fandralkin is one of the bravest maiden's I have encountered throughout the nine realms. She has stood up to the god of thunder in combat," Thor leaned in closer to his friend, whilst Kari immediately covered her eyes so as not to see the lies surfacing, "outmatched with the blade and thrown aside many times but such bravery would not stop her from rising against I again. I was forced to forfeit our bout or end her."

"Truly?" She could tell Balder was staring right at her but as long as she could not see him behind her fingers she could believe she were invisible.

"Truly, my friend." Thor was at it again; she could hear the giddy-up glee in the man-child's voice only beginning to reach its peak. "During the feast of Ostara, a great spider of Niffleheim escaped into the palace, ravaged its way through several guards and servants until thwarted by Fandralkin armed only with a tray and her bravery to defend a fallen serving wench."

"Prue, her name is Prue, not 'serving wench'." Kari gritted her teeth as Thor waved off her interruption of his tale telling.

"Some nights passed, Fandralkin dined as my guest at the table of Odin, in celebrating her day of birth," Kari groaned as he continued, this part she really did not want to hear about again – ever, "there was a disagreement between Loki and herself that the allfather made attempt to end but undeterred, Fandralkin instead stood against the king, my father, despite the consequences."

"That was all Loki's fault." She mumbled but ignored by the two gods gossiping.

"Consequences?" Balder seemed perplexed the midgardian was even sharing the same room as him now.

"Father had thought to banish her to some distant and sure death for the insult but was persuaded to a lesser punishment."

"The king's lenience is surprising, especially with his growing frustration of the human race and their continuing defiance of him."

"It is not their defiance but their disbelief that saddens the allfather." Thor corrected. "Fandralkin's defiance is only proof that she at least is not ignorant to his presence."

"You know it's rude to talk about someone like they're not even in the room?" Kari was getting a little frustrated at the god's ignorance herself. "Besides, it's still all your brothers fault."

"Do not fake that you two are not in the midst's of tricksters games." Thor laughed. "My favourite of your counters was when you somehow changed the colour of my brothers hair from black to gold. It was, for a short time, his most attractive appearance."

"We are not 'in the midst's of tricksters games'." She fired back. "Your brother is just a huge dick and I can't outright kill him to make him stop."

"It is dangerous to meddle with Loki." Balder commented, his tone somewhat worried for the weaker midgardian.

"Worry not, Balder." Thor dislodged the warrior's anxiety with an audible slap on the back. "Their jests and tricks appear to be the strange courting of mischievous lovers."

There was a loud 'bang' as Kari stood, simultaneously slamming her half-full cup of wine down on the table besides her. The two men stared in her direction, eyes greeted with her retreating back as she stomped from the room with the added slam of the door. Both frowned, looking to one another for clarification of what they had done to invoke such a display but blissfully ignorant between them.

Wandering aimlessly was getting her nowhere today. She should have been with Thor and Volstagg listening to stories about vanquishing demons but her pride was still a little sore from the Loki teasing the night before. How could he have said that? Implied some sort of sick blossoming romance between herself and that cretin? Not in a million and one years. Wasn't everyone aware that she was into Heimdall anyway? Well, 'was' being the operative word in that statement after what had happened that night with Loki.

She was unable to look at the guardian again, even when she got past the thought of him catching her about to sleep with his doppelganger. On some level she partially blamed him, more so she felt sick at the sight of him as it reminded her of Loki with his hands all over her. It was stupid, she knew but at the same time, Kari felt powerless to stop herself hating them both in unequal measures.

Finally, she had removed the collage of Heimdall's from her wall, last night, at the realization. It had made her feel better, a weight shifting from her shoulders and joining the torn pile of paper on the floor. Of course, she had a cry too and snuck into the kitchen to pilfer cinnamon rolls, in place of chocolate, but that went without saying.

As her thoughts simmered down again, Kari paused at the entrance to Frigga's garden and leaned up against the open archway – careful not to set a foot inside uninvited. It smelt as lovely as ever, perfect blooms in every conceivable space and the gentle trickle of fountains hidden deeper inside. Just the sort of place she longed to curl up in and sleep until all her troubles had passed.

"Kari?" The question startled her but the owner instantly quelled such apprehension with her delicate touch upon Kari's shoulder.

"Uh, yeah, hey Frigga." She smiled back at the asgardian queen, being indicated to follow the woman inside the forbidden zone towards a bench.

"How goes your quest for knowledge?" Frigga sat, placing her small accompaniment of gardening tools besides her.

"Uh… Alright I guess." She shrugged claiming a spot next to the queen. "Fandral is teaching me to wield a sword, but he only makes me do routines so far. Volstagg and Thor are trying to get stories into my head but it's hard to understand them sometimes. They get really carried away with reminiscing at random points and forget where they were up to."

"That is quite normal I assure you." Frigga chuckled at the memories of many years filled with boastful men arguing out stories between them. "Knowledge and understanding will come in time, be patient."

"Hmmm. Yeah."

"What of your final assignment? Magic?"

"Er, that's a no go." Kari suddenly squirmed, her Achilles heel that would no doubt get her banished in the end. "When I spoke to Prue about it, she said that sorcerers were kind of evil and not to talk to them and I can't read any of the books so…"

"You know not the meaning of words?" Frigga seemed a little puzzled but really how was a midgardian suppose to be taught how to read an old god language.

"I tried talking to Loki about it but…" She trailed off, obviously uncomfortable about their last encounter still.

"He was such a sweet boy, he is still, but now caught up in a mans jealousy and fear." Frigga mused, laying a hand on the other woman's shoulder. "They do not like us to know just how weak their hearts truly are."

"I don't think he fears anything."

"I believe he fears everything."

"Hmmm." Kari bit her lip as she mulled the man in questions mother's words over.

"Do not allow yourself to be swept up in your fears."

"I'll try." She felt suddenly apologetic as she came to the conclusion that Frigga was always burdening herself with quelling the other woman's fears.

"Good." Frigga stood, reaching for her tools. "Then come and help me tend the roses and I shall teach you a little the meaning of words."


	27. Chapter 27: Kari the melancholy

Even on her day off from work she could not rest. Fandral had her in the training yard again from early morning, despite her protests and many 'go away' s issued from under blankets, whilst trying to have a sleep in. She was tired, sweaty and miserable under the midday sun when he finally let her take a break for a while. All the running around the perimeter, with her grandfather over taking her several times, would have been worthy of a good cry if she wasn't already dehydrated from all the moisture her body had exuded into her now clinging t-shirt. She swore she had lost weight after the last few weeks of hell but then gained it back again in muscle she hoped wouldn't start becoming unflattering; it was like she was in one of those horrible problem teen boot camps on TV.

The thought had crossed her mind several times that perhaps her grandfather was really a demon. She certainly wished he would remind himself now and then she was human and not a god – or a man for that matter of fact. At least he was finally letting her hold an actual blade now and take swings at him; even if he did block every blow it was still entertaining to imagine she might actually hit him at some point.

"That is enough sitting around being idle." Fandral was hovering somewhere to her left, checking the balance of his blade for the umpteenth time. "Rise and defend yourself."

"I'm tired!" She realized she sounded like an over-exaggerating whiney teenager but with the amount her body was aching she couldn't careless anymore. "I only just sat down!"

"It is the duty of the strong to protect the weak, to strengthen them that they too may become strong. And that we may accomplish here if you would only stand and defend yourself."

"Oh really, am I getting condescending granddad again? Because he's so my favourite of your split personalities." The sarcasm in her voice was oozing like congealing ten-year-old syrup. "Could you try and remember for a few minutes I'm your granddaughter not grandson and once in a while I would like to sleep because you know, it's something we kind of need to do on midgard and I have to wake up earlier than you most days having gone to bed very late. So really, is sitting down for five more minutes without a lecture or sword pointed at me really going to kill you?"

"Sif does not complain so."

"Sif isn't human!" Kari snapped, covering the top of her head with her hands as she stared at her knees. "Or me…"

He was about to say something, tap her on the arm with the side of his blade but thankfully became distracted by a wandering figure entering the yard. It was a good thing too, she was about ready to take his weapon and shove it somewhere uncomfortable and that probably would not have gone down well with a lot of people. Why was he doing this to her anyway? Right, to help her not get banished to distant and monster filled lands. She really needed to keep reminding herself of that but was the sheer volume of practice really necessary? She had been improving and there was still another ten plus months to teach her. Better now than later, that saying was really annoying and one she always had rebelled at by leaving her old home as messy as possible.

"Balder the brave!" Fandral was excitably laughing as the other warrior came to a stop besides him.

"It's not difficult to be brave when you're built like a god." Kari muttered under her breath.

There was an uncomfortable pause; silence descending down on the trio as she suddenly felt the burning fixation of eyes focused on her. Had they just heard that? Of course they did, they were asgardian with super-asgardian-eaves-dropping-powers.

"Do not pay mind of the child, Balder." Fandral turned his back to her for the time being. "She is troublesome this day."

"I listen not." Balder dismissed her words and person with equal indifference and moved to follow the other swordsmen across the yard.

They left her alone, which was nice of them, in order to test their mettle against one another. It was the clashing of metal that finally made her look up from her knees; two warriors obviously very good with a blade each going at it like a pair of dancing bears. Intimidating but also strangely beautiful to watch.

The sight relaxed her, muscles in her back finally straining less from mental stress and relieving the dull headache gradually creeping upwards in pressure. She hadn't even been aware of the pain, entirely, until it had finally alleviated. Maybe that was why she was in such a bad mood? Or the fact her cycle was in flow and nobody on Asgard could make a McChicken sandwich or chocolate fudge cake. Oh she was drooling just at the thought of it. Could also be the teasing and her increasing dislike of Balder. Who goes around calling themselves a stupid name like 'Balder the brave' anyway? Who was she kidding, they all had ridiculous names – Fandral the dashing, Hogun the grim, Thor the thunder god, Loki the giant dick. Maybe she should give herself a nickname too, if only to stop people calling her 'Fandralkin'.

"Kari the melancholy." She chuckled at the idea and tilted her head to the side to admire a particularly beasty block by Balder.

Fandral was fast, a lot spriter than she would ever be, but Balder was like a rock with legs. Their roles seemed defined; Fandral on the attack, Balder on the defense, footwork forming a quick paced waltz, a turn, a slash, a block and finally victory. Or in this case a stalemate as both men held the pointed end of a weapon to each. They laughed at the dilemma, Kari's forehead wrinkling into a headshaking amusement as they talked one another into withdrawing his weapon first and declaring defeat.

Two boys, two silly boys in a man shaped suit. Frigga was right about their hearts being their weakness but not because of fear and jealousy. Men are their hearts and here she was as a woman living in her brain, over thinking everything. She wasn't mad at them, she wasn't mad at the McChicken sandwich shortage or even the early morning jogging. No, she was upset because Loki was coming home soon.

"Time to massage my heart back to life." She murmured, getting up from her seated position and stalking her way to the two men getting ready for a second bout. "Granddad, let me have a go!"


	28. Chapter 28: Sleipnir

Neighing, that constant stream of horse noises coming from the stables by the training yard was infuriating. Did the beasts not realize they terrified her? She was alone, trying to practice her stances and routines whilst Fandral was away tending to business. Apparently he had to go see a dwarf and help Volstagg fell a giant boar that was rumored to taste of rainbows or something; no doubt there would be a maiden to rescue at some point too. If only she could stop jumping every time a loud whinny worked its way into her ears but it was proving hopeless. She was paranoid, looking over her shoulder to make sure nothing four or eight legged was going to sneak up on her – or gallop.

A chorus of neighing suddenly broke the unsettling quiet; several horses apparently laughing at a joke one of the others had whinnied aloud. Kari dropped her sword at the sound, knees caving until she was squatting with hands pressed to her ears. Now she was shaking, like a small child hearing thunder for the first time. Why did they have to be so damn noisy when Fandral was not around? Everything would have been all right if her grandfather were at least about with his protective aura – which she was beginning to believe emitted from his horrible moustache.

Taking several deep breaths, she calmed herself with mumbled words of 'it's ok', until able to stand once again. It was stupid, this was stupid and there was nothing she could do about it save run away. Kari retrieved her sword, her heart thudding loudly in her ears, as she turned to stare at the stable with a portion of residual courage left floating on the top of a lake overflowing with fear. Frigga's words, not for the first time, echoed dully in her head picking up quality and volume as they repeated on loop until overwhelming. 'Do not allow yourself to be swept up in your fears.'

Yeah right, who was she kidding, Kari was the biggest bag of fears and grass stains this side of the bifrost. Spooked by horses, puking from wormhole rides, screaming at cockroaches and almost wetting her pants every time Odin looked at her. Really, could her life get anymore embarrassing? Well, Thor liked to think she was some sort of brave maiden, despite most of his retellings of her adventures being about times she was terrified out of her mind and just kind of going with instinct. The likelihood he was just teasing her was high on the list of plausibility as well.

That was all fine and whatever, other people's opinions, but what really mattered was her own belief in herself. Her life, her rules and her responsibility to do something about it. Oh, why was she even bothering? Right, because she was sick and tired of being scared of stupid horses. Kari groaned at her inner monologue, she couldn't even win an argument with herself. Still, it would be worth it, maybe, hopefully.

Sheathing her, my little warrior, sword back on her belt Kari sucked in a long deep breath to steady her nerves. Fists clenching and unclenching over and over until finally her feet began to move towards the stable. Just a quick visit, maybe pet a beast and leave; they would be all locked up anyway so the danger was pretty low.

She skittered towards the door, peering round the edge at the piles of hay within and surveyed the long walkway going directly down the centre of the structure. It was empty, apart from the horses of course, but none of the hands seemed to be around. Biting her lip, Kari tiptoed around the doorframe and began sneaking slowly forward inside; as if being quiet would make the creatures less likely to break open their stalls and come chasing after her. It was like being in a horror movie, except all the lights were on and nobody had a knife.

Slowing down even further, until taking pigeon steps, her breath became swift and shallow as her wide eyes took in the closeness of the first stall. She could hear something horrible inside munching on something – probably old bones just to rub in its evil nature. She blinked several times, swallowing down saliva to keep her dry throat from constricting any further than her nerves were compressing it. Just a quick look, size it up, fill empowered and then walk away with some dignity.

Painfully slowly, hands gripped to her chest to still her racing heart, Kari peered around the edge of the stalls door and had a good gawp within. That eight-legged monster was in there devouring his way through a large bundle of hay boredly. She snorted at the image; huge, weird and scary as he was the lackluster look of tedium in the horse's eyes really did remind her of Loki. Maybe that woman, Ryder, was right about this being the trickster's son. But before that line of thinking could transcend any new levels of wonder something new about the stable made her spine turn to jelly.

The 'clop, clop, clop' of hooves coming closer. Kari hissed a whining sound and turned slowly to view the impending problem. A great big brown mare was being guided towards her, the walking rider paying her no mind until he reached close enough to halt and offer up the reigns.

"See that she has carrots and oats for her troubles."

"What?" Kari was staring at the horse - which was in turn staring back at her - and backed herself directly against Sleipnir's stall in a bid to get some distance. "No way! You can't give that to me!"

"Oh." Balder looked down for the first time realizing whom he was speaking to. "Kari Fandralkin, I was unaware of your dual employment in the stable and kitchens."

"I don't work here." She shook her head as if he were speaking madness.

"Then I was mistaken." He frowned, confused at her presence before continuing on down the path of the structure in search of a free stall.

Just as she was starting to like him, he tries to hand her a horse as if the shakiness between them could get any worse. She was sure she was dead pale now, her face felt rather cold and clammy and her finger nails were getting a serious chewing. This really had not been a good idea, at all. She sighed, leaning her back fully against the stall door and tried to regain some composure before…

Something brushed against the top of her head, sweet, grassy breath huffed and blasted downward into her eyes as the horse looming above her sniffed his visitor. She couldn't move, she couldn't speak and she sure as hell refused to blink just in case. Sleipnir took a testing nibble at her hair before finding the taste unpalatable and worked his way lower to her ear with several louder snorts through his nostrils. It was not until the horse began lipping her cheek that she finally made a noise, though it was of a somewhat constricted giggling nature at the tickling sensation he was eliciting.

Kari reached up, tentatively, hand sprayed across the beast's silky nose as she tried to push him away and dually skitter to the side out of reach. However, her hair was still partially tangled in between his teeth and the pain of tugging away kept her rather rooted as she desperately tried to loosen his hold on her. Oh why her?

"Stupid horse." She hiccoughed trying desperately to refrain from crying. "Let go of me. Please?"

"You seem distressed." Balder had reappeared like a hapless hero in search of good deeds, a hand patting the side of Odin's steed before untangling her from his clutches. "If horses scare you so, why come to a stable?"

"Argh, thanks." Kari darted several steps away from the stall, fingers running through her hair to clear some of the knotted clumps Sleipnir had caused. "I uh… you know… facing my problems."

"A noble cause." He chuckled, not unkindly, as he rubbed down the length of the stallion's head and received several affectionate head butts in response. "Sleipnir is bigger than any of his kind but with his size comes an even bigger heart." Balder pushed the horse back in order to unlock the stall door.

"What are you doing?" She was wary, her tone laced with terror and scolding.

"Come, be not afraid." He made a snatch for her wrist, pulling her towards the stall and the gently snorting beast within.

"No, I-I-I think I'll just…" She squeaked, being led like a horse to water and having no intention of drinking.

"You are safe." She didn't like the way Balder was talking to her like a horse whisperer; she was not the horse in this situation.

She shut her eyes, a high-pitched sound caught in her throat as the warrior encased her. Backing up only meant bumping into him and his arms held her shoulders tight enough to reassure and keep her from scurrying away in the same instance. She could hear it, the monster with eight-legs swishing his great long tail and grunting at her presence in his home. Breath ragged and uneven, her body quivering at the proximity to danger as tears slowly welled up behind closed eyelids.

Balder slid one hand down her arm towards the wrist until he had control of her limb like a puppeteer. Upwards he guided her until she felt the smooth nature of a well-groomed coat beneath her fingertips. So soft, so silky, so warm and relaxing like petting Griffin after a hard day. Her shoulder began to slump a little, tense muscles relaxing as her breathing steadied and her hand moved of its own accord with the aid of the warriors stroking movements.

Kari opened her eyes, a grin plastered on her face slowly growing in intensity until a curt chuckle breached her lips. She was doing it, petting a scary horse, in its stall and without a barrier between them. This was more than she had expected; an edge to her fear sanded down somewhat.

Then of course, hands had appeared around her waist and without any warning she was lifted as if weighing no more than a loaf of bread. She squawked and squealed her shock and trepidation, forced to mount the beast that just stood there as if he were cool with what was happening – well she certainly was not. Kari practically lay on Sleipnir's back, arms wrapped around as much of his neck as she could reach to keep from falling.

"Get me down!" She angrily whispered, not wanting to spook the horse with her voice.

"When a rider has fallen, he must get back on his horse again, or prove the world the horse is master." Balder was walking off, acting as if he could not see the wide-eyed terror of the woman he had just manhandled onto an eight-legged stallion.

"Come back!" Her voice had raised several octaves. "Don't leave me!"

"Bridle." He commented, reappearing a second later with the mentioned equipment in hand.

"I can't ride him."

"Just a short walk, you will not fall."

Balder was ignoring the way she clumsily clung to the back of the horse, sorting the bridle in his hands before offering up the bit for Sleipnir to take. The stallion obliged happily, eager to get out of his confines for a spell as the warrior tugged and tightened straps into place. As he finished, sliding the reigns through his fingers until reaching Kari's hands, he helped her to slowly right herself on the back of the horse and steadied her in place until she found her balance. It was a little difficult to keep sitting straight what with the stallion being so big and her legs shorter than necessary. She slipped a couple of times, each being held before falling and coaxed back into place. It was a balancing act she had to get used to again, the first time had seemed so much easier than this but then again that time had ended with a broken leg.

"Ready?" He watched her, biting her lip nervously before her eyes locked with his and a nod was given.

Gripping the side of the bridle, Balder began guiding Sleipnir forward and out of the stall gently. He could hear her making muffled startled sounds behind him but her distress was a great deal less than it had been previously. They walked on, stallion snorting sporadically as his ears perked from anticipation of the outside world and all its wonders.

Kari was swaying left to right with the horses movements, she could feel herself turning green at the continuous motion. Four legs was bad enough but eight only made the rocking that much worse as it sort of rippled as well. At least the swirling in her stomach was distracting her from the fact she was on a horse.

"I'm feeling kind of sea sick." She groaned as they exited the stable, the 'clop' of hooves beneath her becoming muffled amongst the dirt.

"Move your body into the motion." Balder suggested giving his non-horse companion a reassuring pat on the leg.

She gave it a go, swaying into each tilting motion of the stallions movements but as little as it helped it was then increasing the discomfort of riding without a saddle. Kari hissed softly, trying to readjust herself from the uncomfortable pressure of Sleipnir's spine pressing against her crotch but then gasped finding herself suddenly released from the warrior's care. He'd let go; he'd actually let go and just stood there watching her watching him as Sleipnir continued walking in a straight line. What did he expect her to do, ride the horse? Yes, that was probably what he expected if the smile plastered across his face was anything to go by.

"You are doing well, do not be afraid to use the reigns." Cheerleader Balder charmed her on. "Lead him where you wish to go."

"I wish to go down!"

"That is not a direction he is capable." Balder chuckled, amused at her bumbling nature as she tried to steer the stallion beneath her to the left only to make him turn in a circle and make an irritated sound.

"I'm going to fall!"

"You will not."

"I will!"

"You will not."

"Stop arguing with me and help!"

"Relax, Kari Fandralkin, the day is w-"

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?" A very angry sounding voice shouted from across the yard followed by an equally furious brown haired woman known as Ryder.

Sleipnir was suddenly agitated at the shouting and the continued hostility of the stable hand now yelling at a placating Balder trying to explain why a random servant was riding on Odin's horse. The stallion began pawing at the ground, ears prostrate and nostrils flared until finally he let out a deafening neighing and shifted his weight to the back legs in order to lift and stomp down on the ground in spooked frustration. Kari squealed at the display, unable to balance herself via the missing stirrups and instead had to rely on pressing her thighs tighter around the horses midsection whilst simultaneously gripping tight of his mane. That had not been the best idea in the world as the warhorse had taken the abdominal pressure as a command to canter at a surprising speed onwards. Of course, this meant she clung tighter still to both the body and mane between her fingers, screaming all the while as Sleipnir whinnied and became increasingly annoyed at the tugging of his hair.

He came to a halt, abruptly, bucking at the irritation on his back and sending her life flashing before her eyes. It was happening again, she was going to get thrown, have something broken, bitten and stomped on by an eight-legged horse. As if life was not already cruel enough.

Sleipnir threw himself back onto hind legs for a second time, clearly quite livid at her now digging her nails into his skin and practically screaming in his ears. As his front collided earth shatteringly with the floor again she felt her grip loosen at the shockwave passing through her body and causing her teeth the chatter. There was no time to adjust herself, reaffirm her hold as the stallion smoothly flicked his back legs and flexed his spine into a series of high jumping bucks. She had lost, yet again, to a horse. Flung high up into the air like a jumbled up rag doll and left to the mercy of the solid ground hurtling towards her. She hadn't time to scream though she tried, sucking in a preemptive inhalation but was too late to do anything but squeeze her eyelids tightly shut.

She huffed audibly as her body collided with something that postponed gravity and her collision with the ground. Caught up in arms, hands tightening around her body to keep her steady as she regained her senses and learned to breathe again. Her eyelids fluttered open, heartbeat racing enough to deafen as she stared at clothing she could not recognize. She didn't care, she was petrified, shaking uncontrollably as she reached out grasping onto her saviors chest and proceeded to cry all over him. It was a loud horrible sound of terrified sobbing, muffled into a green tunic, which filled her ears.

His hold on her adjusted, a reassuring pat on the back as she clung tighter still to him. The fabric of his attire was starting to darken from the moisture pooling from her eyes; he giving a great sulking sigh at the predicament.

"Is she unharmed?" Balder's voice, laced with concern, drifted along with the rushing warrior.

"Only frightened." Loki answered back, undaunted, Kari coughing through her bawling as she became aware of whose arms she currently resided in. "Karian Motter, always finds away into my arms." He laughed though his tone lacked any humor in it.

She tried to push away, incased in his hold and equally unwilling to loosen her grip on him despite her dislike. Her vision was blurred, tears still streaking her cheeks as she sniffled and peered up at the green eyes studying her. It really was him, the heroic bastard. She tried to frown, tried to will herself to reach up and slap him but instead, upon glancing over at Sleipnir being guided back to the stables by Ryder, Kari found herself enthralled in another wave of misery and buried her head back in his safety.


	29. Chapter 29: Drink me

Everything was numb, she felt as if floating or nothing more than a ghost caught up in a mist. Where was she? Kari blinked, perhaps for the first time in a long while, and continued to stare at the polished floor. This was inside, she knew this fact but her memory was unable to add any further information or description. Warmth spread through her palms and up her arms that she could not quite place until finally remembering it were possible to tilt her head and look down at the area. A cup - gentle wafts of steam curling upwards towards her carrying the scent of something familiar.

Her mind continued to be blank of all knowledge spare the odd basic data. Sensation was returning somewhat slowly, she could feel her chest again, a heart beat slow and steady pounding out a reassurance she was not as dead as she felt. She blinked again, something heavy on her shoulders weighing her down but also comforting – a blanket, that's what it was called. Softness below her; swirling patterns on silk fabric that mesmerized her in their reassuring complexity and cushioned her snuggly on a couch.

An idea had surfaced, or perhaps just a basic need or desire, lie down and go to sleep. As much as she might wish to do so, however, she still was incapable of reasoning how to achieve such a simple task.

"Drink your tea." Loki was standing in front of her, a solitary finger indicating the cup grasped in her hands but she only blinked at the order not truly understanding. When had he appeared? "Kari-"

"Did you really fuck a horse?" It was the only line of thought that she could clutch hold of in the mist of her mind.

"What?"

"Then give birth to Sleipnir?"

"Wha- oh."

"That's sick man."

"You have misunderstood or been told a great falsehood."

"What's it like being the mother of a horse?" She was staring at his knees, her mind only focused on tumbling out the stream of questions and statements without absorbing any of his responses. "Did you have tits or udders or whatever horses have because that would just be so very weird?"

"Kari, focus." He snapped his fingers in front of her nose - like one might do to a dog during training.

"Huh?" She blinked at the sound and movement, some of the ringing in her ears dissipating as neurons fired and took over once again. "Where am I?"

"In my rooms." Loki was squatting, green capturing her blue and holding her gaze steady. "Drink your tea."

"Is it poison?"

"It is not." He reached down, strong hands encasing her own and helping to lift the cup to her lips. "The tea will help, you are in shock, Motter."

"Am I?" She blinked again, his eyes still holding hers focused as the edge of the cup reached her lips and she swallowed down a sip of the warm liquid. "He has your eyes."

"Who does?"

"Sleipnir."

Loki sighed a long tiring sound. It was not the first time he had heard this particular rumor spreading around but definitely the first time someone had made an accusation about the eyes.

"I assisted my brother, Thor, in the creation of Sleipnir from the bones of his beloved steeds wrongly devoured by starving humans." He tried to explain, coaxing the pale woman to take several more sips of her drink until she was managing the action by herself. "I am not his mother."

"Oh." She breathed, her breath warm from the tea and insides buzzing with further sensation.

He shook his head, peeling the empty cup from her hands and turned to set it down on a low table. There was a light 'thump' behind him, on closer inspection the sound having been created by a body dead weighting onto the couch. Loki snorted, unamused by the situation and aggravated at being further detained. It had been a laughable surprise to return from the city and catch the bizarre show outside the stables. An even greater opportunity to hold something new over the girl's head when she had fallen and yet the day had not stopped giving when he got the chance to further irritate Balder by swaggering off with the damsel. Now, however, he had a carer's role and just at the point he thought she might be well enough to leave she had collapsed in a mess of tangled hair in his room.

Loki hummed a low rumble deep within his throat, lifting her dangling legs to join her and tugging the blanket out from the twist it was in around her torso. As long as she was asleep, she would not be pestering him with ridiculous questions and he could unpack the miracles of alchemy he had returned with.

When next she awoke, Kari was feeling decidedly better than before but now her bladder was full of tea. She groaned pushing herself up on the couch and letting the blanket draped over her descend by its own volition. It was still light outside but just barely as she noted the pink nature of the sky and lowering sun on the horizon. Loki was further to her left, tinkling vials and bottles over several tables paying her no mind.

She really needed to pee. No use in fighting it, she hissed from the stiffness in her body and stood before speedily pattering barefoot to the bathroom. It probably would have been polite to ask first, seeing as is was a prince's private lavatory but really he was to blame for bringing her here and feeding her tea. There was no way she would have made it to another toilet anyway. Also, where were her shoes?

Upon exiting the bathroom, Kari began searching the main room, her socks keeping her warm from the coldness of the floor. On closer inspection she found her footwear under the couch, sitting down to put them back on as she then realized her sword was missing. She growled at the frustration of having to start looking again, being in a room with Loki was very confusing after the mismatch of their last two encounters. One minute horrible, next minute lovely.

"You are awake." Loki, having looked away from his work for the first time, commented.

"Yeah… w-where's my sword?" Kari bit her lip, not quite managing to look him in the eye.

"In your room, I thought it would be best if you had not a weapon at hand."

"Around you, you mean?"

"Precisely." He grinned a toothy smile, swirling the contents of a beaker round and round.

"And whose fault is that?"

"I saved you, remember?" He shrugged.

"Yeah well… you also… what you did was… it was… it was heartless, cruel and horrible!"

"Your saliva on my meals, I thought it was only fair that you too sampled my fluids."

"Ewww." She cringed at his use of 'fluids'; sure he meant a lot more than just spit. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I am quite healthy I assure you." He was smirking again – the bastard. "Care to try this concoction?"

"What?" She eyed the beaker of pale blue liquid between his fingertips. "No!"

"I assure you it is not poison."

"No!" Her voice was low and dangerous.

"If you drink this, I will teach you a little of magic." He offered up an incentive, followed by an insult. "Not that I believe you could ever wield it."

"Your mother is already teaching me to read it."

"And you believe reading will be enough to satisfy the allfather?"

They locked eyes, a smug, genuine twinkle heightening the depth of green persuasion he was emitting towards her. Perhaps he was right in this case. Odin was after perfection after all.

"It's not poison?" Wary as she was, a form of confidence drifted into her tone with ease.

"It is not."

"And you promise to teach me?"

"I promise as a prince of Asgard, bound by my honor." He sounded sarcastic and theatrical but held his clenched fist to his chest as if he really meant it.

"Hmmm…" Kari squinted at the mischief-maker, sizing him up as she continued to mull it over. "What exactly does it do?"

"Drink it and we shall find out."

"What, you don't know?"

"Drink it, do not drink it." Loki indicated the door and beaker in turn as he gave his ultimatum. "Decide."

"Argh…" She reached a hand out to receive the beaker. "Fine."

Hesitating, Kari stared at the liquid with some trepidation at arms reach and gave a great sigh. She should not drink it, especially with Loki staring so intently and holding a notebook and quill in hand expectantly. He did not know what it would do, or at least he was not going to tell her but it was not poison. She really needed that magic training, as much of a liar as he was; it was very plausible that he was right about reading not being enough.

Closing her eyes, she took a steadying breath and pushed the beaker to her lips downing the contents. Over fast, don't think about it, don't taste it and done. She coughed, patting her chest several times as a dull minty-copper taste flooded her throat and expanded her nasal passages like cough syrup. Was something supposed to happen? She felt oddly fine as she handed the now empty beaker back to the trickster still intently eyeing her.

"Nothing is happening." She shrugged, Loki placating her with a raised finger.

"Give your body a chance to absorb the formula."

"What is it supposed to do?" She asked again, idly scratching her arm from the scrutiny of his gaze. "You can tell me now that I've already drank it right?"

"That is indeterminable. It is supposed to react differently with each person that drinks it."

"Well… uh… what does it most commonly do then?" Kari tried again, hoping for a better answer now as she clawed at her arm worried by his scribbling of notes. "What are you writing?"

"You should stop scratching, you are making yourself bleed." He continued writing, not bothering to look up from his notes.

She looked down at her arm then gasped at the great lengths of marred flesh and bobbling of blood forming in pockets along the gashes. Halting her digging nails, Kari tugged her arm away and stared bewildered at the wounds she had caused herself. It was not that she felt itchy but tingly all over like the prickling of fear racing across her skin.

Loki grasped hold of her wrist, tugging the limb she was admiring upwards towards his eye line for further study before releasing it and scribbling down more notes. He paid no mind as she frowned at him, even when he grabbed her by the chin and looked directly in her irritated eyes.

"How disappointing." He said out loud to no one in particular. "I had hoped to see something more but…" He trailed off hopelessly and turned his back on her to resume his previous work. "You may leave."

"Seriously? That was it?" Kari scowled, disbelieving and somewhat disappointed at the same time. "A tingling arm? What was that?"

"A failure." He responded darkly. "Find me in the library tomorrow when you bring my lunch."

"Hmm…" She grumbled, staring at the back of his head and hoping it would catch fire. "For lessons right?"

"I gave my word."

Kari stared at his back a little longer, his words hardly ever meant much but once more she supposed she had to try and trust him.


	30. Chapter 30: Where are my boobs?

Arm stinging but now properly cleaned, Kari went to the kitchens to grab a late dinner. Only leftovers were now available, the dining hall having cleaned out an hour before hand but it did not really matter – she would have eaten anything with how ravenous she was feeling. Her body was still tingling slightly, fingers itching to have a scratch but she knew better than to give in to that craving at the moment. The place was pretty quiet, a handful of kitchen staff milling around prepping for tomorrow morning. Even Prue was away, off having some alone time with Egill somewhere and most likely gawking at one another in the moonlight.

It was a sickening thought that made her stomach spin as she pushed her empty plate away. People being happy having found someone to love and here she was like the loser she felt without prospects. Really, would anyone in Asgard even think twice about a serious relationship with a mostly human girl anyway? Kari groaned in utter misery prone annoyance at the thought and stood making her way back to her room. It was not worth thinking about.

As soon as she was under covers, however, that string of thought soon returned with a bothersome curiosity. At least if she could not have anyone, nobody could stop her from dreaming about it. She laughed out loud at her musing, rolling onto her side as Griffin joined her on the bed. Good dreams were soon to come though also confusing dreams. Various men appeared, some asgardian but mostly human men all with the same strange green eyes. She had obviously been thinking too much about Loki before falling asleep, or perhaps it was because he was always capturing her eyes like a predator. Creepy snake.

When her alarm finally went off she was already awake as she had been for most of the night. Her skin was clammy, covers thrown and twisted all over and off the bed. She had been restless, waking up every other hour with the burn of green flashing in front of her eyes. For once, actually having to wake up felt like a relief than continuing to try and sleep.

Kari yawned, stretching idly as she rolled her hips to alleviate the Griffin shaped burden from snoozing on her. He felt heavier; probably having eaten far too much from the treats his fan-girls fed him. If he was not such an active rat catcher, her feline friend would most likely of been incredibly obese by this point.

Stumbling out of bed, the drop to the ground having been further than she recalled, Kari pattered across the cold floor pulling her baggy nightshirt over her head. It had gotten stretched over night and slightly damp as she tossed it to the side and frowned at her chest of draws. They looked bigger for some reason, though that was probably the sleep deprivation talking.

Shrugging off the worry, she flicked through the draws looking for fresh clothing to wear for the day. Everything seemed a lot looser as she pulled on random pieces of clothing. It was not until she tried to put on a bra that she suddenly realized something was really wrong.

"Where are my boobs?" She asked her bra accusingly then squeaked as she heard her own voice. "Oh my god why do I sound like…"

Kari blinked several times, looking down at her body and clothing. She desperately reached forward, throwing on a green tunic that was now like a knee length baggy dress. Skittering over to the mirror, having to hold her leggings up, she stared at her reflection and instantly paled. This was not right. Who was this person? Wait, she kind of remembered those chubby cheeks from a distant memory.

"Holy fucking shit balls!" Kari squealed in a much younger voice.

She looked about ten maybe twelve at a push, or at least what she recalled her appearance to be at those ages. She was starting to panic, hyperventilating a little as she kept running her eyes up and down the length of her reflection. How had this happened? Oh god, Loki and his stupid blue stuff. Is this what it did? She had to find him and quickly before anybody else saw this – she would never be able to live down all the patronizing 'aren't you cute' statements.

Running down the corridor, having paused in her room briefly to adjust her leggings by tying a knot in the waist to hold them up and putting on a previously tight t-shirt, she careened towards the library looking for the god of mischief. He was not there however, nor was he in his rooms when she knocked very loudly on them. She could not go to the dining hall to check, it would be crowded with hungry breakfast eaters. Who else could she go to for help? Her grandfather maybe, if he was even back from his trip.

Making her way as rapidly and unseen as possible, Kari came to Fandral's rooms not even bothering to knock as she entered and ran barefoot into the bedroom. She could hardly believe her luck when she found him comatose and still clutching a bottle of wine in bed. So happy to see him, she hardly even paid any mind to the naked woman sprawled out over his equally bare chest and immediately began prodding him in the cheek.

"Granddad!" Kari poked him hard, making his head lull from one side to the other between snores. "Granddad, wake up!"

"Urgh…" Fandral groaned at all the noise and poking breaching his hangover like a fresh ragnorok.

"Granddad!" She tried again, this time holding his nose until he spluttered awake unable to breathe.

"What? Where is the trouble?" Fandral looked around wildly, the woman on his chest groaning unenthusiastically and rolling onto her side. "My sword?"

"Granddad!" Kari stamped her foot until he was staring at her if a little misty eyed.

"Who are you?" He was groggy, unable to focus fully on the little girl with curly brown hair just like Francesca's and blue eyes like his.

"Kari, it's Kari."

Fandral continued to stare for a moment longer until his gaze panned to the right and noted the empty bottle of wine in his hand. He snorted, amused for a moment before rolling over and snuggling up to his lady friend's warmth.

"Granddad! Don't go back to sleep!"

"Who is that?" A female voice, muffled by the pillow partially glued to her face, queried.

"Worry not, it is just a wine induced hallucination." Fandral replied moments before snoring again.

She could not believe this. Her grandfather thought she was a hallucination and just went right back to sleep when she really needed him. Blast it, what was the point? Someone else, who could she go to next? Frigga maybe, she would probably be in her garden.

Kari dashed out of her grandfathers rooms again, everything felt so much further away now she was small and her limbs too long not to trip up on occasionally. Tears would not quit bubbling up, dampening her eyes as she panted along the corridors and blurred her vision making it equally difficult to gage where exactly she was. Everything looked too big, too different and too confusing. Where did this corridor lead again?

Turning down another corridor, she wiped tears away on the back of her hand only to distract herself from the great hulking obstruction directly in her path. She collided with something hard, rebounding off its surface and landing awkwardly on the floor.

"Woah there little one! Where do you think you are going in such a hurry?" Thor chuckled down at the child before frowning and growing quiet.

Big blue eyes looked up at him through a sniffle of tears, awfully familiar brown curls messily distributed around a rounded face and that nose…

"Fandralkin?" The god of thunder raised an eyebrow at his own reasoning skills.

"Thor!" Kari squealed, delighted someone had not assumed she was a hallucination and holding her arms up for him to take.

He obliged her gesture, pulling the miniature version of his friend's granddaughter upwards until lifted against his chest. She squealed at first, not having expected to be picked up like a child and clung to his shoulders for balance. He was holding her as if she weighed half a loaf of bread, laughing all the while at the mystery of the situation.

"What has happened, Fandralkin?"

"I don't know!" Kari pouted, mulling it over in her head as best she could. "I think it's Loki's fault. He gave me this stuff to drink yesterday and it made my arm all itchy and then I went to bed but when I woke up I looked like this! So then I tried to find Loki but I couldn't see him anywhere and then I went to granddad but he called me a hawucination."

"Hawucination?" Thor chuckled at her obvious embarrassment.

"Hal-lu-ci-na-tion!" She overly pronounced back with a scowl. "This is sewious Thor! Stop laughing it's not funny!"

"I apologise, truly, but I had not pictured you thusly before." The god of thunder twirled her around suddenly making her squeal and cling for dear life. "I apologise again, I could not help myself." He tried desperately to swallow down his giddy amusement at her pouting. "Come, we shall find my brother, he is no doubt in the hall dining."

"No, I can't go there! People will see me!"

"I am with you, Fandralkin, be not afraid." He began continuing his walk towards the dining hall.

"But… But… at least put me down! I can walk you know!" Kari whined, struggling against his arms until finally put down.

Everything was much too big now, even Thor as she hardly came past his waist when standing to her full height. Kari chewed on her lip nervously, reaching out a hand and holding tight on his. He chuckled at her action, giving her a reassuring squeeze as they entered the hall. She was hiding as much of herself as she could behind his arm as heads turned to look up at them. They were probably wandering who she was and why was Thor with her but as long as they were only thinking and not knowing then she could at least maintain her dignity somewhat.

As they reached the higher-ups table, Kari stood on her tiptoes trying to see Loki over the mounds of food blocking half her view of the table. He was not here either but Frigga and Odin were.

"Mother, have you seen Loki?" Thor was frowning too, surveying the entire room as if the trickster might be hiding somewhere out of view.

"No, dear, why a-" Frigga paused, taking in the sight of the awkward child attached to her eldest son. "Kari?" She went wide-eyed at the realization, the girl in question squeaking and hiding behind Thor's leg much to his amusement. "Thor, what is this?"

"Loki's doing mother." Thor shrugged as if it were a common event as his mother peered between them with a huff of exasperation.

"Is that Fandral's kin?" Odin was now looming over at them, having put down his mug at hearing his youngest son's name being mentioned.

"Aye, father." Thor tried to coax his charge out from behind him but she was clinging steadfast so as not to see the increasingly petrifying king of Asgard – now bigger, uglier and scarier than ever. "She tells a tale of Loki giving her some strange concoction to drink and then waking as a child this day."

"Loki." Frigga sighed.

"Tell me child, did this concoction taste of apples and have a golden glow about it?" Odin was trying on his best calm fatherly voice, aware of how intimidated the smaller being was feeling.

"No." Kari sounded as small as she felt. "It was blue and kind of like cough syrup."

"I see." The king sounded thoughtful, yet perplexed in the same instance – perhaps sending the god of mischief to an alchemist was not the greatest of his plans. "I know of nothing with such a description that may change another so completely into a child."

"I will have to speak with my brother then." The god of thunder grinned at his sibling's latest trickery – things were never dull when Loki was around.

"You must find him first." Frigga stood, coming to the side of her eldest in order to reach the youngster hiding under his cloak. "Come my dear, we shall find you other clothes in the mean time." She offered her hand, Kari hesitating a moment before snatching at it and trailing after the queen.


	31. Chapter 31: Old clothes

As much as she tried, Frigga could not get the scowling, arms folded, pouting little girl to put on the dress she had found her. Kari had thrown somewhat of a tantrum when the queen suggested several new colours and went to sit under a table piled high with fabric. Despite being by age an adult, the change to child had also brought a decrease in emotional stability to the young woman turn young girl – it was frustrating for everyone but at least Frigga had extensive experience with sons.

"You can not keep walking around in those outsized garments presently worn, my dear." Frigga tried to coax Kari from out of her hiding place and squatted better to see the child giving her no eye contact. "They will descend and then you will find yourself very exposed in public. Is that what you wish?"

"No!" She grumbled back at the queen, still refusing to look at her.

"Then try this dress on. I am sure you will look every bit as-"

"No!" Kari wailed. "I hate dresses! I hate them! No! No! No!"

"Well I can not in all conscience dress you in boys clothing."

"Why not?"

"Because it would not be appropriate for a young lady."

"I'm twenty-eight!"

"You are not behaving it right now." Frigga suggested only to set the youngster off into a series of wailing sobs. "Oh dear me." The queen lowered herself further onto her knees and slid the child across the well-polished floor into her arms. "No tears now. Thor will uncover Loki and we will have this whole confusion sorted out very soon. In the mean time…"

Wiping her thumbs across Kari's cheeks she did her best to clear the tears before standing and heading for a very deep looking closet. Kari continued to sniffle on the floor, trying her best to clear the newer forming tears from her eyes, as she looked around at all the textiles. After a few minutes the queen called from the closet for a servant that diligently came forward and helped the queen bring in two worn looking trunks.

"Come, dear, we shall see what we can find for you in here." Frigga indicated for the girl to rise and look within the chest. "These are some of my sons old clothes from when they were young. Perhaps we shall find something that will fit." She began filtering through layers of what appeared to be Loki's old outfits. "Loki was always a slight child. How about this one?" She held a green and black shirt to Kari, checking the match of size as the girl made a 'blurgh' sound at the colour.

"I like these!" Kari grinned as she lifted a pair of blue trousers from what was obviously Thor's chest of mostly torn clothing.

"Those will not fit." Frigga declared then rolled her eyes at the pouting. "I suppose they can be taken in."

She closed the lids to the chests, having picked up several items and took Thor's too big trousers from the girl's hands as well. It would be enough for a few days and by that time they would hopefully have fixed this latest intrigue and be back to normal.

Half an hour, new fittings and finally they were ready to head off again to join the search for Loki. Kari was giggling excitably at her new attire, Frigga joining in with an amused chuckle at the scampering nature of a previously melancholy woman. Even if she did not make an elegant little girl, she still made an adorable looking little boy with much too much hair. They were heading towards the library, that being the best place to discover Loki at random points in the day but upon reaching the doors instead found Thor exiting. He froze in the doorway, obviously not having expected to find them there until a gigantic grin washed over his face muddled with relief.

"Mother, he is within. I was just on my way to find you." The god of thunder moved to allow the queen entrance but found further humour upon looking down. "Is that Loki's old tunic?"

"And your trousers." Kari added, giving him a twirl to show off her outfit.

"I had not known you kept such keepsakes, mother." Thor laughed, placing a hand behind the girl's shoulder blades to coax her ahead of him into the library.

"For when the memories fade, my son." Frigga smiled as she led the way across the library at a brisk walk towards her youngest lounging in his chair curiously. "Loki, dear, you must explain this."

"Explain this?" Loki sat up straight, confusion forming across his features.

"You know very well, brother!" Thor raised an accusing finger whilst simultaneously pushing Kari closer for inspection. "It is as I told, Fandralkin is but a child."

"And you believe I had something to do with his?" The trickster was shocked, appalled even as he leaned in closer to examine his so called prank.

"You made me drink that blue stuff!" Kari scowled at his make-belief bafflement.

"I forced upon you nothing." He corrected her accusation. "I merely asked."

"So you admit it, brother!" Thor was quick to jump in, though Frigga held him back from physically leaping.

"Loki, an explanation of the previous nights occurrence is required."

"Yes, mother." Loki sighed back into his chair and pondered for a moment. "The tonic I gave was nothing more than a trait amplifier configured to increase its potency. I had expected physical and psyche elements to increase: Intelligence, attractive qualities, speed, strength, courage and so forth."

"Loki, you know your father has banned the use of such magic in this realm." Frigga was not impressed. "They are undeterminable, at the will of the consumers personal opinions and self-identity. What did you think to accomplish by altering such a dangerous creation?"

"I was striving to perfect it for the good of the realm."

"And for selfish reasons of your own, brother." Thor interjected the charitable nature of his brother's tone with an add-on pat atop Kari's head. "But how has this, trait amplifier, created a child of Fandralkin?"

"That is quite obvious to see." Loki shrugged then snorted at the bewildered look of all around him. "The self-identity of this mortal is that of a child."

"What?" Kari looked up at Thor and Frigga in turn for further divulgence.

"It could very well be so and with the amplification of the effect would be enough for such a physical change." Frigga was puzzling out, a reassuring smile spared for the head-tilting bundle of confusion looking up at her.

"Do you mean to say, Fandralkin see's herself as a child?" Thor finally delivered a simplified answer to the room in general.

"No I don't!" Kari screeched, giving a stomp of her foot for emphasis.

"It would appear so, brother." Loki smiled, his expectation having not been met but certainly made up for by the genuine answer of Kari's internal workings.

"How best do we resolve this, Loki?" Frigga moved closer to her youngest, a delicate hand rested upon his shoulder as she sought out a way to conclude the mess he had created.

"I know not, mother." He shrugged in turn and sighed at her continued concerned gaze to think deeper on the subject. "The original formula would naturally ware off in most cases. I suggest waiting to see if the configured version will do the same or…"

"Or?" Thor repeated his last word.

"Or… Kari Motter will simply have to grow up once again." Loki spread his arms wide as if to say 'taa daa' at a magnificent display of magician trickery.

"The allfather will not be pleased."

"Mother, father will understand." The god of mischief was self-assured, unthreatened in the least by the prospect of the kings wrath – worse come to worse, he would probably be sent to pick up litter for a few weeks.


	32. Chapter 32: Warriors against Jotuns

Kari was miserable, clinging to Thor's cape as he half dragged her through the palace. The adults had been discussing her for a while longer in the library, the general consensus not being anything she liked the sound of. Wait for this childhood to wear off or grow up. Neither was appealing by their indeterminable length. Thor had briefly discussed aging her forcibly at one point, an idea that made her heart leap in hope, but was turned down swiftly by Frigga and Loki jointly. There was a lack of guarantee with where she would end up age wise – possibly even an elderly woman or dust.

Right now, however, the god of thunder was taking her to see her grandfather. It was decided, by yet another conversation she was unwelcome to participate in, that for the time being at least she would have to be under the supervision of a parental figure until she stopped acting like a child as well as looking like one. Fandral had been the obvious answer but it would also not be an easy topic to get into and so Thor had declared he would take charge of the task being the other man's closest friend.

"I'm tired." Kari whined, tripping over her feet a couple of times before slipping onto her rear still clutching hold of the blondes cloak - which only meant he was now dragging her across the heavily polished floor giggling all the way.

"What mischief has you now, Fandralkin?" Thor paused, the tugging on his cloak getting too much for him to ignore and lifted her back onto her feet by the collar of her tunic. "You should say if you have fallen."

"I said I was tired but you ignored me!"

"It is difficult to hear someone so far away." He feigned ignorance based on their difference in height.

"I'll start calling you uncle Thor." She threatened.

"I am not your uncle." He laughed at the suggestion.

"You and granddad are shield brothers." She shrugged. "So that makes you great-uncle Thor."

"This does not sound well reasoned." He frowned in thought. "A midgardian concept?"

"Yea- GRANDDAD!" Kari went wide-eyed in giddy wonder as she caught a glimpse of her Robin Hood-esk kin walking at the opposite end of the corridor. "GRANDDAD!"

Fandral paused, hearing the term he was now rather accustomed too and gave a confused stare towards the child bobbing up and down waving her arms. He looked from left to right, then behind him to check if someone else was being indicated but he was alone spare a couple of guards standing stoically at their posts. Looking for a second time, as the girl called to him yet again and scampered towards him, Fandral froze realizing with dread his hallucination had been quite real. Astonished and agitated, he threw himself backwards until colliding with an expensive looking vase to make contact with the wall and stared on as his granddaughter finally reached him throwing her arms around him.

"Granddad!" Kari squeezed the swordsman as tight as she could as he continued to gape down at her utterly befuddled. "I told you I'm not a hawucination!"

"A Hawuci-what?" Fandral looked up at Thor as he came to stand with them chuckling all the while at his friends helpless expression. "What is this madness, friend?"

"The madness is of Loki." The other blonde indicated the short nature of the once taller woman.

"This is Loki?"

"I am not Loki!" Kari jumped back pouting up at her grandfather and rather offended by his accusation. "I look nothing like that rat!"

"Kari? My dear?" Fandral leaned over, all the better to see her and began tugging on her chubby cheeks. "Is that truly you?"

"Granddad!" She pulled out of his reach, rubbing her cheeks with both hands to limit the pinching pain. "Of course it's me! I tried to tell you before but you just rolled over and started canoodling with that naked woman."

"Naked woman?" Thor was intrigued.

"I never kiss and tell my friend." Fandral chuckled until kicked in the shin. "Ow! What was that for, my dear?"

"This is sewious!"

"Weally?" He replied mockingly.

"Don't make fun of me!" Kari sniffled, ducking her head under Thor's arm. "Uncle Thor, granddad is being mean!"

"Uncle Thor?"

"A midgardian concept." Thor waved off the explanation as unneeded with how bizarre the humans could be. "Come, we should withdraw to your rooms and discuss this matter further."

Both adults nodded somewhat solemnly to one another; a difficult discussion to be sure awaited them. Upon returning to his rooms, Fandral went about readying something strong and alcoholic for the men to drink whilst a cup of water was handed to a scowling little girl sitting on a chair much too big for her. She could not believe this; just because she was short they were treating her like a child. It was discrimination and prejudice and all that other politically correct stuff that would not go by unchallenged if she were back in London.

Kari groaned as she sipped her water and slid lazily into the back of her chair as the adults talked. Fandral had laughed at first about her predicament, finding the ridiculous nature of its occurrence humorous but as soon as Thor had reached the part where he was to be responsible for a child that quickly switched. He had paled, pouring himself another cup of wine and downing it before he felt comfortable to continue the conversation. It was simply not doable, he was no mother nor did he have a wife to look after a young girl and what about his adventuring? She could not stay with him. It was not possible.

Neither man had been aware as the smaller creature slipped from her chair and crawled silently across the floor past them out the door. Tears were falling but she made no sound to signal their pass as she hurried through the palace on her way outside. It had not occurred to her that her grandfather would say such things. She had heard it from strangers during her childhood sure, but always assumed if only they were family nobody would be so rejecting. How had she been so wrong?

Tripping on the steps, Kari paused to wipe the tears from her eyes and yowl a hissing annoyance at a bump on her knee. Her legs were constantly tangling up underneath her, how had she ever survived being a child the first time around? She sniffled once, wiping her runny nose on a sleeve and got back onto her feet before skipping down the rest of the steps with a melancholic purpose. Who knew where she was going, even she did not know but ignorance was not going to prevent her from going there.

She ran through the streets of the city, twisting in and out of scary adults ways as many a goliath almost stepped on her. Being a child was really hard; again she wondered how she had survived the first time round. Would she really have to grow up again? All that awkward, pimple wielding, angry, confused, melodrama and school coming back to tease and torment her all over again – just after she had escaped it too. This could not be happening. Maybe it was all just a cheese-induced dream? Yeah, with her luck, no way.

Bumping, tumbling and finally finding herself outside the city, Kari ran full pelt once more into an open field lush with green grass and flowers. The perfect place to escape to and not be found by prying adults. She spun in circles, fell to the ground getting covered in grass stains and rolled down a hill until exhausted and left staring up at clouds. Ok, being a child again was not too bad when you could do stuff like that and not get funny looks. Kari chuckled at her own musing, tracing the shape of a cloud above with her forefinger and determining it to be a fluffy chicken.

Sitting up, the sounds of running water reached her ears and she looked around wildly for the source. Lifting herself, Kari began to follow the scent and ran further across the open space until what appeared to be a very deep looking river came into view. She 'oohed' at the dangerous quality of the racing wetness, clambering down onto the bank to get a closer inspection and finding herself on a short strip of stone and driftwood covered ground. Picking up a stone, she flung it into the water with a satisfying 'plunk' and giggled at the ridiculousness of what she was doing. Further along the bank she could see a group of other children playing some sort of game involving sticks and fighting. She turned back to her game of throwing stones only to find herself shouted at by a very boisterous sounding boy.

"Hey! Want to come play?"

"I dunno!" She shouted back, the group finding interest enough to start strolling over to her now.

"Why not?" The boy, a copper haired, smudge covered rascal looking type frowned at her balancing a stick on his shoulder one-handed.

"I dunno what you're playing."

"Just warriors and Jotun."

"Jotun?"

"Is she stupid?" Another boy asked aloud as the rest of the group sniggered at her question.

"Shush you lot." Smudge-covered-rascal, scolded as he stepped closer still unafraid of the strange looking girl wearing boys clothing. "Frost giants, you know, big scary blue monsters with red eyes that live in the snow."

"Oh." Kari feigned knowledge she did not have.

"I am Garthar Engarson." Garther introduced himself as several others started shouting out their names as well in a jumble of syllables wishing to be known.

"Uh… I'm Kari… Fandralkin…" She inwardly cursed herself for using his name as her own but then again this was asgard and a bunch of asgardian children probably would not understand why her real last name was Motter.

"Like Fandral the dashing?" A mousy-faced fat boy, she thought might have been called Dagur or something, suddenly got very excited.

"Yeah, he's my uh… grandfather." She shrugged as if it were nothing to be proud of but by the loud wowed sounds coming from the group of boys it was apparently a very big deal.

"Really? Is that why you are wearing boys' clothes? Are you training to be a swordsman like Fandral the dashing too?"

"My grandfather is a horrible, alcoholic, philanderer with no morals and even less scruples about dumping his children to continue his nihilistic ways." Kari ground out, arms folded as the group of children cocked their heads at her little rant.

"What is a philanderer?" Dagur looked to the others for answers.

"I think it is a type of lizard." Another boy answered followed by several 'oh's' from the crowd.

"So you want to play or not?" Garthar tried to get them all back to their very important task for the day.

"Uh… sure ok." She shrugged as several of the boys grinned and cheered holding their sticks aloft.

"You can be the captured maiden that we have to rescues from the evil Jotun!"

"What? Why do I have to be the hapless woman?"

"Because," Garthar shrugged his shoulders feebly, "you are a girl and only boys are warriors."

"Sif is a warrior and she's not a boy."

"True that." Garthar chuckled. "Fine you can be my second and help us rescue the maiden Dagur."

"Ow, I hate being the girl!" Dagur complained.

The children split up into Jotuns and asgardian warriors, Dagur at the back of the Jotun group's camp sitting arms folded and pouting on a rock pretending to be a prisoner of war. Just his luck, when they finally get a girl to play with them he still has to be the damsel in distress. Garthar disappeared for a moment, returning with a second stick for his new friend and then things had started to get very noisy as each side began wailing battle cries and childish threats at one another. Apparently even asgardians had 'yo mama' insults which greatly amused Kari; her ribs began hurting from laughing so hard.

When the battle finally started, it was mostly a lot of wailing, vocal sound effects of explosions and hitting each other's sticks clumsily. The mess of the scenario did not take away from the lunacy of fun. It raged on for a few hours, Garthar managing to lift Dagur onto his back and run him back to the asgardian camp twice only to have the hapless would-be-woman get stolen by a Jotun each time. It was glorious mayhem and Kari even found herself having a lot more fun than she remembered occurring when she was really ten.

All good things come too an end, however, as several parents appeared above the riverbank calling to their wayward sons to follow them home for dinner. They soon lacked the manpower to effectively continue their game, Garthar and Dagur being the last two not to leave her alone. They were throwing stones into the river now, Garthar trying to skim flatter rocks across the surface of the water in several jumps as Dagur pestered her for stories about her grandfather. She had very little to say on the subject, which he found aggravating thinking she was hiding juicy knowledge from his ears. As a consolation, Kari tried to teach them some of the sword stances Fandral had been teaching her; both boys copying her movements with an extreme level of concentration. It was serious business to learn skills in weaponry for future warriors.

Finally, parents appeared for the last two boys as they scampered away waving farewell from the top of the bank before disappearing from view. Kari sighed, dropping down onto a half buried boulder and groaned at the river in front of her. This was an all too familiar scene, a lone child waiting to be found and yet nobody had ever come to collect her except maybe a social worker to take her to the next foster home or boarding house. Even with a second chance, things never changed, not really.

She wept, streams of tears cascading down her cheeks and soaking her sleeves as she tried desperately to control the flood with closed fists. Shaking, pained noises and internal muscle strain overwhelmed her enough to make her deaf and blind to the world. She did not care anymore, only felt a deep-rooted sadness she was no longer able to reasonably manage with the lesser emotional control of a child's mind.

There was a thud somewhere behind her that neither distracted her from her task nor seemed important. She covered her ears when she thought she heard her name, hallucinations did not have names. Head shaking from side to side over and over again only stopped when she felt the need to gasp at the pressure of a hand gripping her shoulder. She hiccoughed, sniffled and wiped further snot onto her sleeve before turning and looking up with too big eyes.

"Kari, my dear." Fandral sighed in a mixture of relief, worry and exacerbation; children were tiring and elusive beasts.

"Granddad." She hiccoughed again, leaping up to standing and flinging herself against him in one solid bound.

He was startled at first, unsure hands wrapping themselves around the smaller figure with several pats on the head. She could not believe he had come for her. Someone had finally come for her.


	33. Chapter 33: Locket

It was early, far too early for anyone to disturb him as he headed for the library. The palace was quiet, except for the kitchens that were in a noisy state of bustle and preparation. Loki was in a plotting mood, something to amuse him now that his father had gotten the disappointed speech about messing with alchemy he had no business altering over with. That had been rather tedious but at least Odin had understood where his heart had been and not sent him to complete some menial punishment.

He paused at the library door, finding it slightly ajar and groaned outwardly at the boorish nature of most asgardians that held no respect for a place of wisdom. With a further headshake, Loki braced himself for a number of horrors that may appear within – torn pages, books on the floor, a fire surrounded by book burning drunken warriors. However, the bookshelves seemed intact and neat, the floor clean and polished as he strolled the length of the entrance walkway. He sighed, relieved at the silence that awaited him within and began thumbing through a line of books on the subject of elements and weather. Yes, something like this might make an interesting time of the upcoming harvest festivals.

A creak reverberated off the high walls of the library, increasing its audible magnitude and startled the trickster upon hearing it. He almost dropped the book in his hands, peering from left to right in confused concern. The library was empty, who else would enter his space and remain so quiet? Definitely not Thor.

Loki inhaled, calming his momentarily scattered nerves and walked along the line of bookshelves until set upon the main walkway. Someone was sitting in his chair, towards the centre of the room, leaning a book against the side of his desk to keep it balanced on their lap. He scoffed at the waif, kicking her feet back and forth between the chair legs as neither could reach the floor by several inches. It was pitiful how small she was now and somewhat disturbing how she somehow managed to make his childhood clothing look girlish on her spindly frame.

Strolling towards her she failed to pay him any mind, casually flipping the pages of her book and biting her lip in concentration. He turned his head to the side, reading the title and raised an eyebrow at what he found.

"The barbarian and his dog?" He read the title aloud, expecting a response from the munchkin in his chair but she only continued to ignore him. "This is a book for asgardian children, far above your menial intellect but I suppose you may enjoy the illustrations." He scowled as she continued to ignore him. "Karian Motter?" Nothing. "Petulant child."

Loki crossed his arms, glowering down at the book-reading imp now humming a tune under her breath. How dare she ignore him, in his library whilst sitting in his chair and reading his books. He snapped his fingers, willing a suspended flame to appear within his palm with the intention of burning her painstakingly braided hair as recompense but was halted as he noticed the buds protruding from her ears. Waving the fire out, he leaned in closer, tugging the wire attached to her right earpiece until the bud popped loose before issuing a rather deep and loud 'boo' sound.

Kari screamed, having not noticed him and now terrified by the loud noise in her ear. She flung herself to the left, chair toppling with her for an equally frightening moment before the god of mischief pushed the armrest back towards him to steady it from falling. Probably not his best move, as with the counter sway the girl was able to smack him over the head with her hardback book. Loki grunted, stumbling backwards at the strike and holding his nose out of book swinging distance.

"YOU!" She screeched at him, now standing on the chair so they were roughly the same height. "What do you think you are doing? I could of died!"

"You exaggerate." He glared, petting his nose with two fingers to check for bleeding. "And you have stricken a prince of asgard."

"You scared me!"

"As is within my right. Do you fail to recollect the conventions of the palace once more? The library is off limits to riff-raff and subordinates such as your stumpy manifestation."

"Frigga said I could and said I had to read this book and to tell you to be nice and behave or she will be cross with you." Kari giggled at his obvious annoyance.

"I am sure my mother said no such words to the likes of you."

"Did too." She leaned forward sticking her tongue out at him. "And she did my hair too. Doesn't it look nice? I like the butterfly clips best."

"How very undersized and juvenile." He came forward, snatching the book out of her hand to stop her from hitting him again before lifting her squirming and thrashing off his chair to deposit on the ground below. "Bad child. No standing on the furniture."

"I am not a dog!" She moved to kick him in the shin but only met air as he reflectively dodged the blow. "Stupid Locket!"

"Locket?"

"I don't like your stupid name. It sounds like locate key or something and keys are for locks and locket sounds prettier."

"I had not believed you might become any further maddening until this moment but you defy even the realms of possibility, Karian Motter."

"You're just mad because you're old and nobody likes you."

"That may very well be so," he glowered, "but at least, unlike yourself, I am disliked because of my actions and not hated and despised because of who I am. Strange creature that you are, unable to even love yourself well enough and instead internally mock and berate flaws until outwardly presented by alchemy meant for enhancement. When magic cannot even find worthy traits within, how pitiful must you truly be, child."

Blue on green, a child's haunted eyes captured by a smug predator and held unblinking. She wanted to cry but knew she could not in front of him; the war would be lost if she gave in now. Willing the last of her reserves into play, she forced a frown which only made him chuckle at her defiance until caught unaware with wide-eyed disbelief. Little girls, the perfect height to punch asgardian princes right in the crotch.

Loki exhaled a whining, pained groan at the not so powerful strike directly into his softest and least guarded place. His knees were bending under the strain of agony as his foe giggled aggravatingly happy at his discomfort. Noticing the look of murderous intent in his eyes, Kari gave a worried gasp and hopped past the distracted god of mischief only to make it two steps towards freedom before dragged back by her collar. Oh this was not good.

She screamed, finding herself airborne and hurtling backwards until pinned into the chair she had previously occupied. Whimpering at the discomfort of force pushing her against the elaborate carvings within the wood, she squirmed uselessly as Loki hissed through clenched teeth until his pain subsided.

"Let me go." She pleaded, tears beginning to pool to the surface of her under lashes. "Please."

"Oh, I imagine we are far beyond the realms of clemency now, mortal." He lifted her up once more, letting her dangle and cling to his arm as she tried to stop him choking her from the awkward grip on her collar. "Cry if it gives you comfort." Toneless and neutral in his objectification of her squalling façade, Loki continued towards the centre of the room and waved his free hand in looping motions to create an oddly glowing intricate pattern on the floor. "It seems the only way I will be rid of your nuisance is by sending you somewhere no one will think to look. Tell me, do you like the cold?" He smiled as she shook her head to the best of her ability, spraying welling tears in the wake of the motion and trying desperately to kick at him again. "Good, I am pleased with this answer. Try not to come back."

He dropped her, she had expected to hit the ground and inhaled accordingly to prepare but instead found herself enveloped by light and screaming. There was a stomach-churning jerk that rocked her left, then right until a loud 'pop' made her ears ring. Then things got very cold and airy, Kari managing to flip herself in the air just in time to see she was now hurtling downwards towards an awful lot of snow.


	34. Chapter 34: Snow leopards and fishing

Steam rising with every breath, damp on cooling cheeks as snow melted around a bodies heat only to reform as solid ice from continued cold. Gasping at the frozen nature of air within her lungs, Kari pushed herself upwards only to discover the wind bitter and striking her bare skin with tiny ice knives. She shivered, her clothing not suitable for such a frozen wasteland and equally unprepared her reddening skin.

Sliding onto unsteady feet, the little girl looked around at the scenery with a hand shielding her eyes the best she could. Quite desolate in appearance, rocky outcrops moving down the hill top she stood upon until in the distance a thick density of trees protruded from the grey and white like a welcome haven. She sighed with some relief at the forest, lifting the collar of her shirt over her nose to keep what little heat she still had circulating around her body rather than lost to the atmosphere. It was a start, a shelter to focus on until she could figure out what next to do.

Trekking downwards, slipping several times and dropping unsuspecting into a snow covered dip, Kari made her way towards the outline of trees. The wind was relentless, without mercy and her braided hair frozen solid before she came anywhere near her target; at least the burning pain within her fingers had finally dulled into a numbness, though on second thought that probably was not a good sign.

Teeth chattering but relieved, she limped in amongst the trees and settled into a nook of rocks out of the cold wind. She had to keep rubbing her limbs, hands, breathing into her shirt to fight the painful cold and proceeding stages of frostbite. Where was she? Why had he sent her here? Would her grandfather come to get her soon or was this a mess she would have to find a way out of? Her mind was a buzz with questions without answer; distracted completely until the soft mewing sounds besides her caught her attention.

She looked to her right, further inside the rocks nook was dark but filled with gentle movement and the song of infancy. Blinking in shocked surprise, Kari crawled in closer and reached out to touch a soft fluffy bundle of mewling wonder. There were three of them in total, white and grey with black splodges and barely opened eyes confused and hissing as she picked up the closest kitten – roughly the size of Griffin in all honesty.

"Aren't you cute." Kari cooed at the hissing, wailing, unable to manage his own thrashing feet cub. "Where's your mummy?"

The answer came far more swiftly than she had ever anticipated, though in truth she had not expected an intelligible response in the first place. There was a deep guttural growling above, Kari pulling the kitten closer to her chest as a protective response and peered up at large grey eyes furious and indignant at the trespass and kidnap. It was a snow leopard, though many times larger than one uncommonly found on earth and issuing extreme levels of warning to the small human shaking now from fear rather than cold she could no longer feel.

"Please…" Kari breathed, wide-eyes fixed on the grey orbs above her and warm mewing bundle held tight to chest. "Don't hurt me…"

The mother continued to glare, though softness penetrated that burning gaze at the girl's persuasive words and dampened the warning growl to that of a wet sounding chuff. Kari remained transfixed; blue caught in grey but for the first time in a long while she was unsure which was the capturing predator. This beast was no green-eyed monster like someone she knew; how did he have so much power over her anyway? Was he able to use some sort of mind control like her too? There would be time to think about those kinds of questions later, if she survived, but for now things were in a dire seesaw.

She offered up the squirming kitten in her arms to the snow leopard, their eyes never breaking as the cat obliged the gesture and took her mewling infant by the neck scruff. She hopped down from her rocky perch, cub held comfortably between her jaw and skulked into the den full of hungry kittens. The mother coiled her body protectively around her children, gaze focused on the small intruder but no longer threatening as the cubs settled in to feed.

Kari sighed her relief, heart rhythm returning to normal as she curled her legs up against her chest and felt somewhat safer under a mother's watchful eye. No wonder it had been so much warmer here, the ground covered in a thick layer of shed white and black-grey fur creating a soft carpet. It was a perfect spot for both their needs, sheltered and out of the watchful eye of predators, but where were they? By the sheer size of the leopard, Kari was sure they were not on earth; could this be another part of asgard? Or was she in a completely different realm? If only cats could talk, she would ask the diligently cub licking mother to her right.

Days went by, or so she thought not entirely competent with the telling of time wherever she was. Her new friends had grown accustomed to her presence, even allowing her to cuddle amongst them at night to enjoy joint body heat. As dawn and dusk came, the snow leopard left her lair of cubs to hunt and partake in big cat rituals. It was hunger on the third day that finally stirred Kari from the den to follow the big cats elegant stocky build into the forest. Such a long beautiful tail, she wished she had her sketchpad and pencils with her to capture the creature's majesty but more important was finding something to eat before she passed out from hunger.

The leopard paused her patrol, pawing at the ground to release a feathery leafed plant from the snow before consuming parts of it in an amusing fashion. Kari stared at the display, coming closer to the plant when the leopard was finished and gave it an incredulous sniff. It did not look edible for humans but at least the mother cat seemed to enjoy the taste.

She skipped off after the big cat once more; following her to a stream where she paused to drink. Water; possibly better than food if her cracked lips and dehydrated eyeballs had anything to say on the matter. Kari kneeled beside the cat, dipping her hands into the stream and drinking in huge cold gulps of the fresh mountain water. It was not until she finally quenched her thirst that the presence of fish caught her eyes. She stared at them longingly, huge, silver racers swimming past at increasing speeds. One would be enough for a few days but how to catch one? Fishing had never been a skill she was taught by anyone though the basic principle seemed easy enough. A net of some kind? Perhaps a cage?

She sat there, knees cooling in the snow beneath her, thinking harder than she thought possible on the subject of catching fish. Twigs, that strange plant she saw before as makeshift string and some patience was what she needed. Collecting the items, she sat once more beside the stream and began constructing a crude cage as her snow leopard friend carried on her patrol catching several hares further on. The first cage had scattered apart the moment a fish had confusedly swam inside, the second lasted a little longer but too snapped open as soon as she tried to lift it with the added weight. In the end, Kari had to remove the threads braided into her hair so lovingly, though it pained her to do so, to reinforce the third structure but the sacrifice had paid off when she finally caught a fish only to scream terrified at the huge slimy creature now flopping on the bank desperately trying to get back to water.

It slipped passed her cowering form, back into the stream much to her dismay and mutual relief before swimming away happily. How was she supposed to eat a fish that was still alive? Could she actually kill it? It was a horrid thought, murdering some poor innocent creature just so she could eat it. Now was not a good time to become a vegetarian however, her stomach was growling impatient for feeding and fish was all she had.

"Ok… I can do this." Kari straightened her back, enthusing some confidence into her posture and mind alike.

She tried again, fish out of water, flopping, diving to catch it on the ground only to miss and hear the 'plop' of failure as it rejoined its fellows in the stream. Again, she tried her luck; fish out of water, flopping, throw a rock at it and miss to hear the 'plop' of failure. Three times, four times, five times growing increasingly frustrated and growling with annoyance at every 'plop' of escaping fish. She tried sitting on the sixth one but then squealed at the wet, wriggling nature of the creature below her and rolled out of its freedom seeking way.

As she pulled the twelfth fish from the water, she was reasonably furious enough to grab it by the tail and hit it as hard as she could against a tree trunk. It stopped moving; she dropped it and stared at the death caused by her hands. Tears were welling up, hands covering her mouth from the shock of seeing the large lifeless eyes staring up at her but she was hungry, starving even. It was all right to kill if it was for survival, right? You could kill someone who was attacking you to survive but that thought brought her little comfort as the roles in her current scenario were very much reversed.

A noise broke her from her reverie, a booming applause of huge hands clapping behind her followed by laughing cheers. Her spine grew suddenly icy, hairs rising on the back of her neck as she pivoted on the spot to stare at the gigantic blue figures sitting across the other side of the stream. So caught up in fishing mischief, Kari had not noticed the pair of Jotun's sat on a fallen tree trunk and enjoying the show she entertained them with. She paled under their gazes, stood still as a statue as if this might make her invisible but it did not.


	35. Chapter 35: A wolf called Tom

The Jotun's were not so bad, friendly and nice even – certainly not the monsters she had been told they were. After an awkward and terrifying meeting at the fishing spot, the pair had introduced themselves as elderly sisters living on the outskirts of civilization and offered a roof with fire to cook the girl's catch. Wary but controlled by the roaring nature of her stomach, Kari had followed the siblings back home dragging her large fish by its tail and currently sat within a high ceilinged hut covered in a blanket of furs.

Kari stared longingly at the fish roasting above the fire, toasty warm and drooling with desperation to eat. Never in all her life had she been so hungry, the smell was intoxicating and her eyes only continued to grow impossibly bigger as the eldest of the sisters pulled the cooked meal from the fire and served it on a too big plate for the youngster. Kari dived upon it, hissing as her fingers burned peeling the skin away but shoveled a tender handful of flesh into her mouth despite the danger. Steam huffed past her lips as she desperately tried to blow the heat from the meat already in her mouth and swallowed the contents with several thumps on her chest to help it pass.

"You will choke, little one." The elder Jotun chuckled at the small creatures shenanigans.

"It's hot." Kari winced as the burn in her esophagus continued.

"Let it cool."

"But I'm hungry." She pouted, holding back from piling more into her gob long enough to blow several times on the steaming fish. "And it's really good."

The sisters shared a look of continued amusement, long had it been since a child was among them and as strange and small as this one was the sense of familiarity by behavior was reassuring. Even in other species, children were in many ways the same kind of mischievous folly makers with hardly any logic about them. However, the larger questions began to raise their great awkward heads and so began a series of unintelligible scowls and eyebrow raisings between the two women as they silently discussed the child messily eating on their floor. Should they keep it? Where had it come from? Why was it here?

"Little one, how come you here?"

"Huh?" Kari peered up, cheeks puffed out to accommodate what was being forced between her lips. "I dunno…" She paused to swallow before she spewed any more of her meal out with her words. "I was in asgard, in the palace library and then Loki was being mean to me so I punched him in the dick and he got really mad and threw me at the ground but it was glowing and I fell through the sky for a bit before waking up in the snow." Licking the fingers of one hand she looked around the hut as if only noticing it for the first time. "Is this Jotunheim?"

"Yes."

"Oh." Kari frowned, lost in thought for a second or two. "Garthar and Dagur said Jotunheim is full of scary monsters that want to eat children. Are you going to eat me?"

"Children are skin and bone." The younger sister laughed from across the room where she worked on darning old clothing. "Hardly worth the trouble."

"Do not tease." The older Jotun shook her head, though still smiling. "We have no need to eat you, little one, but the men would gladly squish you beneath their feet."

"Ewwww." Kari shuddered at the thought of her head making a 'pop' noise if stood upon by a frost giant.

"You mentioned a palace and Loki?" The giantess continued her line of questioning. "Prince Loki of asgard?"

"Yeah that's him. He's a dick."

"You live within the palace of asgard?"

"Yeah." She shrugged. "I was sort of kidnapped and forced to stay by Odin because my grandfather is Fandral the dashing and I accidentally opened a portal inside a museum on earth and Odin was kind of mad about it at first but then he sort of calmed down because Heimdall was all like, "…further back…" and then it turned out that Fandral fucked my grandmother so I had to become a asgardian waitress, which is really hard! Asgardian men are creepers, always groping and stuff but then Loki was being mean to me, yet again, and made me drink this blue stuff and I turned into a child again which was really annoying at first but then I started playing with Garthar and Dagur out in the fields and granddad let me come live with him and Frigga is really nice and… what was I talking about again?"

The two women started laughing again, exchanging a look of amused disbelief at the girl's story; obviously the child was a little storyteller as were most youngsters. Kari pouted at the level of mirth in the air, somewhat aware she was being laughed at but too hungry to care as she went back to eating.

As life continued its passage in Jotunheim, Kari began to slowly find she did not truly mind the cold or the snow. She built snowmen, increasingly well-defined ones that grew to look like people she once knew. The Jotun sisters found space for her within their home, a warm bed often enough shared with a great hulking old wolf with a name she had trouble pronouncing and so shortened to 'Tom'. He rarely left the hut, long since seen days of adventure but would at times pad after the small girl as if she were a wayward pup escaping the nest. It amused the older women to watch the trailing affection and equally so assured the new mischief maker of their household would keep from too much trouble with the old wolf at her back.

She became helpful at fishing, the youngest sister trading her several of what the giantess would perceive as small fish for a little fur coat to keep the human warm. Was she a pet or perhaps this was like living with great aunts, Kari often mused but whatever this life was it certainly felt nicer still than any foster home she had lived in. Perhaps this was even a blessing in disguise despite the angry way it had come about through green-eyed vengeance. Punching Loki had been a good call.

The snow leopard's cubs were much bigger now, playful with her as if one of the litter as they made to pounce one another. Soon they would be taller than her slight ten-year-old frame, however, and by then her play friends would be too dangerous to allow to tackle her. Before that day came, the mother leopard left without indication and took her young further into the mountains. She had cried, a comforting embrace from the sisters in turn coaxing her to sleep that night. The loss was personal, a deeply troubling gap in a child's soul that left her heart broken as if losing a best friend because their family was moving far away. She had never had to deal with that kind of pain before, never staying put long enough as a child to bother making friends and equally always being the one that moved away.

In order to distract her melancholy ways, the elder Jotun had decided it would be best to start a little schooling. If a human child were to remain in a land of frost giants and magnificent beasts then she would need to learn its ways. There was also the added worry of other Jotun coming across her and wishing to cause harm. To counter this possible predicament, the girl's schooling had begun with the learning of a simple transformation spell, though the perfection had not been anywhere close to easy.

With enough concentration, Kari could now alter her appearance to something closer related to a frost giants – blue skinned, a reddish tint to her eyes but still the same curly brown hair and short stature. It was the best she could master as her first lesson in magic and the sisters having decided it best to give her a story that she were the offspring of a frost giantess and asgardian coupling; apparently not an unheard of occurrence. The lie worked however, the sisters taking her along with them into a larger encampment for supplies one month. It had been a fascinating experience for the girl as well as the other inhabitants that eyed her curiously. There had been other children too, though much larger in size for the same age but she found she liked them little as one of the bigger girl's had immediately attempted to bully her about the curliness of her hair.

Jotunheim was a strange, harsh and freezing world so very different from earth or asgard but after a year under the care of cheerful old giantesses and the warm embrace of an old wolf called Tom, the strangest thing yet happened. Kari thought of herself at home.


	36. Chapter 36: Snow globe

Picking up firewood, a great awkward stack of sticks held tight against her chest as Tom panted ahead of her leaving his huge paw prints in the snow for her smaller feet to follow. The wind was picking up again, snow falling thicker than it had in the previous months and carrying an odd selection of sounds through the trees. As she neared the hut, Kari dropped her stack of kindling at the sight of a great grey stallion by the front door. The wolf growled, threatened and wary by the eight-legged creature he perceived as unwelcome in his territory; or better yet, food.

"Shhh, Tom." Kari calmed the old protector with a series of soothing pats and under fur scratches. "That's Sleipnir, I know him."

Sleipnir looked directly at her upon hearing his name, ears prostrate as he snorted his recognition of a scent but not appearance. He whinnied softly, pawing at the ground as if in apology for a previous transgression whilst the small human girl set about picking up her firewood once again. Someone was here for her, they were inside the hut right now but mixed with relief was dread filling her throat with bile she tried to swallow back. Half her heart was here now, seeds sown and roots thick within Jotunheim's barren ground. Could she leave?

Hesitantly, Kari walked up to the hut door and took a great gulp of icy air to steady her resolve before throwing her back against the wood and pushing it open. Tom brushed past her, instantly growling once more at the intruder within but quieted by the elder Jotun sat around the fire with company. There was a delicate, pregnant silence as the little girl stumbled into the hut and released her burden besides the crackling fire. A tall, stocky man sat directly across from where she stood, there gazes warped by the rising heat between them as he frowned at the mischievous blue tone of her skin. So used to the jump to transformation now, she hardly even recalled making herself appear unearthly as it had been an instinctual reaction to the situation of danger and further statement to her inner turmoil.

"Kari?" Balder hardly recognized the creature before him, the need to question her validity arising with the strong vocalization of her name. "You appear not yourself."

"Little one," the younger sister patted her knee and pulled the girl in closer to hold safe against her fears, "emerge as you are."

Kari jolted at the woman's words, a tirade of overwhelming thoughts and emotions filling her head in a tumble of chaotic unrest. Did she want her to go? Stay? Be one thing, the other or neither? Why? Why was he here? Why not someone else? Why now?

"WHY!" She screamed at the startled warrior, not a question but an angry curse at the man who had come to tear her from so loving arms she had discovered in solace and further clung to now. "WHY NOW? WHERE WERE YOU?"

"Hush, little one." The giantess scooped her still higher, until buried and wrapped neatly in her embrace to devolve from livid outburst to sobbing mess.

"No, no, no, no!" Kari shook her head with every denial, muffled by how hard she clung to the maternal figure that held her.

This had not been the mission he had anticipated. A lost child finally located and sent to retrieve her in a harsh and barren realm. They had predicted her dead after some time missing, only to discover a trace leading to Jotunhiem with a further expectation of death or great harm. Instead, Balder had been led to a hut in the middle of nowhere, populated by kindly old frost giantesses and though appearing alarmingly jotun the little girl was healthy and seemingly well cared for. The warrior looked from the fire he had been studying over to the elder jotun, ignoring as best he could the upset noise coming from his right, and raised an eyebrow in silent query.

"Wait outside." She responded after a moment of silent reflection, watching the asgardian rise from his seat before heavy-footed making his way out the door.

"What say you sister?" The younger looked across the fire for guidance as to the clinging ball sat on her lap.

"She is not ours to keep."

"I don't… want to… go." Kari rattled between sobs.

"And will you stay? Make asgardian deities our enemies?" The elder sister rumbled darkly - a little bit of poison sometimes the same as a cure. "What of your family? Friends? Will you forsake them? Do they mean so little that you will cast them aside never to return after they have searched for you so long?"

"Stop it!" Kari buried her head further still in the younger sisters hold.

"Come now, little one." She rose from her chair, taking two long strides to meet the cuddled pair and introduced her own hands to the mesh. "Jotunheim is not a realm meant for you. My words are harsh because I care and the action we must take,' she nodded to her younger sibling as she returned the gesture solemnly, "is harsher still. Collect your things, say your goodbyes and try to forget this place from your memory."

"I don't want to forget any of you." Kari whispered, peeling herself out of the tangle of arms far enough to look up at the two women.

Gazes softened, a pause in time felt between the three-way stare before both giantesses took a turn to kiss the forehead of the last child their household would know. She was lowered to the ground, feeling deserted for a moment but recovering fast enough to scamper over to the aging wolf panting on the covers of her bed. He was unaware of what was happening, whining softly at the joy of being hugged and smothered in affection from his wayward pup. Distracted by whispering farewells and babbling nonsense in his ear she paid no mind to the fussing nature of the giantesses behind her collecting her few possessions together wrapped in cloth. When she finally let go of the wolf and turned her teary eyed attention back to the room the sight of the small package only made her cry again.

Arms were wrapped around her once more, utterances of reassurance hovering in the air like warm bubbles on cool skin. When shaky calm was restored all three were left wiping damp away with the back of hands.

"Last child that we will know." The younger sister messed the girl's hair gently.

"Your rescuer awaits you." The elder chuffed, amused by Balder but somber yet as she leaned down to drape a chain over the girl's head. "To remember us by."

Kari followed the too long chain down to the centre where a clear bauble light as air dangled. It appeared empty at first but as she lifted it between her forefinger and thumb came alive with the twinkle of white within. It was like a snow globe, particles of white swirling around inside appearing and disappearing as she moved it.

"Thank you." She blinked, looking between both her guardians with a gift of her own to remember her by; the biggest smile she could muster.

"Go."

She nodded at the statement, tucking the chain inside her fur coat and picked up her package of things with one final look behind her as she headed to the door. They were watching her, listening to the sound of the door creaking open and silent still as she disappeared from sight. An end to another journey. Why did all roads seem to lead to asgard though?

Kari scowled as she looked up at Balder, checking Sleipnir's bridle for some unknownable time as he waited. He frowned back at her, not having changed her appearance back from the blue skinned version he had previously witnessed. A strange woman and stranger still as a child.

"I will help you up." He took her bundle from her, tying it securely to the saddle. "We must ride several miles upward of the mountains to reach the place where in Loki may bring us undetected back."

"Loki?" Kari growled out the trickster's name.

"Indeed, the prince was instrumental in your discovery and additionally your liberation." He paused to lift her reluctantly into the saddle. "Odin forbade your retrieval via the bifrost for fear it would upset King Laufey but Loki refused to give up and formulated a plan to sneak someone in through a hidden passage. You should thank him for his tireless diligence when we return to asgard."

"Oh should I now?" She gritted her teeth, mind ablaze with payback related plans; a welcome distraction from the heartbreak stirring in her chest.


	37. Chapter 37: Just a dream

Eyes downcast focused on the movement of hooves beneath her, her ears full of fluff, mind numbed by the cold of a world far off somewhere in the cosmos. Sleipnir halted; she blinked at the stillness and ignored the shift of weight behind her as Balder dismounted. Muffled words collided in the air around her, trying to breach her defenses but repelled with a dismissive sigh as she was lifted down from atop the stallion.

"Kari, my dear?" Fandral was hesitant despite Balder's assurance this blue-skinned, red-eyed creature was in fact his granddaughter. "What have they done to you?" He caressed her cheek, pushing back the braids covering her face and tried to force her gaze to meet his. "Loki, do something."

Her pupils dilated at hearing the trickster's name, head snapping to follow the smooth voice of the god of mischief talking so casually to her grandfather. Did they not know of his guilt? Probably not, the monster likely denied knowledge of ever seeing her when she went 'missing' or made some equally ridiculous claim. Something in her mind tore, a sense of morality cracked the day she smacked the fish dead against a tree trunk. Here he was, Loki prince of asgard, plucking fish from a stream and holding her by the tail ready to beat her into something consumable. It was survival; she was going to kill him.

Kari shook from her grandfather's hold, about her shoulders, clenching her hand into a fist as ice formed like a sword around her arm. She threw herself at the trickster, fury felt and heard as she screamed at the surprised prince without time to brace himself for impact. Thrusting her arm into him, it seemingly slipped through followed by her body as she gasped and hit the ground unexpectedly. Rolling onto her back she saw the illusion disappear, Loki smirking at the attempt on his life now behind a stunned Balder.

"I'm going to kill you." She growled, back on her feet and trying to fight her way out of Fandral's capturing arms. "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU LOKI!"

"She has gone wild!" Fandral struggled, scooping her off her feet to try and halt her progression toward the prince.

"IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!" She clawed at her grandfather, escape and attack the only judgment running through her mind. "EVERYTHING! IT'S ALL HIS FAULT!"

"Help me!"

"HE DID IT!" She pointed Loki out, gaze never removing from his entertained expression despite the swarm of arms jumping into the fray to control her. "HE SENT ME THERE!"

"Her mind has been perverted." Volstagg grabbed her as she escaped Fandral's clutches via biting and pinned the fighting child against his rounded belly whilst Thor got a face full of her left foot.

"NO! LET ME GO! IT'S ALL LOKI!"

She was pinned down, Sif having taken matters into her own hands and sat on the girl to keep her from irrational behavior. Body aching, lungs finding it difficult to draw breath from the pressure on top of her, Kari finally relented though her eyes remained transfixed on green keeping a safe distance. Oh he was loving this, even after a year apart he still derived pleasure from seeing her squished beneath him. The difference now, however, was Kari felt no fear of retaliation; a hold was broken, harness loosened and in the end she felt sure she would make him bite down on the bit before being reigned in.

"-gone mad." Fandral's exasperated words fluttered through the raging ringing in her ears.

"It will take time, friend." Volstagg interjected. "Who knows what cruelty may have befallen her in that ghastly realm."

"But why does she look so?"

"It is her choice to." Loki, still holding her stare, explained. "It appears, Karian Motter, has discovered magical talents in the fields of transformation and the element of ice. Certainly an explanation as to how she managed to survive so long in Jotunheim alone."

"I found her living with frost giantesses." Balder added.

"Frost giantesses?" Fandral was shocked, possibly appalled and hissed at a rather vicious looking scratch mildly weeping vertical along his neck. "They are the cause of this?"

Trying to drown out the continued conversation, adults as always talking about her like she was not right there, Kari dissolved her glaring contest with Loki to stare at the ground. She wanted to cover her ears, so as not to hear how they spoke and the casual uses of vile words like 'monsters' in reference to her year long guardians, but her hands were pinned to her back and held tight by the lady warrior. Shutting her eyes, forehead resting on the dirt beneath her, she willed her mind not to hear anymore through gritted teeth. It was to no avail, however, what little of her person not weighed down beginning to shake at the overwhelming desire to cry. She shook her head, rubbing the dirt in until mixed with the prickle of tears turning to mud and panted heavily in hyperventilating fashion.

The crowd around her, above her, finally became silent as she screamed as loud and long as she could over and over. It was the only way out, her head becoming lighter as she screamed to bursting point again forcing her body to go without the oxygen it so hungrily craved. It was such a relief when darkness finally took her and she could hear no more.

She knew not the length of time having passed when she next awoke but light was filtering in through the windows as she remembered it used to during the mornings. The room was warm, uncomfortably so as she was no longer accustomed to asgard's seasons. Blinking in the swirling gold ceiling decorations she allowed the fuzziness from her eyes to clear before turning towards the sounds of shuffling paper. A red haired, serious, sort of woman sat in a chair besides the bed thumbing bored through a book. It took her a long glance to recognize the woman with how much she had changed since last seen. She was dressed far nicer than a year ago, her hair tied high with various adornments and there was a definite protruding swollenness to her belly – Egill had been busy.

"Prue?" Kari croaked, pushing the blankets off her chest to release some of the uncomfortable heat underneath as she strained to sit with a bruised and aching body.

"You are finally awake." Prue sighed; annoyed and relieved at the same instance and placed her book down to lean in closer to fill the girls forehead. "We were worried, you have been unconscious for several days with a fever."

"A fever?"

"Yes, you have been very ill." The redhead pulled away, returning a moment later with a cup of water she poured from the side table. "Drink this."

"Thank you." Kari sipped the thirst-quenching beverage as the other woman helped her keep it steady. "I feel… strange."

"Strange?"

"Yeah, like… this were a dream?"

"You are still recovering, girl." Prue placed the cup back on the table, a layer of concern etched across her features. "It will take time to get back to full strength."

"Yes but… I can't… everything is so… I can't focus on where I was."

"Where you were? You have always been here, girl."

"No, I… I remember snow and leopards and wolves and-"

"A dream." She tore her from reminiscing.

"A dream?" Kari repeated as if captivated by the meaning.

"The fever made you delirious, you were rambling in your sleep about all sorts of nonsense."

"I was?"

"Yes, now lay down and rest whilst I tell the others you are awake." Prue stood, waiting for her to shimmy lower on the bed before tucking her under too warm blankets once again.

Watching her friend vacate the room, Kari frowned at the explanation she had just heard. A dream? Was everything that happened in the last year a jumbled up dream? Why did her head hurt so much? Strange flashes of memory dancing in and out of her vision that burned her mind with how realistic but divorced from her they felt. Playing in the fields, going swimming with Garthar, Dagur and the others. Eating in the dining hall every night, sat next to her grandfather telling her stories she could not remember beyond a variation of syllables. It looked real, but it did not feel as real as the dream she now only half remembered. The giantesses, fishing, Tom, snow leopard kittens and even the bullies in the village; they were fading like the snow melts in spring.

What was happening? What was real?

"Kari, my dear!" Fandral was strolling towards her, his horrible moustache upturned to follow the spreading smile on his face. "You are awake. How do you feel?"

She stared at him, as if not knowing him, which caused him to slow his pace and descend his arms from the promised hugging position they had been in. A wary gaze, furrowing of brows on either side, as they studied one another from a short distance.

"Kari?" He queried, tentatively as he came closer still as if approaching a frightened animal.

"Granddad?" She sucked in a lungful of air, preparing herself for what she would say next. "How did you get that mark on your neck?"


	38. Chapter 38: The wizard's apprentice

She was sick and tired of hearing everyone's reasonable explanations for things she knew were part of the memories she could no longer remember. It was not a dream, she had not made it up and the images that filled her head now were devoid of anything reasonably realistic. It was like seeing someone else's opinion on how she acts and feels.

Fandral had gotten a good scare when he discovered her that morning watching him whilst he slept. It was not a malicious act, though her facial features were scowling like one thinking about murder, but the need to study him had arose during the night when she had, had another dream about a horse ride ending in the warrior receiving a scratch down his neck. The mark was faded now, unnoticeable but she still had to look at it and remind herself what was reality. Of course, her grandfather had almost had a heart attack, accusing her of something untoward before becoming calm once more and shuffling her back to bed.

First time in almost two weeks she had finally been allowed out of her grandfather's rooms. Prue having stopped by to have a whispered conversation with Fandral about her behavior that resulted in the red head suggesting she be allowed out to get some air. Being cooped up had not been helping her mood but being let out only continued to add to the knowledge something was wrong. Oh people were acting indifferent and ordinary to her sure, but Griffin, upon seeing him sun bathing in Frigga's garden had hissed and yowled at her like she were a stranger to him.

Frigga had tried to comfort her but Kari was unable to care and pushed the gentle hand placed on her shoulder away. It had hurt the queen, to be rejected so harshly by the child keeping her back firmly turned towards her. Nothing more was said, no words of comfort or silly flowers with a ridiculous meaning, only the low growl of a tawny-eyed cat furious at an owner for a crime she was sure Loki was responsible for. Everything, it was all Loki's fault. She could not even remember what exactly he had done but the feeling held tight like golden threads that it was all the tricksters doing.

As Griffin turned about face and stalked off up a pathway so did Kari turn in the opposite direction and walk away. There were no allies left for her too find in this place, not even the one she brought with her. She meandered through corridors, not caring where she was going until finding her way to the top of the stairs leading down towards the city. A momentary thought occurred, that maybe children would be less hindered with secrecy and casually divulge some information she craved. A shame she knew not where any of her young friends lived, a bizarre occurrence if she really had been playing with them for a year never to follow them home at any point.

Frowning further still at a hand now braced on her head and messing up her curls, Kari glared sidelong at a Loki shaped beast distracting her from the scenery she had been admiring. She slapped his hand away as he chuckled at the hatred in her eyes and pushed her self away from the wall she was leaning on.

"None of this is real!" She spat at him.

"Your mind is still befuddled." He sighed, lifting her chin with his index finger to get a better look at her too big eyes. "Brain fever afflicting small uncomplicated things will have that effect."

"Get off me!" She squirmed out of his clutches, turning her back to him with the crossing of her arms. "This is not a Jane Austin book and nobody gets 'brain fever'."

"I was unaware you took pleasure in such tawdry romance novels."

"I hate you." She muttered under her breath, shocked when he leaned in closer to her ear.  
"I know." He whispered back, a quiet chuckle escaping his lips as he straightened away from her glaring eyes. "Now, if you are well enough to procrastinate and shout then I believe it is time you return to your studies. Come little apprentice."

"What? I'm not your apprentice."

"Dear me, forgotten our lessons and all the good times shared?" He mocked her with his fake hurt. "No wonder you are so disagreeable."

"What are you-ow!" She bit her lip, hands held tight over her ears as she rocked unsteadily at a sudden burst of pain searing its way through her skull.

"Karian?" Loki was kneeling in front of her, a look of concern etched across his face but all she could see was the luminous green of his eyes devouring her.

It was like a key had turned and a box full of new images had been set loose in her minds eye. The library, Loki, books and… were they drinking tea in most of these weird memories?

"I don't even like tea!" She screamed at him, pushing him as hard as she could but unable to knock him anywhere near off balance.

"Calm yourself."

His tone was stern, capturing her flailing arms as he pulled her against his chest. She continued to struggle as he held her against him, confused and skittish, panting for oxygen until overwhelmed by her own fatigued mind and going limp against him.

"There, there." He soothed, smoothing her hair with one hand and wrapping her close with the other as he kissed her forehead.

A whimpering sound was all she could make, pathetic and useless resting her head against his shoulder. He lifted her up, she hated being carried like the child she looked but at the same time welcomed someone else taking the burden of weight off her legs. She ordered herself not to cry, only lay against him and stare down at the ground behind him as he casually carried her back inside the palace. They were headed for the library, she knew this without having to look up and see their direction because it was the most logical course.

When they arrived, he dropped her like a rag doll in a smaller version of his chair just right for her size. Maybe she really had been here all this time, Loki's apprentice as he had sort of promised the day she drank the blue stuff. Why else would there be a chair and desk just for her here now? She reached forward, thumbing through a book left on the child-sized desk full of pictures and writing she understood. This was Jotun; everything inside, towards the bookmark placed between the pages, all the magic she knew she knew. Working with the ice elements, minor transformation spells, it was all here.

Hearing a tinkling of china, she looked up startling Loki for a second, as he had not expected to see her wearing her blue-skinned red-eyed getup. He rolled his eyes at her, continuing forward until he could release his tray onto his taller desk. It was a tea set, she scowled at it as it matched the emerging memories and watched as he set about pouring hot water between the cups.

"I have asked you countless times not to do that." Loki sighed, lifting a teacup and placing it in front of her cringing form. "It makes the guards uneasy and scares the women."

"I don't know what you mean." She snarled softening as the smell from the steaming cup finally reached her nostrils. "What is this?"

"Your favourite drink." He responded woefully as if she had deeply offended him by liking something he did not and slumped into his chair to watch her.

"How can it be my favourite drink if I don't know what it is." Kari grumbled lifting the cup up to her lips and blowing the heat from the surface quickly before sipping the contents. "Oh god…" She mumbled, it was lovely, like honey and berries drenched in a warm loving coat now heating her cheeks with passion. She remembered it, but the memory made it taste synthetic and paled to the full glory of reality.

"You see? Would I lie to you?"

"All the time."

Loki chuckled at the joke between them, pausing to enjoy his tea as the girl beside him hummed her appreciation of the fruity thing she was drinking. Girls and fruity things, why always the fruity things? A musing for another day, he resolved, placing his cup back on the tray and leaning across to retrieve the book on his apprentice's desk.

"No more ice giant nonsense." He idly tossed the book towards a stack of tomes he was meaning to read or return or something and replaced it with a larger greener looking book with a 'thump' on her desk. "It is about time you learn an important subject as this one."

"Illusion?" She read the title giving him a stern look in response. "The art of showing people lies. How very you."


	39. Chapter 39: Rainbow kisses

As bizarre, as liquidated as her brain felt, a sense of normality did finally return in time – the greatest of all healers. Fandral even started bringing women home with him again, not that she cared but it did give her ample opportunity to pilfer a little wine left lying around. You could stick the woman in a girl but not remove it after all.

Currently, Kari was laying face first in an empty plate in the dining hall. She had an epic hangover of the horrendous kind, lights were too bright, her nose too itchy and Loki's face across the table was really pissing her off.

"Smirking bastard…" She mumbled as Fandral turned his attention to her with a prod of his finger.

"Is my little finger smith feeling the ramification of bad judgment?"

"Urgh…" Kari rolled her head away from her grandfather's prying only to realize Thor was getting ready to bug her on the other side. "I'm a grown woman… I'll do what I want."

"Yes, you appear fully grown in my eyes, Fandralkin." Thor laughed, lifting her head from her plate in order to pile food onto it. "You shall eat a full meal fit for a grown woman."

Kari groaned at the mix match of touching food groups slopped in front of her. It was almost as big as she was by the time Thor was done and got back to his own plate with a meaty grin. Everything smelt vulgar, her stomach swirling angrily as she slumped her head onto a palm and rested her elbow beside the plate. She started picking at the items, hardly eating a thing but making a good show of it for the ravenous smiling devouring bimbo sat besides her. Where did he put it all? Why was he not as fat as Volstagg? She needed to discover his secrets, write a diet book and make millions on earth. What would she do with earth money anyway? They did not accept that sort of currency anywhere in asgard.

Tearing some bread from the large slice on her plate, she dipped it idly in some sort of savory sauce she only knew by its description – reddish green sauce with bits in it. Loki was still smirking, having a lovely conversation with some woman with much too pretty blonde hair. She was not jealous, she just hated seeing him happy and also his lady friend's much too pretty face was bothering her too. They were laughing now, his mouth wide to accommodate the humor he found in whatever the hugely cleavaged woman had said that was so funny.

With a snigger of her own, Kari flicked the sticky sauce covered lump of bread with her middle finger and watched it fly narrowly missing the tricksters wide open gob but still making a lovely squelching sound as it struck his cheek. The god of mischief froze, projectile sliding downwards until it dripped off his chin with a muffled patter on his plate below. Thor had immediately erupted into a great burst of mirth, pointing his brother out with a chicken thigh as pretty-young-lady friend grimaced at both the princes in turn.

"I no not if you are aware, brother, but there is something on your face." The god of thunder continued to chuckle through a large mouthful, spewing a flicker of mixed provisions on people around him.

"Thank you, brother." Loki responded rather calmly, lifting a napkin to his face and casually wiping the trail of sauce away.

Kari had already slipped under the table, trying to avoid suspicion as well as Thor's messes. It was peaceful and dark under here, the perfect place to hide with a hangover and dually get up to mischief. There was Loki's boots and next to them was his companion's slippered feet. A devious plan spun forward in her mind, Kari crawling closer to the pretty woman's feet and carefully pulling the bows adorning the tips of her shoes free before tying the left to the right. So caught up in mischief she failed to notice Loki's head appearing under the table to watch her.

"Undo your mischief immediately." He angrily whispered.

"Do it yourself." She stuck her tongue out at him, crawling out of his reach before he could grab a hold of her and clambered back onto the bench.

"Ah, there you are, my dear." Fandral helped her back into place. "I had thought you lost."

"Dropped an earring." Kari shrugged and giggled at the confused look on her grandfather's face.

"And did you find it, my dear?"

"Oh I think I-"

There was a disturbance ahead of them, a blonde haired, pretty faced, large cleavage attempted to stand before tripping and landing into the god of mischief's waiting arms. Loki cut her a quick glance across the table, he was very pleased with himself as he plastered his lady friend with platitudes and felt it was best he carry her out of the room to safety. Kari glared after them; he had ruined her plans and taken them for his own – the bastard.

"Granddad…"

"Yes my dear?"

"Wasn't that one of your women?"

"Ahhhahaha." Fandral spluttered into an uncomfortable laugh. "I know not what you refer to."

"No… now that I've seen her in a horizontal position she looks really familiar." Kari creased her brow in recollection. "Like that snoring blonde woman you were with the other night."

"No… No I think not."

"I'm pretty sure, the cleavage is really quite unmistaka-mmfmffffmmmhhh." Fandral held his hand tightly over her mouth so as to muffle the rest of her recounting.

"What is this talk?" Thor was on the scene, ears becoming alert at the word 'cleavage'.

"Nothing, friend, nothing." Fandral shook his head, pulling his granddaughter further into his clutches so she could not escape.

"Your kin seems to have something to say on the matter." The prince was dreadfully curious now, secrets and intrigue galore.

"Kari is feeling dreadfully unwell after drinking the wine she came upon last night, is that not so my dear?" He forced her head to nod, continuing to keep her mouth covered as she glared at him. "And now she is going to go away somewhere and do something that does not involve idle gossip."

She was lifted off the bench, deposited like a parcel on the floor and then shooed on by a bad Robin Hood impersonator. Oh she was so going to 'accidentally' walk in on him in the throws of passion tonight and if possible convincingly vomit on his bed sheets like a poor little granddaughter with a sick tummy. Treat her like a child and shoo her out to play, be careful what you wish for granddad.

Skipping off down the steps of the palace, she headed out through the city to the fields. It hardly took any time at all to come across a selection of children running through the tall grass collecting coloured cloth tied around one another's waist. It was a game of capture the flag, girls were even involved for this one though the boys seemed confused as to how much grabbing they were allowed to do. It was an awkward age for most of them. Before she could make it to the main group, Kari was set upon by a decidedly thinner Dagur catapulting her to the ground. She kicked him off, annoyed at his messing of her hair and sat on him to force the laughter from his chest to deflate.

"Get off!" Dagur moaned, thrashing left and right like an upturned turtle.

"Say you're sorry." Kari folded her arms, keeping her weight firmly on him.

"Stupid girl!"

"Smelly boy!"

"Oh that is it!" He threw her from him, clambering onto his feet to chase her squealing into the grass. "Get back here!"

"No!" She laughed, disappearing into the huddle of children celebrating over their victory of collecting blue cloth.

Out on the field was always fun, the best of times with the best of people who did not talk down to her like she was somehow beneath them. Though, if she were being honest, she was sort of beneath everyone at the palace with how tall they were and short she was. Getting to show off was pretty good too; none of the other children were much good or proficient in anything yet so anything she showed them was looked upon as new and interesting. There had been a lot of 'ooh'ing and awed sounds when she had made several duplicates of herself to run in opposite directions as Dagur chased her. Poor boy had not known which way to run; even if the illusion only lasted a few seconds it was plenty of time to hide herself elsewhere. Lessons with temperamental, old man Loki were not entirely wasted things – even if he did torment her a little on the side. Lessons with Fandral were really boring now though, he would not let her near anything sharp and pointy at all anymore so it was all little wood sticks and mocking tones of 'that is very good, my dear' as he feigned deflecting her weak attacks; sometimes with a theatrical grunt added to make it more realistic – not that he ever seemed to realize just how insulting his drama was.

As the crowd of children thinned out, heading off for lunchtime meals, Kari spotted two familiar looking adults towards the back of the field. Prue and Egill enjoying a picnic under an old apple tree. She snuck over to them, careful not to be seen and climbed the tree to watch them from the branches above. Could that have been her? If she had married Egill of course, it had very almost happened if not for Prue saving her. Maybe she would still be an adult, happy, in love, with a baby on the way. Right, scratch that last bit Karian Motter was not anywhere near ready for annoying sprogglets puking and stinking up the place.

She cringed at the thought but soon recovered into a longing sigh as Egill reached over to feed his wife pie. They shared a laugh, kissed tenderly then went back to their idle, happy, conversation about nothing and everything. Oh, to be in love.

"What are you doing?" Garthar poked his head around her shoulder to look at what she was so interested in.

"Shhh." Kari hushed him, the boy frowning at the secrecy but doing as he was told and lowering his voice, as he got more comfortable on the branch beside her.

"Who are they?"

"That's Prue and that's Egill." She pointed them out at the mention of their names. "I almost had to marry him."

"What? But he is old."

"Yeah, but I was old then too."

"You are weird, Kari."

"I know." She chuckled, Garthar shaking his head but joining in the quiet laughter.

"Yuck, why are old people always doing that?" He shuddered in disgust as Prue and Egill went back to sloppy kisses.

"Because, it's fun." Kari shrugged.

"How do you know?" He gave her a disbelieving look.

"I used to do it a lot. There is all kinds of it: french kissing, german kissing, porn star kissing, good girl kissing, bad girl kissing, rainbow kissing… but you never ever, ever want to get involved in a rainbow kiss. That shit is nasty."

"What are you even talking about?" Garthar was thoroughly confused and mildly disturbed at once.

"I don't even want to describe it's… it's so disgusting."

"Oh…" He looked down at the canoodling couple below them only vaguely aware of what they were discussing. "Well, could you just show me then?"

"A rainbow kiss?" Kari leaned away from him, horrified that anyone would ask for a demonstration of that most heinous of kisses.

"No…?" Garthar frowned, pausing to catch his breath and thoughts before continuing. "Just a normal one I guess."

"Oh…" She stared wide-eyed ahead of her in stunned surprise now they were both on the same page again. " Uh… um… I… uhahaha… that'd be kind of weird…"

"Why? We are friends are we not?" He kicked his feet, casually, back and forth as if what he were asking a completely innocent request.

"Sure, yeah but… you're only supposed to kiss people that are your really, really, really good friends."

"I thought you said before that we are best friends."

"Yeah but… not like Prue and Egill and your mother and father are really good friends."

"Ugh, this is all complicated." He slumped forward, bracing his chin on both palms.

"Tell me about it." She agreed, joining him in an aggravated slouch as they watched the couple below them backing up there picnic basket before leaving. "I'm gonna head back home, I'm hungry."

"All right."

With an awkward shuffle, she made her way past her friend and slid down the tree trunk back to the ground below. Prue and Egill were a little further a head on the path as she patted dirt and debris from her clothes and made to chase after them. Might even have some pie left over for her to fill up on if she asked them.

"Kari?" She paused, hearing Garthar calling after her.

"Yeah?"

"I would not mind… you know… being really good friends with you." He came hesitantly forward, clearing his throat as he offered her a sorry looking flower he had obviously picked from the side of the path a moment before. "If you wanted to."

"That's uh… really sweet of you, Garthar." She giggled; taking the flower from him and twirling it round between her fingers.

The boy was flustered, hopping from one foot to the other as words tried to form on his tongue. He scratched his head, looking at her as she chuckled at his awkwardness again but before she could register the peculiarness of the look in his eyes, he had cleared the space between them tumbling into a clumsy kiss. That had shut her up, blinking several times at the unsure pressure on her lips. They were both blushing when he finally pulled away, taking several steps backwards until feeling safe by the distance between them.

"I will see you tomorrow then." He stated casually as if nothing had just happened.

"Huh?" Was all she could muster, not that the scarpering boy took any time to wait for a reply.

Was that what she thought it was? A little boy just kissed her. On what scale could she judge how wrong that just was? Garthar was about twelve and she a twenty-eight year old going on eleven. It was wrong, very wrong but at the same time she felt stupidly giddy about it. A boy never kissed her when she was eleven first time around. She had to wait for seventeen and a horrible experience with a nineteen-year-old, oh so mature idiot, with a car and ID to buy alcohol for that.

She ran back to the palace, bypassing smoochy old Egill and Prue on the way and scattered up the steps humming to herself. Not even Loki could upset her happiness right now, even if he was at the dining hall with that not as pretty as she first thought woman again.

"You look in love, my dear." Fandral helped her up onto the bench to sit at the table.

"Oh it is a curse, granddad." She chuckled, throwing her arms around his neck and planting a kiss on his cheek.


	40. Chapter 40: Smaller bras

Tossing, turning, covers wrapped and curled around her until choking her into gasping awakeness. Everything was damp, her body pouring sweat as she groaned and untangled her limbs before dropping unceremoniously from the bed to the cool of the floor below. It felt amazing, the cold marble beneath beating back the burning fire under her skin. Rolling onto her back, she tugged at the clinging nightshirt until managing to pull it loose and stretched her spine as best she could between pants for oxygen.

It was a joke, she had not meant to really be ill tonight and puke all over her grandfather. Besides, he had not brought anyone home with him, instead preferring the company of Volstagg and Hogun over several rounds of cards and that honey mead she really wanted to drink but was denied. Oh, damn that second helping of pudding she had or was it the duck tasting meat she ate; it had not sat right on her tongue and now she was paying for it.

A great seering agony forced its way through her spine; Kari curling into a ball and biting down on her fist to hold back the pitchless scream bottlenecked between her teeth. She was ready to start tearing her hair out when the pain continued to migrate downwards into her thighs but by that point her brain had, had enough and finally hit the off switch.

When she awoke next light was beginning to pour in through the windows, the sunrising to greet a new day but she felt truly awful. Her skin prickled, muscles aching and bones sore as she tested gentle movement of her limbs. She felt worse than the time she bought a gym membership and tried to show off to a really hot looking guy by using every piece of equipment he did on the first day – she never did go back but was that not the point of new years resolutions.

Rolling onto her front, she lifted herself up slowly onto her knees and wiped the droplets of sweat hindering her eyes. A bath would be a good option and maybe have her grandfather fuss over her later like a grandparent was supposed to with a young child. Being small did have its perks sometimes. Kari braced her weight on the side of the bed, using it to hoist her fatigued body back onto shaky feet and stumbled towards a closet for a towel. She had not recalled the shelves being so low before, used to bringing a stall over to help her reach the very top.

Kari frowned, this stank of something familiar, her hands instantly going straight for her chest as she groped two mounds now protruding there. Continuing to manhandle herself, she limped over to a mirror and stared at the reflection with several blinks to assure herself that her eye sight was clear. She turned left, then right, gaze looking up and down several times to catalogue what exactly was changed. Clearly taller, older but a lot perkier than she had been originally. This was evidently not her twenty-something body, more accurately, what she recalled her seventeen-year-old self once looked like. Well she had been daydream since yesterday afternoon about being seventeen again after Garthar and his awkward kissing skills. Was that blue stuff Loki gave her still working perhaps? Was it not supposed to wear off or something?

"Right… well." She nodded at her reflection. "Good job, stay this way forever please."

The doppleganger nodded back, then smiled in unison as both versions of Karian Motter were in agreement. She could probably wear her old clothes again, drink alcohol and not be spoken down to like a child. On the other hand, what would her smaller friends reactions be to this change? The whole silly romance with Garthar was a definite no, no now that he was officially jailbait. She could think about the logistics of everything later, right now her sweat covered manky seventeen-year-old self needed a long soak in a tub.

Grabbing a towel, Kari wrapped it lazily around herself and made her way into the small bathroom. Upon seeing the stool she used to ordinarily get into the bath she chuckled and kicked it to the side before climbing in of her own accord. As the water started pouring in, warmth encircling her body, she lazily sunk lower and hummed pleasantly at the sensation of clean permeating her pores. It would have remained a lovely relaxing time if it had not been for Volstagg bursting in on her looking to relieve himself.

She screamed, the fat warrior making his own surprised sound as he stumbled backwards into the door alerting Hogun on the case with his daggers drawn. Screaming at the second intruder, Kari sunk as low as she could in the water and started flinging whatever was at hand at the two warriors, now in retreat, as Fandral now collided with them half dressed and looking for a maiden to rescue.

"What is all this?" He looked around wildly, sword in one hand, trousers held up with the other. "Who is this?"

"Granddad get out!" Kari scolded, hitting him square in the chest with a bar of soap as he came to some realization and pulled the door to the bathroom shut behind him. "Oh my god…"

She sunk into the bath once again, rinsing out her hair before clambering out of the tub and wrapping the towel around her once more. What were those louts still doing here? Probably passed out drunk in the main room after too much mead the night before and now stumbling around bursting in on young women in baths. How very asgardian of them.

Grumbling audibly, she exited the bathroom pausing to shout angrily that it was free and storming back into her room with a loud door slamming 'thud'. Batchelors, stupid men and their mindless inability to knock. It would not have bothered her before when she was physically eleven but now she had lady lumps to look out for again and her honor or some dribble like that. A thought suddenly occurred to her as she was filtering through her trunk of adult clothing; was she a virgin again? She certainly hoped not, that would just be the icing on the cake of evil to have to relive with all its tight aching awkwardness. Oh and her bra's no longer fitted, perfect, too small for adultwear still.

Throwing on a green tunic and jeggings without underwear, Kari wandered back into the main room with several apologies thrown at her that she kindly ignored. Her grandfather was fully dressed now, though his hair was a state and the inside of his head probably worse still.

"Granddad, I need to go get new clothes again." She folded her arms, staring at him sternly as he gave a dispondant sigh.

"I hear tell children grow at startling speeds but could you try to take things a little slower on your poor grandfather, my dear."


	41. Chapter 41: Mouth to mouth

Going into the city had been fun, getting new clothes and having her grandfather following around behind her carrying things. Shopping trips was definitely one of the things she missed about earth but at least Asgard had some pretty weird stuff to look at too. It was kind of hard finding non-frilly long skirted garments for women but she had managed to successfully discover a few oddities to work with and at least one knee length tunic dress she did not mind as bad as the others – with how flattering it looked on in a pale blue.

Fandral mostly napped on the expedition, waking only to move on or chat up blushing maidens also looking for clothing. He was surprisingly good at picking out outfits for women though ignored his granddaughter's choices as much as possible. They hardly agreed on anything, his opinion being that everything she tried on being too tight and revealing on her but just fine on any other lady that entered the premises. She really needed Prue or Sif or just someone who was not related to her whilst doing this sort of thing.

By the time they got back to the palace it was gone lunchtime, Fandral rather grumpy at having missed a meal and left his granddaughter alone in her room to sort out her belongings whilst he went to the kitchens to sweet talk pie and ale for himself. She was late for a lesson with Loki, by several hours, but it hardly bothered her, as she was sure it would not affect him either. It was not as if he stuck around much during designated teaching times anyway, he mostly wondered in, put a book down and told her to read it before disappearing to wherever for a few hours sometimes coming back to have tea and point out how badly she was doing. It was like taking classes from the Grinch; which she highly suspected was a real story about Loki visiting earth one Christmas – she should probably ask him about it at some point.

Heading out of Fandral's rooms she pondered about what arrangements would probably change now that she had returned to a somewhat adult form. Would she be going back to her old room in the servants' quarters? Back to work as an asgardian waitress? There would not be much time in the day for her, as there had been for some time now, and it would be difficult to get used to once more. At least she should be allowed to drink alcohol openly again, that would always be a greatly appreciated bonus, especially with the amount of bullshit she had to put up with in a world full of medieval sexism and blatant favouritism.

For now all she had to worry about was finding Loki in a good mood - minus his lovely companion if at all possible. Upon arriving at the library, however, he was nowhere to be seen even when she called out to him receiving a repeating echo of her own voice in response. Perhaps he had gone out, up to some mischief or something. Oh well, she had other things to do anyway; like find Frigga. It had been a long overdue talk they needed to have, or at least Kari should probably apologise for being rude some time ago though she could not recall why she had been upset.

The queen was in her garden; at least someone was where they were supposed to be, tending to a selection of exotic looking lilies whilst a tabby cat preened his paws and whiskers at her side. Griffin was the first to spot the teenager 'umming' and 'ahhing' her way across the garden pathways towards them. His expression was neutral; tail swishing back and forth at the tip before a bright chirrup issued from his throat followed by the pitter-patter of paws padding towards the girl he used to know. Kari grinned, holding her hand out to her feline husband for a scratch behind an ear before straightening up to face the now watchful queen of Asgard.

"Hey… Frigga." Kari began awkwardly, playing with her fingers absentmindedly as her feline friend nuzzled against her ankles.

"I hardly recognized you, dear." Frigga responded casually with neither love nor hate.

"Yeah… kind of just happened last night out of the blue. Gave granddad a bit of a fright." She chuckled but trailed off when nobody else was even smiling with her – Griffin not being at fault as he was physically unable. "So I um…" She cleared her throat trying to form a somewhat coherent sentence. "I don't remember why I was rude to you, it's all sort of a jumble, I think I was angry about something but who knows what and I just, you know… wanted to say… I'm sorry for being a stupid bitch and stuff and I'm pretty sure I didn't mean it because uh… you're like one of the nicest people I know and… yeah."

"That was quite a garbled speech." Frigga shook her head with a snort of amusement. "Do not fret, children are seldom sane in their dealings with others. I must have disciplined Thor more times than I can count when he was young for worser offences."

"And Loki?"

"Loki was usually a good child."

"Are you sure?"

"One can never be entirely sure with Loki, but his heart has always been rooted firmly in the right place."

"Hmmm." Kari frowned, this seemed to be the same conversation they always had about the trickster; but who was right?

"Forgive my brashness but I must leave you, dear." Frigga smiled, gently squeezing Kari's shoulder as she passed her on the path. "I have duties I must attend to but it pleases me to see you again."

"Uh yeah, you too." She nodded, biting her lip anxiously as she watched the queen disappear from the garden with a trailing tomcat at her heels.

The cat had forgiven her it seemed, but his attentions were now fixed to an asgardian queen instead of a human waitress. Going up in the world, Griffin. She probably should have felt worse about it but who could begrudge a royal pussycat. Nobody could treat him better and at least Odin would not try to eat him or something to upset her.

She shook her head, chuckling at the thought of Odin and Griffin going at it in a ring. The king only had the one good eye left, if the feline got a good swipe in he could be left with none and the battle would be pretty lost for the greybearded old windbag. Then again he did have that big staff of his, could knock Griffin back from a distance but cat reflexes could maybe defeat that. This was a really close call, she could not decide who would truly prevail in an honest fight between the two.

Leaving the gardens her thoughts soon became distracted away from fight club related lunacy, however, as a tall strapping man came towards her passing by. Oh her hormones were sure running at full speed again, maybe even faster than her twenty-something bodies typical output what with added teenage bursts.

"Hey Balder." She flashed the confused looking warrior a toothy grin and hardly even noticed just how flirtacious she was being. "How's it going?"

"The day goes well." He slowed to a stop just ahead of her; still looking perplexed and a little lost. "And your day, lady….?"

"Lady?" She giggled, subconsciously touching her neck and drawing his attention to the bareskin there. "You think I'm a lady?"

"You are not a lady of the court?"

"No." She shook her head, biting down on her lower lip with a smile. "It's Kari… Fandral's granddaughter. You remember me right?"

"Truly?" He blinked, taken aback by the very sudden change from child to womanhood.

"Truly." She nodded with a further chuckle then spun to show off her new blue dress. "Is it the dress? Does it make me look like a lady?"

"I assumed because you were so, that is to say, yes, the dress." He agreed looking in both directions of the corridor in search for someone to latch upon to escape whatever mess he had gotten himself into. "I have somewhere to be. Another time, perhaps?"

"Sure." She rocked back and forth on her heels, arms behind her back as she gave a mock despondant sigh as the warrior cleared his throat giving a curt bow and hurried away from the giggling teenager. "Oh gosh, when did you get so handsome?" She sighed making sure to get a good eyeful of his retreating form until completely out of sight. "I need to get laid."

With a great big, very real this time, sigh Kari visibly deflated before perking up again and continuning her walk away from Balder's destination. It really had been a long time since she had seen any action, though a year of that was spent as a little girl who could hardly care less about sexy time or the attractiveness of men. Actually she had not even contemplated twice about Balder or Thor or anyone adult now she considered it; they had just been old men to her. Of course, now, they were hot men that needed to strip down in the rain and dance whilst she watched. Oh and Heimdall, how she missed his eyes and deep voice of seduction.

Sighing like a woman in lust, she stared at the ceiling in a bit of a daydream until a movement caught her attention. Across the next corridor, walking towards his rooms along a parallel adjoining route was Loki and his trailing 'I'm going out' diva cape. He had been out somewhere today, possibly with that giant breasted woman and probably had clean forgotten about her lesson – like she had.

Chuckling quietly she tiptoed after the trickster, the heavy thud of his boots never faltering once as he continued through the palace and around a corner. It was the perfect opportunity; she could not help the desire to prank him yet again before confusing him with her altered appearance. Peeking out from behind the corner he had just turned she concentrated a well of magic between her forefinger and thumb uttering words of power under her breath before tossing the spell outward. A sheet of ice crackled into life across the floor and right under his feet causing the prince to lose his balance and slip unexpectedly backwards.

There was a loud 'thump' as he landed hard on his back, the ice around his body shattering into diamond like shards as Kari laughed aloud at his embarrassment. She was folded over, hands braced to her knees as she continued to chortle but her amusement soon lulled into silence at the lack of movement from the body ahead of her. Loki was stock still, frozen in the same position he had landed in and seemingly unconscious. She frowned at the scene; unable to trust the god of mischief's ruse but came closer for an inspection just in case.

"Loki?" She quiered the body, tapping his side lightly with her shoe without response. "Stop messing around." She kicked him harder this time but he still stayed firmly in place. "I know you're fine, I saw you take Thor to the face once in the training yard so quit it." Her nerves were starting to fray at the aggravation of Loki faking his own death so poorly; she stepped on him putting half her weight onto his stomach to make him graon or something. "Loki?" All right, she was getting worried now, anybody sane would have gotten really pissed at being stepped on, was he even breathing? "Loki!" She tried shouting, kneeling down to lightly slap his cheeks as his head lulled from one side to the other. "Loki, wake up!"

Nothing still, he was pale – though he was always pale – and kind of cold – again always kind of cold – but it was really starting to scare her now. Had she just accidentally killed prince Loki of Asgard? Could he really be taken out by such clumsy means? Oh god, she was so in trouble.

Shaking him did no good, she laid her head on his chest checking to hear a heartbeat and thankfully finding one though it was rather sluggish and weak sounding. His chest was not rising; on further inspection she could not feel any breath leaving his lips either. Not dead yet, but certainly heading that way if she did not act quickly. How did that CPR stuff go again?

Kari swallowed, taking a steadying breath and straightened his neck lifting the chin upwards in order to tilt his head back slightly. It had been a long time since first aid classes at the restaurant and never in her life had she had to use any of this stuff on a living or dead human being but it was certainly coming back to her fast now. Grabbing his nose, she sucked in a deep breath and spread her lips over his open mouth forcing air into his lungs. However, the air came back in an unexpected burst that knocked her backwards choking at the forced expansion of her lungs.

Still reeling, trying to find her balance, arms grabbed onto her rolling her around as a large weight pinned her down. She spluttered several times more before her eyes readjusted to all the movement and coersion now realizing she was on her back with a very alive and conscious Loki on top of her.

His knee was braced between her thighs rather stimulatingly; she was sure she was getting a bit moist at the contact and hoped he was not aware. Oh and now she was blushing at the thought, way to go keeping all that automatic response to stimulai under wraps, this was old man Loki for goodness sakes. Horrifyingly he seemed to notice something was up, hopefully just the redness of her cheeks but he was inching closer. She gave a slight 'eek', eyes widening at the imminent whatever was impending involving his face and her face. He paused however, drifting a couple of inches from her lips and looked away from her eyes to admire the curve of her nose before grabbing it as she did to him.

"What is it you thought to accomplish by doing this?" He held on tight as she tried to pry his fingers from her nose to no avail.

"I thought you were dying or something and needed CPR." She sounded commically nasally, frowning up at him as he continued to squeeze her nose tightly shut. "You scared the beegee's out of me holding your breath like that."

"Primitive human medicine?" It was phrased as a question but not one for her to answer as he looked away thoughtfully.

"Could you get off me?" She tried asking in what she hoped was a nice, if a little odd sounding, tone of voice. "Or at least move your knee."

He raised an eyebrow looking along her body, as if only just noticing it was beneath him, to the point where his knee was holding the length of her skirt up into her crotch area and exposing her legs. Moving his leg further back, he lifted himself up into a kneeling position pulling his captive along with him by her nose and turned his head to the side as if appraising her worth.

"You see yourself as this now, Karian Motter." Loki was evidentally not very impressed. "How vain you have become."

"Uh?" She was startlingly bewildered and her nose was really starting to ache. "What are you going on about now, you annoying prick? I was just remembering when I was seventeen yesterday and woke up how I remembered looking back then. If I was being vain I would have remembered myself as having bigger tits than this and maybe somewhat taller with straighter hair. This is all your fault anyway! You and that stupid blue stuff and can you get the fuck off my nose already you're really starting to hurt me!"

"Even now still a failure." He tutted, letting go of her nose causing her to drop half way back to the ground as he ascended. "Not an ounce of hope."

She glared at his back, all his melodrama and snide comments she was sure were directed at her and not his experiment attempt – though technically she had also been the experiment attempt as well – were really grating on her last nerve. Stupid Loki and his stupid nose pinching. Damn swaggering bastard did not even bother to help her up before continuing on his merry way. Kari grimaced as she realized her mouth was now covered in his saliva from the mouth to mouth she had given him and rapidly began wiping her lips clean with the back of her hand. No teenage hormones could help his sorry case.


	42. Chapter 42: Bimboob

It was amazing how fast life returned to its original manner. She was working again, no longer able to lounge around and eat with the others as she had. It was lonely in the kitchens, however, Prue having risen up some hierarchical ranking system and now some sort of lady of leisure through marriage. The men in the dining hall had clearly forgotten how hard she could kick and needed retraining about where their hands were allowed to touch but at least that was somewhat fun for stress relief and added flattery.

The only difference from now and way back when was the fact her grandfather had not kicked her out. It was so much nicer in his rooms anyway; she got a double bed and a bathroom she only had to share with Fandral – who was ridiculously neat about his soaps and her messes. Part of her was sure her grandfather's leniency had something to do with his desire to keep a close eye on her though. He had been giving her frowny looks whenever they were out in the training yard practicing and she would intentionally ask Balder to help position her in stances both Fandral and she knew she knew very well. Flirting in front of her grandfather was not a good idea but it was the only time she had to make up some excuse to get Balder to come a little closer.

Loki… where to begin with that foul creature. Lessons with Loki had to be altered to accommodate her working hours, now beginning in the afternoons – when he remember not to be away – and involved her bringing him and his girlfriend lunch. The horrible blonde creature draped all over his arms was the ultimate definition of a bimbo having to ask what everything was all the time and still not really getting it; but hey, her boobs jiggled when she giggled.

Patronizing little harpy had even come to bug her in the middle of reading several times to make comments about how she could look sort of pretty if only she did something with her hair, clothes, face well everything really. Oh and Loki chuckled every time his lady friend said those things to Kari though possibly finding the greatest humor in the way she prickled and bit her tongue trying not to turn around and beat the giant cleavage to death with a book on transfiguration.

It was better when those two were not around, or at least not in the library because when they were in the library but not around Kari found she had to cover her ears and pretend not to notice some very unimaginative breathless phrases echoing off the walls. As if that was not enough, they would normally reappear flushed and smiling from some hidden recess and he would command she show him whatever she had learned for his seal of disapproval and bimboob's excited seal clapping viewing pleasure. Oh god did she wish she could some how make it look like a spell gone wrong and disintegrate them both. Actually, was that even a genuine spell? Definitely something to look into in the future.

All in all, things were not going well in the magical department. Kari had failed to learn anything beyond how to successfully transform wax into runny wax though it was supposed to become a rabbit. Thankfully Loki was not around to catch wind of the transfiguration blundering as he had disappeared several days ago with a rather cryptic farewell about going to see a Mayan about a calendar. He sadly had not taken his pouting, sighing cleavage with him; which disturbingly had a name – Serana.

"Is my princy still gone?" Serana trailed back and forth searching her lover out half-heartedly around the library.

"Yes." Kari groaned continuing to try and read her book unsuccessfully.

"I am so lost without him."

"Mhmm."

"It is as if my heart has been torn from my body and dissolved in a pit of fire." She leaned melodramatically onto Loki's empty desk.

"What?" Kari squinted, looking up over her book but quickly adverting her eyes at the amount of boob bracing dangerously against the woman's tight attire.

"I miss my Loki so much."

"Ewww?" She grimaced then corrected herself somewhat sarcastically. "I mean… awww that's so sad?"

"Why do you persist in reading such dreary books?" Serana was now leaning over Kari's shoulder, rubbing a tit against the teenager's cheek in order to disapprove of the tome. "They have hardly any pictures."

"They have swirly patterns though." She leaned her head as far away as possible from all the inappropriate skin contact.

"Oh they do!" Serana bounced, giving an excited clap and jiggle as she spotted the obvious. "You know-"

"If I braided my hair and wore some nice dresses and a little make-up I might look sort of pretty."

"That is just as I was about to say."

"Funny that." Kari rolled her eyes and sighed with relief as the strange blonde finally got off her shoulder to pace the floor once again.

"Are you sure my princy has not returned."

"He ain't here is he?"

"I do not see him." Serana looked thoughtful then began searching the rows of shelves again, as if she may have missed her beloved somehow. "Loki? Pray tell you are within this dusty place?"

"You know what, I'm gonna head out and do some uh stuff." Kari was up, placing her book down and heading for the door for a hasty escape; it was not as if she could get any work done with bimboob around anyway.

"But what if he comes back? I am sure he wished for me to watch over his apprentice and if he should return and find you gone…"

"Loki really doesn't give that much of a fig, Serana." She laughed dryly. "Catch you later." Waving off Loki's girlfriend, she sighed out of the library muttering to herself disgruntled. "Hopefully not."

"I will come with you."

"Please don't." Oh god, the harlot was following her.

"Where are we to go?"

"Seriously, please don't come, it'll be dull and boring and stuff. I'm just going to the fields outside the city to see my friends."

"You have friends?" Serana was shocked as if such a concept had not occurred to her before.

"Surprisingly." Pain, death, these were all good things to happen to the crazy cleavage jiggling besides her right now.

"The fields?" The bimbo was caught up in a mystery of interesting thoughts as she continued to stalk her prey through the palace. "I have not journeyed there before. My mother always told not to leave the safety of the city. What excitement we might have."

"Please…." Kari Begged. "It's just a bunch of kids slinging mud at each other."

"What say you? Young goats do not sling mud, they have not the limbs to capacitate such an act." She giggled, slapping Kari lightly on the arm for her folly.

"No… children." She corrected with an aggravated snort.

"Children and goats slinging mud in a field? This does not sound hygienic."

"Oh my god…" Kari palmed her face, needing a moment to reboot her cognitive abilities as she trailed her hand down her face only to see a shining ray amongst dark clouds. "Hey Balder."

"Balder the brave." Serana cut in ahead of her, practically throwing herself at the approaching warrior with a seductive smile. "How I have longed to meet you. Tales of your heroism have made me swoon so since I was but a girl."

"You embarrass me, my lady." Balder was captivated, his eyes captured longingly in her attentions on him and also possibly the odd little shoulder shake she was doing.

"Uh… Serana, remember Loki?" Kari was not about to let her have her man too.

"I am sure he will return soon." Serana shrugged, taking a step closer to the intrigued warrior and placing her hand ever so gently on his arm. "She worries so for her master."

"He is not my master." Kari scowled, arms folded and trying to move in closer to get between the pair unsuccessfully. "He just sometimes turns up to make a sarcastic comment about my magic studies when not away or having loud sexy time with you behind the book shelves."

"I know not what you speak of!"

"Kari Fandralkin do not speak such slanderous lies about a lady of the kings court." Balder was suddenly furious, all his attention on the teenager so as to deal out some harsh words. "I had expected better of your character."

"What? Seriously?" She could not help it, getting shouted at for telling the truth kind of made her act crazy. "Am I missing some sort of horrible joke here because I am not finding it funny. She's about as much a lady as I am a unicorn and she's probably slept with more men than me. Definitely when it comes to the residence of the palace."

"I will hear no more." Balder waved her off, turning his back to Kari in order to shield Serana's eyes from the wretch. "Lady Serana, please allow I to escort you safely from this common wench's presence."

"Oh Balder." Serana swooned against the warrior's side allowing him to take her with him.

It was sickening, or at least her stomach was swirling furiously with a mixture of emotions to the point she felt like puking. What had just happened? Serana and Balder? Balder and Serana? No, it could not happen, Serana was with Loki after being with Fandral and before that who knows. How could Balder be so stupid? How could he go off with that? It was just a pair of tits wearing a blonde wig for goodness sakes. How could he not believe her and call her a 'common wench' as well? After all that flirting and time practicing together in the training yard. All that hard work ruined by a cheap hussy that had been making her life hell for a while now anyway.

"Oh Balder." She mocked the tarts last words. "Fucking bitch."  
"Fandralkin!" Another bimbo appeared from somewhere behind her, exalted as he always was but soon taking preemptive step back at the look she shot him. "The fury in your eyes does not suit your fairness"

"Don't start."

"I meant no offence." Thor raised his hands in surrender at her vicious tone.

"I know!" Kari stamped the floor good and hard with a growl to calm down. "It's not you it's… that… woman your brother has been… the blonde one with the big boobs."

"Serana?"

"Yeah! Have you slept with her as well?" She pointed an accusing finger at the god of Thunder taking him by surprise.

"I should not like to-"

"Whatever! That fucking whore just started on Balder and tried to insinuate Loki is my master and then Balder got mad at me because I said it how it was with how that harpy has been really loudly screwing around with your brother in the library when I'm trying to study and that's not even the half of it. Then Balder got all chivalrous and called me a common wench. I am not a common wench!"

"I believe I follow." Thor grinned. "You take the betrayal against my brother very seriously."

"What?" Her eyes refocused on him, distrustful of the cheeky amusement plastered all over the prince's face.

"No use in hiding it from me, Fandralkin. I have had my suspicions you are attracted to my brother for some time now."

"What?!" She abseiled backwards as if his words would somehow infect her with a Loki love virus.

"Do not deny it. The strange courtship the two of you dance-"

"No! NO! N. O. No!" She confirmed on repeat until his smiling face froze to accommodate room in his brain for listening. "There is no courtship or attraction or whatever between me and that snake you call a brother. I'm mad because Balder called me a common wench and went off with that whore."

"I know not what to say, Fandralkin." Thor shrugged.

"You could say, 'No, Kari, you're not a common wench and I'll go tell Balder that Serana is not what she seems and Kari was right.' That would be a good thing to say."

"Hahaha, you are a funny maiden." He leaned forward; clapping her shoulder and making her jostle to the side several steps from the force. "Strange, but a funny maiden."

"I'm serious, Thor." She made a garbled noise, clenching her fists as she stared upwards in the hope of beseeching some sort of deity to help her out. "Come on, you like helping damsels in distress and all that. Go make Balder not mad at me anymore." Looking down again, locking eyes with the head scratching bimbo as her body visibly relaxed, she tried pleading nicely with him. "Please. Pretty please with sugar on top."

"Very well." He sighed, looking very put upon as he wriggled out of her puppy dog stare. "But I do this not for you. For my brother's honor and my friend Balder's sake. Neither deserves to be made out such fools."

"Whatever." Kari chuckled, flinging her arms around his shoulders in order to pull him down for a grateful kiss on the cheek. "Thank you, Thor."


	43. Chapter 43: Kick a man when he's down

It was not a good morning, her head buzzed angrily still fogged with honey mead and upon exiting her room, Kari was forced to tiptoe over several naked bodies snoring painfully loud. She paused half way towards the door in order to toss a pillow at her grandfather, effectively covering his nudity and tried her best to blot out the rest; that she could only assume was an orgy from the night before and most likely the reason she had been drinking. Why oh why was she not blessed to be as much a man's lady as her grandfather was a ladies man? The genetics must be stored in her DNA somewhere.

By the time she had reached the kitchens, stocked up on a large hangover cure breakfast and began setting up the dining hall with the other asgardian waitresses, life had not decided enough startling shocks for the day had already occurred. Serana was still around, Balder looking pensive along the table but not seated besides her. Instead, the harlot was sitting in what had been Kari's usual place besides Thor.

She almost dropped a platter of pork chops at the scene, bimbo and bimboob being lovey dovey with one another was enough to make her unhappy post-drinking stomach lose its iron lining. Making a quick pit stop at a bathroom, Kari purged her system and took the chance to splash cold water on her face to bring some sort of reddish life back to her pale complexion. She really was looking like shit; no wonder nobody looked at her twice and how the heck was that tart getting with so many men at once? Serana was just with Thor's brother and he had no scruples about stealing her from not only Loki but Balder too? Then again, it is not hard to steal what throws itself willingly at anything that breathes. Maybe she should try throwing herself at someone; lord knows she needed a good hard seeing too by anyone with a pulse. All right, maybe not anyone, she could never live down sleeping with some… one.

Still, Kari Motter needed to get her diva back and fast. What was the point in all this feeling sorry for herself, ignoring the fun of a bit of dress up and not using the seventeen year old body she just got back? Later though, she had work to do and then Fandral wanted to have a spar after lunch. No point in getting all nice looking when she was about to get sweaty.

Loki was still missing in action, which was a good thing really as she had no intention of going anywhere near the library for the next few days. All the studying was making her brain hurt and the disappointment of not getting anywhere since the trickster had stopped actually showing her how to do anything was making her feel rather horrid. Maybe now his lady friend was with someone else they could get back to productive classes but no doubt he would be in a nasty mood when he got back and discovered the betrayal. Better to keep out of his way for as long as possible.

Passing Prue in the corridor on her way towards the training yard had been very uncomfortable and awkward. The redhead was as big as a house, grumpy and tired to boot. Kari had never been at ease around heavily pregnant women, not since an incident had occurred back when she first started working as a waitress – an occurrence that prompted all the first aid training in the restaurant. A loud-mouthed sixteen-year-old going into labor late on a Monday night was like a nightmare come true. Sure an ambulance had arrived on the scene within the hour but it was a long enough wait to scar an impressionable young woman for life. At least she never missed taking the contraceptive pill afterwards ever again; it had been an informative incentive.

As soon as Prue was done having a good long complaining session about Egill, Egill's mother and Egill's pending offspring, she thankfully had somewhere else to get to and allowed Kari to finally leave. Fandral was already in full swing when she arrived in the training yard; both he and Balder going at it like two old pro's venting out some manly angst or something. It gave her a chance to watch a pretty good live-action demonstration whilst tightening on her sword belt and pulling her hair back into something less in the way and messy.

Starting off, she began stretching her body out before leading into a now memorized practice routine with sword drawn. Balder was not doing well, his stance showing signs of weakness, flaws in his defense as Fandral scored yet another point against him. Not wishing to relent the two began again, Fandral's agile thrusts knocked back several time but ultimately a new fault opening up in Balder's counters until this time he lost his main weapon becoming disarmed in a swirling sweep. Fandral sighed as the other warrior went to retrieve his blade, hoping to continue but the moustache-preening blonde had other ideas.

"Kari, my dear."

"Yup?" She answered; not taking her eyes off her sword as she maintained her concentration.

"Come into the sparring square, you shall spar with Balder the brave this day." Her grandfather indicated for her to take his place as Balder looked somewhat hurt.

"Eh?" Well this was new. "He'll just thrash me like he normally does."

"It will raise his spirits to win a bout." Fandral whispered in her ear as he pushed her to stand in front of the less than pleased warrior. "Keep that elbow up."

"I am, I am! Ugh…" She groaned, getting into a ready stance as Balder mimicked the same fixing her with an intimidating stare. "I don't know why you're so mad." She glared back at him, Balder answering her words with a quick succession of attacks forcing her to take a step back and then several more to the side to dodge. "Really, was that i-" She gasped as he arced his blade around very nearly cutting off her head if it had not been for her ducking skills. "Balder, the hell?"

"Elbow Kari!" Fandral called just in time to distract her away from the flutter of curly hair that was floating downwards from being cut and reminded her to strengthen her elbow in time to block Balder's next swing.

Grunting with the effort of pushing back against his might, she found herself being forced downwards onto her knees against his superior strength. The only way out was to drop her guard and roll between his legs using the only advantage she had - speed and smallness. He faltered, losing his balance from the sudden lack of counter force just long enough for her to regain her footing and prepare to defend his next turn and combo of attacks. Balder was vicious today but clumsy and several times she thought he might actually kill her. Why Fandral was not stopping the obviously dangerous spar was beyond her but perhaps he thought her capable enough to handle it or still believed his friend incapable of causing harm.

Parrying another swing, she spotted an opening and kicked the warrior as hard as she could behind his left knee. He dropped into a kneeling position giving her a chance to jump back and catch her breath, which was now ragged and burning her lungs.

"What's got into you?" She raised her elbow with the roll of her eyes as Fandral shouted about it again but kept her focus on glaring at Balder. "I'm a beginner remember, you're being really kind of fucking mean here and-"

What had just happened? Her elbow had been up had it not? Why was her head ringing? There was a really weird metallic taste in her mouth as she blinked at something shiny in front of her eyes with clouds above it. Oh, she was on the floor, it definitely felt like stones pressing into her back. She blinked again as Balder's form loomed over her eclipsing the sunshine and wiped a trickle of blood from her mouth with the back of her hand.

"You're a complete bastard, you know that right?" She flicked a splatter of blood at his clothing as he took a steadying breath. "But I suppose it's alright to knock around beginners as long as they're lying common wenches lacking in character or whatever."

"I yield!" Balder announced, sheathing his sword as he walked away rather than argue and fight.

Kari sat up, feeling a slight bruise appearing on her cheek from where she had no doubt been pimp slapped by her sparring partner. Thankfully most of the damage had occurred on the inside where her teeth had torn the flesh though the blood was rather gruesome. Fandral appeared, offering her his arm to hoist her back onto her feet, which she accepted gladly and tried to straighten her clothing.

"Why did you throw me in with him?" She asked, shaking her head to clear some of the continued ringing. "He was trying to kill me."

"I have my doubts as to that, my dear." He sighed handing back her sword that had been knocked out of her grip during the final blows. "It was a good match, you are not so much the beginner you claim."

"I lost."

"If you had not been verbally provocative the entire bout you would have won."

"Oh really now?"

"Yes." He cut her short from working her mouth up into being verbally provocative with him as well. "You did very well to exploit his weaknesses and hold your own when your mouth was closed. Why you wished to lose for the sake of petty arguing I know not."

"He was rude to me yesterday."

"And has he not been suffering for that and more since then?"

"Well…" She looked off to the side, recalling how broody Balder had been over breakfast with Serana and Thor canoodling mere feet away. "He hasn't apologized to me for what he said."

"Do you deserve it when you act so cruel?"

"I am not…" She was shocked, outraged and unsure how to back chat a certain degree of truth. "Granddad!"

"I am tired for today." Fandral smiled at his victory feigning a little fatigue. "I will see you tonight, perhaps."

Frowning, she watched her grandfather disappear from sight leaving her alone in the training yard with a sword and her thoughts for company. Folding her arms, she tutted loudly kicking a stone into several bounces across the ground and paced in an aggravated circle. Everybody else being at fault made her feel better, because at least then she was not the one that was wrong. Balder had called her names, questioned her character and refused to believe her for a stupid woman. Then he got dumped before anything got started for his friend, Thor, and had to sit through the woman he wanted laughing and cuddling with another man. Well she knew that pain, she had wanted him and he dissed her for a harlot.

All right fine, maybe they were both upset about the same thing with different people. He called her names in a moment of lunacy and she called him names a lot more when she knew he was feeling pretty low already. Maybe she was the bigger bitch.

"Aw, fuck." Kari growled as she kicked another stone sending it hurtling across the yard towards the stables.


	44. Chapter 44: Sorry

Why was she here? What was the point in doing it now other than to get it over with sooner rather than later; like ripping a plaster from the skin in one swift motion. Taking a deep steadying breath she knocked daintily on the door in a series of three and waited to be answered. Her hands had worked there way under her arms, hidden between her armpits and held in by the squeezing of her joints as she watched the floor. She could see shadows moving under the door, hear footsteps and finally a confused silence as the occupant came face to face with a pensive Karian Motter.

"Can we talk?" Her head tilted upwards but her eyes did not quite meet his.

"If you must speak." Balder sighed taking a step inward to allow her room to enter.

She nodded, brushing past him on the balls of her feet with her arms still folded tightly about her as if cold. His place was really kind of nice, she had to admit, not all gaudy and everything gold as seemed the custom. It was homely, a lot of heavy woods with etched designs and practical items. Actually, it was basically an interior designers representation of Balder right down to his purple pastel colour scheme.

"Nice place you got." She tried a little small talk as he shut the door and joined her closer to the centre of the main room.

"Thank you." He gave a slow survey of the area as if assuring himself of her words. "I have crafted many of these pieces during peaceful times."

"Oh, are there many of those?"

"I have not yet completed the dining set."

Caught off guard by his straight faced sense of humor - or so she hoped – colliding with her high-strung nerves, Kari chuckled letting her arms unfold as she visibly relaxed. It made it easier to say what she came to say, especially when she peeked a glimpse of the warrior's slight smile before he turned away to sit.

"I uh… came because I wanted to apologise for… um… alright let me start that again." She was rubbing the back of her neck, Balder watching her from his seat giving them the odd appearance of a director auditioning an actor for the lead role. "I get kind of mean when I'm upset with people. And you kind of upset me yesterday but that's not what I came to talk about so… argh… let me start again… again." Balder stayed where he was, expression of curious neutrality in tact just waiting to see where this was leading. "What I meant to say is, I'm sorry about bitching when we were sparring, I didn't mean it… well I didn't mean it that much. Like I said I just get kind of mean when I'm upset. It's a horrible personality trait. So… yeah… sorry for that. I know you're not that much of a ba- Oh god I'm doing it again. No, you're not a bastard, not unless your parents aren't married which I don't know about and is really kind of uh… I mean, I'm illegitimate too so… ugh… Can I start again?"

"Thor is right, you are very brave." Balder smiled, not unkindly.

"Huh?"

"Lacking in clarity of your own mind but pioneering forward, admitting when you are wrong, apologizing when the other is not entirely in the right and able to speak your mind when in the grasps of fear."

"Um? I think you mean stubborn stupidity there, Balder." She shook her head, brow knitted to form a look of disbelief. "I've got plenty of that."

"Bravery is to overcome our weaknesses and stand strong against what we know is wrong."

"Yeah… uh… so… apology accepted or is this going to be some mushy speech about how I'm more than I think I am and should stop acting like a child and go do something productive with my life because I've heard all that before in high school during detention and all I amounted to was a waitress with a cat that ran off with a queen and way to many drunken flashbacks of things that can never be unseen."

"I was only commenting on Thor's assessment." He raised a placating hand to calm his irate sounding guest.

"Good."

Well this was awkward, even Balder looked uncomfortable as he surveyed the room for the second time. Had she been picking fights again? Probably; listening to her words on mental playback it did sound kind of like meanness. She really needed to stop doing that.

"You have apologized to I and I must apologise to you for my behaviour yesterday." He was looking at her again, quite intently. "My words were unkind and incorrect."

"Yeah well… I was also being kind of mean then too. Serana drives me crazy…" She trailed off, frowning at the thought of the blonde boob monster. "But… what- why do you guys always go off with girls like her anyway?"

"I do not understand."

"Serana throws herself at you, Loki, Thor, Granddad and you all instantly fall head over heels and dance off under the moonlight with her." She paused, shaking her head to work away the jumble of thoughts entangling in her mind. "What the hell?"

"I can not speak for the others. I know not their consciousness." Balder straightened, and then readjusted his seated position clearly uncomfortable with his own line of thinking. "Serana reminded I of another."

"Another?" This peeked her interest.

"I do not wish to speak of it."

"Oh." He had been in love before, it was plain to see written all over his face now she took the time to study the darker circles under his eyes. "Well that's… hm." She slumped into the seat next to him, relieved in a sense that she had not actually been rejected for Serana but instead for a love interest from long ago. "I like you, you know."

"I know."

"No, I liiiiiike you."

"I know." He chuckled. "Your intentions have been clear for all to see. The pretense surrounding stance positioning did confuse at first, though your elbow-"

"I know, I know, keep it up." Kari rolled her eyes at the mantra of abuse about her weak elbow and all its dangling ways. "Me and my elbow have heard enough back chat about how we like to be casual. I can't help it. Have you ever tried to carry four plates or two platters with strong elbows? It's not possible, you need to give it a little droop and bend to get the balance right or you'll end up with cracked china all over the place." She demonstrated the waitress-carrying pose, picking up several objects on a table in front of her to balance along her arms. "See. My elbow knows exactly what it's doing outside the training yard, it's just inside that we get confused."

"I knew not there was skill involved in serving."

"Hunny, you have no idea." She laughed; carefully replacing all the things she took from the table back into their original spots. "Come do this job for the night and you'll never complain about war ever again."

"You exaggerate."

"Two words… children's parties. It's like simultaneously taking on the fiends of hell and being tortured as a prisoner of war."

"You have never been to Hel." He was angry.

"You've never done a children's party."

"Let us agree to disagree." He waved off the subject hoping for a truce instead of further arguing.

"And here I thought we were getting on again. Oh, you are aggravating."

"Your countenance is becoming unattractive once more."

"Well, if there is a position left for God of Melancholy be sure to tell whoever's in charge of that business I'm a good candidate."

"It would not suit." Balder leaned back in order to enjoy the hilarity of her words more fully.

"Oh I don't know about that. I swear Fandral has started getting wrinkles from the amount of misery I've given him. You've not been best pleased with me either."

"I am amused now."

"Yes well," she relaxed back into the seat besides him tired of straining her neck to keep him in her focus. "You'll be miserable again in a bit when I say something else stupid." Shaking her head, she almost laughed aloud as he frowned looking away with a serious expression etched into his features. "There, I've already done it."

"Do not…" He turned sharply, almost colliding with her before trailing off with a snort of defeat. "It is I that causes myself distress not you, Kari Fandralkin."

"Really?" She sounded skeptical but in a very preoccupied manner.

The warmth of his breath was mingling with her own; it was incredibly distracting especially when given the adorning bow that was the intensity within his eyes. It was tempting to reach forward, touch him in some manner, any manner. Was this the teenage hormones talking? How long was she staring at him? Time was beginning to feel abstracted from its correct pace. She felt terrified but he thought she was brave. Oh, who was she kidding, Kari Motter was the biggest idiot she knew and she knew a lot of people – the exception being Serana but she was too stupid to think of that bimbo at the time.

She bit her lip, he looked about to say something but he never was going to get to finish that sentence. What had she just done? Right, threw herself at Balder the brave and kissed him. At least he was not fighting back but she did not dare open her eyes in case he was staring at her with a dumbfounded shocked look.


	45. Chapter 45: Really, really good friends

Trailing fingers back and forth across her lips, Kari was lost in a bit of a daydream just thinking about what had happened the afternoon before. Her mouth still tingled from the kiss awkwardly begun but eagerly embraced there after. A bit of a make-out session with Balder the brave had certainly been nice, however, a certain set of mixed recollections had oddly disrupted the moment.

When the kiss had deepened, cheeks flushed and heated, braver hands beginning to roam, why had she been unable to stop thinking? Every thought like a ping-pong match between what was occurring and a detail analysis of how it compared to another's kiss. Loki had definitely tasted better, gave it a dominating fierceness that made her skin prickle at just the remembrance. Balder was softer, tender and reassuring without ever imposing anything further. It was the difference between safe and dangerous. She did not need dangerous. No, but she certainly liked it in an infuriating manner.

"Fuck!" She spun in a circle, kicking her leg out at knee length blades of grass scoring very little damage.

"Kari!"

"What?" she whirled around again, annoyed at being shouted at by midget asgardians only to watch a ball whiz past her right cheek.

"Ever since you got old-"

"Shut up Dagur!" Kari yelled back, flinging the ball she had now collected right at the little nuisance despite his position on the rounder's field being the incorrect one to send to.

"Make me witch!" Dagur was up for a showdown but deterred by the other children starting to get irate at the pair fighting instead of playing again. "Let us just kick her from the team, Garthar?"

"Kari play's this game better than you, Dagur." Garthar shrugged off the request much to a pair of swooning girls giggles; he was really starting to become the pre-teen ladies man on the fields.

"That is only because she taught us how to play." Dagur groaned, throwing the ball back to the pitcher for the next round of play. "Stop daydreaming and catch, Kari!"

"If you stop bothering me, Dagur." Kari stuck her tongue out at the young boy making him grimace in disgust.

Now, what had she been thinking about again before rudely interrupted by flying balls and Dagur? Right, Balder and kissing yesterday.

"Here you are. I should have thought you learning in the library but it seems I was mistaken and children's games now your point of study. I must say, despite its lower intellectual merit you even manage unsuccessfully at this endeavor. An impressive achievement of failure."

"Hello Loki." Kari rolled her eyes at the looming god of mischief now bothering her.

"Kari!" An angry boy shrilled as the ball whizzed past her cheek yet again.

"It was not my fault this time!" She huffed, jogging to retrieve the ball further along the field where it had landed. "Loki distracted me!"

"Loki?" Dagur was smirking, in a manner evocative of Loki in a plotting mood, and folded his arms revving up for another round of childish arguments. "Your imaginary friend?"

"What? He's standing right here!" She pointed out the shrugging prince looking thoughtful and quizzical about his apparent invisibility.

"There is no one standing there, Kari." Even Garthar was starting to worry about her sanity now.

"The old witch has gone mad." Dagur laughed.

"I swear Dagur I am going to turn you into a toad and leave you like that forever!"

"Will not! I bet you cannot even do that! Besides, my mother wou-"

"Be very happy never to have to deal with your bloated whining face anymore."

Oh it was on now, Dagur looked about ready to rip her hair out and use it as eye lashes. It would have been a fun little brawl, with both their natural strengths about equal, if not for Garthar running between them like a well-practiced referee.

"If Kari says Loki is standing there, then he is standing there." Garthar declared, pushing Dagur back a step whilst Kari up turned her nose at the boy with her thumb. "I believe her."

"Thanks Garthar." She gave him a pat on the shoulder as Loki appeared besides them startling her for a moment.

"Only reason you believe her, Garthar, is because you like kissing her."

"Have you really been kissing a minor?" Loki raised an eyebrow, tilting his head from side to side to survey the dirty blonde twelve year old she was suspected of possibly molesting.

"What? No! It was one time and he surprised me!" Kari flailed around, cheeks red from the accusation. "When I was eleven!"

"What?" Garthar was frowning up at her now.

"It's true!" Dagur crowed, receiving multiple 'oohs' from the rest of the children. "I knew it!"

"Yes, it is true, I am going to marry her but that does not change the fact you are wrong, Dagur."

"Marriage?" Oh Loki loved this, his grin was as big as Dagur's, which momentarily distracted her to think whether or not she had ever actually met Dagur's father before.

"Oh god… why me?" She palmed her face, massaging her temples briefly before crouching a little to be on the same eye line as her intended. "Garthar…" She paused for a deep breath, the boy staring at her proud and intently. "Look, I don't know where you got this engagement idea from but…"

"You do not want to be really, really, really good friends anymore?" He answered with a steady voice.

"No I… uh… Sweetie, I'm way too old for you."

"But I gave you my word." He was resolute.

"The old witch is eating Garthar's heart." Dagur cackled, sticking his face in between the two to have a good gawp.

"Seriously Dagur just…" She huffed, angry and aggravated conjuring a spell and flinging it at the now scarpering boy. "Oh… that wasn't supposed to… Hehehe."

"Ah!" Dagur tripped then began feeling up his clothes that had somehow turned to wax. "My clothes are breaking?"

"Garthar?" Kari turned back to the boy, finding him missing and stood to get a better viewing vantage. "Garthar!" She spotted him, running off up the hill through the grass and made to go after only to be pulled back by a firm grip on her arm. "Hey let go of me!"

"Leave him, he will be over you by evening meal." The god of mischief sighed, dragging her much to the remaining children's confusion as it appeared she was faking her own kidnapping via invisible man. "And I see you are quite in need of further tutorage. Was that abomination supposed to be a transfiguration enchantment?

"Leave off, not as if you've been helpful for a long time what with your girlfriend. Oh right I forgot, your ex-girlfriend that ran off with Thor." She suddenly found her self unceremoniously dropped. "Ow."

"Has he now?" Loki was possibly annoyed, hungry or plotting; all three expressions looked the same to her from the ground. "Library, now, Karian Motter."

"Yes, sir." She gave him a mock salute and got back to her feet as he disappeared. "I need to learn to do that."

With a shake of her head, Kari began the walk back to the palace enjoying the sunshine along the way. It was going to be a rough time around Loki and Thor until they resolved this matter between them and on that note she slowed her pace further to draw out the length of her journey. The less time spent in the library around moody old Loki the better.

The walk also gave her a chance to think further on her rudely interrupted daydreaming. Now that she had actually seen Loki, after his brief but peaceful absence, the entire worrying about his kissing skills compared with Balder seemed ridiculous. She hated him. Next time, there would be no resistance or holding back if Balder wanted to make-out some more; though he seemed more interested in being less smoochy and more courting if she had heard his speech yesterday rightly. When would she ever get laid?


	46. Chapter 46: Canape

What a mess. Well, it had been really quiet in the library as she waited for Loki to return, which he did not. After flicking through the 'romance' section as she had renamed it – discovering several saucy 'historical documents' on asgardian love pairings amongst some dribble about magic swords and yearly mining reports – for four dull hours she had to return to the kitchens for her evening shift. That is when the chaos had been discovered.

According to one of the maids, Loki had stormed in, accused Thor of misdeeds and the pair got into a very heated argument involving weapons, destruction of property and a guard getting set on fire. She really had missed a good show if all the disarray was anything to go by. The corridors all the way from an observation room, through the dining hall and straight to the throne room were in a very poor state with tapestries even hanging on their last threads.

Of course, who would be left to clean up all the vandalism? The staff and Kari whilst the wayward princes got a slap on the wrist from their father in the throne room. Oh to be royalty and accidentally born into a high position.

Neither of the two brothers were at dinner that night. Serana spent most of her time crying on Fandral's shoulder, much to Kari's disgust, as she knew very well who would be staying over tonight. Maybe she could stay with someone else? Prue? No way, that woman looked about ready to blow in more than one manner. Balder perhaps? He was smiling at her across the room in a very come hither style, or perhaps that was just her pent up hormones making something naughty out of what was purely innocent. A bit of corruption might do him good though, it sure as hell would make her feel better and get away from Serana copulating with her grandfather.

"Ewww." She grimaced at the thought pouring a hairy drunk warrior, reduced to grunting, another glass of wine.

How to seduce Balder was now the question. She could not just go up to him now, he was out of her work zone and after dinner, when he and the others left, she would be stuck behind clearing up for at least another three quarters of an hour. Maybe Serana and Fandral would be done by then and she could sleep in peace. Who was she kidding, her grandfather would be at it all night with a ridiculous amount of stamina he got from who knew where. Had to make her wonder, were all asgardian men as virile?

Screw it, she would just got to Balder's place, knock on his door and keep him awake until even he could not take it anymore and took her hard on the floor if needs be. First, pits stop to freshen up in the communal bathroom and sort out her ridiculously poofy hair. She was looking kind of tired when she saw herself in the mirror, even in a seventeen-year-old body fatigue showed and it was rather late. Slapping her face several times had certainly awoken her somewhat, adding blush to her cheeks as she spotted a bottle of perfume someone had left out on the counter. They would not mind, surely and it would definitely help the wooing process.

Tidier, brighter and smelling nicer, Kari made her way out into the palace now pretty deserted with the vast majority of people away to bed. She giggled as she skipped through the corridors unabashed and unreprimanded. It was almost like having the place to herself, her own palace in her own kingdom where she was princ-

No, no, no, he had to ruin it.

"Loki." She huffed, caught in the act and held to the spot by the god of mischief and his foreboding green eyes.

"A vast quantity of vigor for so late an hour, Motter." He leaned back, a hand reaching his chin to fuss and increase his cognitive assimilation of her appearance. "And how rude of me not to appear for our earlier appointment."

"I heard you were quite busy." She rolled her eyes, staring at a hideous vase to her right in order to escape his scrutinizing gaze.

"Indeed, I was quite overcome with a more pressing matter but seeing as you are here now, and so bright eyed and bushy tailed, let us make up for your lack of knowledge immediately."

"What? No… no… " She raised both hands in front of her chest with the shake of her head to assure him of her negative resolve. "I'm really tired and stuff to do in the morning you know… well maybe you don't know but some people have to get up in the morning to work."

"You accuse me of idleness and lacking purpose?" He was either amused or incensed.

"No I… it's just you know… you're a prince and all that so you don't have to get up if you don't want to."

"A prince of asgard is burdened from the moment of his conception with great purpose." Definitely incensed.

"Oh just leave me alone Loki!" Kari grumbled, scowling and pouting with a dash of exasperation. "Seriously, just, go away and be burdened by your great purpose somewhere I am not. I'm exhausted and I am not in the mood for whatever this stupid game is. I'm sick and tired of all the goddamn backhanded insults, physical stuff and drama whenever you come near me! Just back off and stop provoking me!"

"I provoke you?" He laughed.

"Yes, yes you do." She stated in all seriousness. "And you damn well know you do."

"Karian Motter, innocent and begrudged by all. Persecuted at no fault of her own."

"I am about this far," she took a step closer till they were almost chest to forehead – why was he so tall? – and held her fore finger and thumb an inch apart, "from poking your eyes out with an icicle."

"I would like to see you try."

"So would I."

All the glaring between them was really starting to give her a headache. It was a relief when Loki actually started laughing, dragging her into a fit of amusement with him as they both took stock of the scene they were players in. This was so stupid and tense; the dam had to break into lunacy and hilarity at some point.

"Come, I will walk you back to your room." The prince offered, holding his arm out for her too take in his best charming manner.

"Uh… noooo I'm not heading that way, Fandral is entertaining uh…" Don't say Serana. "A lady friend."

"I thought this an unusual route for you." He relaxed once more thought his eyes were now twinkling with on coming trouble.

"Yeah so I'm just gonna-"

"I will escort you nonetheless, the palace is dangerous at night. Who knows what monsters lurk the corridors. Giant spiders even."

"Or Gods of mischief." She sidestepped his second attempt at arm offering.

"There is only one of those and he you do not need to fear when at my side." Wait, was he flirting with her?

"Right but still I'd rather just… it's… a private matter so… shoo?"

"I do recall now, is this not the way to Balder's accommodation?" He queried as if not hearing or seeing her general shooing motions.

"Maybe it is." No he was not flirting, just biding his time to embarrass her with what he knew.

"Then I certainly must act as your guardian. A young lady alone, so late at night heading towards a strange man's abode."

"You are far stranger than he is." She took another step back as he came forward keeping him at a safe distance just out of arms reach. "Look just… fine I'm going home instead. Is that better? Will you leave me be now?"

"And what of your grandfather and his 'friend'?" He tilted his head to the side, his expression all concern but she knew better by now to believe his lame acting skills.

"I'm sure I can wedge some pillows over my ears as usual."

"That cannot be comfortable. You shall just have to return to my rooms with myself."

"Uh… no?" She sounded skeptical but not because she wanted to go with him, because she did not, but purely because this was getting really weird now.

"I could order you to come back with me." Loki Smirked. "It is a perk of being a prince burdened with such power and responsibilities."

"I am not a whore!" How dare he insinuate such a thing; she was furious.

"Strange, you smell just like one of the courtesans." He leaned in, smelling the trail of perfume between the curve of her neck.

Kari was shocked, wide-eyed and shaken by his action. Taking a swift step to the side her hand rocketed upwards slapping him clean across the cheek and causing his head to snap to the left at the unadulterated force. Was she really wearing some sort of prostitutes signature scent? She hardly had time to think about it further as he straightened himself, rubbing the side of his cheek checking for damage as he cast his gaze along the corridor.

"I deserved that, this time." He commented wryly.

She was still shaking, despite the knowledge he was not going to retaliate to the strike, her breath horrendous and loud in her ears. This stupid effect he had on her, she hated it, she hated him and she hated herself for all of the aforementioned. To top it off her eyes were now blurry, water welling up, pending to burst into tears at any second. Wiping the excess fluid away, furiously, she turned around so he would not see she was so close to tears.

"Forgive me."

His words caught her attention like a hot poker to the brain. Turning about she stared at him disbelieving. Had he just apologized to her? Genuinely? It sounded genuine but this was the god of lies after all. Who knew what she could believe.

"You have slept in my rooms before, my canapé is yours if you wish it for the night." He continued, finally locking eyes with her once more. "You have my vow I will not touch you."

"Difficult to trust you on that when you sniffed me and spoke about ordering me to your rooms for smelling like a prostitute, in your opinion, oh and that whole… prank, when you turned up as Heimdall to my room?" She could fill the fire in the pit of her stomach stoking into a full blaze. "How far exactly were you planning on going with that rouse?"

"I gave my solemn vow, as a prince of Asgard, I will not touch you in any form."

"Why what's wrong with me now?" She was confused, was he insulting her because he deemed her unworthy of sleeping with the likes of him or was this some weird chivalry from the prick that slapped her back when she first met him.

"Motter, sleep on my canapé or go back to Fandral. I can offer no more."

They were both aggravated and disgruntled by the turn of the conversation. No matter the dialogue it always led to insults, distrust and petty bickering between them like a precision missile. Still, she really kind of did need somewhere to sleep. Balder was no doubt too far-gone to awaken without upsetting him and she really did not want to have to walk over Fandral and Serena in the throws of passion or even just hear them.

"Why do you keep saying canapé?" It seemed like a perfectly reasonable question to ask. "I'm not sleeping on a cracker with cheese on it."

"Kari-" Loki paused to enjoy a good hearty chuckle at her misunderstanding. "Your simplicity amuses me greatly."

"Dick."


	47. Chapter 47: Dragon and a dragonfly

It may just be a sofa, but by god was it comfortable to sleep on, even more so than her bed with the amount of cushions she got to cuddle up to. Loki had given his word and all that but it still had not quelled her nerves about him getting touchy feely during the night and so she had remained in all her clothing including her jeans just in case an escape was needed. Still, she slept without interruption all night only awakening when a waft of strange smells assaulted her nose.

Laying on her side, half dangling off the 'canapé' as he called it – whatever he said canapé's in her opinion would forever be little munchables for posh people – she breathed in the aroma of soapy things. It was not anything she needed to worry about, eyes remaining firmly closed as she tried to drift back to sleep only to be further disturbed by a damp padding sound. She stiffened as the footsteps grew closer, preparing herself mentally to go on the offence if surprised but no danger arose.

He had stopped moving forward though she could definitely make out an odd sound of friction taking place. She kept her features relaxed, not wanting to give away that she was awake and partially observing him when he now seemed to pause his final task. What was he up to? Why was he standing so close? He was not admiring her whilst she slept was he? That would be on the seriously creepy side.

Attentions wandering she was not prepared for what happened next. Covers were wrenched from her in a single swift motion, cruelly bathing her in the morning chill of the room which made her involuntarily shiver and the final blow being something horribly wet dropping onto her head. Kari made a disgusted sort of shocked noise, a tangle of limbs waving around uselessly as she rolled off the side of the sofa landing awkwardly and pulled the towel off her face.

"I hope you slept well." Loki chuckled as he loomed above her in nothing but a second towel wrapped about his waist.

"Loki! Go… put some clothes on I can almost see your junk from down here." Kari demanded appalled at the thought of what she might see as she used the wet towel in her hands as a makeshift wall between them. "If I'd known you'd be a dick and wake me up like this…"

"Karian Motter," he bent down and snatched his towel back from her, "I would not be so cruel to a guest sharing my humble accommodation. But," he paused to begin drying his hair, as she got back onto her feet suddenly aware of what that odd friction noise had been, "you and I were both aware of your consciousness."

"Oh really now?"

"Yes." He shrugged. "When your thunderous snoring finally ceased one had to assume you had awakened."

"I… I do not snore."

"Ear piercingly." He twiddled an index finger inside his ear to relieve a clog of moisture. "You talk in your sleep as well."

"What?" Kari flushed; what had he heard her saying?

"'Oh Balder, how I have longed for this moment.'" Loki made a poor interpretation of her higher pitched voice with added eyelash fluttering for increased annoying effect.

"Ah-hah! Now I know you're lying! I was not having a dream about Balder last night." The bastard was bluffing.

"But you do have them quite regularly, I take it?" He inquired draping his wet towel over his shoulder now he was done drying his hair.

"I… what… no… no…" This was a mind game; he was just teasing her about the Balder thing last night because he was feeling all shunned and sad about Serana no doubt. "What's it matter to you anyway?"

"Very little I am afraid." He laughed whipping the towel about his waist off and over his opposite shoulder as he turned.

She stared after him, firstly in shock at his nudity, secondly in admiration of his spank able butt cheeks and lastly out of sheer stubbornness not to be caught forced into looking away via embarrassment. He had no power over her. Not even when he looked over his shoulder now standing in his bedroom and gave her a quizzical glance.

"Am I too be gawked at?" He asked casually as he tossed his towels further into the room where she could not see.

"You're to be observed until found not to be up to something." Kari frowned making sure to keep her eyes glued on his disorderly hair.

"I do not think you will live long enough to see that day." His smile was so wide she thought his jaw might snap right off as he disappeared from view only to return a moment later holding up two outfits on separate hangers. "Which do you think? The green one or the black one?"

"Green." She answered immediately, holding his gaze fiercely as he fully faced her in all his glory now.

"Black it is."

"You're such a-" Best not to say the 'd' word whilst a man is on display. "I'm going I have work. Try not to have too much fun today."

"Impossible when you are around." He sighed turning his back on her as she went to leave.

"I must say," she paused at the door, hand on the knob and grinned wickedly at the thoughts running through her mind, "I'm actually really rather surprised you and Thor are brothers."

"Oh?" He was distracted and disinterested with this diversion now he was doing up his trousers.

"You're both just so… different without your clothes on." She tilted her head to the side giving him a strange quizzical run down as he frowned at her. "It's like the difference between a dragon and a dragonfly." His jaw audibly clicked shut, from whatever comeback he was about to mount; just the right time to make an exit whilst the silver tongued prince was stricken dumb. "Bye."

Waving her farewell, Kari strolled from the god of mischief's rooms and waited till she was a little further down the corridor before bursting out into a hearty round of laughter. Oh that was too good to be true. He looked so deflated, caught off guard and utterly speechless. Maybe all these verbal fights were starting to payoff if she had finally out witted the king of back handed comments. Now all she needed was a quick change of clothes and…

"Shit I'm late." She squealed running full pelt back to Fandral's place.

Really, why had she thought teasing Loki through comparison to his brother was a good idea? Because, it was not a good idea. Though it was a good idea in one respect; he was no longer speaking to her. On the other hand he was no longer teaching her, allowing her in the library and had been spreading malicious rumors about her lack of virtue. At least she had to assume it was he spreading the lies because it was sort of in his job description as God of mischief and lies and who else would do it?

By her current count, according to gossip she was over hearing never said to her face, Karian Motter, you know, Fandral the dashing's granddaughter, was in the possession of seven simultaneous lovers. She also had relations with Sleipnir, which accounted for Ryder standing outside the stable staring at her whilst she practiced in the training yard and was engaged to two young boys. Well, partly, that last bit had sort of been true in the mind of a twelve year old that really had forgotten about her and now had a really, really, really good friend his own age with adorable freckles and a love of squashed daisies picked from the path.

Balder was acting somewhat hesitant around her, twitching as if very uncomfortable in her presence and unable to ask her what he seemingly yearned to. The thought had cross her mind to just out right tell him he was hearing bullshit but the overall internal debate had favored not saying a word. If he was so shallow to believe just outrageousness about her, ignore what he knew, then maybe he did not deserve to squeeze her nipples and have her scream his name. Seven simultaneous lovers though, no wonder she was so tired lately, just thinking about keeping a harem happy was exhausting.

"Granddad?" Kari leaned across her chair, rather than sitting in it the correct way, balancing a half filled cup of wine on her forehead.

"Yes, my dear?" Fandral was busy polishing his sword by the fire.

"What kind of contraception is around in asgard?" She blinked as a little wine spilled from her cup, catching the tittering container back into the safety of her hand as Fandral paused his ministrations and gave her an almost horrified look. "Oh not you too. It's lies, all lies. Loki's just mad because I said something that did not flatter his ego."

"Another of your lovers quarrels."

"Really? Seriously?" She sat up, taking a long draw from her wine until it was all gone with an audible swallow. "How many times do I have to tell you people? Me plus Loki equals no. Just no."

"You were seen leaving his rooms in a disheveled state recently."

"So? I just slept on his canapé sofa thing." She shrugged, sitting up to pour herself some more wine. "Wait… is that why Balder's acting weird?"

"Kari, my dear, do not tease the good and noble Balder." Fandral sighed really laying into a smudge on his blade to get it up.

"I'm not teasing him." She rolled her eyes, leaning back into her chair once more with a dangerously full cup. "I swear, on my mothers grave." He looked round at her, astonished at her words as her eyes widened realizing who she was speaking to and their relation. "Sorry, I didn't mean to… it's just a saying on earth."

"This is not midgard." Fandral sighed to release his frown.

"Earth, granddad." It was really starting to bother her the way everybody seemed to be correcting her all the time about earth being midgard. "At least meet me half way in the middle here. I've been accustoming myself to asgard for ages. This is not where I was born and raised and it's very hard to think of it as home but I'm trying so could you at least stop calling my world midgard and call it by it's proper name. Earth."

"That is what I said. Midgard."

"No, you're saying 'midgard'."

"I believe I understand our dilemma." He paused his sword polishing, holding the blade up to the firelight to check along its length for further blemishes.

"Eh?"

"Kari, I, like everyone else here, speak the all language. Everyone hears it in their native tongue."

"Nooo… you're speaking English." Kari frowned, concentrating and dubious at the same time.

"Exactly." He nodded in response, cheerful and assured she now understood perfectly.

"Fuck it, I flew through a rollercoaster portal onto a rainbow bridge where everyone is a god and gold is the main decorative theme. Why not? Anything else you want me to believe right now? Because I am good and drunk enough to let it not bother me."

"Nothing pressing."

"What? No pixies and elves?" She laughed.

"Elves live in their own realms." Fandral was up, placing his cleaning supplies away safely.

"You're so shitting me right now." This was unbelievable, enough to make her smirk at the very idea.

"I am not."

"Seriously?"

"I would not lie to you, my dear."

"Are they like Legolas?" She leaned on the edge of her seat, eager to hear the juicy details on real life elves.

"Who is this Legolas?"

"Oh granddad, we have got to get movies in asgard." Every time he became 'cool granddad' it seemed 'out of touch granddad' was not far behind to ruin things.

"Those long loud picture shows you must sit for hours quietly watching?" Fandral grimaced, obviously recalling some unpleasant experience he had on earth at some point involving a movie theatre. "It will not suit asgard."

"Shame… but anyway… contraception?"

"I know not of that subject." Her grandfather was rather uncomfortable looking as he tested the balance of his weapon. "Perhaps you should ask Sif or someone else of your gender."

"Granddad you really need to start taking as much responsibility you give that big sword of yours as your other sword." Kari sighed, rolling her eyes as she took a sip from her cup and pondered on more amusing thoughts. "Oh, could you marry Serana?"

"I would prefer not to." He chuckled.

"Awww, would be so much fun getting to call her 'grandma' in public really loudly."

"Kari, your unkindness worries me greatly at times."

"Tch, don't start on me tonight. It was just a joke." She pouted, turning her body away from him as she continued to drink her wine. "Geeze I can't even unwind around my own family. Besides, why is it when people say unkind things to me you don't get on their case?"

"Because they are not my kin and you need to stand strong for yourself."

"Oh, so this is one of those stand up and be a man things but don't do it the mean way?" She pulled a face behind his back as she spoke.

"I never asked you to be a man." Fandral ran a hand through his hair, putting his sword back into the depths of its sheath and turned to regard his granddaughter with care. "Serana has done nothing to warrant your hatred that I recall."

"That you recall." Could he make her anymore angry tonight? "You don't know half the shit I put up from her and other people."

"I care not when you are in this mood, my dear." He stated matter-of-factly.

"Ffff-" She clench her free hand into a tight fist, trying to hold in the slur of profanity wishing to escape her lips before standing suddenly. "I'm going to bed."

"That would be best." He agreed.

"No fuck it, I'm going out to have a wild orgy with my imaginary gossip harem."

"Kari…" He began but fell into instantly amused silence as all her ranting waving of arms had resulted in her cup of wine spilling over the top of her head.

"Don't laugh. Don't you dare laugh!" She glared at his ascending moustache of glee. "I'm going to have a bath and then I am going to bed."


	48. Chapter 48: Shania Twain

Fandral was out on, whatever it is her grandfather did, business with the rest of the warriors three. As usual, the explanation she got from the two merry and one grumpy band of men was a jumble of syllables and nonsense about a dragon, a maiden or a dragon that was a maiden and ale made from pine nuts. Really it was like trying to figure out what a group of university students were planning to get up to on a Friday night and casually wondering if they would return on Monday for lectures.

At least she had the place to herself and nobody to scold her for bad karaoke and weird dancing on the furniture. Sadly, her iPod's battery was not up to the task of several days near continuous play and by the afternoon of day three had to go on solar charger life support. Just what she needed on a day off, no entertainment and increasingly less people to hangout with; maybe a nap was in order. What was a girl to do alone in asgard? No use in moping around in doors all day, not when the weather was so nice and chilly outside. Wasn't Christmas or the asgardian equivalent coming up soon? She was sure she would find out sooner or later.

Rolling off the side of her chair, to escape the inescapable tangle of limbs she had gotten herself into, Kari jogged off back to her room grabbing her practice sword and some hair bands to tie her mess of curls back with. Perhaps she could find Balder alone in the training yard and get him to spend some sweaty, exertive alone time with her. That and finally beat him in a one on one spar; she was really starting to make him work for the victories now, even back at his full vigor minus emotional burden.

With a hop over the mess of dirty clothes on her floor, several skips through the palace and finally a jump down the short steps towards the training yard she found herself caught up in some rather magnificent skirmishing. Balder was indeed there, surveying the area like an angry hawk, but so was also Thor and Loki making several new impact holes in the ever-changing terrain. She did not envy whoever's job it was to keep the place tidy and organized.

"Balder?" She tapped the stoic warrior on the shoulder, having carefully made her way over to him standing at the edge of destruction like the last hope.

"Kari." He glanced at her, unwilling to take his eyes off the scene of Thor throwing himself through a fake Loki before having to defend from a rather vicious staff attack.

"Are they trying to kill each other?"

"Not this day." He shook his head. "The all father ordered his sons to spar until too exhausted to disagree. I have been watching over them since the day before yesterday."

"That explains why I haven't seen you guys around. Are they seriously not tired yet? I'd be dead after a few hours."

"Asgardian warriors do not require the same length of rest as midgardians." Balder shifted his weight to the opposite foot, arms dangling nonchalantly at his sides as he fought the desire to yawn. "A few days on the battlefield is little to us."

"Remind me never to become an asgardian warrior." She blinked several times, blowing air at a stray strand of hair to dislodge it from her sight as well as take in what she had just heard.

"I knew not you had thought on becoming a warrior."

"I haven't, it was a joke." Kari chuckled at the perplexed expression on her companions face, knocking against his arm with her shoulder playfully.

"I see." He turned his attention back to the chaos in front of them just in time to watch Loki take a fist to the gut and fly backwards several feet.

"So…" Ouch did that look painful. "What are the bonnie princes of asgard fighting about this time?"

"You do not know?"

"Nope." She shook her head with an added shrug to emphasize her ignorance.

"There was a quarrel about you."

"Eh?" Ok, that had her undivided attention. "Me?"

"Indeed." Balder nodded solemnly. "Thor requested Loki cease his spiteful rumors about your person but Loki denied any such behavior and accused his brother of…"

"Of…?" Why did she have the feeling she was not going to like this next part of the story?

"The accusation is one of sexual conduct."

"With me?" She shuddered horrified at the thought of two grown men, and brothers to boot, arguing over who had banged her in the minivan first. "Yeah right."

"Thor denied the allegation also." Balder physically relaxed relieved by her scandalized response. "However, Thor then made an accusation of his own."

"About me?" Of course about her, whom else were the boys going to throw at one another as if she were a cowpat.

"Yes."

"I take it I'm supposed to have been sleeping with Loki too?"

"Yes."

"Seriously?" She was no longer annoyed and just deeply disappointed by the repeating nature of this part of the story. "People need to stop with all that. We don't even get on. He's an annoying creepy old man."

"I am older than prince Loki." He shot her another glance, bewildered this time before distracted by a hunk of rock the size of his head bouncing to a stop just in front of them.

"Really? You look pretty fine for however old you are."

"Thank you." He blushed at her naughty grin glad for a reason to look elsewhere to hide his discomfiture.

"Hey, what you doing tonight?" She took her chance, wrapping her arm around his and leaning into his warmth.

"I plan to sleep." He answered flatly.

"Well, before that?"

"Eat?" He shifted his footing again somehow drawing her in closer about his side.

"Good." She was chewing on her lip, resting her head against his upper arm as he became highly diverted from watching the fight. "Want to come over to mine and eat?"

"Over to your's and eat?" He repeated the translation captured in her gaze.

"Yeah, Fandral's off fighting a dragon maiden with beer in its guts or something and I have the day off. So… wanna come over for dinner?"

"Alone?"

"Not if you include our shadows." She giggled.

"I do not think it would be appropriate." Balder grabbed the opportunity to break away, clearing his throat as he took to his observational task once more.

"Aw come on, I'll end up having to eat on my own listening to Shania Twain otherwise." Kari pouted, not hiding for a second the disappointment in her tone of voice.

"Could you not simply dine in the hall?"

"No, I'm not a warrior." She sighed, he was trying sure but he seriously needed to get a reality check about how different it was for the little people in the palace. "I have to be invited, usually by Thor."

"I…" He was uncomfortable, awkward and completely lost in whatever woods they had stumbled into.

"You could just reject me if you like." This was obviously going nowhere, he just seemed to be drifting further away the more she grabbed for him. "No biggy."

"No I… I will ask Thor to invite you." He was suddenly determined now she was no longer clinging to his arm.

"But… eh?" Was this a date or charity? "Someone really needs to explain the asgardian rules to me. They make no sense. I mean I thought you were kind of in to me, you didn't seem to mind when we were kissing at your place and it's only dinner not as if I'm asking you to come over and sleep with me or something."

"I never assumed it was…" Flustered Balder was certainly adorable. "Forgive me, I am tired and know not what I am saying."

"Hmmm." To late, she was already locked in a sulk, back turned to him, arms folded and busy admiring her shoes.

"Kari?" He tried softly, placing a strong hand on her shoulder to pull her back to facing him.

"Hmmm?" She peered up, mouth contorted as she pouted from one side to the other between intense lip chewing.

Their eyes were locked, the towering warrior claiming her gaze with his own fierce but gentle blue. It was her turn to flush crimson, heat filling her cheeks and belly until it felt as if a swarm of butterflies had come to life within her. Lifting his other arm, the one currently not resting on her shoulder, he pushed the loose curling strand of hair from her face brushing the side of her cheek with his finger in passing. She knew what was coming; his body on a collision course with her own but her mind had stopped computing anything beyond the need to remember that breathing was a good idea. Warm breath mingling, he certainly smelt like the days he had been standing guard but it only heightened her interest as his pheromones – the essence of man – filled her nostrils almost making her groan longingly. Her eyes fluttered shut as his skin came into contact with her own, claiming one another in a kiss as she gripped hold of his purple tunic about his chest.

"HALT!" Loki bellowed, distracting the pair like skitterish rabbits a step back from one another.

"You yield brother?" Thor queried out of breath.

"This is pointless." Was his brother's aggravated response as he dusted himself down.

"Do not beat yourself up too hard, little brother. The God of Thunder is near impossible to defeat." The bimbo laughed heartily, raising his fists to the air in victory before noting the woman standing besides Balder. "Bring us food and drink!"

"Bring it yourself, it's my day off." Kari was pretty damn angry having had her romantic moment spoiled and getting ordered around by an idiot in a cape. What was he? Five?

"Fandralkin!" Thor was suddenly happy to see her now he knew who she was.

"Kari." She groaned back.

"I know your name." He waved her off, ignoring the sheer volume of scowling she was giving him. "I see you carry a sword. Come, let us spar together. I wish to see how you have improved since last we fought. I am sure you will prove a greater challenge than my brother."

"I'd really rather-"

"Do not make your prince wait." Loki breathed shoving her forward towards the large blonde now waving a sword around with a dumb grin on his face.

"Woah, wait…" She fumbled forward, tittering closer by the force of the shove until able to reclaim her own equilibrium.

"Good, now draw." Thor was all smiles as he moved into a ready stance.

All right she could do this, it was not like last time when she hardly knew one end from the other and if things got really bad at least Balder was keeping an eye out. Deep breath, draw sword and one foot in front of the other in a strong pose. Thor nodded his approval at her footing and took the chance to show off with a fancy toss and twirl of his own blade that did not impress her much. She focused; this was going to be a battle where her speed would be of far more use than anything else. He was already tired from fighting with Loki and obviously hungry and thirsty so those factors would go in her favour too.

The prince made the first move, a thrust forward, which she side stepped followed by a sweep to the side after her head, which she easily ducked and darted to the right throwing her weight into her turn as she curved her blade diagonally to catch his now exposed arm. He stepped his foot back, partially hiding the disadvantage and bringing his own blade back to block. She had expected it, allowing their swords to collide as she weaved under lowering the tension in her grip so as to allow her blade to roll around the surface of his with ease to follow after her. He was caught out again, exposed on his other side and forced to throw himself backwards in a repeating submission. She had him on the defense but not for long as he became aware of the pattern her quick skirmishes exhibited and soon threw himself onto the offence against her.

Parry, weave, parry, duck. He had her dancing to his tune now, retreating backwards and becoming jumbled amongst the debris and pitfalls now making up the terrain of the training yard. Taking her chance she dived into a roll as he made a heavy swing at her position expecting to meet resistant force but finding none. She was behind him, cutting at him the moment she had her footing without the burden of over thinking the situation but found herself blocked once more as he threw his blade behind him as if using a sixth sense. She had to learn that move.

Thor whirled around as she took another swing but her sword got caught up in his cape cropping it three quarters of the way up. He was aiming for her again in a low sweep, which she threw herself backward over into a flip landing in a crouch just in time to block his next strike but ultimately over powered by the stronger asgardian and knocked onto the flat of her back.

"You fought well, Fandralkin." He nodded, a look of tired pride etched on his features amongst the droplets of sweat he wiped away with the back of his arm. "You do your ancestors proud."

"Can I get up now?" She winced at something hurting her back looking down at the pointy end of a sword a centre meter from her throat with a swallow.

"Do you see how well she fights, Balder, Loki?" The bimbo had already forgotten her, turning his back as he wandered over to the others leaving her to get up on her own.

"I spar with her often." Balder agreed.

"As brave as they come, as I told you friend." He laughed, clapping Balder on the shoulder hardly making him move at all despite the force being enough to toss Kari back to midgard. "She would do well among midgardians. I do not think she will ever surpass anyone here however."

"There is more to war than mindless thug tactics and swinging a sword." Loki cut in.

"Spells and trickery you mean, brother."

"Magic is as noble an art as any other. Even more so I say."

"Aye, you fight well with them I will admit, but what of it?"

"A wager." The god of mischief was twinkling with green glee.

"A wager? On what, brother?" Thor could hardly contain his amusement. "That you will yield to me a second time?"

"A wager that with magic and swordsmenship combined even, Karian Motter, will defeat an asgardian in combat." Loki meant business, the two brothers now standing practically chest-to-chest as if ready for round two.

"You intrigue me, brother." The god of thunder idly scratched his beard, pondering further on the possibilities such a game might showcase. "You shall have the month to ready her."

"Hey!" Kari yelled, indignant as she strolled towards the group of boys.

"Let her face someone not so well known." Loki bargained. "A guard perhaps?"

"HEY!" She shouted louder this time, catching the two princes attention towards her furious scowling face. "I am not a thing to be bartered and wagered over! I'm a human being for gods sakes!"

They stared at her; disinterest, amusement and astonishment etched on both their faces. Balder instantly glanced over to something of great interest as she sought out his support, a curiousness of his own in play as well as not wishing to defy two princes of asgard. Looking away from her once again, and back at each other, Loki and Thor shrugged in unison at what they had just heard either not understanding her reluctance or simply not caring.

"Agreed." Thor nodded his accord gripping his brother's shoulder with a strong grip and shake.

"Come, Motter." Loki was all smiles as he strolled towards her, latching onto her wrist and yanking her after him. "There is not time to lose with your dawdling."

"Let me... ah…" She squealed tripping up on debris as her least favourite person dragged her at what was a jogging speed for her with his longer legs. "Let me go!"


	49. Chapter 49: The voice

Stupid Loki, stupid Thor, stupid library and stupid Kari who could not understand half of the books in front of her. She was tired, hideously exhausted with great bags under her eyes and yet there seemed to be no end to the pile of books appearing one after the other besides her on the desk.

Loki, the mastermind of dim-witted that he was, had decided it would be a good idea to expand her reading list to begin with her month of magic boot camp. Fat load of good it was going to do either of them, she had been digesting her way through several books whilst he had been away from asgard and all that had amounted to was a blasphemy of a transfiguration spell that turned everything to wax. Why wax anyway? Only the gods knew, or maybe they did not seeing as she was sitting near one right now and he seemed none the wiser to explain.

What was this book about? It clearly stated to be a tome on rudimentary psycho binding but there was nothing either basic or binding about what she was seeing. So many diagrams, so many words, something about liquidating a person's brain. Wait what?

"Loki!" She whined, kicking the desk to relieve a little of her internal aggravation amongst a groaning outburst. "What is this? Why would I want to make brain juice? Is this from the cooking section?"

"It is times like this that your simplicity does not amuse." He sighed, returning from some alcove with his biggest, dustiest book yet. "That is the beginners guide to mind control magic."

"Beginners?" She flipped the book upside down to check she was not mistakenly reading it the wrong way up. "You're gonna need to bring me the dummies guide if you want me to learn this."

"If only the greatest library in all the nine realms catered for such insolent mortal stupidity but I fear such a book could not exist beyond the space of a blank wall covered in feces."

"Perhaps you should get the internet up here, I bet someone on Wikipedia has already beaten you too that poop wall." She sneezed, eight times in a row, as her mentor dumped his big dusty book on top of the now discarded beginners guide to brain smoothies. "Oh god what is this thing?"

"It was most difficult to locate, a tome both old and wise in dealing with your kind." He blew over the hardback binding, relieving the weight of dust further into her face causing her to continue sneezing obsessively. "We asgardians have had little need of its pages in many centuries."

"Right well… achoo… what is… achoo… fucking argh… achoo… what is it?" She rubbed her nose, clearing a mass of mucus from her sinuses and surreptitiously wiping it off on the back of his green cloak whilst he was still hunched over clearing off the book cover. "The big book of fun spells for little people with Gunthar the rabbi- You bastard!"

"It is a book tailored to your level."

"This is a book for babies!" She frowned, flipping through the index and rolling her eyes at everything she saw. "Sparkle spell? Rainbow in your hand spell? Mess be gone spel- Actually that one could be useful…"

"I thought you mi-"

"Oh my god! Pink sweetroll spell!" Kari giggled like a small child, fumbling through the pages looking for the corresponding place for instant sweetrolls.

"Yes, well, perhaps this is redundant in its simplicity." Loki was ever so slightly vexed as he snatched the book away from his pupil. "You will find nothing of use in here to defend you against an asgardian warrior. Return to your previous studies."

"Oooh nooooo!" She griped, banging her head against the desk twice for emphasis before resting against it with her hands covering her head. "I can't do this anymore today, I don't get it. I don't get books. Just a bunch of wiggly ink stains and waffling on about stuff that doesn't make any sense. Argh. Besides, it's dinner time and I've got some sort of eating thing with Balder so…"

"No."

"No what? I don't have a dinner thing with Balder?"

"How very uncharacteristically astute of you." He smiled a winning smile of a champion having just defeated a beast called ignorance.

"What? Why?" She could not help but scratch her scalp to relieve the pressure of suspicion weighing heavy on her brain. "Did he say something to you?"

"Not relating to your evening meal plans."

"Then… how do you know I don't have a dinner thing?"

"Because I am ordering you to remain where you are until you have finished reading these books."

"Loki…" She swallowed, looking the pile of jenga style tilting books up and down with a serious expression. "I don't mean to call into question your sanity… well I do actually… but… see… you obviously don't know me. I mean, it took me four years to read and remember the menu at the restaurant I used to work at and that was only like three pages of food items in really big font with pictures. You really believe I am going to manage all these books in a few hours?"

"I know you will do your best, Karian Motter." He smirked nestling himself comfortably into his chair besides her and resting his feet on his desk. "I know you will devour these books until all that empty space in your puny mind is overflowing with knowledge. I know that in a month's time you will use that knowledge to defeat your opponent, whomever he may be, and gain my victory over Thor. I know all these things to be true. And do you know why, Motter?"

"Because you really seem to uh, believe in me?" She shrugged. "Or you're loco insanio? Which kind of fits with you actually."

"No, you poor, simple, foolish creature." He laughed at a joke she knew to be at her expense. "You will achieve these tasks I have commanded of you because otherwise I will be forced to punish you most severely."

"Yeah right." She rolled her eyes at him with an added chuckle of mockery. "Like what?"

"For starters I will burn each strand of your hair down to the root one by one as you watch."

"You're a dick."

"Read, Motter." He smirked again, resting his hands behind his head as he leaned deeper into his chair.

What was a girl in asgard supposed to do alone with a Loki and some books? To be honest, the books were far scarier than the god of mischief could ever be to her but it was of little consolation. Reading till she died of a brain aneurism was not the way she had expected to go in the end.

Slouching in her chair she lifted the book of psycho-babble-nonsense into an upright balance on the desk and rested her chin in front of it so as to get back to reading. Reciting the words in her head was easy enough, she was literate after all, but comprehending them was an entirely different story. Words went in, 'blah blah blah' floated back out through her nostrils covered in bogies. Academia was not her forte; she failed most of her high school classes for goodness sakes. What was this lunatic expecting of her? Oh and now her stomach was growling.

Wait a minute that was not a rumbling protest from her innards, she realized, lifting her head to follow the rhythmic noise. Her lips parted ever so slightly, allowing room for her smile to widen and expose a little teeth as a bonus. Oh this was precious. How cute he looked all peaceful and vulnerable drooped in a chair asleep. Of course, he had been awake fighting with Thor for like three days so no wonder the poor baby was exhausted enough for a nap. Might also explain his mentally challenged behaviour all afternoon. There was only one thing for it.

Standing up, slowly so as to make as little sound as possible, Kari slipped past her chair and began tiptoeing across the library floor. She probably need not have worried quite so hard about her volume when he was so deeply captured in the world of dreams and snoring louder than her footsteps could ever possibly be. The prince really needed to see a doctor about that nasal problem he was having.

She escaped out of the library, breaking into a run the moment she cleared the threshold straight towards the dining hall. If she hurried, Balder might still be there waiting for her; or so she hoped. Half tumbling into the great room, out of breath and hair a complete mess, the tables were mostly empty. The staff was wandering around, clearing up platters, plates and leftovers spread up walls around the few stragglers arm wrestling and making idle conversation over cups of wine. Her disappointment was short lived, however, having spotted Balder's purple adorned hulk of form down the far end of the hall with Thor and several women. Should she be jealous of those women? Yes, yes she should, they were much to pretty and giggly to be swooning quite so hard around her sexy-time interest.

"Balder!" She came up behind the half turned warrior, currently engaged in dialogue with a thick-lipped woman with far too much bling on. "Sorry I'm late."

"Kari." He swung round on his seat just in time to receive her tired leaning on his shoulder.

"Is this not that midgardian servant, Balder?" Thick-lips smiled sweetly as she gave her competition a thorough surveying obviously finding nothing to worry herself over.

"Yup." Kari answered before Balder had the chance to respond and leaned somewhat over him to reach the partially eaten contents on his plate. "Are you going to eat this?" She queried even as she plucked a chicken leg away and began eating it as he watched on as if trying to ascertain the correct response. "Thanks, I'm starving. Loki has had me locked in the damn library since this afternoon breathing down my neck and getting on my case about book reading. Hasn't even let me have anything to drink because he thinks I waste to much time peeing or something."

"Your friend's manners are certainly interesting."

"Indeed they are." Balder replied his original bench fellow, pushing his plate to the side to allow Kari easier access to her continuing pillaging. "Prince Loki has allowed you free at last?"

"Well… not exactly he-"

"Fandralkin!" The god of thunder interrupted, suddenly becoming aware of the new arrival half draped over Balder and eating his remaining dinner.

"Thor." She waved him off without a glance, hoping he would simply get back to his flirting with the gaggle of squealing girls surrounding him. "As I was saying, he hasn't exactly let me out. I sort of had to slip away whilst he had fallen asleep and-"

"Motter!"

She froze, nobody called her Motter anymore, not on asgard, apart from Loki. Had he really awoken so soon? She was still in the middle of Balder's dinner and explaining her daring escape from book hell. Why could he not just sleep till morning, or forever like a Disney princess? No true loves first kiss for him.

"He's right behind me isn't he?"

"Indeed he is." Thick-lips responded faster than Balder could manage forcing the warrior into open-mouthed silence once more.

"Ergh…" Kari groaned, jointly at Loki and the catty grin Balder's companion was giving her. "At least let me finish eating."

"You can eat when you have finished reading." He was not giving in an inch, arms folded and all stubborn air about him.

"I'll starve before that happens!"

"A little starving might do you good, Motter."

"Woah! Woah! Did you just call me fat?" She had to take a step back and double take what he had so casually just implied. "Bitch this is so on!" She began rolling up her sleeves, ready to start pulling hair as the trickster sighed reaching into a hidden pocket for some sort of pouch. "Hey, what are you…!"

"Brother, do not torment the maiden." Thor chastised though he was still chuckling over the situation. "Give back her voice."

"She is preferable to me this way." Loki shook his head in decline; tilting his head to the side to admire the soundless shouting Kari was abusing him with. "Forgive me but I can not hear you, Motter. Take you back to the library to read your books? Why of course I will and when you have finished I will see about returning your speech to you." He obliged, grin widening as she gave up on verbal swearing and turned to gestures of the one finger brand. "Now, now, no need for that."

Loki turned around with the swish of his cloak and proceeded to leave presumably in the direction of the library. What was she going to do? He had effectively kidnapped her vocal chords and was holding them hostage. Deflating she turned giving Balder an upset frowny face as she mouthed the words 'save me' to which he shook his head with an uncomprehending shrug. What was a girl to do on her own in asgard? Follow the green goblin back to his lair and study.


	50. Chapter 50: Acquired

Pain raced its way back and forth along her spinal chord, accumulating into a throbbing mass at the base of her spine and lesser so in the curve of her neck. Kari groaned as her discomfort reached its peak and finally managed to rouse her from unconsciousness. Blinking in a flutter of light she pushed herself gradually up from the awkward position she half lay in, across the desk, having used a book as a pillow and gotten a little drool over the open pages.

There was no sign of Loki, not until she managed to sit up right and shake the fluff from her ears. On closer inspection the god of mischief was lounging idly across the ledge of a dominating arched window across the room flicking through a book and blurred in her sleep deprived vision. Sunlight was beginning to filter into the library; the candle that had kept her company through most of the night now burnt out and spent besides her on the desk. She must have fallen asleep an hour or two ago though her body ached and felt chilled as if not having slept at all.

Releasing a long drawn out breath Kari rubbed her eyes clear, fussing the hair out of her face, and turned her attention back to the book she had been reading. It was the third she had managed to get to, though still stuck repeating the same page in the first chapter for the unknown time. She had no idea how she had managed to get through the last two, did not remember a word of what was in them but she had recited them in her head as he wanted her too. Maybe he was right; maybe the squiggly ink symbols would fill the empty space in her head and she would get smarter or something. Maybe, but incredibly unlikely.

Finally reaching the end of chapter one she exhaled tiredly and pushed a bookmark towards the books spine before closing it. As 'fun' as all this was, the irritating tweeting of the birds outside the windows were warning her of how late the hour had become. She needed to go, take a quick bath if she had time and get to the kitchens for work.

Sliding her chair out she rose from her seat carefully; her whole body was stiff and tender as she attempted to stretch a little before slowly making her way across the library towards a serene Loki. He looked well rested, upon coming closer he smelt freshly washed and those were definitely new clothes he was wearing. Bastard must have snuck away whilst she was asleep to his room. No wonder he had not awoken her like he had been doing all night every time she dosed off.

Opening her mouth to say something she paused, realizing he still had her voice under lock and key and snorted as she leaned in closer tapping the prince on the shoulder. He paused at her touch, turning sharply with an infuriated expression as if she had offended him greatly before slamming his book shut.

"What is it?" He demanded though his features soon relaxed from a frown to neutrality as she mouthed out words to him he could not hear. "I think not." He shifted his legs one over the other as he reclined on his perch apparently able to lip read. "I only suggested I might return it if you completed your task. Besides, it is far more peaceful in the palace with you silent." He sighed as she rolled her eyes at him and continued a silent arm waving conversation. "'Two and a bit' is not the completion of your task. Return to your studies." Loki discarded his book unimpressed with her stubbornness. "No, you will not. I care not for your work ethic, but I suppose a good dog deserves a bone."

Oh how it pained him to relinquish what was his. She could see the prickling burns of displeasure amongst the green of his eyes as he reached into a concealed pocket and produced the pouch from yesterday. Excitement flushed her tired pale skin back to life as he stuck his hand inside apparently looking for the correct voice among many before pulling it loose.

"Now you shall return to your desk and continue before I change my mind and take what was previously stolen once more."

"Yeah right, Loki. Like I was saying before I need to get to w-" Kari froze having heard her voice for the first time in hours and unable to correctly recognize it. "Why do I…? Is this… Loki why do I sound like Serana?"

"You thought I would surrender my hold over you so easily? For nothing more than your unheard assurance of co-operation?" Loki chuckled. "Do you take me for a fool, Karian Motter?"

"You're a dick!" She scowled biting down on her lip to relieve some of the urge to punch him. "What are you doing with Serana's voice anyway?"

"Such sweet persuasions and wounding of prides must be punished and how better than to remove the vixens deadliest weapon. How she longed to speak and flatter."

"Wait… so you…" This was really weird; the god of mischief's way of getting over heartbreak was certainly unique but why was she getting dragged into it too? "Could you just keep me out of your sordid affairs for once? Give me back my own voice!"

"I am not inclined to." He shrugged getting comfortable with his book once more.

"Well fuck you then. I'm still going to work, not as if I need to talk and-"

"I have already explained to you once, do not make me explain to you again." He was getting enraged now. "Your place is here."

"My place is in the kitchen…" She really needed to kick herself for saying that later. "I have stuff to do, a job and responsibilities that do not revolve around your petty squabbles with your bimbo of a brother. Maybe you should try getting a career or something. Might work all these stupid kinks out of your personality and you'd be a damn well lot less idle without all this free time to act like a spoilt brat. How old are you anyway? You act like you're eight or something. Stupid capes on, brawling every five minutes. Just go build a tree house out in the gardens and stay up there pretending to be king of the universe till you grow up already."

"Are you quite finished." It was a warning, not a question but she hardly cared now her mouth had the meter running.

"No I'm no-"

"Be quiet!" He bellowed, squishing her lips together between his fingers and holding tight as she struggled against him before stilling realizing her defeat. "Merciful silence." He released a great sigh capturing her fuming gaze with his own resilient green. "You will wait here. You will not leave this room whilst I am gone or on my word, as a prince of asgard, I will forever keep your voice from you. Do you understand?" He smiled, relieved as she nodded and released her from his grip. "Good. Continue your studies and I shall return shortly."

"Where are yo-"

"Quiet." He spoke softly but there was enough of a threat hidden in the deeper layers of his tone to hush her. "Good girl."

"You…" She bit her tongue, holding back the insults lining up ready to be released, as he raised his finger in preparation of scolding.

Loki nodded his satisfaction at her obedience, however scowling it was delivered and hopped down from his perch in order to make his way out of the library. She watched after him, arms crossed and kicking the ground with the tip of her shoe. What was his majesty up to now? Whatever he was going to do she was sure she would not like it but what choice did she have when he held such a ransom over her head. On a similar note, why did it seem the less they got on the more they were forced together? It must be of his doing, the way he was talking to her as if training a badly behaved puppy. Was that his game? Train her to be obedient to him? Things were so much better when he was getting laid now she got to re-taste pent up Loki. Well at least she assumed he was celibate at the moment. He did tell her prostitutes hung out in the palace after all. Ew, what if he had an STD or something? Wait, didn't he say he had a daughter a couple of years ago now she recalled? She really needed to stop thinking about Loki so hard. Ignoring him was definitely the better option and maybe he would go away if she stopped paying him attention.

Walking back over to her desk, Kari slid into her chair once more huffing her exhausted displeasure as she buried her forehead between folded arms on the desk. A sense of desolation was beginning to wash over her. No superhero to save her day. Even her grandfather was off gallivanting around wherever he was and who knew when he would return. Would he help her fend off Loki anyway? Probably not, he was a god and prince and that after all.

"I'm doomed." She lowered her voice an octave chuckling at the strange quality it gave to Serana's tone.

By the time Loki finally returned, Kari was fast asleep again cuddling onto a book about the element of fire. Of course, he shook her conscious after trying several times to awaken the bedraggled woman with verbal commands eager to be heard right away. She was not happy, actually she was positively grumpy and moody as she told him where to shove it and threatened to throw a book at him before he had the chance to assert his dominance over her and the situation.

"I bring such glad tidings and you dare to threaten me?" He was looming above her as she yawned remembering her resolve to ignore him as much as possible. "Fix yourself, you look a mess, Motter."

"Yeah, yeah." She slouched, resting her hand upon her palm and bracing most of her top weight on her elbow. "Nobody to look pretty for here. It's only you and me, Loki."

"Ah yes, my mistake, it is only Balder the brave you resign yourself to appear pretty for now."

"Oh that's so sweet, you think I'm pretty."

"Silence." All right maybe ignoring him was not a do able plan seeing as how much fun it was to make him mad. "I command that you will discontinue your relations with that noble bore."

"You can't make me." She laughed waving him off with her free hand.

"But I can." Gosh was he looking smug about something. "I have just now returned from discussions with my mother and the queen has agreed that you are now mine."

"Yours?" Kari snorted her disbelief of his latest ploy to shock and aggravate her.

"A servant of Loki, prince of asgard, and under my command."

"I'm not a piece of meat or a slave or something." She rolled her eyes at his widening, wolfish grin; his enjoyment was only rising the more she defied him. "You can't just decide stuff like that without my consent."

"But I can."

"No, but you can't." She mocked him. "I'll go talk to Frigga myself."

"If you wish."

"I can just quit you know."

"Is that what you have been led to believe?" He tilted his head to the side admiring her with a regretful knitting of his brow as she squirmed uncomfortably at the level of sincerity oozing off him like synthetic banana flavouring. "Pitiable fool. You know nothing of your circumstance and place in this realm. Did no one explain it to you?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh this is good."

"Stop laughing!" She was getting cross now, tired, provoked and now being laughed at for something that was surely not real – perhaps this whole conversation was a hallucination but could she ever be so lucky. "I don't even know what you are laughing about so you just look crazy."

"Forgive me, this is one of those moments where in your simplicity amuses me once more." Loki straightened his spine, restraining his desire to continue his mirth for the preferred sensible delicacy his next words needed to display. "When the allfather, my father, ordained you stay and never be permitted to leave our realm you became property of the palace and the house of Odin."

"Wait what?"

"Midgardians are not allowed to live in asgard unless invited or as favoured servants. You were never invited, you were simply acquired, Karian Motter."

"I…" She paused, sucking in a large intake of oxygen to boost her slothful cognitive abilities into working order. "What are you… uh… Even if that's true, and I'm not saying I believe you for a second, liar, but if I'm like some slave owned by Odin how exactly could Frigga give me to you?"

"The queen is in charge of the household duties, it is her responsibility to distribute and allocate goods to the household members, I being one of the household as a son of Odin." He smiled cheerfully as he noted the droop of her shoulders and surprised, wide-eyed, realization dawning across her features. "Do not fret, I shall treat you well so long as you obey me."

"Fuck you Loki."


	51. Chapter 51: He's not gay

It started out as a slow walk, brushing past the green-eyed prince and out into the corridor but as the distance between he and her grew her pace quickened. A shake started from her fingertips and worked its way along her arm and up into her throat before venting through tear ducts as a caught wounded wetness. One foot in front of the other became a sprint, her body ached weighed down with fatigue but a certain level of energy was discovered stored away for such emergencies that needed escape.

She knew she was not equal on some levels, the hierarchy of royalty being one but the indication of being property had certainly never crossed her mind. Sure she was imprisoned in a kingdom but it was far from being shackled in a dungeon. They gave her a job, but it was nothing she was not used to and they did pay her. This just did not make sense; Loki must have been lying about something.

In search of answers, Kari made a left turn towards the gardens and entered unrequested into the queen's personal space. It was the perfect time to catch her alone, tending to her plants during the chilly morning where she had no doubt just spoken to Loki moments earlier. Frigga was surprised to see her and equally so worried when she noted the unkempt state Kari was in from her all night study session. Kari, on the other hand, was a burning mixture of incensed and confused, the latter of which holding her riled up nerves into a strict and taut heel. She refused to even wipe the now drying tears, streaked across her cheeks, away not wishing to lose sight of her target.

"Did you just give me to Loki?" She demanded an answer to her question.

"I transferred you to his services, if that is what you mean, dear."

"So you can just do that?" It was true then. "Give me to someone without asking me?"

"Loki came to make an appeal for an additional servant and after further discussion his request seemed most beneficial to you both. My son has always maintained an absolute minimal number of servants, preferring a strong level of independence. Working for him emits less stress than your previous position, I will have someone I know can care for him when he neglects himself and Loki remains at home, out of trouble when he is not bored. He seems eager to tutor you in magic. Is this not something you wished?"

"Yes but-"

"Then we all benefit from your transfer." Frigga turned her back to her once more; pruning back the dead leaves from a series of bushes.

"But I… I hate him!"

"You do not."

"Excuse me?" Kari could not believe what she was hearing. "Frigga, your son is a dick! I won't work for him!"

"Do not be so childish."

"No bu-"

"Not another word." The queen meant it, her usually caring tone soured by a fierceness risen to the surface.

Kari fell silent, breathing heavily through her nose as she gave the freshly turned soil beneath them a frustrated look of depression. There it was again, the accusation of being juvenile by everyone around her and like her actual formative years as a child and teenager, nobody was listening to what she wanted. Benefit her? No this would not benefit her as Frigga suggested. She liked her current job, she did not like Loki and overall the sense that being a servant for the prince would make her ten times miserable rang like a loud bell. It benefitted Loki and Frigga not her but what could she do about it?

Turning her head to the side, Kari spotted a set of golden eyes watching her diligently on a bench. She moved closer scratching behind the ear of the happy to see her feline as he purred deep and loud in response. The temptation to pick him up screaming 'you can't have him' brewed in the pit of her stomach but really that actually would be incredibly childish. Also, Griffin would no doubt just wander back to the queen by himself the moment an open door or window was presented. Cats!

With a venting sigh, she gave the cat one last pat on the head and turned leaving the heavily perfumed gardens. She was stressed, caged in and unable to escape from whatever horrors awaited her. The sense of being a soldier pending deployment in a war zone filled her nerves as she made her way slowly back to her room. Everything, the palace, asgard, it all felt unsafe all of a sudden; a feeling she disliked most strongly. Pending doom, an apocalypse already arrived that reminded her of her final foster home right before her sixteenth birthday. She may not have liked the last people that took her in but the fear of the unknown world she was about to be kicked out into was terrifying.

Kari groaned, running her hand through her knotted hair to push back the unrelenting memories and grabbed her iPod from its charger. She could not stop thinking now she had started and her mind to weak from lack of sleep to put up a superior fight. Scuttling across her room she opened the wardrobe door and climbed inside. Nobody would look for her in there and with enough looping music her overactive imagination would soon give up to have a mental karaoke party.

Who knew how long she sat there, knees tucked under her chin nodding her head to a medley of sorry-for-yourself songs. At some point she had dosed off to a Donna Summer's disco ballad about last chances and dancing or something. It was probably around the afternoon when she started to wake again, the push to stir her consciousness being her aching stomach cantankerous at hardly being fed over the last two days. What pulled her awake enough to open her eyes however was something entirely different.

A hand pushed the loose strands of hair covering her ears away, tugging loose the buds blaring music out and reeling in the iPod draped on the floor besides her. She opened her eyes confused by the sensation and sudden quiet as she blinked in the half-light flooding in through the open wardrobe door.

"Granddad?" She yawned, covering her eyes with an irritated sound at the slight headache forming across her temples at the abuse of unexpected burning light.

Strong arms wrapped around her, helping her up onto unsteady feet and out into her messy room. She leaned into him, resting her head against his shoulder as he guided her towards the bed but something made her senses grow abruptly alert. The smell was all wrong. Pushing away from him she tumbled into a sitting position on her bed and stared up at a familiar looming presence.

"Loki, the hell?"

"I am unsure which is less attractive, your hair or your room at this moment." He commented dryly, kicking a pile of dirty underwear on the floor with his toe.

"Get out of my room!" She stood erratically caught off balance by the dipping nature of the mattress beneath her as well as her pent up fury clouding her judgment. "You can't just come barging in like you own the place! This is MY space, not yours!"

"Karian-"

"Kari! My name is Kari!"

"Motter," he smirked as she growled at his infuriating behaviour, "I was simply searching for my missing servant. I knocked several times on your door without answer and hearing your snoring within assumed you must have fallen into a sleeping sickness of some kind."

"I was not snoring, that was my stomach making whatever sound you heard and secondly, sleeping sickness? Really? We're going into Jane Austin novel made up illnesses again? Especially when there is a reason I might be taking a nap that you know very well you are the cause of!"

"Let us not quarrel over the past. We shall start a new this day."

"Don't touch me." She slapped his hand away as he tried to place it upon her shoulder in a friendly gesture.

"Very well." His eyes refocused, dangerous and predatory in his study of her. "Clean yourself, your aroma is repugnant and arrive at the library within the hour."

"Fuck you."

"Do not fight me on this, Motter, my patience is hardly infinite."

She bit her lip, frowning harder than she had previously thought possible as they stared one another down – or in her case up. A feeling overwhelmed her reasoning, his expression though outwardly neutral and calm radiated the knowledge he was a man on the edge only needing the slightest of provocation to watch her burn to ashes. Breathing heavily through her nose again, Kari stiffened her muscles to hold in the desire to start a bigger fight and made her way to the closet for a fresh towel. He said nothing, but his smirk reeked of victory as she past him heading towards the bathroom.

How she wanted to kill him right now. Not even a relaxing bath could calm her rage as she scrubbed the dirt out of her skin a little too hard. This was going to be hell. He was going to make her study, order her around and she would be left with nothing more than the right to fantasize about murdering him. Unless he used some psychobabble nonsense to stop her from thinking about causing him pain too. Why was he doing this anyway? He hated her as much as she hated him. Why else would they argue all the time and he act like a dick to her? All right, maybe he had been nice a couple of times too but that was all to an ends. This was all to an ends too right? He just wanted to beat his brother, Thor, in a stupid bet. Maybe as soon as the bet was over things would go back to normal? She could go back to her old job? A month is all she would need to get through with the prince of douchebaggery, which sounded a hell of a lot better than a lifetime.

Having found some sort of possible silver lining, Kari got out of the tub having cleaned herself to the point of redness. Loki was not around when she exited the bathroom and headed back to her room but he had managed to annoy her despite his lack of presence. The god of mischief had been busy, apparently, her room had been tidied to the point of anal neatness. As a show of defiance she pushed everything on her bedside table onto the floor sending a clutter of items spraying outward and under the bed. What was he thinking? Argh, and he had left her an extra present the little bastard.

Kari growled as she looked down at the perfectly arranged, matching set of clothes lined out on her bed awaiting her. That blue dress had been a favourite of hers to wear on special happy days but now that she knew he liked it she would have to burn it or something. Throwing the clothes off the bed onto the sparkling clean floor she headed over to her chest of draws and worked her way through her clothing. He wanted her to dress nice for him did he? Well two could play at that game and she knew just how to distract him.

Selecting her weapons of choice carefully, she put on a pair of tight, jean shorts and an older white blouse now too big for her teenage form but perfect to wear with just the three middle buttons done up. Legs on display, her best asset, a little stomach showing and a black bra under a white blouse drawing attention to her – not as big as it used to be – cleavage. If he did not react to this he was definitely gay.

Pulling her hair back into a loose braid she chuckled at the thought of the tricksters upcoming expression. It actually made her look forward to studying in the library under his strict attentions now she had a way of winding him up. A little make-up too, the perfect finishing touch to her plan and it dually made her feel better about herself than she had for a while. Why had she ever-stopped dressing up and making an effort again?

Grabbing up a pair of red ballet flats, she made her way out of Fandral's rooms, slipping on her shoes and heading towards the library. She could hardly help the giggle that kept working its way out between her lips as she strutted through the palace getting a flush of curious and pleasant looks from several guards. She still had it even if she could not remember when she had exactly lost it.

"Fandralkin!"

"Hey Thor." She gave the grinning idiot a half wave as they closed in on one another.

"Where go you dressed so?" The god of thunder halted just ahead of her freely taking in her appearance not unhappily.

"Just to the library." She shrugged bored though he appeared startled by her declaration.

"With Loki?"

"Yeah, studying." Kari groaned quietly through a sigh as Thor continued to look confused as if not sure what exactly was going on around him.

"I am on my way to the stables where Balder the brave waits."

"Oh? You guys going off on a trip or something?"

"A visit of midgard."

"Earth? Argh, can't you hide me under your cloak and take me too?"

"Haha! Even so covered Heimdall would not so easily be fooled."

"Aww well… tell Balder I say hey and uh… technically he owes me dinner seeing as he didn't actually eat with me."

"I shall relay your message." Thor visibly seemed to relax at her interest in Balder; no longer quite so confused. "Good luck in your endeavor, Fandralkin."

"Uh, yeah, I could do with some luck." She laughed giving the bimbo a tap on the shoulder as he normally did to her causing him to join in with her humor. "Same to you, both of you."

With a final farewell she continued on her path towards the library, leaving Thor to get on with his trip to midgard. Sudden realization dawned on her as she hit her forehead with her palm; she should have asked them to bring her back a souvenir or something specific seeing as they were going to her world. Pouting, Kari held her stomach as it rumbled angrily at its lack of feeding and made the conscious decision to bypass the library in order to pick up some lunchtime leftovers from the kitchens.

She was only a little late when she finally got to the library; really an hour was not enough time for a girl to get ready and to work anyway so it was his own fault for setting such a stupid deadline of arrival. Still, he did not look angry when she walked in carrying a plate piled with yummy things. Instead Loki was sitting at his desk with a book in one-hand and a cup of tea in the other. He could not get more relaxed looking if he was a puppy getting a tummy rub.

"Hey Loki." She sounded a lot more cheerful than she probably needed to be but she had just been nibbling on a sweet pastry and those things were delicious.

He turned to eye her with what was probably supposed to be suspicion and malcontent but was rapidly disrupted as he spotted her walking over and placing her lunch on her desk besides him. There was an abrupt spray of pre-swallowed tea heading in a diagonal firing pattern right across her desk that she barely managed to hop out of the way of.

"Oh my… eww that's disgusting." Kari cringed as she noted some of Loki's germy tea had landed on her lunch.

With a defiant head-shaking sigh she reached forward and took another pastry off her plate eating it anyway. It really was not the most unsanitary thing she had ever put in her mouth and wasting food was bad anyway. The act also came with the added bonus of making Loki looking further flustered amongst his embarrassed discomfort.


	52. Chapter 52: A baby and puke

Well her teasing had been rather anti-climatic in its finality. Despite being caught off guard at first, Loki had soon taken control of the situation once more, covering her with his cloak and commanding her to 'read' before getting back to his own book and remaining tea. She would have looked a little more disappointed at his disregard if not for having just scored a pretty nice green cloak he was so not ever going to get back again.

They read on in silence one appearing happy and the other miserable about the situation. Her thoughts continued to drift away from the words on the pages, as she munched on pastry after pastry no longer caring about maintaining her figure. Thor had been acting odd now that she thought about it. What was with all those nervous glances? Wait, maybe it was her voice; she still had Serana's after all and who knew when Loki would give back her own.

"Loki?" She whined in just that particular manner he disliked.

"Read." He ignored her with his eyes, keeping his attention well trained on his book.

"But-"

"Read." He repeated with a little force.

"Argh, you're impossible." Kari readjusted herself, kicking one leg over the other towards him and not failing to notice the way his glance momentarily followed the movement. "Loki?" She tried softer just as Serana would say his name and twirled her ankle slowly making him turn his back to her with a disinterested cough. "Loki, my princy?" Oh that had his attention with a sudden back stiffening. "It makes me so sad when you ignore me."

"Stop that, this instant."

"Stop what Loki?" She gave a sickly sweet giggle. "Have I done something to upset my princy?"

"Motter…" His voice lowered dangerously. "If you continue your impersonation I shall treat you as I did Serana."  
"I do not understand what you mean, Loki." She continued, reveling in his annoyance.

"Very well." He nodded, standing up and closing his book with an exaggerated 'snap'.

Continuing to flash him her legs she grinned at the stern expression on his face but soon faltered into confusion as he leaned forward and swiped the books off her desk in a single motion. Watching the disrespectful treatment of library property she blinked several times at the display before turning her gaze back to the trickster with a tad of concern. There was not any further time to think upon his reaction to her teasing as a new dilemma presented itself. He grabbed her by the arms, pulling her forcibly upwards before crashing her down on the desk and claiming her lips with his own. This was certainly not what she envisioned the outcome of her Serana impersonation being. Instead she imagined he would simply get annoyed by his ex-lovers voice and give her back her own.

Kari inwardly cringed as she felt his hand working its way up her right leg, his kiss hard and dominating but denied further access by her tight lipped defense. He stilled when she pushed at his shoulders, breaking contact with her face far enough to allow her to roll her head to the side in a show of apathy towards his advance. With a snort and shake of his head, Loki pushed away from the desk heading back to his chair to allow her to collect herself once more.

"I warned you." He said darkly, retrieving his book to resume where he left off.

She would have made some retort, told him she hated him or something to that effect if not the entire situation turned her stomach. The moment of being airborne, his unwanted touching but most of all the large quantity of pastries she had devoured in such a short lapse of time quickly caught up with her. Slapping a hand across her mouth she heaved unfruitful, gaze darting around the room until falling on the teapot on Loki's desk and making a grab for it. He eyed her suspiciously as she leaned across him, stealing his belongings but abruptly turned his gaze away as she puked into the container.

The god of mischief looked about ready to make some remark as she half leaned onto her desk cradling the teapot but was soon silenced by her 'wait a second' hand gesture. There were still a few more pastries on the reserve team about to tag out.

It was most likely not an occurrence that had ever happened to the prince before; kiss a girl and she vomits in response. He had not taken it very well if his inability to maintain eye contact over the next few days was anything to go by. At least as some sort of consolation, though most likely to his benefit of never having to deal with her impersonations again, he had returned her original voice to her. The whole endeavor, however horrifyingly repetitive it seemed to be becoming between her and Loki, had at least made for a humorous conversation with Prue when she visited the tired looking redhead.

The two women hardly spoke, Kari scarcely remembering the why she felt the need to keep her distance anymore but with the new presence of a baby who could resist a peek. Egill was like a delirious man-child hardly allowing his son out of his arms for a second unless Prue was shouting at him to put their child down. Finally, Kari found it was her turn to have a cuddle with the newborn and get a proper look at the small bundle. He was a lot heavier than she imagined, kind of wrinkly and pink but the spitting image of his father with red hair. It was a sobering experience getting to hold something so fragile and in need of protection. This could have been her son if she had married Egill; what an odd mother she would have been.

"He's gorgeous." She chuckled as the babe opened his eyes looking up at her with a constipated expression. "What you going to call him?"  
"Vidrald." Egill cooed whilst Prue rolled her eyes at her grinning husband.  
"Not if I have any choice in the matter." Prue intercepted her husband's premature announcement with a look of 'oh really now'.  
"But my love, Vidrald is a good and noble name. The name of my grandfather."  
"And Stenvar is a better name."

"Stenvar is no warrior's name."

"Are you insulting my grandfather's name now, Egill?"

"No my love." Egill sighed the sigh of a man under the thumb. "But your grandfather is a maker of textiles where as my grandfather was a prestigious warrior having seen many great battles before his death. The name is far superior."

"So now your family is superior to my family?" Egill was in trouble now. "If I am so low born in your eyes it is wonder you ever dare marry me."

"My love-" He attempted to placate his fiery wife.

"Do not 'my love' me and try to twist and turn me with your pretty words. You are no wordsmith, Egill." Prue crossed her arms squaring the larger warrior off with a level of determination any man would fear. "I have spent most of the year with that child growing in my belly. He is more mine than yours by the work put into his creation."

"That is unfair, my love, you know I would of helped more if there was a way." Egill sighed, exasperated at their newest argument but also enjoying the battle of words on some level. "This is madness. Fandralkin, what say you?"

"What?" Kari was wide-eyed and caught in the headlights having been trying to ignore the raised voices by pulling silly faces at the baby giving her alien expressions in response.

"Do not bring others into this."

"I search opinion, my love, nothing more." Egill raised both hands in surrender to his wife before continuing his address to their guest. "What say you, Vidrald the name of a warrior or Stenvar the name of a maker of textiles?"

"Uh…" Kari bit her lip looking from Egill's puppy dog eyes to Prue's defiant stare on pain of death. "Stenvar is kind of pretty I guess?"

"You see, Egill." Prue was quick to crow her victory.

"You corrupt her answer with your eyes, my love." Egill was not happy with their guests answer, choosing to pout and stare longingly out the window in response.

"So now I am a beguiling witch, say you?"  
"Your parents are scary, Stenvar." Kari began walking around the room taking the baby away from the squabbling pair as far as possible. "Run away as soon as you can walk."


	53. Chapter 53: I don't trust the horse

"He has such tiny toes." Kari was all a beam having returned from yet another visit with Prue and Stenvar Vidrald Egillson – at least some of her earthling culture of middle names had proven useful to the on the rocks marriage. "I can't believe how strong he is too. He managed to grab hold of my little finger and…" She stared in a mixture of pride and anguish at her bandaged pinky. "Well… the break should heal at some point I guess. I don't suppose you have a healing spell for this?"

"Motter." Loki pursed his lips, weighing a book in one hand before nodding his approval as he prepared himself to take aim.  
"He's so quiet though. I thought babies were supposed to cry and be noisy all the time? Maybe he takes after his father but… he definitely has Prue's glare."

"Prepare yourself to cast, at your convenience." The toxic level of sarcasm in his tone did not go unnoticed.

"Ooh, you sound just like my grandfather." She rolled her eyes at the innocence-feigning trickster, standing across from her half way down an aisle of books, and casually brought to life a sickly looking shield spell that politely reflected a hurled pocket sized oxford dictionary. "Anyway, do you think we're born with personalities or do we develop them? Nature versus nurture? Because I think Stenvar definitely has a-"

"Spell up." Loki continued to ignore her cooing aunty-Kari prattle as he tossed a larger paperback at the distracted simpleton – at least he could enjoy the anger management aspect of this lesson.

"Argh, stop that already I have it down!" Kari whined, having become skittish at the close proximity – and near failing shield – of such a forcibly thrown projectile. He was enjoying this a little too much if his continued innocence feigning was anything to go by. "I bet you were one of those horrible fussy babies that threw his toys out the cot and cried until a servant put them back in again. Your mother might think you were a little angel but it was probably all the hormones clouding her memories."

"Are you quite finished?"

"When am I ever finished anything?"

"Exactly." He sighed.  
"Eh, you were probably a lucky bastard born with a head full of hair. I was two before I had much of anything going on upstairs and even then it was all weird with white blond streaks in it. I looked like I belonged to the Addams family and oof-"

"Spell up, Motter." He parroted his mantra of the afternoon, this time, however, after the fact he had thrown the soiled hardback book of dumpling making. "Motter?" He quirked an eyebrow at her latest fiasco – lying in a tangled heap on the floor with a cookery book sprawled uncomfortably over her chest. "Motter?" He sucked in a calming breath, arms folding to hold in the annoyance that was his burdensome, offspring obsessed, pupil continuing her attempt of out tricking a trickster – and not even well, he had performed this very same act on her not so long ago. "Motter, there is no time for such trifling games this day. Do you desire the great honor of doing my laundry as well as your other tasks?" Her lack of answer succeeded in its perceived endeavor of infuriating the pushed for time god of mischief and delivered his footfalls on a quick paced interception of the motionless body now under his prodding boot. Still, the lack of activity warranted a minute dose of worry that brought him sharply to his knees in order to reach her throat for a shake. "Karian Motter, open your eyes."

"Ermm." She groaned at the sensation of dueling anxious and angry throttling her upper body was receiving in copious amounts. The world was swimming around her head like a trail of birds when finally she managed to crack open her illusive eyelids and get a confusing focus on pretty green orbs floating around several pale-faced Loki's. "You are beautiful."

He snorted at her delirious truth telling – not the first time he had heard such a statement from her own lips – but coming swiftly to the conclusion this was a concussed midgardian rather than a playful irritant. If only she would stay so flattering at all times. With hardly any effort at all he reached underneath his damsel in distress like a good prince of asgard and lifted her up into his arms for easy transport to see a healer. He had to smile at the way she caressed his cheek in a dream like state, mesmerized by his flawless complexion as he carried her but perhaps he should have been more wary of her state of mind.

There was a happy sort of 'mmm'ing sound reverberating through her chest and into his which reaffirmed to him he most certainly got under her skin more than she would ever admit to. He smiled in a feline manner as her hand slid across his cheek once again, turning his focus back down towards the dilated pupils of the package in his arms. Feral and stupid was certainly a good pair of words to describe her at that moment but the thought needed to get to the back of the queue whilst he considered how to respond to a concussed woman forcing him into a kiss. Really, what was he supposed to do? His arms were otherwise engaged with holding her aloft and it would be dreadfully insensitive and rude not to join in so adamant a game of lip twister.

As fun as it was to tease her with tongue wrestling at any other time, being the submissive for once brought with it a new exhilaration and gratification – though the pleasure tingle of 'this is naughty' still rang clear at the borderline advantage taking of a debilitated female. She was certainly enjoying mapping out his cave system if all the 'please sir can I have some more' moans were anything to go by. With an anti-climatic gasp, however, their faces became un-suctioned from one another as lungs burned to refill the depleted oxygen levels within and Kari promptly went dead weight in the prince's arms with the added bonus of head lulling.

Loki sighed, licking his lips not so much for tasting but rather to clear the excess of mixed saliva around his mouth before continuing on his way to the healers. She was certainly going to be in a mood later when she recalled their little moment in the library and what fun would be had in reminding her of delirious words spoken.

Of course, being the mind boggling, brainless, bundle of idiot that Karian Motter could only achieve, upon waking in a much to bright room with a old man hovering over her and a horrendous headache of the book to the head kind she was unsure of anything much.

"Where am I?" She spoke quietly, a hand braced against her brow to hold back the onslaught of brilliant brightness blinding her eyes.

"You are in the care of healers." The grey bearded healer responded with a level of gentleness only medical care could teach. "I am informed you were involved in a magical accident and took a blow to the head before collapsing."

"I was?" She blinked several times trying to stop focusing on her nose. "I don't remember that."

"That is as you told the several times previous you awoke."

"What? Several what?"

"Are you able to recall your name this time?" He waved a finger in front of her face that she felt compelled to follow out of instinctual caution.

"Of course I can!" She tried to sit, indignant at his silly question but at least finding the room a little less on the alien abduction dazzling side.

"And your name is?"

"Uh… not Fandralkin." Kari scowled, testing a lump on the side of her head that throbbed angrily at some event she could not recall.  
"That is not as I was told."

"Well… you were told lies."

"Still in a bad temper I see." The old man was either a mutant without emotions or so elderly he simply could not care about anything anymore. "But no longer biting others, and your vision seems to be much improved."

"What?"

"Still asking inane questions. Your master informed us this was normal behavior."

"Wait, wait, wait! Master?" Of course he was referring to Loki. "What's he been saying about me?"

"No behavior that was not noted during your time in our care."

"Did he do this to me?"

"According to your master, he blamed the injury on your incompetents."

"Of course he would!" She was not even sure why she was angry with Loki but experience told her it was definitely his fault. "How long have I even been here? I mean, what date is it?"  
"We are but twelve days from Jul, the New Year. You have been in our care since yesterday afternoon."

"Right, ok so, it's still December, I've been here all night and… isn't Balder coming back today?"

"I know not of the warrior's whereabouts."

"Hmmm, well uh, can I go I have, you know, stuff to do and whatever?"

"You seem greatly improved." The old healer shrugged, non-committal to the diagnosis either way but eager to return to a life of naps and quiet contemplation. "Return to your duties."  
"Right..." She elongated the word in the manner of a teenager agreeing verbally but hinting at reality being somewhat rebellious to the adult's desire. "I'll get right back to work now, for my master."

Really, the sarcasm was not needed, it was not as if the grey beard was even listening to her but in honesty the exchange had been more for her benefit than anyone else's. With a great deal of eye-rolling and a stop off at her room for a fresh pair of clothes, Kari made her way out of the palace and onto the rainbow bridge. It certainly had been a long time since she had taken this particular route. At least a year since she had last gone to visit Heimdall, perhaps longer but she could hardly recall with the amount of fuzziness wrapped around her long-term memory. Maybe it was not a good idea to hangout around the bi-frost and wait for her sort of boyfriend to come home whilst her sort of ex-love interest manned the spinny science fiction teleporter. Balder might get lost in something complex and geeky sounding like a reverse polar tachyon dimensional array if Heimdall got in a mood or something. Not that he would get in a mood, what was she worried about? Heimdall was never interested in her in that way anyway, just sort of pitied her.

"Why have you come?" The guardian questioned the approaching midgardian whilst he devoured what looked to be a ham sandwich.

"Hey… Heimdall." Well this was not awkward. "You, actually eat out here?" She had to ask; it was too much of an epiphany moment not to require answers, though he seemed to let his chewing speak for itself. "Of course you do, I mean, you're always here being meticulous and stuff. Err, been a while hasn't it? I mean, yeah, a year or something and um, so, how you been?" She nodded to herself as Heimdall took another bite of his sandwich and turned his head to admire something nobody else could see among a patchwork of red stuff in the starry sky. "Yeah, me too I guess, though I have this crazy headache from a concussion or something. Can't remember how I got it though."

"Loki."  
"What?"

"And a book of dumplings."

"I uh, yeah ok." She bit her lip, looking to the side as if hoping someone would be standing there to tell her what he was talking about. "So… is Balder, uh and Thor coming back anytime soon?"

"Yes."

"That's good, hate to walk all this way for nothing." She chuckled nervously then paled as she heard her last remark on mental playback. "Oh god, not that you're nothing, I mean it's good to see you again and uh, you should come to the palace more often and… whatever… you know?"

Another wave of silent awkwardness fell over the pair, though Heimdall looked to be more in the throws of business than taking any interest in her presence. At least he was not mad about her slip of the tongue and on some level she had to wonder if he even recalled who she was. He did stare at an awful lot of stuff and people all day – an undertaking that required way too much memory and concentration to recall every face he had ever seen. Maybe he did not remember her getting kissy faced with his doppelganger either. That was certainly a nice thought to have but soon irritated into junk mail by the pain in her stomach.

When had she eaten last? Yesterday at some point, though by now after weeks with the trickster her eating schedule had not been so much a three square meals a day type of ordeal but rather a 'snack and run' affair. By the gods did that ham sandwich mostly occupying Heimdall's mouth look good right about now. Her stomach growled loud enough to cause the guardian to turn and give her a questioning look, much to her embarrassed horror.

"Ehehehe… I uh, haven't eaten today." She shrugged looking away as the golden goliath took another bite of his sandwich. "So… you gonna eat all that?"

Heimdall paused his re-examining of constellations, his eyes fixating on a point before his arm swung outward holding the last quarter of his afternoon meal under the nose of his mortal companion. She stared at the offering for a matter of seconds before carefully taking it from his grip and having a long mouth watering sniff. Definitely the gourmet stuff, the ham alone was as thick as her hand with that yummy honey crackling on the edges. How long had it been? Since she was wearing her short childish form definitely – an occurrence she almost wished would happen again from just how well treated she was back in those days.

Biting into the afternoon delight, Kari gave a little foot stomp and turned her head to face the galaxy in 'mmm'ing prayer. She had not had the chance to eat anything this good or not squished from being in her pockets in too long. Demanding Balder marry her right away so she could ascend the social hierarchy like Prue certainly seemed like a reasonable proposal at that moment. Speaking of Balder the brave, Heimdall was no longer standing where he usually liked to loiter but instead was within the bi-frost starting the engine up – the noise of the machine was almost enough to completely distract her from her food.

Crackling lights streaked inside the dome at the end of the bridge, a swirling portal opening at the farthest side as Kari filled her mouth for a second time and admired the prettiness with the added knowledge she would not be riding the puke rollercoaster. With a sound that made her ears pop and ring, two new bodies atop horses appeared in the centre of the dome unphased by their travel and laughing at some joke told before departure. Kari cringed at the neighing beasts ahead of her, scowling heartedly until distracted by her name on the lips of a too happy for his own good blond.

"Fandralkin!"  
"Maa 'ame mis Mmari!" She rolled her eyes, hastily trying to swallow the remnant of bread in her mouth as Thor only continued to smile and shake his head in ignorance.  
"Kari." Balder dismounted his pebble grey mare, distracting his munching greeter from her glaring with the prince with a pearly grin.

She did not need calling twice. The final bite of the sandwich was hastily given back to the guardian – a metaphor about leftovers probably in the exchange somewhere – as she skipped across the rainbow bridge and threw herself at the not-too-surprised-by-the-gesture warrior.

"I've missed you!" She giggled as her noble warrior joined her hugging of arms with squeezing limbs of his own.  
"As I told you, friend." Thor was beside himself with pride and swagger – a private conversation obviously finding its way into his favor. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."

"What?"

"Ignore his teasing words." Balder suggested, returning her attention back to his eyes once again with the touch of her cheek.

"Let us return, I am famished!" Bimbo was off, dismissing everyone around him as if he were a king, and feeling the breeze fingering his luscious golden locks whilst trotting his horse towards the palace.  
"Come, ride with I."

"Eh." Kari froze, lower lip braced nervously between her teeth as she looked from Balder to his patiently waiting steed. "No I… think I'd much rather walk."  
"You will be quite safe I assure."

"Yeah, I heard that from you before involving a horse."

"The circumstances are dissimilar, I will be riding with you this time and we have a saddle." He was so sure about everything as if he held the power of divinity.

"Oh, I am so reassured that your my little pony won't freak out and throw me off the side of the universe." She sure as hell knew better than to trust anything, especially cocky warriors, when a horse was involved.

"You do not trust I?" He looked hurt, faltering internally at her lack of belief in his resolve to protect her from danger.

"No I…" Kari swallowed hard, hating the disparaging look in her man friend's eyes. "I don't trust the horse."

"I give you my word, on my honor, I will not allow you to be thrown."

"But… oh…" She squirmed much like a small child in need of the potty. "Alright but… if something does go wrong, promise you won't let Loki save me from it. I don't think I can live down anymore of his crap."  
"I do not think it would be wise to agree to such terms." Balder shook his head in a determined, yet scolding, sort of way. "Your life is more important than your pride. To myself at least."  
"Oh god, don't lecture me right now. I'm happy to see you so let's not ruin it. Just help me up onto this… monster of yours."  
"As you wish."

Though she could not see him, her back turned to him as he helped her up into the saddle, she could psychically feel the satisfied grin plastered on his face. Stupid horse, stupid Balder bringing a horse and stupid her for letting him convince her to get on his stupid horse.

"Woah horsie, good horsie, ok…" She was shaking, unsteady on the complacent and hardly moving mare but soon reassured by the presence climbing into the space behind her.

Her cheeks flushed lightly, the desire to ask if it was his armor or whether he was just happy to see her flashing through her mind as a good conversation starter. Still, Heimdall was only a few feet away, star gazing in his usual manner and really that sort of talk could wait until Balder was a little less 'proper' around her. Actually, being a good boy was most likely his actual personality rather than a façade – he was not the mask type of fellow. Maybe he could be perverted at least.


	54. Chapter 54: Red with green bits

It was quiet, perhaps a little too quiet and all together making Loki feel uncomfortable. His ball and chain pet was never this docile unless unconscious and even then she snored like an asgardian warrior sleeping off a barrel of ale. He could not help but be suspicious as he watched sneakily over his teacup. She was chewing her lip, jaw shifting from side to side as she rested her cheek across her bracing palm. A quill twirled a sultry dance across the desk in her fingertips, a plate of cinnamon rolls left untouched by her side and the glistening eyes of one well rested searching out the lines of writing on the book in front.

What was she up to? The god of mischief shifted in his chair ever so casually, one leg switched from down low to over knee as he sipped from the lukewarm cup held between forefinger and thumb. He knew trouble when he saw it and Karian Motter reeked of the stuff at all hours.

"What, pray tell, has my typically impish servant such a pleasant resonance of silent and obedient?" He watched her with a predatory green gaze.

"Hmmm?"

The teacup was barely spared an unfortunate encounter with the overly polished floor below as the prince fought to maintain his grip on the handle and keep intact his neutral persona. That was not the hum of plotting thoughts, more so the wistful sigh of a woman in love. Balder, he was back in the palace was he not? Who else would she be so abruptly mentally consumed by? Certainly not Heimdall any longer.

"I believe I ordered you to desist from seeing that noble bore whilst under my employ." Loki's tone could of sheered sheep of their wooly coats with how quick and snappish it sounded.

"Hmmm?" Kari casually flipped to the next page of her book only distantly aware of the trickster's company.

"Answer with words not sounds!" He rejoined, teacup steadied on his desk before he found time to have a little accident. "Are you a beast or a woman?"

"Oh, what's got your dick out now Loki? I'm reading the stupid book!"

"The case may be so but do you retain any words but your lovers?"

"My lovers? Oh, that's what you're all freaking out over." She giggled, turning in her chair to give him her full attention and the benefit of a woman's wisdom. "Look, I'm sure there are plenty of lovely court prostitutes and wenches that would love to be hanging off your arm if you were just a little nicer to them and-"

"Enough!" He barked, slamming his fist down on the surface between them and startling his pupil into a disinterested eye roll. "Stupid mortal hussy!"

"I think your insults are getting lamer, perhaps I should get you a thesaurus for your birthday. How old are you anyway? Fourteen? A hundred and fourteen? I'm sure there's a fourteen in there somewhere, you certainly act like a teenage dick."

"Motter!" The god of mischief sucked in a soothing breath as he leaned back into his chair; all the better to steady his resolve. "There are but three days until you are pitted against your enemy, where your life will be on the line," he lifted a hand to silence his companion from her mouth widening imminent retort, "and you wish to spend your final hours consorting with a man so lost in his own thoughts of another that he could never care for you beyond a reminding shadow? Whatever you may think, I am the only one within this realm trying to keep you safe and all I ask in return is that you do as you are told."

"Loki… you're the one that got me into this trouble by betting with your bimbo brother so kindly shove it." She leaned forward to retain the less than breeching gap between them, expanded by his retreat, and threw in a few wide arching hand gestures for emphasis. "And as for Balder… what are you even talking about? We have fun; he's nice to me. It's nice to have someone being nice to me around here. Why the hell are you always trying to stop me from having a moment of…" She trailed off; could it be? He was certainly behaving in a peculiar manner even for Loki the lying dick princlet. "Are you in love with me?"

"Do not delude yourself with such fanciful thinking, woman."

"Have I hit a nerve?" She was leaning back into her chair now - equal parts terrified caution and plotting bemused. "You really are like a teenage boy aren't you?" A loud bout of chortling escaped between her upturned lips as her body went like partially set jelly under the influence of an intoxication called hilarity. "You like a girl so you try to get her attention by being a dick? Oh this is precious."  
"If you are quite finished with your daydreaming I expect a working demonstration of that which you have learned from reading today?" He was up onto his feet, clothes straightened with a tired exhale of boredom and reproach directed at his sniggering, barely house broken, mortal.

"What?" Well that ruined her fun – a pop quiz. "Argh, I've not finished the book."  
"It hardly matters if you read it or not, not once have I seen you demonstrate either practical ability or knowledge after finishing a single tome."  
"Then why do you keep making me read them?"  
"One can live in hope that wisdom will finally penetrate your moronic defenses."  
"Repeating the same mistake over and over is a sign of insanity you know."

"And how you test me." Woe was Loki's life, forced to interact with such inferiority.  
"What's this?" Kari glared at the glass holder placed in front of her filled with a deep red wax.

"Truly? You no not of candles?" He was skeptical of her intelligence in general but even this seemed beyond her normal ridiculousness.

"Don't be… I know what a candle is!" Really? Seriously? Could he possibly be stupid enough to think she did not know what a candle was? "What I don't know is why you put it in front of me."

"That should be obvious." He leaned forward, sleeve tickling the side of her cheek as he plucked on the wick in the centre of the candle and straightened it to face upwards. "You will light the wick with your knowledge of fire magic."  
"Hah! Now who is delusional? I don't have knowledge of fire magic!"

Loki went silent, keeping his eyes fixed on her as he picked up the book on her desk and turned it over so the front was showing. There was a pregnant pause as Kari looked from the trickster to the book cover then to the candle in a series relay without fault – an Olympic winner. With a triumphant smirk, he tapped on the title in large gold letters on the cover, which only made his apprentice frown as he dug the knife in a little deeper.

All right fine, she had been reading a book on fire magic all morning but how was she supposed to know that? Stupid Loki, stupid books, stupid candles, stupid fire magic and stupid Loki always being right about important things.

"I hate you." She ground out beneath a rather sulky looking scowl.  
"I know." He simply agreed sauntering his escape off towards the bookshelves. "Light the candle, Motter."  
"I don't even know how!"

"Use the word for fire."

"You know, the main reason all my spells go to crap?" She continued to frown at his back, her words hindering his getaway with a forehead-rubbing groan – almost a month solidly teaching was starting to wear even him out.

"Because you are incompetent."

"No." She did not like the way he phrased, what should have been a question, rhetorically. "Because I don't understand this stupid word thing. Why can't I just say 'fire'? Fire means fire!"

"Only from your limited point of view." He sighed, about turning to slide back into his chair for a conversation most five year olds should have already mastered. "You understand of course every living thing is made of three equal parts?"

"Err, like a mind, body, spirit festival? They do really nice wheat grass smoothies there and all this amazing-"

"Motter."

"Right yeah, living stuff, three things." She counted to four on her fingers.  
"For your intellectually diminished sake," he held up his hand to hold at bay the angry red in her eyes about to spill from her mouth, "let us refer to them as mind, body and spirit. The word 'fire' is merely a description. A shell, the body of fire given name. Without the other two aspects it is an incomplete being with form but lacking in power and behavior."

"Wait. Fire is alive?"

"Everything is alive to some degree, Motter." He nodded as the hamster wheels in his pupil's brain started to turn.

"My chair's alive?"

"Motter."

"I'm serious." Kari groaned, stamping her foot to release some of the frustration of being spoken to like a naughty schoolgirl retaking mathematics for the fifth time. "Alright fine. Blah blah blah, alive, three things, fire is body. So this word in this book is its soul?" They both nodded in unison, Loki's expression hooded by the concentration he was putting into studying her every little contemplating flutter of movement. "And it's brain is what? Scientific Latin talk for combustion?"

"Combustion is a description of its behavior." Even he had to take a moment to sound impressed she managed that leap on her own.

"Ooh, I'm smart today."

"I think not. Hazily intellectually challenged, a step above fatuous."

"I am not fat!"

"Karian Motter." He could not help but express amusement, as her uncomplicated augmentation, arose with such a cascade of humorous misunderstanding.

"No, stop laughing at me! You called me fat!"

"On my honor-"

"No, la la la, not listening!" She slammed her hands over her ears to block his prince of asgard oath making. Did he seriously think she was going to listen to his lies?  
"Light the candle, Motter." He spoke softly, prying her hands from her ears despite her warning glare – all the better to hear him.  
"Fine." She ground out betwixt a nostril flaring pout though almost instantly distracted by a flash of thought brought about by firing neurons – or perhaps the tingle of his hands clasped around her wrists. "Loki? Why is it only the soul word works in magic?"

"To control a living things soul is to have absolute power over it. Where the soul leads, the mind and body must follow."

"So it's slavery?" A strange sense of foreboding trickled up her spine like thawing ice, a haunted look not unnoticed by her wizarding master.

"Think of it as indentured servitude." He placated, releasing his grip on her body and taking a step back to redeem breathing room.  
"No, no, it's slavery." She shook her head, recovering a defiant streak to her countenance. "I'm kind of well acquainted with slavery you know." Her brow knitted, gaze darting to the right as she inhaled a new wave of thought out of the predators cage. "I don't get why I can't just ask fire nicely to bring its body and stuff over and have a party on the wick. You know, nice like. Well, maybe you wouldn't know…"

"Magic is not diplomacy. It is a strategy of acquiring and moving your pieces where you need them to be."

"Like cluedo?" Kari grinned, raising an eyebrow of interest at the prince's words.

"Like checkers." He corrected with authority.

"I prefer cluedo. It has tiny weapons in it and a ballroom and people named after colours."

There was a moment of silence – possibly to commemorate the death of some of Loki's brain cells – blue eyes staring blissfully ignorant at speechless green. The silly girl liked tiny weapons and people named after colours. What more was there to say on the subject? Nothing, no absolutely nothing. He was just going to turn around, walk away from this and read a book.

"Light the candle, Motter."  
"'Light the candle, Motter.'" She repeated mockingly behind his back as the prince disappeared into the wilderness of literature.

Kari flopped back into her chair with a hearty groan. Being a wizards apprentice was far too much hard work and reading – especially when Loki was the one in charge of her every waking moment. She could not recall the last day she had to herself, a few hours here and there between the god of mischief's preoccupation was the best she could manage in the way of a social life. She could not believe how long it took him to figure out Balder was back and most definitely hovering around her scene. Three days to go, three days until either death or victory. If she should pray to a god for divine intervention then why not worship at Balder the brave's temple.

Chuckling at the thought, Kari drooped across her desk and clucked her tongue suspiciously at the unlit candle in front of her nose. This was definitely not like the Hogwarts books. Sitting up a little straighter, cheek resting once again on her upturned palm, she turned her attention to the task at hand. What was that stupid word in the book again?

"Chen-nuh." She repeated what she believed to be the pronunciation revealed in chapter one of the book of fire. "Chen-nuh." Nothing was happening, not even a spark or something. "Chen-nur?" A bit of an accent could not hurt. "Chun-nur?" Still nothing, no smoke, no flames, no essence of cherry stinking up the place. "Chun-noor?" What was Loki doing with a cherry scented candle anyway? "Chen-nuoh?" Maybe he was gay after all. "Fire?" Or maybe it was one of his girlfriends. "Chen-nuh-fire-combustion?" Plausible, but Loki was into surprisingly fabulous items. "Cha-cha-chan-nuh?" Argh, what was the point of all this? "Stupid candle. I bet you're one of those fake ones and that dick is just teasing me." Kari groaned, pushing away from the desk to pout in her chair with arms crossed. "What am I supposed to do with this anyway? Light some scented candles and run my opponent a hot bath? Yeah, that'll defeat him. Maybe we can hold hands, skip through fields of sunflowers and sing show tunes. We could plait each other's hair and make daisy chains. Whatever, I never wanted to be Hermione Granger anyway." She slouched further into her chair, picking up the quill on her desk mid-slide. "Chen-nuh." She tried again with the swish of her feather wand to no avail.

It was pointless, she did not want to be here doing this and Loki knew it. How could he expect her to put in the effort when she was miserable? Sure, her life was on the line but that was hardly an incentive when a boy was involved. Balder was probably out in the yard at the moment, sweaty man chest glistening under the afternoon sun, as he played with his sword topless. That was certainly a nice mental image.

Why was Loki always calling her fat anyway? She was hardly big, or at least Balder certainly did not seem to mind if she had the odd squishy bit. Maybe it was the mischief-makers way of trying to make her cry. He liked making girls cry it would seem.

She stared at the quill in her hands, running a finger along the length of the feather until the natural build up of grease on her skin began to cause protein strands to stick together. The quill was certainly starting to look sorry for itself by the time she was done stroking it. With a giggle, however, Kari was up on her feet and skirting the edges of bookshelves in search of her prey. He was standing besides a selection of geography books, flicking absentmindedly through the pages of an atlas, when she came upon him. It was too far of an open spaced stretch to sneak up on the trickster from her hiding spot but still a prank was called for. If only she were a real sorcerer, or at least knew something other than how to turn someone's clothing to wax from a distance. Well she did know a couple of fictional spells at least.

"Crucio." She whispered, flicking her quill in the prince's direction only to witness his casual 'hmm' at a particularly interesting location in his book. "Expelliarmus." She tried again with a continuing no effect. "Aw come on, it can't all be fake. Expelliarmus!" She gave it a little more feeling and volume; granting her a peculiar green-eyed look over her intended victims book. Perhaps he would have said something, or merely continued to stare until she felt uncomfortable and left, but with the amount of focused concentration she was putting into mumbling 'come on, please' to the air around her, things got a little bit distracting. "Expelliarmus!"

A rather unexpected gust of wind suddenly shot upwards between Loki's hands taking with it the atlas. Following the books ascent, he raised an eyebrow in curious wonder as it collided with the ceiling with a loud 'womp' then darted backwards as the hardback narrowly missed his person during its descent. The books spine was broken from the dual impacts, Loki's considering gaze following a steady path from the crash site to his hunched over pupil in the throws of snorting laughter.

"Motter-" He began his address only to find the woman in question scarpering out of sight - under the recognition she were no doubt in trouble.

Escape was never an easy achievement from someone like Loki however. Before Kari could even make it back to the centre of the library, or find a safe place to hide, the illusion specialist shimmered into existence ahead of her. The collision had been expected, his hands latching onto her shoulders and holding her prisoner. No escape, despite her squealing, shocked, stumbling attempt at shaking free.

"Get off all ready!" Kari whined pulling on her captor's arms as if it might possibly help release her.

"Calm yourself and explain as to what occurred."

"It was just wizard junk from a kids book. Disarm your opponent with expilliarmus."  
"That is hardly a word of power." He sighed. "It sounds reminiscent of latin."

"Whatever, just let go. You're hurting."

"Explain this." He spoke slowly, releasing his hold fractionally, attempting not to spook his pet. "If you have mastery of something stronger than what little else I have seen from you, then it is imperative we use this to our advantage."  
"'We', 'our', suddenly we're a team? Are you fighting with me?"

"Motter." Loki snapped his fingers in front of her nose, refocusing her attention with a frown of annoyance that soon melted into a relenting shoulder slump.

"Urgh, I don't know." She rolled her eyes, arms folding in a mutinous manner.  
"Think carefully." He soothed, fingers tracing the side of her cheek causing an attentive surprise from the recipient. "What did you do? What were you doing?"

Kari shrugged, chewing her lip absentmindedly as her focus split into two separate lines of thinking – his placating touch and provocative question. What had she been doing? Pretending to be a wizard. Right that bit was clear but it was not working at first especially with the pain curse thingy. So, what did she do? Made the book go up before crashing down. Well that was a no brainer. Maybe, or maybe not, no, probably, definitely she had been concentrating pretty hard on the thought of wanting to knock the book out of his hand. She was pretty sure she was not telekinetic or whatever though. What else? Well, maybe her asking something nicely had worked even if stupid Loki liked to believe there was no room for diplomacy in magic. She could persuade people and spiders to do stuff sometimes. Could you persuade a book to jump up into the air and-

"Persuasion."

"Hey! Are you reading my mind?" She squirmed uncomfortably at his sudden outburst. "Loki 'Mischief' Odinson! Has your mother taught you no manners? You can't just walk into a woman's head uninvited!"  
"Clearly, I can."  
"I don't care! Get your hand off me." Furious, she slapped his hand away from her cheek. "My god, what next? Visit my dreams?" Her eyes grew wide as the god of mischief gave a short-lived toothy grin. "Loki!"  
"An argument for another day, Motter." He dismissed the subject nonchalantly. "I believe I understand my fathers interest in keeping you among us clearer now."

"Oh god, how many times have you been wandering around in my head? Every time I see someone with green eyes, is that you?"

"Motter."

"Because that is sooo wrong."

"I apologise for your imaginative dreams."  
"Whatever." She scowled, turning her back on the apologetic prince somewhat aware there was something misleading about the admission of guilt.

"Persuasion is typically a trait of gods and demi-gods. An ability to use a piece without the need to place a harness on it."

"Say what?"

"You can utilize something without needing it's word-"

"I got that bit. Did you say I'm like a god?" Kari snorted into life a disbelieving chuckle. "Seriously? You're losing it Loki."

"My statement was of 'typical' traits in relations to gods and demi-gods. You hardly apply to either. Perhaps you are some form of lower level throw-back through Fandral's ancestry."  
"My grandfather's a god?"

"Your grandfather is a drudge and a braggart."

"Still better than your dad. Kidnapping girls, breaking promises and oaths and stuff. I bet my grandfather could take your dad in a clean sword fight." She scowled as the tricksters took a moment to enjoy the imagery of his charges fantasy. "Why are you laughing?"

"There is no end to the amusement you bring."

"Just you wait till I bring the pain!"  
"It sounds excruciating." He responded flatly. "As for your study-"

"I know, I know. 'Light the candle, Motter.'"

"Clearly you have retained nothing from the tome on mind control and telepathy."

"The brain juice book? I know how to make a decent smoothie from it."

"I highly doubt your words." His skepticism rolled out flatly.

"A liar calling a liar a liar… wait, a liar calling a liar a… a liar calling a non-liar-"

"We shall use your ability to persuade to our advantage."

"There's that 'we' again." She groaned despite the fact he was hardly paying her mind any longer.

"I assume, by the gust I felt, you were able to utilize the air around us to propel the atlas skywards."

"Makes sense I guess. Air is like floaty molecules looking to fill spaces and spread outward. When one moves or expands when heated it's a cascading effect onto all the neighbours like one car hitting another, causing it to jerk forward and hit the one in front. And if you, like, knock a load to the side the ones behind will swell into the empty space to fill it up causing wind. Long as you put some energy into it, air will be your slutty state of matter."  
"Despite the careless wording and odd analogies, your explanation is not entirely inaccurate."  
"Yeah well… I was a waitress for nearly ten years. The only people that normally work as waitresses are people studying to get degrees in need of extra money for books and stuff. And they always babble on about their projects and essays and whatever." Kari shrugged with an irritated look radiating from her features. "Can't even get drunk after work without having to hear about the Galilean invariance or the drifting of Gondwana in the Ordovician period."  
"Discontinue speaking." Loki also wore the mask of irritation, though, whether it was from her babbling or subject matter, taking nicks out of his opinion on the mortal, was a topic for old scholars to discuss.

Still, for the rest of the day and the next, the god of mischief moved their lessons outside onto the fields. It was a bit chilly, being December, and she could not go and play with the band of children lurking down by the river but at least the scenery and fresh air was a distracting change from a month cooped up in the library. Of course, being kept so far away from the palace, from dawn to dusk, meant she could not so much as catch a glimpse of Balder either but that also seemed to be part of Loki's plan. At least it would be all over soon with the added bonus of not having to see the prince for a long time if ever. She was getting given back to waitressing after this ordeal right?

The final day, before all the impending doom stuff, the leash was still firmly in place despite being back at the palace once more. Loki called it a day of battle plan discussion but really it was hanging out in his rooms whilst he was fitted for a new year celebration designer outfit. Some people really had it all. Her muscles were aching anyway from all the magic, sword and persuasion practice in the fields – not to mention all the no-bars held sparring with the green-eyed beast. He may have healed the broken bones but the bruises and her pride still hurt.

Perhaps it was because her life was coming to an end tomorrow or the fact, for the first time in weeks, she was doing nothing to occupy her mind from thinking about it, but finally everything felt as if it was catching up in one giant swoop. Kari sighed, drooping herself across the prince's comfy canapé as she watched him standing with his back to her and arms spread wide with a seamstress fixing his green and gold sleeves into place. He was talking; something about not getting pinned down but all she could muster was the occasional 'hmm' of agreement.

By the time all the tailoring was complete, Loki swishing back and forth as he viewed himself in a floor length mirror, it was already late afternoon. He need not turn and look to know she was asleep – the gentle nasal sounds were a dead give away – but that did not stop his feign of sighing annoyance as he sauntered across the room draping an unwanted cloak across the messy tangle of Motter. Seamstress dismissed, new clothing removed and hung away ready for glorious partying, the god of mischief continued an ordinary routine of bathing, eating and lounging with a book.

It was dark outside when Kari awoke, a fire burning off to her right mixing the room in shades of amber light. She hissed at the cramping of joints, unmoved in hours but awkwardly placed, and tried to stretch out beneath the deep green cloak over her. Where was she again? Right, Loki's rooms with the man-god in question, reclining cozy in an extra comfy looking armchair with added uncomfy looking horn adornments. What a dangerous diva-chair. All he really needed now was a white cat to pet in place of the book.

His gaze shifted from one page then to the other as she continued to study him. The entire, nothing to do thinking, finally having simmered down to a crescendo of blankness. It was strangely relaxing watching the ordinarily devious actor caught seemingly unaware being natural in his own surroundings. How quiet he was and how so like a wildlife documentary this felt.

He turned the page, pausing to lightly lick his finger to help with the task before something seemed to arise as amiss. Kari blinked in his silent stare, cheek braced comfortable on a cushion and body too warm to risk venturing from beneath her covering.

"I surmised you required rest for tomorrows impending battle and let you sleep." He answered the unasked question though whom had asked it neither were sure.  
"Do you think I'll actually win?" There was a quietness to her tone that sought reassuring, like a small child, and did he oblige with an adoring smile.

"I know you shall."

"Self-important, believe in yourself, psychology aside, do you really think I can beat this guy?" She tried again, searching out honesty and finding it in the slip of his lip from skyward to flat. "Well that was a sobering pep-talk." Brows knitting in worry, she fought against the urge to remain still and began to sit. "I'm gonna get something to eat and go to bed."

"Wait." The prince commanded but the man requested as he rose ahead of her attempts to shake loose from her covers and reappeared carrying a tray neatly deposited on her half laying lap.

"Dinner in canapé, how very thoughtful of you. Now I really want some crackers and cheese." She fiddled with the plate of untouched cold foods, obviously having been brought especially for her if the amount of pastries and honey brazened ham cuts were anything to go by. "You haven't licked any of this have you?"  
"It would not be the first time you have sampled my saliva." Loki chuckled politely, resuming his seating across from his guest with little inkling to divulge his secrets. "I doubt it would deter you from eating at any rate."

"Oh how well you know me." Kari snorted grabbing a hand full of pastry intent on having her desert before dinner. "Going to have everybody talking about me again when I walk out of here with bed hair. And could you seriously stop spreading rumours about me being a whore." She half garbled through a mouthful of mixed foods hardly stopping the intake of such for long enough to breathe. "I haven't even gotten laid since earth. I'm miserable enough."  
"Is that a request?"

"No thanks, I don't need a pity fuck, especially not from you."

"What a shame and with the evening so dull to think we could have made it more interesting."

"You're weird you know that." She shook her head with an amused grin, teasing with the idea of dipping cinnamon rolls in savoury red sauce with green bits just for the experiment of it.

"From a creature as strange as you are, Motter, that is practically calling someone perfectly ordinary."

"And you hate to be thought of as ordinary don't you mister big bad mischief maker."

"I have never prescribed to being big or bad but if you desire a demonstration I am sure I can prove to you that even a lowly dragonfly as I can triumph over a dragon."  
"Oh god, you're not still sore about that are you?" What was with Loki tonight? Perhaps making her laugh with innuendo was his way of cheering her up before a death sentence. "It was a joke. You were being a gigantic dick and needed putting back in your place."  
"And you believe you are the one who needs to 'put me in my place'?" He leaned a little forward in his chair, chin resting atop his knuckles as he rested his elbow on the armrest to scrutinise the devouring mess in front of him playfully.

"I don't see anyone else stepping up to the mark. You don't even listen to your mother half the time."

"You wish to be my mother now, Motter?"  
"What? No!" She gave a shudder filled sideways glance before chewing down on some seriously yummy ham.

"Then the next best thing? My wife?"

"Oh hell no!" That had her attention with a spluttering ham coughing disturbance.  
"And here I was under the assumption it was every little girls dream to be a princess and marry a prince." Loki gave an over dramatic sigh of woe – as if his very dreams had been torn asunder.  
"I've seen those Disney movies and I don't have run away from daddy issues or a man-beast to tame…" Kari paused thinking on that last bit a little harder. "Alright I don't want to tame you. There isn't even any singing teapots to convince me it's a good idea."  
"Finish your meal." He hummed with amusement and the shake of his head before relaxing back into his seat once more. "I shall see about the teapots later."

"I take it back. You're not weird, you're creepy." She frowned at him, a mixture of confusion and over thinking the conversation having a detailed debate in her head. "And Balder is not Gaston. I've not seen him singing about or eating ten dozen eggs."

"Of course."  
"Stop smirking. I'm going to bed before you give me anymore ammunition for nightmares."  
"Rest well, Motter." He watched with a continuing grin as she left an interesting mess of crumpled cloak, crumbs and cutlery on his canapé.  
"Ffff-yeah, whatever Locket."  
"What did you call me?" His attention was immediate and intent causing her to slow her steps towards the exit and palm her forehead from a very sudden headache.

"Locket, because your name is…I uh… I… I don't know. I'm half asleep."

"So I see."

He remained seated as she rubbed her temples but divulged no more, hesitantly rising from his chair only when the door had closed behind her. Crossing the room, Loki paused at a cabinet, unlocking a single draw with a concealed key and opening it to display the solitary item within. It was still there, though its behaviour had changed. He reached in, fingers careful, gentle with the delicate globe as he brought it out into the light and watched the blizzard inside calming its activity in his palm. It was the proximity, it had to be, and she had been close to it all day.

A tired sigh escaped the trickster's lips, fingers spraying the snow globe's chain wide enough to place over his head before tucking the keepsake safely against his chest.


	55. Chapter 55: Conflict and kisses

Light had begun to filter in through the window, bypassing the lazily drawn curtains to spray speckles of gold in a progressing stream growing in length across the cluttered floor. As the sun warmed her cheek, catching at the corner of her eye, Kari exhaled a worn out sigh of mixed regret and relief. Regret of failing to study harder and relief the sleepless night was finally over. The hours of staring at the ceiling carried the price of dark rings like such unwanted baggage under her eyes and a light buzzing in the back of her head pleading for unconsciousness. No time for dawdling, she needed a bath and to make her self look pretty for perhaps her last day on – well this was not earth but the thought still counted.

A groan of tight limbs and trepidation escaped her down turned lips as Kari found her legs lost under sheets for a moment before managing the shivering scuttle of morning displeasure towards the bathroom. A long bath, throw in some extra smelly stuff Fandral kept around like some sort of pre-mating musk and a thorough scrub until pink and quite clean. No point in living your life as if you have nine more waiting – she was hardly a griffin shaped puss-cat after all.

A fancy looking practical outfit was in need today; wooly leggings, that would keep her warm. Green tunic? No, she did not want to walk in looking like she was wearing one of Loki's snot coloured outfits; it was bad enough he sort of kind of owned her in a completely illegal for the twenty-first century kind of way. A vest and a v-neck plum jumper – it was cold outside and she really did not need to be dying chilly today; on another note, she probably needed to stop thinking so much about dying as well. A hat? No. Yes. Maybe. Actually, by the look of the grey clouds outside, definitely yes. There was still a grey wool one somewhere in her old clothes and some nice practical shoes.

She paused, horrified as a pair of uggs emerged from her suitcase and had to take a moment to squint and wonder why she ever brought such ugly things with her. To the corner of shame, where dirty underwear and toenail clippings vanish forever into an unwanted pit of disgrace. A pair of bright orange canvas shoes with a psychedelic green chameleon wrapped around the sides would do. They sort of matched the outfit, in a very obnoxious and contrasting manner. Oh well, they were comfy and that was all that really mattered, that and her make-up, oh and her sword. Where had that sharp pointy danger to asgardian guards gotten too now? That was it, think positive, she was going to stab some stranger to death in a ring of fire whilst Loki and Thor drank tea and talked about the weather. All right maybe that was a bit far into pep-talk imagination but she was really tired and had hardly slept after all.

Yawning, Kari frog marched out of her room ready for battle and appearing like a sleepy winter-prom-queen-Olympian – it was basically the look she was going for. Something made her pause however; muddy boots by the door accompanied by the stench of prolonged exposure to sweaty man feet. Fandral was back. Her grandfather was home, most likely sleeping in his room after returning at some point during the night. She stood, transfixed by the footwear, before unhurriedly bending down to pick up the left boot in order to examine it more carefully. These boots had seen a lot, adventure, danger and good times over the past month and so forth but he was home now. She felt saddened by the thought, a moment of excitement and a sense of almost relief at his return suddenly darkened by other realizations. What exactly could he do to help her with the predicament two princes had placed her in? If she went in there and woke him up now, no doubt, he would most likely be forced under some grandfatherly duty to come and watch her impending battle. She did not need the added stress of his audience, the knowledge he would watch her die like a weak embarrassment upon his lineage.

The boot dropped from her hands, a dulled 'thunk' from its connection with the ground followed by the click of a door opening and closing in swift succession. Kari sniffled, dabbing away a light stream of tears that threatened to make her mascara run – she could not have that happening and ruining her day.

"I had not expected to discover you conscious and collected." Who needed running mascara when you had Loki to come and ruin your day?

"Hoping to dress me yourself?" Her tone was snappish, muscles tight and agitated as she fought not to give him the satisfaction of eye contact.  
"My input would surely have improved drastically upon your choices." He sighed melodramatically with an added 'tsk' of disapproval at her attire causing her to frown and flash the trickster a wounded gaze. "Come, a decent morning meal is required for the days activities."  
"I can get my own." She squirmed out of his one armed clutch about her shoulders, fighting away from the direction of the hall he was trying to maneuver her towards, in order to stalk apathetically in the direction of the kitchens in protest.

He could stand there in the corridor on his own all he wanted. Shunned and- He really was the biggest ruiner of days known to the universe. Kari paused mid-step scowling over her shoulder at the empty space where Loki should have been standing looking hurt and put off at her antics. The bastard had just carried on nonplussed to go get his food as if she had never existed.

"Dick." She mouthed, distracted with an eye roll by her stomach growling for promised gastronomy.

How could anyone feel so alone whilst surrounded by such a crowd of noisy, occupied people occasionally nudging her as they passed. The kitchen was in full swing, cooks cooking, waitresses waiting and pink-faced maids trying to keep everything clean to no avail. She ate solemnly in a corner, legs drawn up to her chest as she tried to keep out of the way and chewed unexcitedly upon the discarded strips of chicken from whatever pristine platter was being presented to Loki in the hall. That summed up their relationship pretty well; master and dog, told to heel, sit and roll over on command then fed table scraps. If she survived today, a long rethinking about her life and the direction it was heading in was certainly in order. Who was she kidding, Karian Motter was hardly the career orientated type, serving others had always been what she was best at - just another gear in the mechanism.

Slinking out of the kitchen, irritated at finding she had no pockets to stick her hands in and look decidedly emo, Kari ventured forth through the palace doing something she really did not like doing – thinking. Indifferent guards marched around changing posts, a trio of court girls or prostitutes or something giggled past looking dreadfully excited about something and way too nice looking. Where did all these pretty asgardian girls come from? Why could she not have gotten some of those flawless skinned, smooth haired genes in the mix? A man's nose and her grandfathers blue eyes were hardly anything more than a booby prize in her opinion. Stupid genes, stupid grandfather, stupid attractive girls and stupid pocket less leggings.

Kari huffed leaning against a pillar and eyeing an equally stupid cat sun bathing on a bench. What a peaceful beast, big soft warm bundle of purrs that no longer frequented her bed. It really had been strange all this time without him and pillow cuddling hardly made up for the real thing. Well he was her feline husband after all; you never truly got over your first love.

Scampering across the garden path on her tiptoes, she snuck over to the sleeping cat barely giving a twitch of his whiskers at her approach and attacked his exposed belly with a spray of tickling fingers. Tawny eyes darted open, paws curving inward to halt the progression of digits amongst his fur as Griffin assessed the situation before a deep procession of purring issued from his chest. She giggled at the half lidded nature of the tabbies golden orbs, finding her hands now welcome to stroke and massage wherever she wished.

"Silly Griffin." She cooed, sliding onto the bench besides her fellow midgardian and scratching behind the dozing cats ears. "You've missed me right? Like I miss you?" She smiled at the continuing purrs, though the upturn of her lips was hardly at full mast. "Liar. You're like Loki really. Doing your own thing. You're hardly a loyal creature. I should have gotten one of those little handbag dogs. Hey! Where are you going?" She called after the retreating feline, scrambling to his feet and loping away into the bushes.  
"How endearing a friend you become, truly." She should have known, the looming shadow above her more than enough evidence to whom was gloating towards her. "To affront your only comrade and master collectively. An achievement with quite the ramifications."

"Go to hell Loki." She stood, dusting the back of her leggings down to be rid of dirt and flippant insults.

"What possible use would that serve? I have already visited the realm recently."

"Then stay there? Enjoy a good burning session? A bit of torture might do you good."  
"There is hardly much of such pleasures to enjoy in Hel." He was smirking with arms folded in a thoughtful manner - as if playing two sides of a coin. "You are anxious once more. I believed we had quelled such last night, we are prepared, failure is not accomplishable."

"Oh god, just shut up Loki!" The outburst, though building, had been unexpected as it left her lips and foot stamping combined; rushing waves of cascading anguish rising as red to her cheeks. "I really hate you right now. More than I normally do I mean! Why can't you just leave me out of your stupid grand plans and whatever? What have I done to deserve this? I don't want to go and fight some grizzly guard! He'll probably kill me in the first five seconds. No, no, he definitely will and it's all your fault!"

"Hush." He breathed besides her ear, pincer like arms wound tight around her body and pressing firm into an unyielding safety net.

"No…" She struggled uselessly, overpowered with every push back and forced to endure the hard nature of his armor against bare skin. "Get off…" It was a final waned angry plea before the relenting of her forehead drooping onto his chest with the added embarrassment of streaking tears. "Why are you such a dick?"

"I believed I was being kind to you now."

"It's all a lie." She gripped hold of his armour, fending off the tremble of fear snaking its way through her body as best she could. "I hardly think you know where the lies begin and end you just live inside a great big lying bubble of lies."

"Then I should remain far away from sharp objects in case, by chance, they may burst my bubble of lies."

"Don't make me laugh." She shook her head, chuckling at the mischief-makers straight-faced humour finding the arms cocooning her relaxed.

With a sigh, as if escaping a cage, Kari pushed away from her captives clutches in order to stare predatory green eyes down to her level. Instead, however, he caused her brow to knit in confusion, unable to read the mask of the trickster's features. What was he thinking about so severely? Probably the bout and his bet later today. Brotherly rivalry was worth other peoples lives apparently. Still, she found herself holding her breath in a mixture of shock and further bafflement, as his hands rose and fingers wiped away dark lines smudged under her eyes and across parts of her cheeks. Mascara really needed to come properly waterproof.

"Come, it is almost time." The depth of his voice reminded her to breathe.

What was that? And what was that coldness on her skin?

Squinting upwards, ignoring the trail of a departing hand running the length of her arm, Kari stared at the grey clouds disposing of pale coloured snowflakes in sparse abandonment. How pretty; the first sign of true winter the midgardian had ever seen in the golden realm of asgard but the tranquility was short lived. Fingers entwining with her own, the warmth between their palms held in a tight air bubble, as he led her from the gardens not unwillingly. This was it then. Suspense enough to kill almost over and then only the killing would remain. The blush in her cheeks, blood boiling to the surface of her skin from cold, dread, anticipation but also the touch of the prince, no, man leading her like a partner to the dance floor – though she would inevitably be left dancing with another. His footfalls were steady and clear, like a metronome balancing the internal struggle within her mind to a perfect equilibrium, her steps synchronizing to his example. What happened next was down to her now.

The training yard was eerily quiet as they entered; the horses stowed away with stable doors drawn to keep out the approaching snow. Kari looked up from her vigil of the ground surprised by what awaited. Fandral and Thor to the sides looking stern as if an argument had taken place and no clear winner was heralded. Balder was close behind, eyeing the two with suspicion and awaiting a need for his might to separate the friends. At the realization that eyes were suddenly focusing upon her Kari became acutely aware of herself and the hand locked with her own; breaking that contact with some determined speed. This was about to be humiliating enough without everyone thinking Loki and she were like a couple of seven-year-old lovebirds.

"Kari, my dear." Fandral was quick to react the second she was within range, pulling his granddaughter out of reach from the god of mischief and safely into his aura. "You should have come to me. This is downright madness!"

"It is hardly madness, my friend." Thor gave an aggravated and wholly unwelcome response.

"Should you still call me such when you intentionally endanger my daughters daughter?" How quick was her grandfather to push her to the side in order to better chest point with his frenemy.

"You are being unreasonable. How many times have we fought together and amongst ourselves. This is no different."

"You would not say such if I pitted your only child against a Bildshnipe unaided."

"You exaggerate the situation like a nursing mother."

"Woah, woah, woah!" Kari butted in, shocking the bickering couple into recalling her presence. "Did you just insinuate I'm a milk drinker? Really Thor?"

"I meant no-"

"No, no, no." She waved her hands in great sweeping circles to distract bimbo from his apology. "Your mouth was running but the drivers seat was empty. Big man with a hammer that thinks it's OK to make young inexperienced girls fight big guards is calling me the baby. Only in asgard!"

"I understand not your jibes." Thor scowled with an added huff of impatience. "Besides, why am I whole to blame for games that are both Loki and mine."

"Madness from Loki is as expectant as the sun shall shine, it is your folly that hails to the mountains of treachery." Fandral found his chance to leap back into the fray of words as Balder reached in between the two asgardians to retrieve the smaller, fragile, midgardian.

"Stay well clear of their disagreement." He coaxed her further back away from danger.

"You know it kind of involves me right?" Kari exhaled through her nose still rather caught up with the rush of adrenaline.

"Indeed you are right but I would not wish harm on you from either."

"I have to ask…" She rolled her eyes at the exhibit of manly hand gestures as Loki made the duo a trio of triangular debate. "Are they always this theatrical when arguing?"

"I know not of what you mean." Balder's gaze was that of one genuinely lost amongst her words.

"Urgh, never mind." Deflated, she leaned in against his side tugging his arm up and over to drape across her shoulder – not as if he would ever make the first move himself. "I'm glad you're here though."

"I cannot aid you in battle." He drew her in tighter though his eyes remained focused on the melodramatic antics ahead.

"Yup, I got that part. Maybe you could stow me in your helmet or something and get me out of the city though?"

"You wish for I to aid you in fleeing like a coward?" That got his undivided attention.

"Noooo, think of it like tactical retreating." She bit her lip with a pleading grin.

"You are always of amusement, Kari Fandralkin." Balder chuckled quietly returning to his vigil gaze.

"Uh, yeah, I hear that a lot for some reason." She rolled her eyes, sighing into a whisper. "Hmmm, even when I am being serious..."

"Your opponent arrives."

"Huh?"

Kari arced her neck around to get a better look at the heavily armoured guard traipsing across the yard. The goliath was fixated on the sky, tense and unsure of the progressing snowfall but soon collected as his great hulking boots brought him to a stand still in front of both princes and impassioned member of the warriors three. Actually, it was somewhat curious the rest of the trio were not here in support of Fandral but with the amount of drinking they often partook in, it was not unreasonable to think they would be hung-over somewhere this early in the morning. Wait a second, that guard was really familiar looking - especially when he gave her that indifferent look of displeasure. Where had she seen him before?

There was a lot of scowling going on between the two combatants even as they merely approached to greet one another. By the look of 'oh god not her again' written all over his face he definitely recognized her too. Wait! Oh no, it could not be. Could it?

"I know you!" She practically squealed, huge grin plastered across her face as the guard looked away ashamedly. "You used to babysit me back when I first arrived." The guard said nothing, merely continuing to admire something across the yard to their left. "As talkative as ever I see."

"Let us begin so we may return inside out of this repulsive cold." Thor boomed drawing his cloak around him as a shield against the onslaught of white flakes. "The winner shall be the first to draw blood or cause their opponent to forfeit, no death blows. Are these rules acceptable for you, brother?"

"If they are a must." Loki shrugged his agreement nonchalantly whilst Fandral shot both princes disapproving glares.

"Very well, begin when ready." Bimbo waved off the bias looking pair and retreated towards the palace wall for what little shelter it brought.

Well, this was going a lot better than she had hoped. Before the match had even begun, the murder rule had been ruled out; then again the look Loki was giving her, joined by his previous threats, losing might bring about a worse misfortune. The guard stalked off across the yard finding himself a place to stand ready within the training ring. A pat on her back, which she had half expected to be Loki's, jolted her out of the deep breathing reverie she was lost within. Fandral shot her a stern look, shaking her shoulder with a determined nod. She definitely needed to win, her grandfather's honour or whatever was not going down with her too.

Raking in a deep exhale and releasing it as mist in the air, Kari strolled out onto the battlefield pausing a safe distance from her opponent. The guard stared her down; intimidating her with his eyes alone as they both drew their weapons. As if on queue there was a shout in the distance that could only be her grandfather's issuing a demand for her to raise her elbow. Would he ever stop with that? She knew about her stupid elbow. Yelling about it all the time was not going to help in this situation especially when it distracted her-

"Woah!" Kari half tripped to her right as a blade came out of seemingly nowhere.

She had not expected the bout to start so soon, were they not supposed to be both ready for it? No use in crying about it now.

Grounding her feet, she lifted her elbow blocking the next two blows from her opponent. He was playing with her now, his attacks hardly more than half strength as if he were trying to prolong the match or test her defenses. Whatever he was doing, it gave her a chance to think for a moment as she moved backwards taking the guard in a chasing circle around the field. A stupid piece of debris got in the way, however, her retreating dance halted very suddenly as she squealed and tripped onto her back. Of course, the guard was quick to pounce, pace quickened and blade already hurtling downwards as he jumped forward to take advantage of her misfortune. Her eyes were wide, sword forgotten at her side as she stared up in terror at the impending failure approaching. The guard jolted, caught unaware as his blade connected with air and the image of Karian Motter vanished before his eyes.

He was on his guard now; weapon raised to the ready, as he turned rapidly around the arena seeing that nobody was there. Where had she gone? What trickery was this? Left, right, nothing, no one. He strained for sound, to hear approaching footsteps but the snowfall blanketed and confused his senses. A touch of mist in the air, light, almost unseen but an indication of a presence breathing to his right. Feigning ignorance, he continued to look around carefully at his surroundings but kept his other senses on high alert.

Heat, an imminent body at his back, the hair on his neck rising at the sensation as his arm flew out with the twist of his body and grabbed tight on something that squirmed and screamed. His weapon was already on route, following the momentum of his form as she rematerialized held awkwardly by her hair and unable to bring her sword up to defend his next attack. Instinct took over as he yanked her forward towards danger but instead of struggling she followed his lead, as ice grew thick around her free arm, just enough to repel his blade before shattering, and twirled on the spot knotting her hair in his grip to bring her sword back into play forcing him onto the defense. He released his grip, bending backwards to dodge her blow but even that could not prevent the gust of wind from knocking him off his feet.

Winded but still conscious, the guard moved to right himself but rapidly threw his weight back to the ground to block the in coming stab towards his jugular from his opponent. Kari was thrown clear by his responding strength, flipping terrifyingly in the air before landing with an uncomfortable 'oof' on her rear. Why could he not just go down and stay that way?

Whilst she was still yowling and hissing at the impact of frozen ground to butt cheeks a new collision forced her to think again about what hurt more throughout her body. Definitely the large asgardian pinning her thighs down.

Eyes taking a moment to gloat at his victory, Kari groaned out something that may or may not have been a pained 'fuck you' as he initiated his final move; pressing his blade to her chest. The part when the tip snapped off really made her laugh though. The guard gave a confused look at the strange colour of his weapon and made to stab his prisoner again making the sword shaped wax crumble further.

"Is that all you got?" She chortled at her enemy.

Probably not the best move, he was sitting on top of her after all and she being of the defenseless, own weapon out of reach to her right, kind of damsel in distress. The part when he tossed the useless wax-blade and motioned to give up and punch her in the face into submission made her very nervous. All that anxious build up was definitely going to hurt him a lot more than it hurt her however.

The wind suddenly picked up, the guard forced to pause to shield his eyes as snow pelted him in the face and the air itself tried to lift him up and off of his captive. What was this madness? Snow freezing into chunks of ice, gusts turning into raging winds until a blizzard blocked all from view. Someone was screaming and yelling, whether it was a man or woman was impossible to tell through the blanketing howl of the wind raging around the yard.

The spectators huddled together into a tighter band shocked and dismayed by the attacking nature of the weather around them. Cloaks lifted to fend off backlashes of ice managing to assault them through their casual shelter. Fandral on the other hand, being cloak less, tried his best to use Thor's larger form as a wind-guard. They were all very glad indeed when the storm started to die down; even Loki was looking rather put out by his apprentices over dramatic flare.

Shards of ice lessened into fluffy puffs of snow once again. Gales relaxing into gentle gusts as the blinding blanket cleared the scene into view. A dark shadow amongst the white loomed over another until seated on the floor. Fandral was the first to step forward, unsure but eager to learn the truth as the others joined his patrol towards the centre of the yard. Laughter joined the soft patter of flakes as Kari rolled her eyes up at the asgardians ignoring her obvious discomfort. The fixation of the bands humour being the hog-tied guard laying on his front held captive with a mixture of his own belts.

"You have won this round, brother." Bimbo gave his younger sibling an especially loud clap across the back causing his brother to rock on the spot.

"Was their truly any doubt I would fail?" Loki shrugged unapologetically before following blondies trail towards the palaces warmth.

Was that it? Seriously? Not even a thank you. Well, what had she expected from the god of lying scumbaggery. At least her grandfather was looking rather proud of his genes and helping her back onto her feet - though her ribs were really hurting now. The tussle during the white out had not been a pleasant one. Kari hissed angrily through her teeth as Fandral lifted her arm over his shoulder for support; Balder remaining behind as he tried his best to untie the unconscious guard from his rather embarrassing position.

A nice visit to the healers, a long bath and a few days lying around in bed not doing anything was certainly called for. Loki undoubtedly knew when to keep his distance or perhaps it was merely because he had no more use of her. Whatever the reasoning, the nuisance practically seemed to have vanished from her life completely as she spent a few days being lazy as all hell hanging out in her bedclothes and taking irresponsibly long naps. Being born a cat would have had some seriously good perks if this was what your life was like.

Well she did have to put her clothes on a few times, when the warrior's three came around to drink profusely into the night. Fandral was getting a rather enjoyable kick out of bragging and making up bits here and there about her fight. It was great having the drunks around again, especially when she got to here about the quests they had been on whilst away. Apparently the dragon they were chasing turned out just to be an over grown snake in the woods and the ale they were so keen to try tasted like dog piss – when they had tried actual dog piss was not an inquiry she was planning on making – but that had not stopped the legendary warriors picking a fight with a few rock trolls and rescuing maidens. Whether they were actually preventing trouble or causing it was a question best not ask but it positively sounded like they knew how to have some serious frat boy fun.

With the first night of the New Year celebrations approaching – before Odin and his select party took off on some sort of traditional hunt – it was nice to hear she had been invited as something other than a serving wench. Thor was apparently still in the doghouse with Fandral but the invitation being of a guilt converted kind was not going to deter her. Luxury cuisine, no work and getting to hang out with Balder for longer than a few minutes here and there was just the life-changing sort of thing she was keen for. Maybe Prue would be there to and could tell her how to convince an asgardian man to propose – though on second thought, being a house wife was not all that appealing; she would have to have babies and clean and stuff.

"Ewww." Kari shuddered at the thought heading back to Fandral's rooms with a plate full of prunes – losing a few pounds by the evening would up her confidence.

What to wear was still in question. Fandral would not let her out wearing a short-skirted number – the weird hypocritical prude. Her blue dress had been worn out way too often and besides, Loki liked it on her. That was definitely a cringe worthy thought, had she binned the garment already? Shorts again? No way, those were old news now.

Kari paused in the middle of the main room, brow tightening as she thought deeply about that which she had just seen. Just to confirm she twirled around and stared down at the bow trimmed box resting innocently on a chair. What was this and why was it here? Only one way to find out.

Placing down her plate of prunes, Kari snuck up on the package leaning over the back of the chair as if using it as a shield and reached for the note poking out from under ribbon. It was a pretty darn classy looking card covered in golden detailing of flowers entwined and two words written across the surface – 'Karian Motter'.

"For me?" She enquired of the voiceless box as if it might answer her back. "Seriously? I got a present?"

She could barely contain her giggling excitement, running around the chair to attack the gift full on. Why was ribbon always so hard to get off? Sliding it off the sides she threw off the lid and peeled back the folded layers of paper within. Fabric looked back at her, a square patch of purple when lifted unraveled down to the floor to reveal a gown etched with intricate patterning made from silver thread. Kari hiccoughed a high-pitched noise of adoration forcing the fabric against her body to check the fit. She practically wet herself when she noticed there was more inside the box, matching shoes, blue gemstones set in silver. It had to have been Balder; the whole outfit matched that hot bastard like a glove.

Prunes forgotten, Kari collected up her gifts and card and scurried away into her room. A bath needed to be had, curly hair tamed and a lot of preening – was six hours really enough time? It must have been a family trait, even Fandral liked to spend a couple of hours fixing his hair and staring into mirrors. The amount of time he spent brushing his moustache was practically criminal. Even so, they were both going to be the best looking at the party tonight.

"My dear, if you do not hurry I will leave without you." Fandral attempted to coax is granddaughter from her room.

"I'm doing my hair granddad!" She shouted back through the door over a lot of strange hissing sounds.

"It is fine the way it was this morning."

"You are not helping!"

"Is there some way I might so we may leave before dinner is over?"

"No. Go and trim your moustache."

"I have already seen to it." He instinctually reached up to preen at his whiskers.

"Is it still on your face?"

"Of course."

"Then you haven't seen to it properly."

"Your words wound me, my dear."

"And your moustache scares me." She paused as another round of strange noises began and swiftly ended. "I swear it is plotting against me."

"I am leaving now."

"Seriously?" She sounded skeptical. "Granddad?" She opened her bedroom door when there was no response only to find the room very empty. "I can't believe he just… urgh."

Making a girl go alone. What was that daft old man thinking now? It was only a little joke about his moustache, though in reality she really did not like the thing on his face. The way it twiddled and levitated above his lips like two hands on a clock. Shuddering at the thought she dashed back into her room pinning the last strand of her hair into place. Getting such a frizzy mess into a loose curled Grecian style up do was really quite a feat with just herself and asgardian technology. How could they live without straighteners and blow driers? Whatever, it was done now, and did this sort of style make her look like a proper lady? Or maybe it was just the dress and the shoes and the sexy amount of bling. Balder was so getting laid tonight even if she had to get him really drunk first.

A deep steadying breath and out the door she went practicing her walk with such a long dress. At least he had sent nice practical shoes with the outfit, heels really would not have worked with so much fabric close to her feet. How he had managed to find out her sizing was a mystery, though maybe he had help in that department. A seamstress, Prue, maybe even her grandfather? Forgetting about it, Kari smiled wide as she came towards the dining hall already filled near capacity by wandering guests mingling in loud and glorious fashion – asgard parties were never quiet affairs.

Entering on her own suddenly felt very awkward, however, by the rush of enquiring looks she was receiving. Even the odd woman gave her an eyebrow raise but that was to be expected when looking quite so fine. Maidens in a nice recess already surrounded Fandral, the rest of the warriors three close by. Walking further in amongst the gabble she spotted Loki with his attention firmly on a rather tall skinny sort of woman with an impeccable nose. If only they made those things to order. Good luck to her though, whoever she was, hopefully Loki would not do something mean spirited like break it. That would be a shame for the entire universe. Maybe she could get a picture of that nose and take it back to earth and see if a surgeon could do something about her own.

"What is this game you play?" Thor was hovering above her now, mesmerized by the strange way she held the tip of her nose with forefinger and thumb.

"Just uh, you know, wondering what my nose would look like if it was someone else's."

"Why would you wish for another's nose?"

"Hmmm, well, because I don't really like mine?" She shrugged.

"It suits you fine." He chuckled following her line of vision now over to the woman talking with Loki. "I shall leave you, Fandralkin."

"Yeah, you have another matter to take care of." She rolled her eyes at the bimbo's back, knowing all to well what games the two brothers were about to play with skeletor nice nose.

Whatever, she did not want to talk to the prince – either of them - anyway. Where was Balder? Or even Prue? Making her way deeper into the crowd, having to deal with the epiphany of just how small she was compared to the average male in this realm, she sort out someone worth chatting to that would not automatically try to grope her butt. Not that it stopped random warriors she knew not at all doing it as she passed them. Dogs, all of them.

Like a beacon at night, a mess of brown hair and shoulders covered in silver and purple emerged amongst the crowd as she fought to reach him. Why was everyone so lodged tight? Oh, wrestling. No wonder Balder was so engrossed staring at a blocked – to her – view of grunting sweaty men grappling each other to the floor. When she ultimately arrived at her destination, Kari was exhausted by the near death experience of walking and collapsed against her favourite warriors arm. He looked down briefly at his burden, before his gaze quickly shifted back to some inherently crowd-pleasing move from one of the wrestlers that had the crowd cheering and Balder with them. If only she were taller, or the crowd shorter or maybe even a box to stand on would do.

"What's happening?" She queried, bobbing her head left to right in an attempt to see through the crowd.

"Lortheim has thrown Arnbjorn clean over his back and toppled him to the ground." Balder did his best to reiterate the match taking place.

"Is he hurt?"

"His body will heal. That of his pride I know not how the bruises shall fair."

"What happened now?" She attempted to gain a little more height by standing on tippy toes and using Balder as an anchor to no avail as the crowd picked up in volume.

"Arnbjorn holds his opponent in a headlock. They are tussling for dominance."

"Who do you think is going to win?"

"Arnbjorn is older, stronger, but Lortheim is enduring and agile. The fight is fair and few apart."

"Fine, I bet you Lortheim will win."

"That is a bet I am afraid you shall lose."

"We'll see tough guy." Kari giggled, slapping him jovially on the arm. "Winner gets the other a drink."

"I accept your terms." They shook hands as best they could in such tight quarters. "Arnbjorn has lifted Lortheim for a finishing blow."

"I can see that!" She stared worriedly at the man suddenly come into view being held very high up indeed. "COME ON LORTHEIM! PULL HIS HAIR IF YOU HAVE TO!"

"That is not a part of the rules." He tried to correct her.

"I don't care." She shooed him off growing wide-eyed as her bet was thrown out of sight. "What's happening? What's happening?"

"Lortheim fell against another warrior and is preparing to charge his foe. Arnbjorn is readying." Balder was bobbing his own rather tall head in the excitement now. "He has lost his footing on spilled wine."

"Oh yes!" She could not believe how much she was getting into this. "COME ON TAKE HIM DOWN!"

"Lortheim has tackled Arnbjorn, but has been kicked off."

"No, no, no!"

"Lortheim has tackled him again, Arnbjorn is unable to pull him loose. They have both lost their footing on the spilled wine."

"This is starting to sound like some strange asgardian version of mud wrestling now."

"Arnbjorn has pinned Lortheim, but he still struggles."

"COME ON! GET UP!"

"Arnbjorn tires, Lortheim has reversed their positions."

"Yes!"

"He is braced firm against Arnbjorn's chest. He cannot move."

"Has he won? Has he won?" She tugged on his arm over excited as the crowds' cheering achieved an all time high.

"Indeed you have won our bet."

"Yes!" Kari fist pumped the air laughing at her companions equally excitably flushed face – that was really something; talk about adrenaline rush.

"I shall return with your spoils as promised." Balder nodded as he turned to escape into the dispersing crowd.

At least with the wrestling match now over, the make shift ring was being used once again for people to stand. A little more breathing room for everyone and some space to see your feet was a welcome privilege. Boy was it getting hot in the huge hall fast. You would think it were summer outside instead of winter.

Peering around she spotted Balder returning with two cups in his hands – no doubt filled with wine. Her smile rapidly faded as she noted the odd look he was giving the length of her dress however. Looking down she checked for stains, finding none but kept looking anyway until she spotted his boots ahead of her.

"You have come bearing my colours." His facial features screamed seriousness as he handed her a cup.

"Uh, yeah I guess?" She shrugged, taking another glimpse of herself just to be sure. "Is something wrong?"

"With your clothing."

"Wait, you didn't leave this dress for me?" OK, this was getting seriously weird. "I found it in my room with a card and my name printed on it."  
"We are being made to be fools." Balder stared into the crowd at something or someone she could not see.

"Fools?"

"To come to such an event dressed thusly gives the appearance I have claimed you."

"Claimed me? Ok, look, I'm from London. Nobody claims nobody there and I have no idea what you are going on about. It's just some colours. We both happen to like the same colours you know. Not as if it's the first time I've wandered around in purple."

"I understand but the circumstances of this evening carry a weight of formality." He was staring across the room once more.

"Who are you even looking- forget it." She exhaled out the building rage, downing her cup of wine in two gulps before handing it back. "Fine, I'll go and change or something if it really makes you uncomfortable."

"That would be best." He nodded accepting her empty cup.

"Oh good." Could she have said that any more sarcastically without him getting she was annoyed?

Shaking her head, Kari stormed off through the crowd heading straight for the door at a faster pace than she would have originally thought possible in floor length evening gown. Angry really helped keep you on your toes at times. No way in hell was she going to give him the satisfaction of falling in front of everyone. Not that he would want her to fall. Balder was a nice guy right? Well apart from this fiasco dashing her confidence in one fell swoop. She had been looking smoking hot too, right up until she reached Fandral's rooms and made her mascara run all over a face that was. Stupid dress, stupid mascara and stupid, stupid Balder.

"Fuck!" She screamed as she made it to her bedroom door. "Fuck! Fuck! Shit! Balls! Fuck shit balls!" She kicked off her shoes, straight to the corner of shame with her ugg boots, jewellery following close behind with the dress only lagging due to having difficult to remove buttons. "I hate you, you stupid dress! Why are you even here? Who even sent yo-" She paused a second, realisation hitting her like a ton of bricks to the pancreas before pins were torn out of her hair causing angry cascades of loose curls to flow about her shoulders. "Fuck you Loki!"

Wiping furious at her face with her forearms, make up getting smudged everywhere, Kari moved from corner of shame to chest of draws and began filtering through. Jeans and a random old t-shirt was the best she could mentally calibrate worth wearing. She was not going back to the party now; it would be too embarrassing and lonely – especially as she did not want to see Balder or Loki at that moment. Screw it she did not want to even be in her own room right now either.

Running out of her bedroom, shoeless and trying to clean her face on the bottom of her top, Kari rushed out into the palace and turned into the corridor leading out towards the bi-frost. It was freezing as she made it outside, droplets of snow though sparse in nature, falling casually and landing in growing piles of white across the stair well down to the city. Her bare feet were chilled, making her hiss and scuttle along the balls of her feet to hang over the edge of the overlook and stare down at the drop to the lake below. Breathing in cold, she exhaled warmth that materialised as fog and watched the reliable shine of stars fixed into position above amongst dispersing grey clouds.

"You are upset with me."  
"No." She bit her lip, the word was no but her tone was yes, how conniving of her vocal chords to be. "A little. Maybe." Rolling her eyes with a sigh, she began playing with dirt particles on the wall as Balder casually moved to stand besides her. "Before you ask, I'm not sure why. I just am."

"I understand." He eyed her and her refusal to look at him, arm raised but unsure though the shiver between her shoulder blades was enough request for him to touch and pull her closer into the warmth of his side. "My words were to protect your honour rather than my own."

"Yeah." She huddled closer, lip trembling as she frowned at the scenery. "You think it was Loki?"

"I have my suspicion."

"He's such a dick."

"His teasing has motive."

"Other than trying to be the biggest dick in all asgard?"

"That is as I believe."

"I don't care what his motives are. I wish he'd just leave me alone already."

"As do I."

"Aren't you sweet." Kari giggled, looking up at the warrior for the first time. "Can't you go and throw him off a tall building for me, pretty please?"

"The all father would not permit such."

"Oh well." She shrugged moving from one foot the other in quick succession. "Brr, my feet are going numb."

"Where are your shoes?" He stared down noting her bare feet.

"I didn't bring any. Hey, woah!" She grimaced and mildly panicked as her weight was so easily lifted into his arms but at least her feet weren't trying to stick to the floor anymore.

"I shall take you back to your room."

"No." She shook her head, balancing her upper body with arms wrapped about his shoulders as she leaned in and kissed him not ungratefully. "I don't want to go back to my room."

He stared at her, eyes locked but that heated look she was giving him was unmistakable in meaning. It was not as if it was the first time a woman had looked at him that way. Their lips met again, less gentle, no longer pensive but wholly entangled as it deepened into a mutual moan. Pupils dilated on either side, he readjusted her weight to something comfortable for them both – though her weight was as nothing to the natural strength of an asgardian male – and turning carrying her away from the cold night towards warmth and shelter.

Was this really happening? Had she somehow actually won over Balder to some kinky fun time games? Was getting laid an actual option. Oh god, it had been a while; two years to be exact. What if she could not recall how things were done? Well that was a stupid worry; of course she knew how it was done. Everyone over the age of nine could take a decent stab in the dark and guess how it was done. Why was she so nervous? Balder was a nice guy right, no scary surprises and no lack of calls after the morning. He probably made an amazing breakfast. Oh wow, was she going to get breakfast? Scrambled eggs and bacon sounded like a great idea. No, no, no, why was she thinking about breakfast when he was looking at her like a doting puppy?

Her cheeks were hot, she was blushing furiously as he placed her down once more to open his door and allow her entry. Timidly, nervous to the extreme, Kari strolled in looking around at the handcrafted furniture as if seeing it for the first time. Girl seriously needed to get her game face on and back into the groove. How would she have dealt with this back on Earth?

She chuckled to herself, turning on the spot as Balder made some sort of confused motion towards a jug offering them unvoiced drinks. A drink might calm him down, but screw it she needed to get going before she lost her mojo. Shaking her head, she bit her lower lip seductively, eyeing the warrior up and down. Perhaps he would have said something but who had time for words when a woman was undressing herself for you. He caught her t-shirt as it was thrown, Kari giggling at his focused attention on her as she began unbuttoning her jeans then turned removing them as she walked towards his bedroom and out of sight.

He gave chase, removing his boots and armour as fast as his fingers would allow. She was sitting on his bed, back to him when he entered trying to pry his belt buckled free. Loose curls pushed over her shoulder, Kari removed the straps of her bra one at a time before reaching behind to unclasp the bind. That particular item of her clothing landed quite accurately across his shoulder, when thrown, only distracting him long enough to make him pant, surprised at the mostly naked woman now lying across his bed so exposed. She was watching him, knees bent as she lifted her rear to slide her panties off and throw them at him too.

He looked about ready to cry, managing a tame curse at his own attire still trying to rid himself of chain mail and under clothes. The giggling issuing from his bodies desire was not helping his fragile nerves. As if in apology for his distracted mental state, she crawled across the sheets to him, leaning over the edge to help him detach his pants as he enjoyed the view between removing his shirt. Tripping free of his lowered pants, Balder tumbled into the bed half landing upon his startled but giggling bed mate getting a good handful of each other in the meanwhile.

"I've wanted you to do this too me since forever."

"Forever is a long time." He kissed her, righting himself on the bed as she pulled his head down to bury between her breasts.

He certainly was not saying no to her forward behaviour, spreading his lips along the length of her breastbone in adoration of the curving between her lady lumps. Her hands roamed, digging lightly into the skin on his back as his kisses trailed from left to right then downward in an approaching vector towards her stomach. It tickled making her giggle and squirm till he joined in with a chorus of his own amusement kissing her hard and fast with the added benefit of his tongue.

Everything felt hot, unbearably so, his weight pressing against her chest as they continued to taste one another, feel each other, skin against skin. Her hips instinctually bucked against him, unashamed of the growing mass felt along the reconnaissance mission. Oh god, did she need this, need him, especially inside her. It had been so long she felt like a virgin again. That was a worry; she had had the thought once before but what if she really was a virgin again because of this blue de-aging stuff? All right, she just needed to get wet enough and hope he knew what he was doing.

"Balder?" She breathed between roving kisses.

"Hmm?" Was all he could manage breathlessly.

"Oh god, take me."

When she prayed to him so nicely, how could he refuse? Sliding between her welcoming thighs, he leaned his forehead against hers, kissing her nose delicately. She could feel his erection, hard and prominent as he flexed the length back and forth across her clitoris. Her head rolled back, a longing moan escaping her lips as she squirmed, hips following his ministrations eagerly. He could not look away, eyes concentrating on her every exhilarated feature. What was he doing to her? Driving her out of her mind? If he were not careful, he would get a dose of crazy soon.

"Balder…" She whined, causing him to kiss her forehead and capture her roaming hands attempting to find the source of her torment and speed things along.

It was infuriating; he was infuriating, holding back on what she wanted with that teasing smile on his face. She was pouting now, his lips squelching her attempt at emotional blackmail as he held her wrists captive above her head. There was little he could do to prevent her hips circling his erection trying to find the best way to reach a mutual compromise, however. He was moaning now, her offence making some purchase and stimulating him quite nicely.

The relief between them was evident, coming off in great anticipating waves as she felt his alignment reach the optimum angle. Her skin was hot, breath ragged as he pushed his way inside filling her gradually with a purely satisfying sensation. The realm was blurring. Her vision confused and lust filled as they worked together finding a unison rhythm. To long, it had been too long but god did it feel so good and right.

She could feel his sweat mingling with her own but that hardly mattered a thing anymore. A building thrum between them, muscles inexcusably tight and exhilarated. Pain, pleasure, it was all the same now and glorious a sensation making her toes curl with every grunting thrust. His tongue was all over her body, she scarcely knew where he had not visited anymore and the scratches across his back were growing in some severity.

They could hardly breathe any longer, oxygen was scant, great gulps needing to feel their lungs and fuel them further and faster. The pace was brutal, her thighs showing signs of reddening where his fingers gripped tightly for purchase. The calls of pleasure between them building in length and volume until ear piercing and constant. She could hardly take it any more, something had to give.

Her grip tightened on his arms, her thrusts meeting his own in rapid succession as she peppered feverish kisses along the length of his neck. Legs twirling around his body, deepening the penetration was about all he needed to head full speed towards his peak. She screamed at the onslaught, muscles tightening throughout her body as she climaxed through the rocking motion of his own.

A moment was needed to reboot. Minds and bodies frayed into near delirious unconsciousness. They panted together as one, Balder slipping to the side and taking his companion with him as he collapsed onto his back. She lay against him, nonsensical for words but conveying everything she meant through loving kisses.

Wow was she still all kinds of hot and sweaty when morning rolled its head around. Groaning at the light assaulting her eyes, Kari flipped around on the bed burying her face into the nook of her lovers arm. He looked so peaceful when asleep, chest rising and lowering in great soothing waves that made her sigh. She kissed his shoulder, running her fingers across his stomach and stroking the line of hair that ran in a landing pad line ever downwards. How could a man smell so yummy? Why did she want to sniff him so much?

"What are you doing?" Balder enquired sleepily as he caught her nose deep in his armpit.

"Nothing." She shook her head, guilty as all hell and trying to play it off with a welcomed kiss. "Morning."

"Good morning." He leaned in kissing her forehead this time before shifting under the covers to escape from his bed.

"Where are you going?" As annoyed as she was with the lack of morning snuggling, watching a well-toned asgardian warrior strolling around the room naked was a sight worth the disappointment.

"I leave this day with Odin's hunting party."

"Oh." She sighed. "So… I won't be seeing you for a while I guess?"

"We shall return on the twelfth night of New Year to celebrate with the spoils of our hunt."

"So like, ten days?" She could not help the pout staining her expression and causing the noble warrior to hesitate. "I'll miss you."

"And I you." He smiled, receiving a returning gesture from the naked woman in his bed.

"Right well…" She got out of bed herself, grabbing up her underwear from the floor. "Uh, I need to get back before granddad starts freaking out."

"Fandral." Balder blanched at the other mans name. "I shall speak with him."

"Huh?"

"About our circumstance."

"Right…" Oh this was going to be very uncomfortable; at least they were all going away for a week and a half. "He'll probably bite my head off you know. Thinks I'm bad for you or something."

"I believe his first priority is your care."

"Yeah, you don't hear the conversations granddad and I have in private."

"Nor have you heard that which we speak as men."

"Touché." She went in search of missing jeans and t-shirt in the other room. "I don't think I want to hear them either. Though, if you could, I would really appreciate you trying to talk him out of that moustache."

"I would never come between a man and his beard."

"What a shame." She sighed feigning more hurt than she truly felt whilst reappearing fully dressed. "Well, I'll catch you before you go?"

"I would like that." He joined her in a parting kiss before she removed herself hurriedly from his room.

Getting home before Fandral woke up was a very good plan after what transpired last night and especially if Balder wanted to be the one to have a man to man with one of his best friends. How awkward was this? Shacking up with your grandfather's friend. Did this make her a redneck or a scalley now? Whatever, what was done was done and damn was it done well. Getting laid again sure put the twinkle back into her blood supply. Why had it taken so long? Waiting made it all the sweeter at least.

Great, granddad and his hussies. Feigning a puking motion, Kari tiptoed over the spray of naked bodies lining the main room with Fandral among the count. She hardly cared to cover his nudity up this time; what was the point? She had seen it so many times now it hardly offended her eyes any longer.

Making it to her room, she removed her clothing once again, making sure to take a second to sniff all the man scent rubbed off onto the fabric. It was making her horny again and there was going to be no release for it. Nothing for it, bath time and wash that man away – until next time. Grabbing a towel she skipped off into the bathroom in nothing but her underwear, not that the comatose post-party would see anything.

Leaning back into the warmth of the water, her thoughts were still glued to last night and Balder's performance. Images flashing through her mind, half remembered, unfocused lust filled kind of thoughts. The way he touched her; Balders rough hands on her naked body, making her skin tremble. His kisses up and down her neck; the way his tongue tasted and his green eyes-

"Holy shit balls!" Kari jumped, eyes darting open as water splashed over the sides from the momentum. "What the hell was that? Green eyes? He has blue eyes! Oh god…"

She was shivering despite the warmth of the water around her, hands clutched to her heart as she tried to figure out what she had just been imagining. Taking a deep steadying breath she shut her eyes again trying to think back to her previous memory. His lips on hers, tongue twisted and tangled with her own. Green eyes? Bookshelves? This was something else, somewhere else. Her head hurt, she remembered that. She told him he was beautiful.

"Oh…" She exhaled through her nose, rising out of the tub to find her towel and run away from the scene of the crime.

She hit her head weeks ago; that crazy concussion she got. Was that what happened when she could not remember? He took advantage of a concussed woman? Loki really was a dick. At least it was not anything more than a kiss session right? What a kiss though. What, no, no, no, not what a kiss, in that tone or any other tone that sentence might go with. Balder's kisses, they're nice and sweet and not as passionate and hard as Loki's.

"Fuck!" She was pulling her jeans on again but finding shoes and a warmer tunic to wear with them this time.

She had to get out; run for the hills or where ever she could go that would stop her thinking about boys and kisses. Hopping over bodies beginning to stir, Kari darted out of Fandral's rooms and out into the palace. Run, run, run, as fast as you can, she repeated on loop in her head as she ran through corridors trying to remember the way out of asgard again.

"Kari?" Her name spoken allowed was enough to halt her in the midst of a breathless run.

"Sif?" She responded back between gasps for oxygen.

"Where go you so promptly?" The raven-haired warrior made her way over to the confused looking midgardian.

"I… I don't know I just… have to get out of here."

"What has happened?"

"Nothing, no, nothing, just uh…"

"Come." Sif was taking no prisoners, well maybe one by the name of Karian Motter as she frog marched the babbling wreck into an empty room nearby. "Explain, you are besides yourself."

"Yeah I know I just… oh god… oh god…" She tried not to slap herself out of stunned crazy and fell into a chair besides a long cold fire instead. "I mean, Balder is so nice and… but then I remember Loki and the concussion and I'm like so… what am I supposed to think? I can't stop thinking about it."

"Slow down." Sif motioned her hands as if calming a spooked horse. "Speak again, I understand you not."

"It's just… I was just… I was just with Balder but then while I was thinking about Balder I remembered something that happened a few weeks ago when I hit my head and… I kissed Loki!"

"You hit your head you say?"

"Yeah."

"Then you are hardly to blame." Sif waved off the confession.

"Yes but… I think I liked it. I mean really liked it. And now all I can think is, I like it more than Balder but I hate Loki. How can I hate Loki but like the way he kisses me and love Balder but not like the way he kisses me as much as Loki? How does that make sense?"

"Have you hit your head recently?"

"No." Kari scowled trying to recall any such mishaps in the last few days. "Not that I remember."

"Then perhaps you are simply caught in the memory of something that was recently surfaced."

"Right, yeah, that makes sense I guess."

"Go and speak to Loki." Sif suggested. "You will soon realize your true feelings for the prince."

"That uh… yeah… remind myself what a huge dick he is you mean."

"I believe that would solve your current dilemma."

"Right, right. Thanks Sif." She nodded, standing up still looking somewhat dazed. "I'll go do that now and then… pfft." She shrugged as Sif patted her on the shoulder and followed her out.

With some resolve behind her and Sif's words of wisdom, Kari steadied her thoughts and began the walk towards the library. Where else would Loki be? Quiet and smelling of old wood and pages, she tried her best to focus on her surroundings as she walked the length of bookcases towards the centre. He was there of course, eyes following her movements across the polished floor to his casual resting spot against the window out looking the world beyond the palace.

"Karian Motter." Loki was all grin and predatory gaze as he slipped from his perch to meet his prey half way. "What do I owe the pleasure of such an unsolicited visit?" His brow furrowed at the erratic behaviour in front of him; eyes twitching left and right unfocused and apparently unhearing. "Is this about the evening last, perchance?"

"Last night?" She sounded dazed and confused.

"Yes. The New Year's celebrations?" He tried to coax her into the conversation with little effect. "The noble bore made quite the number of accusations in my direction pertaining to yourself and a dress?"

"Balder?"

"Are you well?"

"I…"

There was nothing for it; her mind would not stop flicking back and forth between now and then. Her hand jumped up on the attack, surprising the mischief-maker into curiosity as to the appendage attached to his collar but rapidly answered by the collision of lips forcing him into a kiss. He had to blink in the scene; it was becoming a common event between them. Perhaps it had something to do with all the books? Not wanting to waste an opportunity he dived in, an arm reeling her in closer by the waist as his other combed through her damp hair between lip biting, tongue tasting, mouth-to-mouth.

It was a long time coming, but over like a flash grenade. Kari pushed away, forcing their entanglement to part as she skittered back several steps with the shake of her head. No, it was wrong. It felt wrong, which was what made it feel good.

"I don't like you."

"What?" This certainly did not happen to him much.

"I don't like you." She chuckled.

"You came all this way, disturb my morning and force yourself upon me simply to tell me you like me not?"

"Yeah." She continued to smile nodding her head with agreement. "I was really worried there for a second but Sif was right."

"Sif has put you up to this folly?" Loki began calculating future revenge.

"No, not really." She tried to explain to a furious looking prince. "Look, I like Balder but then I remembered this crazy stuff when I was concussed that time. You remember that right?" His glaring told her he did. "I was just really confused for a moment there and Sif suggested I just go talk to you and remind myself I don't like you."

"Your insults are quite enough!" He snapped throwing her into a guarded posture. "It is your feeble mind that fails to comprehend my superiority to that noble bore!"

"Loki, look, Balder's apple pie and you're custard. It's great if you can find someone who is both apple pie and custard but that's like a one in a million sort of person and I just realized, I prefer apple pie to custard so…"

"You dim-witted, whimpering child." Things were getting nasty now. "You have no idea whom you speak of."

"You're taking this really well I see." She rolled her eyes with an added look of 'here we go again'. "By the way, that was you that sent that dress right?"

"If only to see you distanced from him."

"Well that didn't work." She had to laugh at that thought; had he really thought a dress would be enough to break up her and Balder? "What is your problem anyway? Do you really like me that much? I'm flattered really, but, I really do hate you a lot. You're not exactly the nicest guy in the world. You're a psychotic liar."

"There is worse than liars in this universe."

"Oh yeah, like what?" Arms folding she prepared herself for whatever he was about to dish out. "Balder? He's like the nicest guy ever."

"Is he now?"

"Don't be so god damn cryptic. Say what you have to say. Does he have herpes or something?" Her tone lowered to that of a schoolteacher addressing a pupil until he pried something into the open from around his neck. "What's that?"

"You remember this not?" Loki dangled the small snow globe from its chain letting it swing back and forth like a pendulum.

"No I…" She blinked, mesmerized and confused as a strange haze made her brain feel hot and fluffy. "Where did you…?"

"Would you like to hold it?" He reached forward, closing the gap between them.

"I don't think I should." But it was too late, her hands reflectively closing around the tiny globe.


	56. Chapter 56: Your a king but I

Words just on the edge of hearing, muffled and distant but coming ever closer. Was she moving or were they? A sense of euphoria, a falling sensation that picked up speed until the darkness – much like the voices – developed into a burning red that confused her eyes. Breathing became by her own will, as opposed to the reflex action of her body, as she tried to think clear. This was the back of her eyelids she was seeing, a light source from the world around her corrupting the thin walls of skin.

Her head buzzed with confusion, lips dry and heavy with dirt but the words were forming cognitive meaning now. A deep, proud man's voice followed by another that sounded strong but gentle at once. She knew their tones and timbre but could not recall whom they belonged to beyond the fog of dulled confusion.

"-suffered beyond the realms of penance in such a harsh world." That voice she definitely knew, the weary tone of authority was not one you could easily forget.

"It was lovely there." Her voice was hoarse but still she managed to force from it a higher volume than was probably necessary.

"Kari?" Fandral was quick to respond to the fluttering nature of his granddaughter's eyes as she fought against his hold on her.

"Put me down." Though tired her words were obviously unkindly meant and were greeted with a hurt look but compliance of the order. "Thanks." She added as if a pleasantry would bring the moustache-wielding swordsman some solace.

Feet unsteady, as well as her mind, Kari looked up at the surrounding asgardian giants with a level of fierceness usually reserved for staring down predators or wild dogs – though in this case she was probably the dog and they the bears. It was unnerving being so small, a child's height, but she had faced down bigger in Jotunheim and none of this gold wearing riff-raff was going to make her back down. Looks exchanged, wary, pity filled, disgusted at her blue skinned visage, as she cautiously worked her way through the crowd of warriors, princes and a king. Green made her pause her survey, smooth black hair slicked back as eyes twinkled in daring. He wanted her to make a scene, attack him again, show herself to be mad and on a cause for his life. How low, how primitive must she have fallen in his minds eye?

"He did this!" She pointed him out again, less angry but more determined to be heard now in the presence of the all father. "He dropped me through a drawing on the library floor into Jotunheim."

"Nonsense." Thor was certainly sceptical. "Why would my brother have worked so diligently for months with hardly rest to return you safely home if he desired you missing?"

"My dear, do you not mean you tripped and fell onto some work of magic Loki was in the process of, as he explained?" Fandral's unadulterated level of patronising was enough to make her increasingly furious.

"He said that? Of course he would say that. He's LOKI!" Wild fight was returning to her skittish movements as Kari twirled around eyeing her captives to end with a pointed finger of accusation directed at the innocent prince. "Am I the only one that knows he's the god of lies?" Her attention turned swiftly onto that of the ever-watchful eye of Odin. "Why don't you do something about him? You let him get away with everything!"

"Enough!" The all father slammed his staff with a resounding 'boom' almost knocking the belligerent waif off her feet from the resonance.

"No!" She screamed back unperturbed by the king's clout.

"I said enough!"

"And I said NO!" Kari was up the steps mere inches from Odin and his throne before so much as a handful of her fur clothing could be clutched by anyone around.

"Obey your king!" He leaned forward, all the better to intimidate the red-eyed youngster.

"You are not my king!" She stamped her foot, fighting the urge to punch the old man in his stupid face and instead turned her attention back to that of the mystified god of mischief. "He did it! He did it because I punched him in the-"

"The child has clearly been corrupted with either magic or torture most foul." Odin cut her off, giving the wilderness smelling sproglet a poke down a step with the blunt end of his staff as if worried about sticky fingers touching his nice clean throne.

"I sense no magic corrupting her mind, father." Loki shrugged an answer to one of the charges.

"Listen to me!" She had her clean enough fingers on his staff now, trying to pull it out of the all fathers hands least he prod her with it some more.

"Then we must correct this untameable child that bares the colours of a monster ourselves."

"They are not monsters!" She corrected the king's obvious racism despite having lost the tug of war.

"I shall wipe her memories of her time with the frost giants."

"What?" She hardly needed to hear that threat twice before she started running.

"Balder!" Odin called out as the warrior in question easily scooped up the Jotun looking child passing his position. "Restrain her."

"No! No!" Kari kicked and flailed despite recent fatigue but was unable to reach places to bite. "Let me go!"

"With all due respect, such magic may prove a danger to such a fragile mind." Loki stepped into the spotlight; his brow creased with concern enough the stir Fandral's attention away from his combative granddaughter.

"Danger?" The swordsman stepped closer to the throne and by the same token Loki also. "My king, is there not another way?"

"Perhaps over time but always will the child's loyalties be at question." The all father answered flatly and to the point aware of the blond warrior's worry but needing him to see better sense of the situation foremost.

"You may break her mind completely with this." Loki continued his misgivings, tearing Fandral between the two gods much like a believer being tested of faith. "Such a long period of time and a child's mind. If she were asgardian then by all accounts but a midgardian is of no resilience as we are."

"I will not have untrustworthy subjects in the house of Odin."

"But father-"

"In this matter my mind is made!"

"Perhaps," Fandral lowered to his knee, fear within him rising to greet his eyes, "my king, might reconsider-"

"Bring her to me." Odin waved off his kneeling subjects request and stood looking to Balder.

"No. Please don't." She was not struggling any longer, having lost the energy to continue moments ago but that did not stop her newest act of war. "Please."

"Balder." Odin spoke his words softer to the knowingly gentle by nature warrior, Balder's hesitation at the sight of a child's tear filled eyes obvious for all to see. "It is to help the child."

"No." Kari shook her head, lip trembling, and once red eyes now blue and pleading for release.

"Yes my king." Balder finally answered, bringing his captive where ordered, though his eyes never left hers as if on some level he felt he owed her that much.


	57. Chapter 57: Super woman

Her mind was on fire, scarred and fragmented memories remerging with the synthetic ones. The woods, the snow, catching fish, a wolf named Tom. She was crying at what felt like a lifetime of memories resurfacing at once on the library floor. A warm stream trickled down over the top of her lips, droplets of crimson meshing with the puddle of blood and shattered glass in her hands. The strength of her grip, tight and constraining against the keepsake, had been too much for the tiny globe to take though the release brought by its destruction had been exhilarating.

Loki eyed her from above as one emotion after another took control of the broken mind in front of him. Tears became laughter, fear became anger, there was even a bout of boredom clear to see as memories played like dreams behind her glazed eyes. His face was taunt, his expression made of hard lines and his skin paler than usual. What exactly had he just done? A broken mind cracked further? Just how much more could a midgardian psyche take beyond this?

Silence, crazed laughter had fallen deaf leaving behind only ragged breathing and a motionless stare at the ground beneath her. He bent low to reach the strands of curly hair hiding her face from him, tucking the majority behind her ears before he felt the need to lower himself onto knees in order to administer aid of some kind. Clicking his fingers gave no reaction, clapping his hand not so much as a flinch.

"Motter?" He spoke slow and deliberately. "Do you hear me?" He received no answer, his fingers instead searching out a concealed handkerchief to at least wipe away the ugliness of her bloody nose.

"Loki?" Her voice was tired, shaky as it slipped past her lips as little more than a whisper.

"Yes?" Though relieved he continued to clean her face despite her eyes remaining lacklustre and distant.

"You did it."

"Yes, I did." The confession though long awaited held little of the consequence from its past.

"You let them do that to me because you're to much of a coward to admit it."

"I tried to stop it." He finished his cleaning work, moving down to her hands to pick shards of glass and place into the dirtied cloth for safekeeping. "The all father was determined. He would have concluded his undertaking no matter that I may have admitted to on the occasion."

"I hate you."

"I know."

"I wasn't sick?" Loki shook his head affirming in the negative. "I knew it. I knew it wasn't real. It was so… wrong. He took everything out and jammed all that junk in?"

"That is not exclusively the truth of it." He looked away; painfully aware her eyes were now glued to the side of his face with an extra strong adhesive. "My father tried to rid you of all your unwanted memories but his delicacy in the matter was as I feared. You began fitting, frothing at the mouth before he was half concluded. Healers attended to you next, a fever spiked, there was internal bleeding ordinarily indicative of head trauma. They worked to stabilise your body and I attended to your mind. I rebuilt your memories of the year, salvaged what I could left behind by the all father and stored them in the keep sake I found about your neck."

"You…" She paused, shaking her head with a hiss as the trickster plucked impaling glass out of her injured flesh. "How do I know these 'salvaged' memories are mine? You made up the rest. How… how do I know you didn't make these up?"

"There is no manner in which to create the perfect memory. Memories are specific to the person's views and traits. It is too circumstantial a thing to recreate with any accuracy." Loki steadied his gaze over her hands, lifted by his own, to make sure no more foreign objects remained within. "Your false memories feel unreal do they not?"

"Like banana milkshake." She exhaled despondently; exhausted and unable to rid herself of the spinning nature her sensory was in.

"And the memories you have now?"

"Like warmth."

"I believe that is just a new fever spiking." The blue glow between their hands halted, her wounds healed but a new concern etched across his features as he felt the heat coming off her skin. "Come, sit in a chair and I shall send for tea."

"And cinnamon rolls?" She enquired like a child might, as stronger arms pulled her up to standing and walked her over to a sturdy chair.

"If you must."

Assured of her seating and safety from falling, Loki turned with a steady purpose and marched the length of the library in search of servants outside. It was not such a difficult affair to discover one of many when servants came in abundance around the palace but, as always, it was a difficult matter to keep Motter out of trouble. Not more than a few minutes out of his sight and already the miscreant had vanished from where he left her. Without the need for a second or confirming thought on the subject, he knew exactly where the newly emerged amnesiac would head because it was exactly the last thing he would think of doing.

It certainly had been many years since the god of mischief had been found running through the corridors like a badly behaved child; he half expected to hear his mother scolding him from one end or the other but her chastisement never came. He had to reach her, stop her before more bad seeds were sown out of season. Perhaps that second thought had been necessary; the throne room was very much empty, Loki's brow creasing to accommodate his folly before a remembrance of his own resurfaced. Of course, the new years hunt.

Back peddling, the prince turned knocking down a cluster of pretty ladies of the court; receiving an unresponded selection of screams and shouts in reply. He had no time to care, not that he could care – most had been beneath him before and by now knew the rules of the game. Before his feet brought him to the palace stables, the unmistakable shrill tones of an upset midgardian were loud enough to hear from so far away.

"You just thought you could go into my head like some old laptop with a virus and delete files? I am not a machine! You have no right! You are not a god, you are certainly not my god! You should have left me on Jotunheim, I was happy there!"  
"Jotun's are monsters, they would kill you in the end." Odin was doing his best to reason with the hysterical woman despite his obvious fury at being so harangued in front of his hunting party.  
"The only monster I see is standing in front of me!"

"In the name of your king-"

"You are not my king, I already have a queen and her name is Elizabeth the second and she's a better ruler than you'll ever be! Did you really think, just because you kidnap me, keep me prisoner in another realm and tell me to behave when everyone else around me, including yourself, acts like a villain that I would somehow, magically, accept you than anything other than an overbearing old man?" Kari took an unstable step backwards, forehead doused in beads of sweat at the mixture of fever and exertion. "You're so deluded they should name a disorder after you! Call it the Odin-complex."

"Kari-" Balder, forgetting his horse besides him moved towards his previous nights lover only to be cut off and halted by livid attention now on him.

"Get your hands off of me!" She shook her shoulders, slapping the well-meaning warriors arm clumsily away as he spun in her vision. "Don't you damn well touch me again! Don't you get it? I remember everything! I remember your part in it too!"

"It was to prot-"

"To protect gods from a small mortal child?" Loki sounded inquisitive as he came forward, revealing himself to the group, though his meaning was meant more for insult.

"Loki, what have you done?" Thor waded in on the war of words, walking his steed over to stand next to his father.

"I am hardly the guilty party here, brother."

"Enough! All of you!" Odin commanded, having had enough of all the squabbling now taking place. "Ah!" He lifted his palm, silencing Kari's words with fear of retaliation before she could begin their shouting match once more. "I had thought this matter concluded, never to be brought to the open again. I see now even ghosts may not rest in peace. Have your memories, but accept also the consequences of them. That which I took, after your year of exile in Jotunheim, I now return in full. You have failed your penance, your tasks lay incomplete and I hereby condemn you to serve your remaining days within the dwarven mines-"

"Father!" Thor dismounted his steed in great hurry – somewhere in the back of his mind the knowledge the unpresent Fandral's already unhappy countenance may become overwhelming violent towards his person. "This is madness!"

"I agree with Thor, a midgardian as weak as-"

Loki's questionable words drifted out of earshot as Kari broke out into a run. Fever or not, hanging around for sentencing to mine labour was an insane action to take part in. She might be a little frayed around the edges but completely loco was not yet an optional choice in her framework. No, better to get the hell out of there, run for the hills or in this case the library. Asgard was hardly a safe place for her anymore, if it had ever been. She needed to get back to Jotunheim, back to the giantesses and whatever magic Loki used on her the first time was her best chance. It had to be in the books, somewhere, a section on teleportation or something.

Hastily, Kari worked her way through the bookshelves searching for something of use. Sweat ran down the sides of her face, her sleeves beginning to cling and offer little help against wiping the droplets out of her unsteady vision. There was no time to be good and proper, tomes falling to the floor around her as unwanted books were picked up then released to gravity.

The door to the library creaked open spooking her from her task. Footsteps quick paced but alone came ever closer. He slowed at the signs of vandalism left in his prey's wake, eyebrow raised in unfathomable judgment but eager to continue his task. Green eyes bore into blue, his shoulders relaxing minutely as he paused at the mouth of mysticism.

"Motter." He strolled towards her, book still in hand as she stared him down. "I-"

A flicker and she was gone. Loki stood stunned, a smile creeping the length of his face as he laughed at his own idiocy. How had he fallen for one of his own tricks? An illusion, nothing more and poorly constructed at that. His head was not in the game today.

Walking back through the row of book shaped destruction, the prince kept his senses aware following what little traces of her remained. Deeper into the library, silence apart from the wind blowing in through an open window. He paused at the sight, the air chilly and unwelcome amongst the internal warmth of the structure. He crossed the pathways, a hand reaching out to pull the window shut but something made him halt. A familiar scent on the breeze or perhaps just wishful thinking.

"Meet me outside the weapons vault in the lower levels." He spoke to seemingly the air, as there was none else to see either in the room or outside it from the vantage of the window.

Replacing the lock, he stared out at the scenery ahead of him for a moment longer. The view of the water below was magnificent from this vantage but there were still tasks to take care of.

On the outside peering in, Kari released the breath she had been holding now that the trickster was away somewhere within the library. Her form shimmered into life once more; feet precariously perched on the window ledge as she tried not to contemplate the distressingly long drop down ahead of her. A book was clasped firmly under an arm, the other gripping in the cracks in the brickwork to maintain a sense of balance. The wind was not her friend today, howling and pushing against her sides as if wishing her to fall. Not today.

Carefully, one foot at a time, she began the arduous task of sliding across the ledge trying to reach the safety of a balcony that seemed to be miles off yet was most likely less than a hundred feet in distance away. Why had the architect never thought to build a fire escape or something else more useful? A flimsy bit of brickwork barely wide enough for a small woman's feet was really out of order.

She froze as another round of wind blowing whistled past tossing her hair into her eyes and tried to loosen the book in her arm. This was ridiculous, why did he have to close the window behind her? She could have just jumped back in after he left. What was that mischief-maker up to? Meet him outside the weapons vault? Why? Was he going to stab her with something?

Concentration no longer on the task in front of her, she pressed her weight too soon on the next run of ledge finding the stone loose and shaky as she thought for balance. She needed her other hand to grip the wall, but the book, she needed the book too. Before either debate could be voted on, however, a heart wrenching 'crack' fluttered up through the base of her spine to her ears. The ledge below her shifted then slid out from under her. Kari screamed dropping down but managing to catch the remaining next section of stone - at a price. Dangling by her fingers, she stared down at the fluttering tome spinning its way ever downward towards the water far below.

"No… come on." She whined unthankful in the least for her life at the price of paper and ink. "Wait… come on… up you stupid book! Up!"

Bellowing down at the object made little difference to it's predicament, or her own, though the fierceness of concentration across her features soon repelled back the sweaty fevered nature of her forehead. She had done this before, not quite so precisely or by directly trying but it had happened; she could do it again. All she had to do was persuade the wind to stop battling against her and-

The book paused, shooting back upwards in an erratic spiral. Just as her thoughts were now trying to turn away from delighted achievement onto the difficult task of what to do now the book was airborne, the carrying gust shot past with book in tow only to snatch her along with it. Kari squealed as she was catapulted up into the air the wrong way round. Asgard looked scary from the ledge but now it was terrifying piss your pants sort of high and far away. Wait, did she just pass a cloud?

"Shit balls! Fucking shit balls!"

There was a moment of weightlessness; her eyes bulging at the realisation all upwards motion had just ceased before her stomach lurched at the sensation of falling. She really did not have time for screaming, thought the passing geese certainly had time to make freaked out sounds of surprise. The wind had a lot to answer for right now, but first it needed to listen to her and get her down without dying.

"Comeoncomeoncomeon…"

Kari focused once more; she just needed a stream, like when she caused the whiteout in the training yard. A steady stream underneath her, with just enough force to keep her up but not pushing higher then cutting diagonally across to tilt her away from the pointy bits on the roof and-

"Ahahahaha! I am so superwoman right now." She chuckled at the awkward, jolting hovering she was sort of doing above the palace.

As if some kind of reward for her kind of flying, the lost book bounced against the side of her head momentarily making her lose concentration enough to fall several feet. Whatever, she had this down, back to hovering and a bit closer to the ground with her book. How did you steer yourself properly?

"To the left wind?" She enquired of the air finding herself thrown a great deal less gently than she would have liked, leftwards through a cloud then down again narrowly missing a very high forges exhaust. "I get the feeling you don't like me very much." She sighed, as another gust of diagonal wind blew her unrequested leftwards again.

This time she narrowly missed not a thing. The tree that blocked her path had been quite large and thorough in hitting her with its branches. Groaning, she swore several times under her breath thankful not to be hovering any longer but quite bruised and stuck at odd angles in a tree's grasps. There were leaves in her face and an angry squirrel bouncing up and down on the branch her head was currently resting upon, chittering loudly his anger at her trespass. At least she still had the book.

Untangling herself from branches, Kari shoved the book under her shirt, tucking her top into the waist of her jeans to stop it from falling out. It was a long climb down but at least there was hardly anyone around in the fields to see her clumsy half falling and twig infused hair. Somewhere in the distance she could hear children playing; most likely Garthar and Dagur among their number. If only things were different, maybe if Garthar had been a bit older. No point in thinking about that now, she needed to get down and escape asgard before Odin sent her to a mine.

Reaching the ground, with her rear, Kari hissed as she stood rubbing her backside as if touching the forming bruises was going to help matters. She needed somewhere to draw the teleporting pattern she had seen Loki use from the book and also something to draw it with. The river was not too far, just over the hill with plenty of rocks and sticks. Rocks and sticks might work right? Whatever, she needed to try with what was at hand.

Hobbling at a jog across the fields, she made her way up over the hill and down again towards the riverbank. It was indeed littered with all number of washed up debris fit for use. She started first by clearing a space of stones and driftwood large enough to accommodate her needs then opened the book riffling through the pages until she found a great big picture with the word for Jotunheim above it. This had to be it, just follow the diagram and instant teleport right?

Taking a hand full of debris she had piled to the sides she began mapping out the pattern on the ground. It was wonky, hardly as elegant as Loki's interpretation with chalk on marble but what was she going to do when lacking all three of those components. It looked close enough; hopefully her footprints would not have an effect on the end product but now what? Oh right, a word of power. Oh how magic liked its words of power.

"Uh… Charreth?" She held the book up, standing in the centre of her handiwork trying not to kick anything out of place. "Oh come on… Charref? Carreth? Oh wait… that's an 'N'… Channeth?"

The debris around her glowed a mixture of red and gold around her for a second before growing dim. She was sure it had glowed blue last time and for a lot longer. Why was this not working?

"Channe-"

A loud 'pop' distracted her, a sudden burst of heat filling her lungs and making her attempt to choke but there was no air. Actually there was no anything around her other than a weird sort of gooey blackness. This definitely was not right.


	58. Chapter 58: Wet the bed

A wet sensation permeated her subconscious; she had not wet the bed had she? It was cold all around forcing her body to shiver and become painfully aware of aches, fully formed bruises and various objects stabbing her. Opening her eyes in increasingly widening blinks, Kari groaned and sneezed as the scene before her welcomed with its strangeness. What was this place? Mist, rock and water all around.

Carefully, she pushed herself up, hissing at the stiffness of her limbs and crawled forward out of the pool of water she half lay within. This was a rock pool, salt water caked across her lips making her thirst for something fresher. A beach? It was difficult to see, the world caught in a perpetual twilight and blurred with great billowing swirls of fog. Hands forced under armpits to keep warm, she righted herself and bit her lip in additional concentration as she traversed the rocks down towards what she hoped to be sand. This was definitely not Jotunheim, unless some strange variation of the typically snow covered world never seen before.

Movement caught her attention, shapes and shadows shifting further along the beach out of all recognisable sight. Whatever these things were, they appeared humanoid enough from their outline alone. With brow furrowed and the hair rising cautiously across her skin, Kari wandered into the mist with but a sliver of hope.

"Hello?" She called out to the people around her. "Is anyone, uh, nice and friendly around?"

Stumbling on further rocks prodding out of the sand she came to a halt in front of a muttering shadow mere feet away. Its words seemed confused, a man perhaps by the deep tone of his voice. The way he shuffled made her instinctually step back only to knock against another silhouette in the mist now known to be the shape of a tall woman in rags. She could not help it, it was instinctual to scream at the sight of milky eyes staring down at her bringing further attention through the mist to her person.

"I cannot die." The walking corpse of the woman spoke like gravely air. "Do not let me die."

"Oh my god! Oh my god!" Kari was delirious, wide eyed and shaking with added vehement as she twirled around finding herself surrounded on all sides by corpses begging and pleading her to live again. "Don't touch me! Leave me alone!"

"Take me with you?"

"Let me live again, I will be a better man this time."

"This cannot be the end."

"Do not let me die!"

"No! No!" She screamed, trying to push past the crowd only finding her self latched onto by rotting hands. "Get off! Please?" Tears dampened her face as she continued to struggle, zombies on all sides pushing, tugging and covering her in slime her mind refused to process as any possible substance. "NOOO!"

Caught off balanced by the shuffling tug of war, she collapsed under her own feet as bodies piled on top of her clawing at her flesh. Screaming was becoming difficult, finding oxygen was becoming tricky and trying not to vomit at the stench of her new friends was almost impossible. Thrashing did little good, kicking even less so as she resigned herself to making high pitched squealing sounds and pinching her eyes tightly closed to pretend this was not real; this was not the end.

A new noise filtered through, muffled and powerful in its tone. She paid it no mind even as weight began to lift from her chest; chittering, hissing, gnarly tearing and snapping of bones only caused the now foetal woman to bury her head in her forearms and blubber profusely into her soiled shirt. If she had not wet herself before, she definitely had now but it was a worry beyond her minds current capabilities.

As silence fell around her, except for the rush of waves in the distance, Kari panted as she gulped oxygen enough for her lungs between shivering sobs. Something gentle, soft but wiry in nature, glanced across her bare arms. She was dimly aware of a shadow above her, large and protective in its nature but it still took several minutes for the haze in her mind to clear enough to allow courage to seep back in.

"Y-you?" Kari lay perfectly still as she stared up in mixed relief and awe at the giant spider from so many years ago.

The spider chattered excitedly, several large orbs all focused intently on the girl beneath it. Drawn by the intensity, Kari sat up brushing the back of her hand across the length of a hairy leg initiating an overly sensitive motion from the creature as it pulled back reflectively. There were torn bodies all around them, flesh, bone and heads separated from their once whole self now littering the sand. She stood indifferent of the carcasses, though pausing to retrieve a rusted sword left lying amongst the debris.

"Good spider." She praised her old friend making to follow her protector across the beach and deeper into the land of mist.

It felt as if they had been walking for hours as the spider drew her further away from the shore and into a rocky valley. The occasional tree sat amongst the crags; half dead in appearance but clinging ever so tenderly to life. Great strands of webbing appeared as if out of nowhere around her, see through but lubricated with great bobbles of water droplets that caught the light in magnificent fashion. She stared bewildered at the artistic nature of the spiders home, the creature in question disappearing with all dainty tread into its nest checking on acquired prey. It was better if she did not touch the webbing, least she get caught in the fly trap and so instead skirted the maze looking further into the valley reasonably sure of her safety.

The fog grew deeper as she neared a point to her right; a cave formation making its presence known as she felt along its sides aware of the warmer moisture in the air. Deeper still the cave turned out into a larger domed structure worn away by time and tide of old. There was a light cascading the walls in brilliant green and blue, her fascination intrigued further as she discovered the source to be a bubbling pool within. Warily she reached forward, her fingers grazing the surface of water only to recoil with a yearning surprise.

A hot spring? A very inviting hot spring, she realised as she looked down at her soiled figure with a moment's disgust. Oh this was a perfect distraction to find in such a horrid realm.


	59. Chapter 59: Knee a dragon in the balls

Zombies sure were prevalent, wherever this place was, as well as a selection of other stranger creatures. It had not been long before Kari had been forced to regain some composure and use whatever skills she had managed to learn to any effect for defence. That was only when she left the safety of the spider's nest however, in his domain everything had better beware of Aragog, as she had come to call him, as the spider was liable to eat them; his appetite was really quite immense and unprejudiced.

At some point, during stumbling about in the misty valley, she had come across what appeared to be wild carrots that oddly tasted like raw potato and white strawberries that bore an uncanny flavour of pineapple. It was something to eat at least and only made her ill the first couple of weeks of eating. At least the giant mud crabs were nothing but tasty morsels in furious pointy shells. The rusty sword she had picked up failed to be any use with fighting, instead she preferred the more obvious tactic of hanging out on a cliff edge and pushing boulders off to squish her opponents, but at least she could use it as a pretty good lever to crack the shells open.

Day and night was a difficult time to judge, the strange new world being one that perpetually lived in twilight without pause she could note. In truth she hardly new how long she had been in this place, days, weeks, months meant nothing any longer; especially when she was ever so busy hunting, eating and running away from talking corpses. Bath time in the oddly glowing warmness of the hot spring was probably the best part of her day; though as time went on she had to scowl in worry at just how ridiculously fresh and mark free her skin was looking. Even her hair was showing signs of fluffy health despite the complete lack of hair care products available in Aragog's lair. Perhaps it was one of those fountains of youth or something – not a concept she was ready to try again so soon after graduating eleven for the second time.

Her jeans had seen better days, more so her tunic and shoes however. The best part of having a giant poison spitting and ever so friendly spider friend truly made up for any fade and wear with her clothing though. After keeping well away from his webbing, for a time, curiosity had finally gotten the better of the small midgardian. The see-through threading was sticky sure but also oddly strong like some form of thin metal wiring like the kind assassins use in movies to strangle and slice peoples heads off. When properly utilised it made ever such good material to repair holes in fabric and keep it fixed - not to mention the fact you could hardly see it to tell it was not part of the clothing to begin with.

Day number who knows, Kari awoke as usual in her make shift bed of furs left behind after Aragog had eaten whatever they previously belonged to. The spider in question was hanging upside down in a curled position dangling above her head from his nest enjoying his second favourite pass time of napping until dinner vibrated the strings around him. A level of unease, boredom, fidgetiness or all three was within her today; dangerous thinking beginning to question her resolve. Something was bothering her that she had not had time to delve upon further in recent times.

Why exactly was she still here, wherever here was, and not being carted back to Asgard by someone? The answers springing forth like demonic fiends did not quell her stomach churning but did well to poke the fire in her spirit. Had she been forgotten? Left for dead? Assumed dead? Unwanted? The last possibility stung, the edges of her eyes prickling to simulate the emotional feeling into something physical before she shook her head realising she was being silly. She needed to know where she was and sitting around eating crab and pineapple-strawberries was not going to do anything but depress her – also make her fat.

Determination searing through her veins, Kari put on her shoes and took off into the misty valley with a purpose in mind – exploration. Sure she had done some rock climbing down by the beach but not yet had she dared to traipse far into the actual valley beyond Aragog's home. The noises coming from the unknown area had been somewhat on the hide in the closet level of scary.

Horrible great puffs of swirly mist blocking her view at every possible turn, weedy looking trees popping out of nowhere at any given moment startling her every time. The sounds around her reminded her of an Amazonian forest documentary she once accidentally left on whilst sleeping off the night before on the sofa back in London. David Attenborough's voice was lovely and soothing but the part with the jaguar had shocked her awake and sent half a large bag of Doritos flying across the room never to be seen again. Oh to be back in London again, watch television, eat a McChicken sandwich and not have to give up her cat to a queen. At least the queen of England was only really into corgis. Right, yes, focus.

The valley continued on further, the sky around her, that she could make out through the fog, growing oddly reddish as well as the air becoming humid. She frowned at the changes, subtle at first but rapidly accelerating as she continued on. Finally she paused taking the chance to look around before realising she was no longer sure from which part of the fog she had originally come from. There was no choice; she would have to climb a sloping edge of the valley for a better view - if only it was not mostly soggy mud.

Inhaling she took the chance for a long worn out sigh before her feet motioned her body towards the left and she attempted to climb upwards. Her feet slipped and got stuck in the sludge several times as she moved, her hands covered in sticky dirt as she was reduced to all fours. So much for washing and mending her clothes, by the time she was half way up the slope everything, including her hair, was caked in mud.

"Think of it like a free spa day." Kari muttered to herself, desperately ignoring the smell of sulphur and rotting vegetation filling her nostrils.

It was not until around the three quarter mark that the misty fog began to diminish. The top was in sight, what appeared to be grass and a few stray flowers growing in the lighter space. It was with some effort, now weighed down with mud, that Kari pulled herself to the very top of the valley's edging. She was winded, panting and lying sprawled out on her belly aware she was also hungry and thirsty as well as dirty. This has been perhaps the worst idea ever.

With a groan she rolled herself over and slowly sat up blinking in the sights. Far off to the right was Aragog seemingly perched on thin air as he twisted and turned a struggling creature that resembled a scaly bird in a cocoon – the name pterodactyl came to mind. At least one of them was about to enjoy a good hearty meal. To her left however, the view caused her breath to hitch in her throat and stay there lodged like an unwanted air bubble bobbing back and forth along her oesophagus.

A mile or so off sat a great towering castle like structure gleaming and appearing horribly imposing in black atop a curving hilltop. Surrounding on all sides were great lakes of lava – at least that explained the horrible sulphur smell. A castle, a structure, meant people though not necessarily nice people. Did she dare risk it? Was the danger worth it? The other choice was a dull life with Aragog eating potato-carrots, pineapple-strawberries with crab every night.

"Aragog!" Kari yelled standing on top of the tall mud slope waving her arms to catch the giant spiders attention. "I'm going to the castle! What am I saying, he doesn't understand me." She rolled her eyes at her own folly. "Be a good spider! See you uh… again sometime I guess!"

Aragog continued to stare across at the waving mud covered midgardian with all his many eyes before his two front limbs rose in an awkward manner. It was as if the spider were attempting to wave back as if assuming all her commotion were a new trick other than sit and fetch for him to learn. She could not help but chuckle at the spiders strange motions, waving back again several times before almost slipping off the side of the slope from laughing too hard.

With a shake of her head, Kari climbed down back to the ground; or just slipped and slid, as was the case. She tried unhelpfully to wipe some of the muck out of her face only to cover herself more completely several times as she walked through the mist hoping to be heading in the right direction. At least she had not met any horrible beasts so far, though by the state of her they would most likely pass up such a rot-smelling morsel.

After several minutes of walking the mist began to clear again, replaced with the occasional waft of floating steam that reeked of sulphur. She could see a lava pool burning bright enough to lighten the sky beyond its constant twilight phase a little ways off. Then of course a terrifying sound made her squeal before clapping her hands over her mouth. Great rasping, deep growls of displeasure filled the air mere feet to her right. Kari skittered in the opposite direction throwing herself behind an outcrop of stone and long dead logs.

It moved, fractionally, a huge clawed paw twiddling as if in the throws of some predatory dream. A dragon. A great big promise to the god's dragon lying across the ground using a dirt dune as a pillow whilst it slept. Could this get any weirder? Best not to wake it, as she was all too aware from the stories in Asgard, dragons were nothing like Puff. Oh now she had the song stuck in her head too.

Taking a deep steadying breath, the muddy midgardian hunched her back and began tiptoeing across the mostly squelching ground. Of course, the next stretch of her journey would be the kind without hiding spots. A wasteland with nothing in it but what could she do.

"Come on, you can do this." She attempted to cheer herself on, one step at a time acutely aware of the dragon's snores.

A particularly loud squelch, her entire foot disappearing into a disgusting wet patch and everything went eerily quiet. Her breath was withheld, body still as if playing a game of statues. A low groaning growl, the kind that made the spinal chord instinctually attempt to melt itself back to primal ooze, a shake in the ground, thudding, stirring, something big on the move.

"What is this? A late night snack?" A masculine sounding voice spoke from high above.  
"Ureeeee?" Kari squeaked in response as her eyes trailed upwards to stare at the shadow above her.

"How tasty is your soul I wonder?" The dragon yawned, wings flapping in his stretch hard enough to dislodge the small woman from the muck and send her rolling several feet forward. "Oh no do not leave so soon."

"Oh god!"

"I have been called many names, that one I have not heard in some time." The dragon chuckled. "I am Fafnir, the once king of Nastrond! And what," his head lowered closer, practically nose to nose with his quivering captive, "are you pray tell?"

"Ureeee?" She made another round of odd frightened noises, the dragon turning his head left and right in scrutiny before her vocal chords could ignite fully. "Human? Mostly?"

"I can not tell under so much dirt if you tell me truth."

"Hey!" Her leg was attacked, Fafnir latching onto her dirty calf with a surprisingly gentle paw as he ripped her away from the ground. "PUT ME DOWN!"

"Ah, now I see how the spirit within burns." He chuckled again, the deep reverberation shuddering from his body and into her as she dangled unpleasantly upside down in a tumble of kicking and squirming.

"What? Ah!" Kari screamed as she was unceremoniously dropped landing with a terrifying splash into an oddly glowing pool of water similar to the one in Aragog's cave. "You bastard! I'm wet!" She spluttered trying to push her now wet hair from her eyes and regain some composure as the dragon rolled onto his back from such a hearty laugh at her expense. "Stop laughing! Wanker!" Kari dragged herself from the pool, rolling onto the rocky incline in a slight pant from all the additional water weight she was now carrying.

He was still captured in hysterics as she scurried away from the scene of the crime, breaking out into a run despite the cramp now travelling up the length of her right leg. Wherever she went, whomever she met, there was always some dick waiting to make her life a misery. At least she was cleaner now and the air around her heating up the closer she came towards the lava pool.

"Oh what now!" She hissed hearing a ruckus above her followed by a familiar shaped shadow looming menacingly high in the sky.

"Where do you go little midgardian?"

"None of your business!"

"Do you seek council with the queen of Hel?" There was a level of smugness in the dragon's tone that made her try to add a little speed to her limping jog. "I would not if I were you."

"Good thing I'm not you then!"

"That is not what I said."

"I heard what you said!" She slowed her pace again, he lame excuse for running was hardly anything more than pigeon steps for a flying dragon. "STOP LAUGHING AT ME!" She seethed at the horrible beast's latest burst of mirth. "Oh my god! Piss off! Stupid dragon!"

"I am no dragon." He sounded serious now, his great hulking body coming into land ahead of her causing the soggy woman to slow to a walking pace as things got somewhat weirder. "I am a king."

"Okay… I uh…" She stared at the dragon, or as he was now, the old man standing defiantly in front of her blocking her path. "Hmmmm." Kari bit her lip, chewing idly as her brain tried the dubious task of thinking things through. "Loki?"

"You know the trickster son of Odin?"

"Sort of…?" She rolled her eyes at the accusation only to startle as hands latched on to her arms. "Get off!"

"You lied to me, you are no midgardian." Fafnir shook her violently, his body quivering from fury. "A midgardian would not have found this place. You are Aesir!"

"What?" Her eyes widened, dizzy from the shaking and really not sure what was happening any longer. "No seriously, what? I'm human! I'm from earth! I'm a Londoner! I like McChicken sandwiches!" She tugged and pulled trying to dislodge him from her. "Oh fuck you then! I don't care anymore, I've had a really hard few years dealing with all this stupid crap from magical people like you kidnapping me, violating my head, threatening me and being general dicks about everything! Go to hell mister king dragon of wherever this place is!" She finally managed to free herself from his clutches, if only because he was caught up in humour yet again – why was everyone always laughing at her? "Oh, right, laugh at me some more."

"You bitch…" Fafnir suddenly keeled over, dropping to the ground like a brick as her knee connected with his crotch.

"Yeah, put it on my tab." She rolled her eyes at the old man cradling his family jewels on the floor before running for it again.

Stupid dragons, stupid zombies, stupid mist, stupid book, stupid Odin, stupid Loki. If she ever saw Loki again, she was so going to knee him in the balls too even if her mind could not find a reason why just yet. Everything was obviously the trickster's fault and nothing would persuade her otherwise.

The smell of sulphur was gag worthy by the time she reached the next selection of rocky placements in the land. The heat was nice however, her clothes and hair beginning to dry nicely as she strolled into a canyon path looking behind her for signs of dragon or creepy old man sporadically. It could not be far now, the castle had not been so far away but perhaps the maze like path ahead of her was hiding it from view.

Coming to a dead end, Kari turned right, then left and right before becoming confused at finding herself back at the beginning again. Oh this was infuriating. She tried again taking different turns this time before finding herself scream worthy next to a very dead tree she had passed before. What was going on? Maybe this was like a defence system of some sort?

Kari sighed turning around in a circle over and over with her eyes closed before stopping, almost falling over but opening her eyes to find her finger pointed at a direction. Shoulders slumped, assurance of her choice wavering, she growled dangerously as her feet began moving down the new route. Another crossroads, the same ploy of twirling chaotic choice casting determining her next decision. Over and over this went on, minutes becoming hours, feet sore and tired, tummy rumbling and throat parched.

"Who goes there?"

"Oh shit!" Kari froze mid-step, her eyes trailing upwards painfully slowly as she took in the entire form of a gigantic wolf. "What the hell are you?"

"I am Garm of Hel." The big dog growled with an oddly feminine tone.

"Eh?" Kari continued to stare unblinking trying to process the idea of a giant pooch talking to her. "Are you a hallucination?"

"I am a Hel-hound." Garm sounded oddly calm as if this were a conversation she was used to having or perhaps just occupied with other tasks.

"I think I need to sit down."

"As you wish."

"Why are you chained exactly?" Kari queried from the floor, having plopped down on her rear, when her legs could take the stress of her mind in turmoil no longer. "Is this like your uh…. Dog house?"

"I guard the path to Hel."

"Oh so uh… I uh… can't go in?"

"I only stop souls wishing to leave."

"Oh right." She sighed with some relief before frowning at a new question forming on her tongue. "Wait, does that mean if I go in I can't come out again?"

"Only if you are dead."

"Oh good because I'm not I swear." Kari chuckled only to have her amusement pitter out from the silence emanating off the giant wolf shaped guardian of Hel and stood dusting her now dry but still rather dirty clothes. "Well uh, nice meeting you er, Garm."

The silence greeting her farewell made her body involuntarily shake with anticipation. There was something kind of off about the big dog and not just the way it talked and apparently drank miracle grow as a puppy. Kari slowly walked passed the hel-hound guard, aware all to acutely of the burning eyes trained on her back as she tried her best not to just start running and startle Garm into chasing. Dogs were strange; cats were better.

She made her way around another bend in the canyon pathways finally discovering the way out as it led to a wide-open space before the great steps towards the black castle seen from afar. It was so close now, safety of some kind she hoped. Of course, something had to ruining it all though.

"Ah!" Kari screamed as a corpse warrior sauntered past giving her a strange look over his shoulder.

That was weird; the zombies on the beach always attacked and babbled on at her but that one just walked on by like he had better things to do. All right, there were more of them wandering around now she got a better look but like the previous walking corpse busy ignoring her too. What was going on? Why were they not trying to eat her brain? Was there something wrong with her brain?

Taking a deep steadying breath she walked on, eyes twittering side to side as she kept her focus on the zombies around her despite their complete lack of care at her presence. The steps up to the castle were the next challenge, her legs were already sore and tired and here was a lot of step aerobics to complete. She groaned, exhaling a weary sound similar to a zombie as she placed one foot in front of the other and shuffled up the stone steps one at a time. It felt worse than the running away from a dragon in wet clothes part of her little adventure. The temptation to lay down once she reached the top was almost overwhelming but there were guards to deal with.

"Heeeeey." She waved tiredly at a spear wielding guard blocking the door to the keep from her. "Can I come in?"

"You are not expected." The guard was surprisingly well articulated for a dead man. "Who are you?"  
"Um… Kari er… Kari Fa-Motter. Kari Motter." There was a moment of shared stares between herself and the guard as if he hardly believed her especially when she smiled at him. "Really, my name is Kari Motter."

"Wait here." He shrugged shooting the second guard a hidden glance that made them both guffaw before he disappeared into the castle.  
"Mind if I sit down?" Kari queried the bored looking second guard only to be ignored as she claimed a spot on the floor anyway. "I am so bushed right now. Been a long walk and run. You know there's a giant dog out there? You probably already knew that. There's a dragon that turns into a creepy old man too. Had to kick him in the balls to escape." She smirked at the guard's second guffaw of the day. "There's a giant spider called Aragog too but he's a really nice spider, kept all those other zombies off my back. Really surprised you aren't trying to eat me like them lot right now actually and I-"

"She will see you."

"Huh? What? Who?" Kari startled as the first guard reappeared holding the door open for her. "Who will see me?"

"Queen Hela whom you seek an audience with." He flashed his fellow guard another look causing humour to ignite once more.

"Oh right, yes, yes of course." She stood with a 'tsk' of pain from the ache in her back. "What do I just go in or? Okay yeah, thanks uh… bye."

Waving the guards of, Kari hesitantly wandered inside the black castle shivering at the odd chill within as the door closed behind her. There was a strange buzz in the air, like static before a storm, making her teeth feel uncomfortable and the hairs on the back of her neck stand to attention. Where was she supposed to go now? Onwards, ever forward into the belly of the beast.

Taking a deep breath, hands folded neatly under her armpits for added warmth, she scurried deeper into the castle following the long corridor ahead. As she neared the far end a large open archway led out into a much bigger room reminding her all too strangely of the throne room in asgard's palace; except there was no gold here.

"Hello?" She called out to the room only to receive her echoing response as she slowly continued forward eyeing the walls with curiosity and a hint of suspicion. "Am I supposed to be in here?"

"Doubtful."

"Ah!" Kari squealed as she flung herself around almost tripping on her own feet at the feminine voice behind her. "Who are you?"

"You are not what I expected they looked for." An elegant, tall, woman draped in fine clothing and quite an astonishingly well crafted crazy hat watched the lip chewing midgardian with a tired inquisitiveness.

"What? Someone is looking for me?"

"They looked, they found nothing, they gave up and went home to continue with their lives." The queen turned gracefully, making her way across the room to lounge across a canapé leaving her guest to stand. "Strange that you would find your way here after so many years. It is not customary for souls to come to me especially when so alive."

"Okay, look, start from the beginning please I have no idea what you are talking about." Kari waved her hands in front of her, trying to figure out what was going on and who the strange woman was. "And what do you mean 'so many years'?"

"It has been eight years since first the Warriors three and Balder rode into my realm seeking to find you." Hela sighed as if recalling a very dull argument with equally dull creatures. "I told them you were not here, as you were not to my knowledge."

"Eight years?"

"You fail to recollect this time? Not so surprising. Loki seemed sure you had some how created a mess with a dimensional displacement spell. The power needed to successfully initiate a stable portal would have been significant but stranger successes have happened over the centuries."

"What are you going on about?" Kari groaned giving up and drooping to the floor for the third time in the last hour or so. "Look, I was in Asgard maybe eight weeks ago not eight years ago and it was just a teleport thingy to Jotunheim!"

"Interesting."

"Really?" She was sceptical at the flippant queens words.

"I was trying to be polite."

"Whatever." Kari rolled her eyes trying not to flip the bird at the lounging woman and get thrown in a dungeon or something. "Look could you help me get to Jotunheim?"

"Why ever would you wish to go to such a cold and inhospitable realm?"

"I kind of have grandmothers there."

"I think not."

"What? I don't have grandmothers there?"

"That is doubtful knowing your lineage seeded from Fandral the dashing but that was not to which I was referring."

"Er?"

"I will not send you to Jotunheim." Hela rose from her canapé, poised steps tapping out a rhythm on the polished floor beneath her as she made her way back to her guest. "But I will send you to a place you need to be."

"What's that suppose to-"


	60. Chapter 60: Backwards english

A strange sense of vertigo induced sickness wrapped it's claws around the pit of her stomach, her head feeling shaken about as if riding a rollercoaster with her eyes shut before weight and gravity became available again. There was a jolt; Kari's rear meeting a cold floor as she mostly collapsed into a heap painfully aware of just how loud she was breathing. The blackness behind her eyelids was both comforting and a terrifying reminder of what it was to be blind. As sensation returned to her skin, prickling and warmth reassuring her she was still alive, melody and accompaniment filled her ears. A string quartet? Not a selection of instruments she had heard in a few years but home sickeningly familiar in a haunting manner.

Opening her eyes, Kari stared at the wall in front of her blinking in its like and rising an eyebrow of relief at finding it to be white marble tiles mottled with black instead of puketastic gold. This was not asgard, the pillar she leaned against was stone, the music she heard was classical, the two women staring at her from across the shadowed alcove they shared adorned in western fashion. Even the garbled chatter, like English spoken backwards, coming from a man on a podium in the centre of the room was so painfully memorable she had begun to weep with joy.

Then there was screaming.

The music halted, the atmosphere growing static and humid as clusters of well-dressed visitors and guests clung together backing up against the pillars. Kari carefully pulled herself up, muscles tense and weary as she fought to stand. A squelching sound permeated her ears making her feel nauseous for the fraction of a second before the people around her were on the move like startled cattle pushing and pulling. She was knocked down again by a gaggle of women, rolling into a ball to escape stiletto style trampling. Shaking all over, suffering from everything bad she could imagine when so hungry, thirsty and fighting the ringing in her ears, she crawled back to the pillar dragging herself up for the second and hopefully last time.

The cold stone brought some relief to her cheeks as she continued to cling, glancing around the room at the stragglers fighting to escape before something caught her eye. A man in a suit, no, golden armour and a green cloak swanning towards the exit with hardly a care in the world. It was good to know even Loki shaped creatures could get on with there lives happily enough after she had been suspected dead for eight years.

Stumbling forward, feet unsteady, Kari limped on ward hissing between her teeth at aches and pains before a groan managed to escape and change the otherwise fatigued atmosphere. The body of a man lying sprawled out on a dual cow headed slab like some offering to a long lost god. Actually, the cows horns carried a certain uncanny resemblance to a helmet she had seen only moments before. Did that idiot think he was a bull? She could not dwell on this for too long, all the blood dripping off the stone altar was starting to make her both queasy and oddly hungry for a beef burger – if only this little get together had come with canapés and not the sofa kind.

With a great hefty sigh she took to a leisurely walk, one step at a time, pausing briefly to pluck an untouched Champaign flute from a tray of many on her way towards the doors. Fizzy wine, it tasted like feet but that was not going to stop her downing the glass and picking up a second for later. This big old building really was rather pretty, the sort of place to have a nice wedding reception at or something. The red carpet to and out of the door was a nice touch also. She had never walked on a red carpet before, not a proper one anyway, that had appropriate gold and red roped pole-fencing stuff. If only she was dressed for the occasion.

Stepping out into the street she paused to take a long drawing of breath, savouring the musky damp scent of earth air. There were even old fashioned, posh people, lamps on the street and proper cars. Oh it had been some time since she had seen a car; a shame really they had not changed much in ten years. Some how she had expected the human race to evolve a bit more by now, there should have been hover cars, new haircuts and automatic doors for every building. The doors to this place were kind of on the heavy side. Where was this anyway? And what was Loki doing behind that upturned car shouting like a madman? On closer inspection, he was literally being a madman.

"-you were made to be ruled." Loki was sounding rather pleased with himself, the swaggering he was doing into a crowd of kneeling midgardians certainly adding to the smug appearance. "In the end you will always kneel."

A pause, the madman faltering in his step as an elderly gentleman rose from the ground differing from his comrades as one without fear. The determination, resilience to subjugation, in his eyes was clear and bright for even Kari to make out from across the street as she watched on with a confused frown. What exactly was going on here? This all seemed rather beneath the prince of asgard she used to know.

"Not to men like you." The old man stated, his tone continuing to mirror the theme of resistance from his poise.

"There are no men like me." Loki chuckled finding humour in a joke he knew the others around him would not understand.  
"There are always men like you."  
"Look to your elder, people." Amusement continued to permeate the trickster's words, his staff rising in his hand and taking aim on its target with a thrumming blue glow. "Let him be an example."

The weapon fired, the crowd around the two men flinging further to the ground in fear with the added bonus of squeals. Even Kari found her knees giving out, shock and violence proving too much for an already low blood sugar level addled body. A blur of mostly blue hurtled downwards to quick for the eye to focus upon until it was still. Shield up reflecting Loki's blast, and sending it hurtling back at him, the figure of a large and formidable looking man straightened his form to begin a deliberate walk towards the prince fallen to his own knees but rising again.

"You know, the last time I was in Germany and saw a man standing above everyone else, we ended up disagreeing." Captain America spoke with ease like a well practiced performer of speeches as the fearful crowd around him began to rally confidence and stand.  
"The soldier." Loki lifted himself up by leaning on his staff, his tone dark and humourless despite the laughter leaving his lips. "The man out of time."

"I'm not the one that's out of time." He stood stoic, defiant, as an airship came into view somewhere behind the lone avenger.  
"Loki, drop the weapon and stand down." A female voice erupted from the ships PA system.

There was a momentary pause, a large gunning system aimed from the ship, Captain America standing strong with his shield and finally Loki glaring his disobedience of the order before taking a shot aimed for the woman seeking to control him. The airship rolled hard to the right, dodging the attack, as the masked hero on the ground threw his shield like a boomerang at the target causing the asgardian prince to stumble and clench his teeth in annoyance. Everything from then on devolved into a fist fight followed by spear to shield combat whilst the now free to leave civilian captives returned to their favoured pastime of screaming and running away.

Captain America was thrown, falling hard on the concrete and sliding back several feet before regaining his feet in a well-controlled roll. Oh, he had done this before. Throwing his shield for the second time, Loki knocked it away before the dance really began. Sweeping strokes of the spear, a super soldier ducking and bending with magnificently springy ease before the inevitable of an equally sprite but better equipped opponent flung him to the ground again. The trickster marched forward, the blunt end of his weapon pushing down on the top of the avenger's head to hold him to the ground.

"Kneel." He ordered his prisoner, the unbridled irritation in the prince's voice growling between his bared teeth.  
"Not today."

The soldier proved himself no slow poke, Loki's underestimation of his opponent catching him off guard as he twisted out from under his confine and managed to plant a resounding 'thud' to the asgardians face with his knee. Angered, Loki fought back with his superior strength, lifting the avenger and throwing him away like an unwanted drink can onto the pavement – madman and a litter bug. There was a noise then that distracted him from his task of squishing an annoying insect beneath his boots. Well more to the fact a word followed by music.

"Loki!" Kari shouted startling the prince into a whip around to stare at the dishevelled, venomous, creature on the steps just above the brawling pair.

His eyes widened for a split second, something akin to relieved surprise mixed in with the crazy and confusion taking in her appearance as if an illusion of his mind. Then of course the music started, blaring from the airship loud enough to make Kari hold her ears and Loki remember himself as he turned to face the next threat from the mortal world. Taking that threat right to the chest had definitely not been what he expected when he pivoted and spotted the red and gold blur that was Iron man slamming into him and hurtling him backwards onto the stairs.

The trickster flipped landing awkwardly on his front as the newest avenger member to arrive on the scene steadied his self in an overly choreographed pose. It really would not have surprised Kari if the man inside the suit spent several hours a day practicing ways to look 'cool' for the cameras but that was a worry rather beyond her now as she stepped closer to the fallen prince righting himself to sit.

"Make your move, reindeer games." Iron man mocked, his armour reforming around the arms to hold his hostage at miniature rocket and blaster point as the trickster lifted his hands up in surrender - additionally shimmering out of his fancy evening wear in favour of his casual war lording leather outfit. "Good move." Stark continued, standing down as his fellow avenger came to join him slightly out of breath.  
"Mr Stark."  
"Cap'n." They finished greeting one another as the only civilian left on scene collapsed onto the step next to the enemy. "Uh, friend of yours?"

"You look repulsive." Loki ignored the man in iron's question to give the strange smelling woman next to him a nose crinkling once over.  
"Dragon, mud crabs, zombies." She waved him off too tired, hungry and mystified about what was going on enough to explain herself further, though the trickster seemed to take her three words with a nod of understanding – perhaps having suffered the same series of events at some point himself. "Could someone get me a McChicken sandwich please? And a McFlurry if they still make them?" Kari looked up at the two hero's exchanging glances at the request; her stomach was in dire need of rescuing after all. "What year is it anymore, anyway?"


	61. Chapter 61: Not the love boat

Without need of an excuse, because being guilty by association was still a crime even in twenty twelve apparently, Kari found herself happily escorted on board the small airship of some kind and allowed to sit in a much comfier chair than she had been used to for a while now. This was all so very strange still; the blinking lights, the sounds, the musky air and real human beings instead of gods and dead gods. She could not help but stare at everything with a wide-eyed wonder, though getting strapped into her seat by Captain America's gentle but firm hands was certainly attention worthy.

"If you don't mind me saying, ma'am, you look like you've been through hell and back." The stars and stripes adorned hero talked casually, as he finished adjusting the straps to fit the small woman snugly into her chair, with an added prolonged blue eyed stare at her scoffing of his words. "Did I hear you mention before something about a dragon?"

"You really don't want to know." Kari looked away suddenly feeling uncomfortable by the continuation of the man's gaze, dimly aware of being read like an open book.

"If Reindeer games has a pet dragon, I want to know about it and where I can get one for myself." Stark cut in as if any more great hulking men needed to do an imposing lean above the fatigued prisoner.

"This is not a joke." Steve stood from his hunched position to give his full and undivided consideration to his armoured comrade.

"Who's joking?"

"Nobody has a dragon." Kari spat back, the heat and man odour surrounding her like a thick layer of testosterone was beginning to make her edgy - especially as neither intruder had anything to eat on them.

"So if you're not the dragon keeper, then who are you, curly Sue?"

"Uh… K-"

"Kari, goddess of wind and blizzards." Loki cut in before she had the chance to introduce herself.

"Eh?" Kari tried to lean forward, only to find herself restricted and space unavailable, attempting to comprehend what new and wondrous lies had just exited the prince's mouth.

"Another asgardian?" The overly tight uniform wearing lady spy appeared from the cockpit with ears burning as she glanced between the prisoners.

"Eh?" Kari repeated with added emphasis on the question mark this time around.

"He's lying." Steve's frown filtered into his tone.

"What makes you say that?" Stark queried as his arms folded; the level of bravado between the two men building up rather nicely.

"Because he's Loki."

"He's right, you can read the girl like a book." Both men turned to look at the red head, there posturing distilled a moment to further change there gaze back to the female prisoner now pouting at what could only be taken as an insult.

"She is the protégé of Fandral the dashing." Loki withheld the smirk Kari was sure he was so desperate to release. "You recall him do you not?"

"One of the asgardians that helped to defend Puente Antiguo a year ago?"

"He did?" Kari interjected at the thought of her grandfather doing something other than swanning around the palace, preening himself and bedding women.

"Is this true?" Agent Romanoff was now interrogating from what little Kari could tell.

"Well… I suppose, I mean… I don't know what a protégé is, I thought it was kinky underwear-"

"Ah, I think you mean a negligee there, but an easy mistake to make." Stark was quick to jump in and correct with the topic being so up his alley.

"Is that what it's called? With the straps and-"

"You can discuss lingerie another time." The spy all but clicked her fingers in front of the prisoner to get her back on topic.

"Right, uh, yeah, uh, he's my granddad." She shrugged with some finality as if this explained everything for the last ten years – or two and a bit from her perception of time.

With that irrelevant slice of information out of the way she quickly became another piece of the furniture, strapped to a chair, as the three-man team of avengers decided to give Loki a well deserved looming over. Of course, being Loki, he was about as co-operative as a crazy bag of cats; his words for the time being used up as he shut down into silence mode staring between the cluster of interrogators at a mat of brown curly hair across from him trying desperately to ignore him. As the shield agent finally ran out of questions to not get a response to, she manoeuvred herself back to the cockpit with a confident purpose.

"What are you doing?" Kari half whispered, half mouthed at the staring asgardian once the two male heros had wandered away to have another round of 'who is the manliest', now they were all safely off the ground and flying to wherever.

"Why are you whispering, is this a library?" He mouthed back much to her confusion for a handful of seconds.

"Dick!" She lifted her pinkie finger giving it a twiddle to emphasis just how big she reckoned his real staff was before looking away to have a pout at the back of the vessel.

This was not how she had expected anything to go down. Coming back to earth should have been joyous, a lot less eventful and a non-arrestable offense. Why was Loki here anyway? He sure liked to make fun of her midgardian, mortal, status back on asgard. Maybe he secretly wanted to be human, that might explain a lot. Now she was staring at him critically, which the prince did not seem to like very much if his tightening brows were anything to go by - a change in the tide of battle that made her chuckle awkwardly louder than she would have liked. Iron man and Captain America giving her an eyebrow raised glance, however, was definitely the least of her problems when a storm overhead started up.

"What's the matter?" Steve questioned a panicking Loki staring upwards at the rumble of thunder surrounding them. "Scared of a little lightening?"  
"I'm not overly fond of what follows." He responded as if in warning.

Glances were exchanged among the occupants of the airship, Kari shrugging as blue eyes fell on her for a second time before drifting away to join all the staring the ceiling was getting. As if on queue a very loud 'thud' occurred as something big and heavy collided with the roof and an agitated squeal escaped the over imaginative female prisoners lips. This did not sound good; actually this sounded like a horror movie bad which technically was an audience good.

Stark and Steve both reached out to opposite sides of the vessel, one collecting his helmet and the other bracing himself to tug on his hood, readying for imminent trouble. On the other hand the lady spy practically eye rolled at all the commotion, rebalancing the ship and setting it back on its original course. Of course, Iron man being Tony Stark, was the first to assert his dominance and open the hatch at the back of the craft.

"What are you doing?" Steve called over the volume of the hydraulics in action and air pressure stabilising inside the small space.

Stark was not listening however, his long silent, strides towards the door only halted when forcibly stopped. A great hulking figure dropped down from the top of the ship, landing heavily on the ramp way leading in. Kari would have laughed at the trickster's expression of fright if not equally as freaked out by all the noises, confusion and general airsickness she was getting from the goings on. A hammer was thrown, Iron man went flying backwards and without another word Thor had his hands around his brothers throat and hauled him off into the atmosphere as if dropping hundreds of feet in a storm was no big deal. It probably was not to a bunch of crazy gods but that was all beside the point; the point being something else entirely.

"OH MY GOD!" Kari shouted loud enough for everyone to hear whether they wanted to or not. "DID THAT BASTARD JUST LEAVE ME HERE?"  
"And now there's that guy." Iron man got to his feet from the crumpling he had previous done on the floor from the hammer blow.

"Another asgardian?" Romanoff called from the cockpit, looking over her chair a split second to try and get a better glance at what was going on behind her.

"That guys a friendly?" Captain America seemed utterly confused about the situation, his attention drifting from face to face trying to find some sense in all the madness surrounding him.

"He's an idiot that's what he is." Kari decided to throw in her two cents, arms folded as she glared at the floor somewhat on the annoyed and dangerous side of livid.

"It doesn't matter, if he frees Loki or kills him, the tesseract is lost." Iron man waved all the talk off in favour of action.

"Stark we need a plan of attack." Steve shouted after the armour wearing billionaire making his way out of the ship.

"I have a plan." He paused, turning to look across the deck at his fellow avenger with a hint of irony. "Attack."

Without another word, Iron man was out the door, stabilisers igniting to power him mid air on the trail of the falling asgardians. The stars and stripes wearing soldier was suddenly running on diesel, darting across the vessel to snag a parachute and beginning to strap himself to it, intent on going after all persons involved in leaping out of the ship.

"I'd sit this one out cap'." Romanoff called from her piloting seat, distracted otherwise with flashing lights and important looking switches to flip.

"I don't see how I can."

"These guys come from legend, they're basically gods."

"There's only one god, ma'am, and I'm pretty sure he doesn't dress like that." Captain America disapproved, snatching up his shield before taking a running leap out of the airship.

Well this was nice. It seemed like everybody on board, bar the pilots, wanted off the ship but unlike her, actually had that as a viable option. Even Loki got to leave and he was a criminal or something. What was Thor doing here as well anyway? Picking up his brother no doubt and leaving her behind to fend for herself. Actually, maybe that was a good thing; she did not really want to go back to Asgard, not with one-eyed Odin-complex still alive. Well, it had been eight years so maybe he was dead; Odin was a very old looking man after all, anything could have happened. Living on earth again though? She would have to get a job, a new place, new clothes and start paying council tax again. What if she was registered dead or something? That would be really awkward and no doubt long and tedious to clear up. Right, earth was starting to sound like a pain in the butt. Maybe she could still get to Jotunheim again? That would probably involve Loki's help and he seemed pretty close to finding himself behind bars soon if all this malarkey was anything to go by.

"Ugh!" Kari groaned loudly as she slumped into her seat as best she could when so neatly strapped to it. "Whatever…"


End file.
